Samantha Bender
by trufflesun
Summary: What if John Bender had a younger sister. Someone who knows the REAL John Bender. Meet Samantha (aka Sammy) Bender. Her parents ignore her, for the most part. Rated T for cuss words, though some is censored.
1. Chapter 1:Introduction

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV...  
>They don't acknowlage me. I don't exist. Only John pays me any attention. Hi. My name is Samantha Bender, John Bender's younger sister. I am fifteen years old. Our father hits John, so does our mother. But she mostly just yells at him. I got a detention today for skipping school to get a smoke. I smoke sometimes. Ciggarattes. But not as much as John. I definantly don't do drugs like him. I had to get the detention slip signed. I knew John would get punished for my wrongdoing, so I decided I would have John forge the signiture.<br>I walked into the house. Father looked at me angrily, like he does whenever I get in trouble. He knew all right, but said nothing to me. I walked past him and upstairs to my room. John walked in the house. All hell broke loose.  
>"You're late,"Father yelled.<br>He's going to pay. Poor, innocent John is going to pay for my selfish mistake.  
>"So,"John said.<br>Father slapped him across the face. _**'Don't hit him'**_, I thought angrily,_**'You're mad at me, not him! Hit me!**_'  
>"Don't you talk back to me,"Father shouted,"You worthless trash!"<br>I ran into my room and slammed the door. I couldn't watch. I had two picture frames that I kept on my dresser. Simple Polaroid pictures, in a cheap wooden frame. One was of John, and one was of me. I picked up the one of John and looked at it closely. He looked so tough in it, wearing his jacket. It looked so much different than how I see him everyday, lying on the floor, crying, defeated. Why does he pay me any attention? He COULD just ignore me like our parents, but he DOESN'T.  
>There was a loud crash and more yelling. John was probably being thrown around. After a while, I wondered where John went. I'd figured he went to his room after a while. I was right. I found him sitting on his bed in his room, finishing off a cigarette. His room consists of an old mattress that he sleeps on, a small closet with some clothes, and some posters of girls and movies on his wall. His room was a little messier than mine, with crumpled paper and trash on the floor. My room looked better than his, and I hated it. I had a full bed, not just a mattress to sleep on. I had a closet with a bunch of clothes in it. I had a mini-fridge in my room. John bought the mini-fridge at a yard sale a long time ago. He buys food with money he gets from his job. We keep it in my room because my parents never go there. As I said, I do not exist.<br>He looked up at me.  
>"Hey sis,"He said, trying to look happy,"What's going on?"<br>"I'm sorry,"I said,"It was my fault."  
>He looked confused.<br>"Huh,"He asked.  
>"I got a detention,"I said,"That's why he hit you."<br>"Not your fault,"He said,"What'd you do anyways?"  
>"I got a detention,"I said,"On Saturday."<br>He smiled. I saw the pain in his eyes. He looked like he was trying to hold back tears. I knew how much he hated getting beat, and how much it scared him.  
>"Looks like you're in with me then,"He said.<br>"Why didn't he just hit me,"I wondered as I sat by him on his bed/mattress.  
>"DON'T say that,"He said,"DON'T EVER say that! You WOULD NOT want this sh*t!"<br>"Better than being ignored,"I said,"At least you exist!"  
>"Wish I didn't,"he said,"Sometimes...I wish I was never born..."<br>"No, don't say that,"I said,"If you weren't here, I don't know what I'd do."  
>John's POV..<br>It was true. I would've offed myself a long time ago or ran away if it weren't for Sammy. If I left, the bastard would start beating on her. I couldn't let that happen. Not to my baby sister, not to Sammy. I love her to death. I practically raised her since she was a baby. I would warn her as a toddler to be quiet so she wouldn't anger our father. I would hide her in my closet while Father was in one of his drunken rages. I was only three years old when she was born, but I knew how to survive in this f*ck*d up place. I knew from day one that I had to protect her.  
>She's the only person I show my feelings around. I try to be tough for her, but sometimes I can't help but break down and cry. This is one of those times. She squeezed me tightly in a hug.<br>"Hey,"I said,"Guess who else is coming to detention?"  
>"Who,"she asked.<br>"Andrew,"I said,"The wrestler. The one you have a crush on."  
>She blushed.<br>"I don't know what you're talking about,"She said, trying to keep a straight face  
>"Come on,"I joked,"I saw you gawking at him when we were at his house. You were all over him, flirting and such."<br>She punched my arm.  
>"Okay,"She said,"I admit it."<br>**Flashback...**  
><strong>We'd went to Andrew's house a week ago. Sammy ran outside, warning me not to come in. She said that our father had a knife and was drunker than usual. She said he threw the knife and it barely missed her, hitting the wall. She was terrified, crying. I took her and ran to Andrew's house. It was the closest. Andrew let us in. <strong>  
><strong>"Is that your new girlfriend, Bender,"Andrew asked,"Thought you were dating Claire. She's a little young, ain't she? She's cute though."<strong>  
><strong>I pinned him against the wall. How DARE he insult my sister?<strong>  
><strong>"Shut up about my sister,"I demanded.<strong>  
><strong>"Sorry man,"He said,"Didn't even know you had a sister."<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah, well,"Sammy said,and walked up to Andrew,"I'm kind of the black sheep of the family. They don't acknowledge me. Except for John here. Hi, my name is Samantha, Sammy for short. I'm a freshman in high school."<strong>  
><strong>"I'm Andrew,"Andrew said,"Andy for short."<strong>  
><strong>"You're the wrestler right,"she asked,"The senior?"<strong>  
><strong>"That's right,"He said.<strong>  
><strong>Sammy had that look on her face, and I knew she was already thinking about what to name their children.<strong>


	2. The Secret

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV  
><em>Friday night...<em>  
>John didn't know. I don't tell him, I won't ever tell him. As badly as I want to, I just can't. It only happens once in a while, not everyday, like it does to John. If he knew, he would never leave home again. It only happens when John doesn't come home in time, before Father gets drunk and angry, about midnight or so. Sometimes, John is out with his friends, getting high or something , and he forgets.<br>But he doesn't know. It only happens when I am careless and don't get to my closet or under my bed in time. _**Run into the closet when you hear footsteps, or under your bed if there isn't time. Don't move, or he'll hear you.**_ John had taught me that. But I was too late this time, I didn't hear the footsteps because I wasn't paying attention. I should know better by now. A shadow entered my room. I was shoved face first onto the floor. I couldn't see who it was. I usually can't see who it is, but have learned through the strength of the beating. Father was much more brutal than Mother was. With Mother, it was a few silent, wordless throws across the room, just like with John. With Father, there were still no words or sounds. Just a few silent kicks and punches to the back and stomuch and slaps to the face.  
>It was definantly Father. This time, he wore steel toed boots. On purpose, I'm sure. He kicked me a few times and it knocked the wind out of me. He twisted my arm behind my back untill I screamed. He let go and stomped out of the room.<br>John came home later. I ran to the closet as soon as I heard footsteps. Father was exceptionaly angry today. I cowered in the closet, trying to block out the sound of John screaming and tumbling down the stairs. Moments later, the closet door was opened. I gasped, but it was only John. I stood up and hugged him, ignoring the pain from the kicks and the bruises they would probably form. I let him sleep in my bed, and walked to the bathroom to look at my back. When I took off my shirt and looked in the mirror. A few large bruises covered my back and torso. Under the bruises were scars. These same scars were on my stomuch and side. Long, pinkish white scars. I traced my finger along a perticularly long one on my side, remembering the pain that stemmed from each one. Not all of them cracked open and bled. But all of them were the width of a belt.  
>I went back to my room, where I saw John. His face pushed into the pillow, sobbing lightly. I kissed his forehead.<br>"I know Johnny,"I said,"I know."  
>I waited untill I knew he was asleep so he couldn't hear me. I whispered,"We just can't win now, can we?"<p> 


	3. Detention

Andrew, John ,and I were the only ones in detention that Saturday. I sat next to John. Vernon came in to tell us to sit and not talk.  
>"You look new,"Vernon said to me,"What's your name?"<br>"Samantha Bender,"I said,"I'm a freshman."  
>"You two married,"Vernon said sarcasticly, then looked at me,"Aren't you a little young to be married."<br>I sat and stared blankly, not thinking of anything to say. John came to my defense, as usual.  
>"She's my sister,Dick,"John said.<br>"Oh god,"Vernon said as he walked to his office, "There's two of them!"  
>I waited until he left and pulled out a sandwitch bag from my pocket. It contained three chocolate bars, the large ones that break into twelve peices. I handed one to John and left another on the table for me. I took the wrapper off the third one, set the wrapper on the table and brought the chocolate bar to Andy. I turned around and gave my brother the "shh" signal, and he winked.<br>"Hey Andy"I said.  
>"Yeah,"he asked.<br>"Want a chocolate bar,"I asked,"They're homemade."  
>"Sure,"he said.<br>He took the candy and examined it. Then he sat it down and looked up at me with a bored, but amused look on his face.  
>"So,"he started,"These are Homemade?"<br>"Yep,"I said.  
>"Because they look suspiciously like Hershey's chocolate bars,"He said.<br>"Well, don't look at ME,"I said,"John made them."  
>"So why did he write Hershey's on them,"he asked.<br>"I will not sit here,"I said in my best phony British fancy person accent,"And listen to you insult my brother's cooking. Good day sir!"  
>I walked back to the seat and sat back by John. Andy turned around, munching on his candy bar, and pointed at me.<br>"You...,"He said to me,"Are an exact copy, of your brother."  
>I pretended to be embarrassed. But I wasn't. I wanted to be like him. Maybe not the drugs or the criminal things he does, but his courage. He never backs down. He always sticks up for himself, even if it means pain for him. I looked a little like him too. I had the same brown hair and dark brown eyes.<br>"Nah, I just look like him,"I said.  
>Andy smirked.<br>"How come no one knows you're related,"Andy asked.  
>"He's embarrassed of me,"I said.<br>John put his arm on my shoulder. Ouch.  
>"No way,"he said.<br>I suddenly became annoyed.  
>"Then why doesn't anyone know I'm your sister, huh,"I said,"You ignore me, just like our parents!"<br>_**Why did I say that**_? He recoiled, like when father screams at him.  
>"I tell people about you,"he said,"That's why people don't mess with you much. They'll have to deal with me. Your ex-boyfriend, the scum who cheated on you, I kicked his ass."<br>"Oh,"I said,"Thanks."  
>"No problem,"He said,"Pretty easy."<br>I laughed. I could see that he was hurt. He was seen as a tough guy, with no feelings, but I know that if people could see what I saw, all the scars and bruises on him, maybe they wouldn't be so scared of him. But he wants people to be scared of him. He feels weak at home, so he wants to feel strong everywhere he goes, to be in control.  
>He told me about how Vernon locked him in a closet, or tried to , and threatened him. He didn't hit him, he knew it was a trick. It scared the shit out of him, reminded him of Father. John pretends that the beatings he gets from our parents doesn't bother him, but they do. He used to wonder why our parents hated him so much. Sometimes, he cries at night. I let him sleep in my room sometimes. I hated seeing him cry and whimper. He's so tough, so brave. Our bastard father tortures him.<br>"You're brave you know that,"I told him,"Really brave."  
>"No, I'm not,"He said,"I'm a coward. A no good, worthless coward."<br>Those were Father's words. I put my arm around him, he winced.  
>"Did he whip you again,"I asked quietly, so Andy couldn't hear,"Is that what that noise was last night?"<br>"Yeah,"John said.  
>He rolled up his sleeve. There were red, swollen lash marks on his arm. Andy gasped in horror. I wasn't shocked, I'd seen worse.<br>"I had to cover my face,"John explained,"There's more on my back.. and my legs. There was some blood. Don't look so horrified Sporto, I'm used to it."  
>Andy turned back and faced forward again. He'd finished off his chocolate bar.<br>"I should've helped you,"I said,"Instead of cowering in the damn closet."  
>"You were right to hide,"John said,"He was in a drunken rage. You could've gotten hurt."<br>_**You have no idea.**_

John's POV  
><em>last night...<em>  
>Father was drunk(what a surprise). He was especially brutal that day. He slapped me and belted me in the face. It wasn't hard enough to leave a mark. I covered my face. I wasn't going to lie down and cower, like he wanted. He punched me in my stomach and I crouched. I was lifted by my hair and thrown down the stairs. 'Would this be the day,'I wondered,'The day he would lose it and just kill me?' I screamed, out of hate, and fear. He came after me and started belting me. He got my arm that was covering my face, and my legs and by back.<br>"You gonna cry, you little b*tch,"He taunted.  
>"No,"I mumbled defiantly.<br>"What'd you say to me,"He demanded, still beating me.  
>"I said NO,"I said louder.<br>He hit me a few more times, then left. I was lying on the ground, cowering. He'd gotten what he wanted. He won. And I lost. Again.  
>I limped to the bathroom to clean my wounds. I didn't want to bother Sammy. She's probably too scared to come out of her room. Probably hiding in her closet. I don't blame her for being scared. I took off my shirt and wrapped some gauze around the lashes. They'd bled, but only a little. I put my shirt back on and went to Sammy's room. She was, as I'd predicted, hiding in the closet. She gasped as I opened the door, then ran and hugged me. It hurt like hell when she touched my back, but I pretended it didn't. She let me sleep in her bed that night. I remembered how I'd been defeated again. I rolled to my side and pushed my head into the pillow. I let the tears of defeat fall.<br>Present...  
>"It's okay to be scared,"I assured her,"Hell, even I was scared."<br>She grabbed me and hugged me again, but let go when I winced.  
>"Sorry,"She said.<br>"It's okay,"I told her.

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV  
>John sighed and walked over to a shelf of books. He sat behind them, where we couldn't see him.<br>Andy walked over and sat in John's chair, next to me.  
>"Is he okay,"Andy asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said,"He just doesn't want us to see him."  
>"What's he doing,"he asked.<br>"Probably crying,"I said.  
>"He cries,"Andy asked.<br>"Yes,"I snapped,"Unlike you, he has feelings. He's not just some robot with no emotions!"  
>"I didn't mean it like that,"He said,"I just meant that..you just..you can't tell by just looking at him."<br>"He's got an image to keep up,"I said,"No one's ever seen him after one of our parent's beatings. Are you guys friends?"  
>Andy thought for a second.<br>"Yeah,"He said,"I consider him a friend. Why?"  
>"I'll tell you something no one knows,"I said,"No one but me and him of course. But don't tell him I told you this. Don't tell anyone actually, this has to be a secret."<br>"All right, I won't tell anyone,"Andy said.  
>"Promise,"I asked.<br>"Promise,"he said.  
>"Swear?"<br>"Swear."  
>"Okay,"I whispered loudly,"Everyone thinks he's tough, and he is. But he's also sensative. He pretends what Father says and does doesn't hurt him, but it does. It scares him. He's scared, all the time, especially of adults, even though he almost is one. Sometimes..he cries himself to sleep at night. He won't cry in front of our parents. To him, cowering and crying is like losing. And he hates to lose."<br>"I hate to lose too,"Andy said.  
>"Huh,"I asked.<br>"Wrestling,"He said.  
>"Oh,"I replied,"Remember that time you told him he didn't matter?"<br>He nodded regretfully.  
>"He said that it was true,"I said,"That he didn't matter."<br>"I told him I was sorry,"He said,"He said it was fine."  
>"I know,"I said,"I was just thinking. Oh, there's something else."<br>"What ,"He asked.  
>"They don't punish me,"I said, not adding *when John's home*,"When I do something wrong, or the school calls, or I get a detention, they punish John. Our father does the punishing. Our mother just yells at him, mostly. That cigar burn...the one he got for spilling paint. That was me. I spilled it, but John took the blame. Once though...I had to watch John get beat. "Stay here! Watch this b*stard get what he deserves!"<br>"They made you watch,"Andy exclaimed.  
>"Shh,"I demanded,"Keep your voice down! He'll hear you! But yes, they did. Scared the crap out of me. I stopped getting in trouble after that, for the most part. He looked horrible, crumpled up in a ball, getting kicked and hit and screamed at. I wish they would just punish ME when I'm bad, not him."<br>"You wouldn't want to get hit like that,"He said.  
>"I feel horrible when he gets beat,"I said,"Especially when it's my fault. I think he resents me..for not getting hit."<br>"That's not true,"A voice said,"I couldn't stand it if they hit you."  
>I turned around. John stood beside me, wearing his sunglasses. He took them off and put them in his jacket pocket. I smirked.<br>"You heard that, huh,"I asked.  
>"Yeah,"John said, "Sporto...Andy, don't tell anyone, okay."<br>Andy nodded.  
>"I won't,"Andy said.<br>"Good,"John said,"Can't have anyone knowing what a coward I am."  
>I shook my head.<br>"You're not a coward,"I told him.  
>"Damn, Bender,"Andy said,"I didn't know it was this f*cking bad."<br>"I'm used to it by now,"John said,"It doesn't bother me anymore."  
><em><strong>Yes it does. It kills you.<strong>_  
>"You're lying,"Andy said.<br>"What do you care,"John shouted,"I'm just a worthless sh*thead! Nobody cares about me!"

John's POV  
>I don't know why I said that. I just got angry all of the sudden. My moods change randomly sometimes. It's confusing. I closed my eyes and sighed.<br>"Sorry,"I said,"Shit, I didn't mean that."  
>"It's fine,"Andy said.<br>Sammy's brown eyes stared up at me. She hugged me tightly. _**What is WRONG with me? I'm F*CKED UP, that's what's wrong with me.**_


	4. The Incident

We said goodbye to Andy and walked home. Sammy went to her room. I tried to follow, but was stopped. Father grabbed my arm and knocked me over the head with a bottle. I fell limp and my vision went blurry. He dropped me and kicked me in the head and back a few times. The last kick to the head knocked me out.

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV  
>I was waiting in my room for John, when I heard a crash. I figured he'd been knocked out, and I'd just have to wait here untill Father passed out and John woke up. Suddenly, Father walked in the door.<br>"You're mother left today,"He said,"I don't have a bitch anymore...You'll be my little bitch!"  
>"John,"I screamed.<br>He grabbed my neck and shoved me against a wall.  
>"He won't save you,"Father shouted,"He doesn't give a sh*t about you!"<br>I screamed. He threw me to the ground and punched me. He was holding me down, punching me as I tried to yell for help and escape.  
>"John,"I yelled again,"John!Help!"<p>

John's POV  
>I woke to my sister screaming. He was beating her now? I ran to her room. What I saw almost made me vomit. I ran to Father and shoved him off Sammy.<br>"Get away from her,"I screamed, "Sick bastard!"  
>He ran after me. I punched him. He wobbled back and came at me again. I punched him harder and he fell on the ground, passed out drunk. Sammy lay on the ground, half-naked and face covered in blood, now dripping down her neck. I noticed something else though, Bruises and lash scars. There was no way, no friggen way these were new. I brought her a clean pair of clothes.<br>"I can't change,"She looked at Father,"Not in here."  
>I nodded.<br>"You can change in the bathroom,"I said,"I'll stand guard outside the door. You can clean up too. You have a lot of blood."  
>"All right,"she said.<br>She went to the bathroom. I stood guard outside the door. When she came out, her face was cleaned up. She would get a black eye, but at least nothing was broken.  
>"What now,"She asked.<br>Father stirred. Sammy gasped.  
>"Come on,"I said,"We're going to a friend's house."<br>She followed me out the door. After walking a few blocks, I stopped. I grabbed her arm, she flinched.  
>"I knew it,"I said,"How long has he..or is it they..been hitting you?"<br>She gave me a look. It was the same look that I gave people when I want to hide my real feelings.  
>"What are you talking about,"She asked plainly.<br>"I saw the bruises,"I said,"And the scars. They can't be from today. Now tell me the truth, how long?"  
>"I don't know exactly,"She said,"When you started staying out late with your friends, when you weren't at home, or maybe passed out. They would be angry, drunk, the usual. I would try to hide under my bed or in my closet during this, but sometimes...I don't make it there in time."<br>_**My worst fear has been realized.**_  
>"I'm sorry,"I said,"I'm a horrible brother."<br>"No,you're a great brother,"She said,"It's not as bad as you think. They don't hit me as much or as hard as they hit you. And they don't yell at me. It's strange, they don't even talk, just hit and kick or throw me."  
>"But you still got hit,"I said.<br>"Don't blame yourself,John,"She said,"I never told you. You couldn't have known. If I had told you, you never would have left the house again."  
>"You're probably right,there,"I said,"Do you really think I'm a great brother?"<br>"The best,"she said.  
>I started walking again, she followed. We stopped at Andy's house. I knocked on the door frantically. Andy answered.<br>"Yeah,"he asked.  
>"We need to stay here tonight,"I said,"If not me, then Sammy."<br>"Why,"He asked.  
>"Our father,"I said,"Tried to attack Sammy."<br>"All right, get in here,"He said.  
>We went inside. I helped Sammy lie on the couch. Andy brought a blanket and pillow. I gave Sammy the pillow and covered her up. Andy pulled me into the kitchen.<br>"What happened to her,"He asked,"Did he hit her?"  
>"Worse,"I said,"I found her half-naked, on the floor, he was lying on her. Her face was bloody."<br>His eyes widened in horror.  
>"I stopped him before it happened,"I said,"He..he had it planned. He knocked me out, so I couldn't defend her. But i woke up..and she was screaming. I knocked him out, then we ran here."<br>"That b*stard,"Andy exclaimed.  
>I nodded.<br>"I found out something else too,"I said.  
>"What's that,"he asked.<br>"They've been hitting her,"I said,"when I was out with my friends or passed out or something. I didn't know untill I saw the bruises and scars earlier. I don't know how long it's been happening, years maybe."  
>"Maybe,"Andy said.<br>"She can't go back,"I said,"Ever."  
>Tears welled in my eyes as I walked to my sister.<em><strong> My poor baby sister. He'd attacked her!<strong>_

Andy's POV  
>Sammy told John and me what happened.<br>"You won't go back there,"John said.  
>"You can't either, John,"She said,"He said I was his...his bitch. If you go back, and I'm not there, he might make you his..."<br>"No,"John said,"I'm stronger than him."  
>"What if he holds a knife to you,"I said,"Or a gun? Or he just knocks you out?"<br>"Stop,"John interrupted, "Fine, I'll stay here."


	5. The Bat

_A week later..._

Sammy was still staying at Andy's. I'd gone home since Mother came back yesterday. Now he had his 'bitch' back. And me, the punching bag. I smoked a ciggaratte in my room,untill someone walked up the stairs and I threw it out the window. Father walked in the room.  
>"Where is she,"He demanded.<br>"Who,"I asked.  
>He punched me.<br>"You know damn well who,"He shouted,"You're damn sister! Where the hell is she?!"  
>"I'm not telling you,"I yelled.<br>He dragged me into the kitchen and grabbed some rope. He tied my hands up.  
>"Jennifer,"He shouted,"Get in here! And bring the bat!"<br>Jennifer was Mother's name. She walked in and handed him an aluminum baseball bat.  
>"You know what this sick bastard tried to do to our daughter while you were gone,"Father shouted, "He tried to rape her! I stopped him, and he knocked me out!"<br>"F*cking liar,"I shouted,"That was you!"  
>"I always knew you were a piece of sh*t,"Mother yelled,"Kill him!"<br>Father knocked me on the ground and continued to hit me with the bat. I'd been hit with the bat before, but this was the worst. The worst beating ever actually. I lost track of time._** How long has it been? Hours? Days? Weeks? Did my ribs just break? Why can't I breathe? Why can't I feel anything? Am I dead? Dying?**_I opened my eyes. It was light outside before, now it was dark. I stood up slowly, very slowly. It hurts to move. It hurts to breathe. It hurts to think. Breath was like a knife to my lungs. I couldn't get my hands untied, but the front door was already open, so I pushed through it. I barely got outside when I threw up on the grass. It was red, bloody. _**Well, that can't be good**_.

Andy's POV  
>John hadn't come back at all yesterday. [And it was the next day, 8 pm] Sammy convinced me to go look for him. She wanted to come, but I told her to stay because it was dangerous. As I got closer to his house, I saw someone throw up. I ran near the person. It was John. His face, and the rest of his visible body were covered in bruises and dried blood. He walked near me. <em><strong>Is he a zombie?<strong>_  
>"Untie me,"He said, and turned around.<br>I untied the rope from his hands and dropped it on the ground. He leaned against me as I helped him to my house. I lied him down on the couch. Sammy rushed to his side. My parents walked in the room and gasped in shock.  
>"What happened to him,"My father asked.<br>"He...he tried to kill me,"John mumbled.  
>"Who,"My mother asked.<br>"Can't say..."John mumbled again.  
>My mother sighed.<br>"Fine,"She said,"I'll drive you to the hospital."  
>We rushed John to the hospital. He faded in and out of consciousness on the way there. When we got in, they put John on a carrier.<br>"What happened to him,"One of the nurses asked.

We were silent. They gave up asking and wheeled John off to another room. Sammy had followed John into the room, we weren't allowed yet. So we sat in the waiting room. I started to feel guilty. Guilty for hating my father. He may be strict, but at least he never beat me to a bloody pulp. I was certain that John's father did this. Not someone on the street or in an alley or something, but at his own home. The one place where a person should feel safe.  
>"Who did this to him,"My father asked,"Do you know?"<br>"I think so,"I said.  
>"Who,"My mother demanded.<br>"I think,"I started,"I think his father did it."  
>The doctor walked in.<br>"John has four broken ribs,"The doctor said,"A broken arm, a sprained ankle, and one of his ribs hit his lung. It didn't puncture, fortunately. He was bleeding a little internally from a ruptured spleen. The bleeding was stopped sister, Samantha, explained that her father had attacked her and was certain it was him who did this. Could this be possible?"  
>"Yes,"I said,"It's happened before. But not as bad."<br>"Did you ever see any evidence of this abuse,"The doctor asked.  
>I nodded.<br>"He showed me a cigar burn once,"I said,"And I saw lashes on his arm about a week ago."


	6. John's Nightmares

John's POV  
>"John,"A voice said.<br>_**He's back! He's going to kill me now.**_ I see Andy's face. _**Help me! Don't just stand there, help me! Don't walk away, come back!**_ I'm all alone. I see father hovering above me, holding something shiny. He brings his arm down and the shiny object disappears. Sammy is fighting him._** No!**_ Now he is hitting her._** No!**__**I have to defend her.**_ But, I cannot get up. I cannot get up because I am dying. I am dying because he has stabbed me.  
>"John,"The voice said louder.<br>My eyes opened. I was in a hospital bed. Why am I here? Then I remembered, the beating. The bat. A sharp pain when I breathed. Sammy stood above me. I smiled at her, glad that the voice I heard had belonged to her.  
>"Sammy,"I said slowly.<br>She smiled. Her eyes were red, she'd been crying.  
>"You're finally awake,"She said.<br>I nodded, slowly and painfully.  
>"You've been crying,"I asked.<br>"I was worried Johnny,"She said,"I thought you were gonna...I didn't think you would make it."  
>"You don't have to worry anymore,"I said,"I'm here now."<br>"You said he tried to kill you,"She said,"Was it.."  
>"Father,"I answered,"He beat me with the bat."<br>She grabbed my hand. I choked back tears. It hurt. The memories hurt.  
>"John,"She said,"Are you okay?"<br>I swallowed more pain.  
>"No,"I said,"No, I am not okay."<br>She tried to hug me. I whimpered in pain. She pulled back.  
>"It's okay, John,"She said,"Nobody's here. You can cry, go ahead."<br>I breathed in, painfully, and held my breath. I wanted to cry, wanted to break down in tears completely. I remembered Father's voice after he beat me:_"You gonna cry, you little bitch!_" I shrugged it off. _**What do I care what he thinks?! But I do, god dammit, why? Why do I care? Why do I care that they hate me? Why do I care they beat me?**_ Besides, I have to be brave. For Sammy. I swallowed the tears and the pain and exhaled loudly.  
>"What happened to your wrists,"Sammy asked.<br>I looked at them. They had rope burns.  
>"He tied my hands up with rope,"I said,"Andy untied it for me."<br>I blinked back tears.  
>"John, if you hold your feelings in,"She said,"You'll explode."<br>I closed my eyes.  
>"I'm fine,"I said,"I'm tired. Good night Sammy. I love you."<br>"Good night John,"She said,"I love you too."

He chases me, I try to run away. I trip and fall. He shoves my head back against the floor. He punches me in the face. I am dizzy. I try to sit up. _**Knock it off! No, don't hit me again!**_ My nose is bleeding. It is broken._** Stop! Stop doing that! Leave me alone! I'm sorry! I won't do it again! Just, please, stop!**_ The blood drips off my face. Sammy is watching, Mother holding her still._** Look away! Don't see my weakness, my cowardice!**_He is kicking me. I fall over on my side. I lie there, cupping my nose, not moving as he kicks me again and again. I want to fight back, to show how strong of an older brother I was. _**You're not brave, you're weak! Hit me all you want, but don't make her watch! Please! She'll know I'm weak.**_ He kicks me in the back one more time and walks away. _**B*stard!**_ Mother releases Sammy and she runs to me. _**You no good f*cking excuse for a brother! What a great f*cking role model you are!**_ I begin to wonder if she knows what a horrible brother I am. Sammy crouches by me, crying, and helps me up. I start to cry._** Now you're crying! You worthless piece of sh*t!**_ She helps me to her room. She gives me some tissues to put in my nose. "It's okay, John,"She assures me,"They won't find you in here. Calm down, please. You're scaring me."_** You're scaring your sister, Dipsh*t! You're useless as a son and an older brother! **_**Shut up! Don't you think I know that already! He f*cking beat it into me.**_** You deserve it.**_** For what?** I already know why. _**For existing.**_

I opened my eyes. Sammy fell asleep on the chair next to the bed. Andrew was in the chair at the other side of the room. He walked over to me.  
>"Feel better,"He asked.<br>"I guess,"I said,"When did you get in here?"  
>"After my parents left,"He said,"They were getting tired, but they let me stay. They'll be back tomorrow. They're worried, about you and Sammy."<br>"Oh,"I said,"Really?"  
>He nodded.<br>Worried? About me?

Andy's POV  
>John looked directly at me.<br>"I can't take it anymore,"He said.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>"It's all my fault,"He said,"I deserve it all. I'm a coward. I'm a sh*tty older brother, and a useless son. A poor excuse for a person."  
>Tears rolled down his face. I pretended not to notice.<br>"Did your father do this,"I asked.  
>He nodded.<br>"He said I tried to rape Sammy,"He said,"But I didn't. I would never do something like that. It was him. You believe me, don't you?"  
>"Of course,"I said.<br>"He won't leave me alone,"He said,"Even in my dreams. I can't sleep. I'm scared. I never admit it, but I'm scared."  
>"Being scared doesn't make you a bad person,"I said.<br>"Maybe not,"He said,"But I couldn't protect my sister. She still got hurt."  
>"But you did protect her,"I said,"You saved her."<br>"Yeah,"He said,"Once."  
>"But you saved her,"I said,"If that would've happened, it would've killed her. You got her out of there."<br>"I guess so,"He said.  
>"I'm not supposed to tell you this,"I started,"But my parents want you and Sammy to stay with us. At least untill you graduate and get enough money for an apartment or something."<p>

John's POV  
>I looked at him suspiciously. This has to be a trick, a trap.<br>"It's not a trick, John,"Andy said,"It's for real. No one will hurt you, or Sammy. I swear."  
>Lies. They're all the same, all adults. Maybe they're not as bad as my parents, but most of them are. The ones I've met, anyway. I don't trust them, any of them.<br>"I know,"I said.  
>"You should try to get some sleep,"He said,"You need rest."<br>I nodded and closed my eyes. I didn't go to sleep, though. I heard Sammy wake up and start talking to Andy.  
>"Of course he thinks it's a trap,"Sammy said to Andy,"He doesn't trust people."<br>"Yeah,I figured that,"Andy said.  
>"He thinks it's his fault, doesn't he?"<br>"Yeah. He's upset because he didn't protect you."  
>"But he did."<br>"I know. That's what I told him. I don't think he believes me, though."  
>"He always thinks he's a coward. But he's not, he's brave. He defends people, like me. "<br>Andy brought up the detention when the Breakfast Club first met, just over a month ago.  
>"I guess he is pretty courageous,"Andy laughed,"Taking the fall for all of us. And distracting Vernon."<br>"He's a great older brother. When I saw him earlier, I thought he was...dead. I would lose it if he was dead. But he survived. I'm proud of John, for surviving all this."  
>"I'm proud of you too sis,"I said.<br>"You're supposed to be asleep,"Andy said.  
>"You can't tell me what to do,"I said.<p>

I laughed. It was about three in the morning. I slept, mostly without nightmares, for the rest of the night.


	7. The Breakfast Club

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV  
><strong>Flashback..<strong>  
><strong>It was last Christmas. I stood on the top step, waiting for John to wake up.<strong>  
><strong>"Johnny,get down here,"Father yelled from down the stairs.<strong>  
><strong>John came out of his room, hypnoticly walking down the steps. Father grabbed him by the shirt. Johnny's eyes widened a little in fear. Father handed him a pack of ciggarattes.<strong>  
><strong>"Here, smoke up Johnny,"Father said, and let John go.<strong>  
><strong>John sighed and walked back to his room. I followed him.<strong>  
><strong>"He didn't hit you,"I said.<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah,"He laughed,"Friggen Christmas Miracle, right?"<strong>  
><strong>"I guess,"I said.<strong>  
><strong>I pointed to his cigarettes. <strong>  
><strong>"I know it's your present,"I said,"But, can I have some?"<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah,sure,"He said.<strong>  
><strong>He opened the pack and gave me about half. I went to my room and put them in my cigar box that I kept hidden in the drawer beside my bed.<strong>  
><strong>John went out that night. It was cold, but he had a jacket. He didn't get back untill late. Good thing too, or he would have heard me scream. And I screamed loudly, too. It's hard not to when someone is belting you in the side. Lucky John. He gets a pack of cigarattes, and what do I get? One long bloody lash to the side that looked like it needed stitches, surrounded by much smaller, but still painfull, swollen lashes.<strong>  
><em>Present...<em>  
>I was recalling this story to the Breakfast Club before John woke up. Andrew, Claire, Brian, and Allison. Andy called them this morning. Andy introduced me to them when they arrived. Allison, a girl who wore mostly black, was Andy's girlfriend. I'd seen her before, even talked to her a few times. Me, a freshman, talking to a senior. Claire was John's girlfriend. I already knew about her. John talks about her all the time. Brian was the nerdy one, the brain, as Andy described. Allison returned John's switchblade.<br>"I took it when John stuck it in the table,"Allison, who was holding Andy's hand,said,"Sorry."  
>"It's fine,"I said,"I steal shit all the time he'll like having this back. "<br>"How is he,"Claire asked.  
>"He's alive, if that's what you mean,"I said,"It was pretty brutal. The beating, I mean."<br>Claire looked worried. They all did, but Claire looked the worst.  
>"Come on,"I said,"Let's go see him. Visiting hours have started."<br>We entered John's room.  
>"I didn't know that he.."Brian started.<br>"Had a sister,"I finished,"Of course not. No one does."  
>John had woken up. He tried his best to sit up, but couldn't. Claire stood by him and grabbed his hand.<br>"John,"Claire said, looking close to tears.  
>"Hey Claire,"John said.<br>"Your father did this,"Brian said in shock.  
>John nodded.<br>"Once the internal bleeding stopped..,"John said.  
>"Internal bleeding,"Claire exclaimed.<br>"He used a bat,"I said,"Our father tried to kill him actually."  
>I grabbed John's other hand. His body was a dark and bruised purple. He should'nt have gone back. Poor John.<br>I kissed his forehead and sat on a chair across the room. Andy was talking to John and Claire. Allison was standing by him, leaning on his shoulder. He had his arm around her. Damn, he's got big muscles! Brian sat next to me.  
>"It's not fair,"I said quietly,"John is innocent. He did nothing wrong."<br>"I know,"he said.  
>"By the way,"I started,"How old are you?"<br>"I just turned sixteen,"He said.  
>"But you're a senior,"I asked.<br>He laughed.  
>"I skipped seventh grade,"he said,"And ninth grade."<br>"Nice,"I said,"I wish I was that smart. I can't even get a C in Trigonometry."  
>"They let you in Trig as a freshman,"He asked.<br>"Special request,"I said,"I got to take a placement test. Next year, I take pre-calculus."  
>"Wow, you must be smart,"He said.<br>"Not really,"I said,"I'm just good at math..and English...and science. It's just really easy."  
>He smiled.<br>"I'm also good at first aid,"I said.  
>"Oh?"<br>"Yeah,"I said,"I know how to stop bleeding pretty well. And how to treat a broken limb, and a concussion, and fix a shoulder when it's popped out of place."  
>"How'd you learn that,"He asked.<br>"John,"I said,"He's my older brother, but I end up treating his wounds a lot of times Father beats him."  
>"Father?"<br>"We don't call them mom and dad,"I said,"John and I call them Mother and Father. To keep our distance."  
>He nodded.<br>"You wanna hear a joke,"I asked.  
>"Sure."<br>"Okay,"I started," Dear algebra, please stop asking me to look for your X, she's not coming back, and don't ask Y."  
>He burst out in laughter. I followed. Andrew turned to us.<br>"What're you two laughing about,"Andy asked.  
>"Oh nothing,"I said,"You wouldn't understand. You have to be smart to get the joke."<br>Brian and I burst out laughing again.  
>"What is it,"Allison asked.<br>I repeated the joke. Allison giggled. Andrew looked confused.  
>"I told you you wouldn't get it,"I said.<br>Brian and I laughed again. Allison joined in. Then John, and Claire. And finally Andy.  
>"We shouldn't laugh so much,"John said,"They'll put us in the nut house."<br>This only made us laugh harder. Eventually, though, Brian and I were the only ones still laughing. Claire, John, Andy, and Allison were all talking to each other.  
>"Where'd you get that joke,"Brian asked.<br>"Someone wrote it on the chalkboard in math one day,"I said,"They didn't get in trouble, though. The teacher was laughing too hard."  
>Brian and I continued to talk. We talked about important things. Asking ecclesiastical questions such as: If you had one green eye and one blue eye, what would you put on your drivers liscense? What if you were bald? Do Siamese twins date one person, or two?<br>The doctor later informed us that Father had been arrested. The police wanted to talk to John and me. They wanted a statement. The cop came over about noon. We were asked to leave the room for a while. The rest of the Breakfast Club and I went to waiting room and sat.  
>"He told me his father hit him,"Claire said,"But I didn't know it was this bad."<br>She buried her head in her hands.  
>"Me neither,"Andy said,"To think, I didn't believe him when he told us about his dad."<br>"You couldn't have known,"I assured him,"No one sees him when he gets hit."  
>"Do...do they hit you too,"Brian asked carefully.<br>"Sometimes,"I said. Claire, Andy and Brian all looked at me,"Never as bad as him,though, and not as often. I have marks and bruises too, but not nearly as many. Last Christmas was the worst mark I'd ever gotten. As I told you, John got cigarettes, I got... this"  
>I lifted my shirt slightly on the right side to show a long scar, spanning from the bottom of my ribs to my hip. Claire gasped.<br>"So, when does it happen,"Andy asked.  
>"When John isn't home,"I said," Or knocked out. And I can't hide in my closet or under my bed in time. The last time, when John and I left, John was knocked out. And Father, he told me that mother left, and that I would be his..little..bitch."<br>I buried my head in my hands and began to cry. Someone sat next to me.  
>"It's okay,"Brian's voice,"Your father's gone. He's going to jail."<br>I started to shake. I couldn't hold my body up anymore. I started to fall off the chair. Brian caught me and helped me back up. I didn't know why, but I hugged him. I don't know why, but I hugged him. I needed someone. I needed John, but he was busy. I let go of Brian.  
>"I'm sorry,"I said.<br>"It's fine,"Brian said.  
>I wiped off my tears and sat up. I put that look on my face, the one that John and I use to hide our emotions.<p>

John's POV  
>A cop walked in. It was time for the statement. He introduced himself as officer Taylor. He asked me if this was the first time Father hit me. <em><strong>No,of course not. He beats me on a daily basis.<strong>_ He asked me if I did anything to provoke my father.  
>"No,"I said,"Not really. About a week before, I punched him a couple times, he passed out."<br>"Why did you punch him,"The officer asked.  
>"He'd knocked me out that day,"I said,"By hitting me with a bottle and kicking me in the head a few times. When I woke up, I heard my sister,Samantha, screaming. I ran into her room, where she was lying on the floor, clothes half ripped off."I almost couldn't continue,"Her face was bloody and he was lying on her. I pulled him off her. That's when he came after me, so I punched him. And he came after me again, so I punched him, he fell, passed out."<br>He wrote something on a notepad and said something about attempted rape. I nodded.  
>"I had to protect her,"I said,"Before she put on new clothes, I noticed scars and bruises on her torso."<br>"And you believe your father left these marks,"He asked.  
>"Yes,"I said,"And our mother too. The marks she has are similar to mine, but there aren't as many."<br>He wanted to know the objects they used to hit me with.  
>"Their own hands,"I started,"A belt, sometimes cigars, a frying pan, bottles, and once..a chair."<br>I closed my eyes.  
>"Is that all you need,"I groaned painfully.<br>"Yes, John,"He said,"Thank you for your help."  
>"Anytime,"I said.<br>He left.

I looked pathetic. A cast on my arm, a wrap around my ankle, and one around my rib cage, and blue and purple bruised and swollen skin. I've never been beaten like this. I've never lost this badly before.  
>Claire walked in the door. She stood by me and held my hand. I was shaking.<br>"John, are you okay,"She asked.  
>"It..it hurts,"I said,"It f*cking hurts."<br>She ran her fingers through my hair.  
>"It's my fault,"I said,"I'm scared."<br>"It's okay John,"she touched my face gently,"Your father won't hurt you again."  
>I blinked back tears. I was still scared. I don't know why, but I was terrified. Just then, Andy, Brian, and Allison walked in.<br>"What are you guys doing in here,"I asked.  
>"The cop's talking to your sister,"Andy said.<br>They were all looking at me._** You lost,**_ they seemed to say._** You pathetic peice of sh*t**_. I'm not pathetic._** Stupid, worthless..**_..Shut up. Stop looking at me.  
>"Stop staring at me,"I said out loud,"I know I look like crap, but stop it."<br>I removed my hand from Claire's and covered my face. They don't want to see me. I closed my eyes, tears fell.  
>"John,"A quiet voice said.<br>I looked up. It was Allison.  
>"It's okay to cry,"She said.<br>I sighed.  
>"The time at detention,"I started,"When I told you a little about my life. It was a watered down version. You've probably figured that out by now. I never told you what happened right after that."<br>"What,"Claire asked.  
>"He whipped me with a belt,"I said,"Really bad. I was about 14. My back looked like it'd been mauled by a bear."<br>They were silent. _**...no good, goddamn free-loading son of a bitch**_. Stop it.  
>"I'm sorry,"I said,"You don't want to hear this. You probably don't care."<br>"If we didn't care, we wouldn't be here,"Andy said.  
>I looked at Brian.<br>"Why are you so quiet,"I asked.  
>"I don't know,"He said,"Even like this, you're kind of intimidating."<br>I snickered. I remembered that Monday after detention. We'd greeted each other. I held hands with Claire in the hallway, Andy holding hands with Allison. We all said hi to Brian, we talked to each other at lunch. We stayed close since then. Maybe they did care.

_**You're not my son.**_. Good!


	8. The Pizza

The Breakfast Club all stayed with me in the room for the rest of the day. Sammy joined us later, after questioning.  
>"He might go to jail,"Sammy said,"In fact, he probably will."<br>"Good,"I said,"That b*stard deserves to rot in jail! After what he did to you!"  
>"He hurt you too,"She said.<p>

Sammy(Samantha)'s POV  
>"Yeah, but I deserved it,"He said,"Every last one of them."<br>"That's not true,"I said,"You didn't deserve it. You're innocent."  
>His eyes seemed to brighten, then dulled.<br>"I'm far from innocent,"He said.  
>"Stop it John,"I demanded,"Stop listening to Father's voice in your head."<br>"It's not.."He started,"I..all right, I'll try."  
>"Good,"I said,then looked at Andy,"When are your parents coming back?"<br>"Pretty soon,"Andy said,"I called them. They're bringing pizza."

At about 2 pm, Andy's parents visited. They had pizza boxes, plates, and napkins. I passed around the plates and napkins. I was closest to the boxes, so I opened one. It was pepperoni. I picked it up and folded it in half.  
>"Pizza taco,"I exclaimed happily, and hovered it above my mouth.<br>"Put that down,"Andy said.  
>"Fine,"I said,"But mark my words! I will have my pizza taco!"<br>I set the pizza down and grabbed a slice for me, one for John, and one for Brian.  
>"You know what we should do,"I asked Brian as I sat by him.<br>"Eat our pizza backwards,"He said,"Crust first?"  
>"That's what I was thinking!"<br>We both turned our pizza around and ate from the crust. Everyone looked at us. We started laughing.  
>"You guys are weird,"John said.<br>"No,"I said,"You guys are the weird ones. You're eating your pizza wrong."  
>We all laughed. Brian and I continued to eat the rest of our pizza slices backwards.<p>

I enjoyed having a friend. At least for now.


	9. The Offer

Allison's POV  
>We had finished eating our pizza and we all threw our trash away in the trashcan inside the room. There was a large trashcan at the end of the hallway to put the pizza boxes in. Andy and I volunteered to throw the pizza boxes away. After we threw them away, I stopped him in the hallway.<br>"Andy, I need to talk to you,"I said.  
>"What's up,"He asked.<br>"I know what John's going through,"I said,"Well..sort of."  
>I looked closely at Andy. I was shaking internally a little. I grabbed his hands and held them, just in case.<br>"What do you mean,"He asked.  
>"I know what it's like to be hit,"I told him.<br>"Your parents,"He asked.  
>"No,"I said,"I had a boyfriend once. I was young, maybe 15. This guy, I won't mention his name, was maybe 18 at the time. He looked a little like John, a tough guy, but he had muscles, like you. I only dated him for a little while, about a semester, then he moved away. Anyways, he hit me sometimes. Not like John gets hit, but like slaps to the face. I'd hit him back sometimes, and it made him angrier."<br>I'd almost forgotten about that bastard. Andy's eyes widened.  
>"Why didn't you tell me before,"He asked.<br>"What's to tell,"I said,"It wasn't that bad. He never sent me to a hospital or anything."  
>He touched my face. I flinched.<br>"Are you scared,"He asked.  
>"Of what,"I demanded through clenched teeth.<br>"Someone hurting you again,"He said.  
>"I was never scared,"I lied.<br>"Yes you are,"He's good at knowing when people are lying,"Otherwise, you wouldn't have flinched."  
>"I didn't mean to,"I said,"It's just that, remembering him... He was a real f*cking jerk."<br>"Yeah,"He said.  
>I hugged him tightly.<br>"I haven't dated anyone since then,"I said,"I didn't get close to anyone. I was nervous about you at first, but now..now I trust you."  
>"Come on, don't cry,"He said,"You'll be okay."<br>He kissed me. I wiped off my tears.  
>"Let's go back in the room,"I said.<p>

Claire's POV  
>I looked at John as I stood by him. He looked a lot better with a smile on his face. His father is a bastard, a no-good scumbag. Beating John like that, accusing him of attacking his sister. I knew nothing about his life. I thought I did, I knew his father hit him, but I had no idea it was this bad. I felt bad for John, not out of pity, but out of love. I love John. My parents like him too, even though he's not rich like us. I didn't know anything about him, I didn't even know he had a sister until we came here.<br>"Why didn't you tell me you had a sister,"I asked.  
>"I don't know,"John answered,"I guess I wanted to protect her reputation. If people know I'm her brother, they'd treat her differently, like a criminal. I've told a few people, though."<br>"Who,"I asked.  
>"Her cheating ex,"He said,"For one."<br>I was about to say something else, when Allison and Andy walked back in. They were a great couple, mismatched, like me and John, but a great couple, nonetheless.  
>"John,"Allison said,"I need to tell you something."<br>"Go ahead,"John said.  
>Andy held Allison's hand as she told us about her ex-boyfriend and how Andy was the first boyfriend she'd had after that.<br>"Don't worry about Andy,"John joked,"He may be brainless, but he doesn't hit girls."  
>"Not completely brainless, anyways,"I smiled and joked.<br>All of us laughed, except Allison, who tried to contain her laughter at the expense of her boyfriend, but could not. She burst into giggles.  
>I grabbed John's hand, feeling security in knowing John would never hurt me. I don't know how I knew, I just did. I knew Andy would never hurt Allison. Andy's dated plenty of girls, none of which he was violent with. Besides that, Allison was special to him. It's like they were meant to be together, like they were soul mates. I felt that way about John too. Like we were sides of a magnet, drawn together.<br>John would never become like his parents. The rest of us might, but he never will. He won't become a drunk who beats his wife and kids.

Brian's POV  
>After getting over the shock from the mini-bombshell Allison had just dropped, I continued to talk to Sammy. I looked more closely at her. Her long brown hair flowed down past her shoulders, her long bangs almost covering her dark brown eyes. Her skin was a little pale, she was probably scared or nervous, and she was thin and tall. She was beautiful. Not hot, I don't usually think of girls as hot, they're not radiators. Her beauty kind of shimmered from her, on the inside and outside. She was strong, too. Strong-willed, definitely, and maybe strong physically too. And she's smart. I know it's crazy though, I've only just met her. Besides, she'd never want to date a nerd like me. You know what, screw it, I'm gonna ask her anyways.<br>"You wanna hang out sometime,"I asked,"Like, outside of the hospital?"  
>"Sure,"Sammy said, and grabbed a paper and pen.<br>She wrote something down and handed it to me. It had a number and her name on it.  
>"It's the number for Andy's house,"She said,then whispered,"We're going to be staying there after John gets out."<br>What she did then, shocked me. She got up and kissed my cheek. She shaped her hand like a phone and mouthed "call me". She sat back down a couple seats from me. Andy, Claire, John,and Allison were all looking at me. I was blushing.  
>"Hey bri,"John said.<br>"Yeah,"I asked.  
>"Get over here,"John said.<br>I walked over by him.  
>"Hey,"I said,"She kissed me."<br>"I know,"He said,"Listen. My sister has been through a lot. She's been hurt, badly. I don't want her to get hurt again, got it?"  
>I nodded.<br>"Good,"He said,"Take good care of her, okay?"  
>I smiled.<br>"I will,"I said.

Andy's POV

I was talking to my parents out in the hall for privacy.

"I didn't mean to tell him,"I said,"It kind of just slipped out. Sorry."  
>"That's fine,"My mother said,"What did they think about it?"<br>"Sammy wants to stay,"I said,"But John, he's skeptical. He thinks its a trick or something."  
>"How come,"My father asked.<br>"He doesn't trust people,"I said,"Especially adults."  
>"That's understandable,"My mother said,"With what he's been through."<br>I nodded. We walked back inside the room.  
>"Excuse me everyone,"My mother said, and when everyone looked,said,"Claire, Brian, Allison, we would like to speak to John and Sammy. If you will excuse us.."<br>"Of course,"Claire said.  
>And with that, the three(Claire, Allison, and Brian) stepped out into the hallway.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>Why did I do that? What got into me? What the hell was I thinking? Thinking a senior, a smart one like that, would like me, a freshman. No way. No way he likes me.<br>"Samantha, John,"Andy's mother addressed us,"Andy has already told you this, but my husband and I are willing to let you two stay at our house for a while. At least untill you and John get old enough and get enough money to move out."  
>"So,"Andy started,"Do you guys want to stay?"<br>I nodded.  
>"Of course,"I said.<br>"John...,"Andy's mother asked.  
>"Huh,"John asked.<br>"Do you want to stay John,"I asked.  
>"Umm..."<p>

Brian's POV  
>"What do you think they're talking about,"Claire asked.<br>"She gave me her number,"I said.  
>Allison smirked.<br>"What for,"Claire asked.  
>"To hang out,"I said,"Outside of the hospital. It's Andy's number. She said they were staying at Andy's after they got out."<br>"So..,"Allison started.  
>"Maybe they're going to live there a while,"I said,"Or something. Because John isn't old enough to buy a house or rent an apartment."<br>"Yeah,"Claire said,"And John's not old enough to have legal custody of Sammy."  
>I looked at the slip of paper in her pocket and smirked. Her number. She gave me her number.<br>"I think someone has a crush on you Bri,"Claire said.  
>"Nah,"I said,"She's just messing with me. This number probably isn't real."<br>Allison took the number, looked at it, then handed it back.  
>"It's real,"She said,"That's Andy's number."<br>I put the paper in my pocket and smiled.  
>"Do you like her, Bri,"Claire asked.<br>"Yeah."

John's POV  
>"Umm...,"I said.<br>_**Was it a trap?**_Andy told me it wasn't a trick or a trap. Why do they want me and Sammy? Pity? To keep us as servants? We'd have to do everything they told us, or they'd kick us out. What would they want us to DO? I hope it's not anything_ dirty_. I shivered. I closed my eyes. I could imagine Andy's parents forcing us to clean the house from top to bottom until it was sparkling clean. I could imagine them hitting us. I could imagine Andy watching as they beat me or Sammy, laughing, saying I deserved it. I didn't want to be a punching bag again, and I definitely didn't want Sammy to be one either.  
>I opened my eyes again. <em><strong>They can't be that evil! can they?<strong>_  
>"It's okay, John,"Andy's mother said,"You need time to decide. We understand."<br>They turned toward the door to tell the others to come back inside. I couldn't move my mouth. I couldn't move at all for a second. Then, finally...  
>"Wait,"I said.<br>They turned around.  
>"Yes,"Andy's mother asked.<br>"I have a question,"I said.  
>"What is it,"Andy's father asked.<br>"You..you won't hurt us,"I asked nervously,"Me or Sammy, will you?"  
>"Of course not,"He said.<br>"Not all adults are bad, John,"Andy's mother said,"We're not going to hurt you. You don't have to worry."  
>I nodded.<br>"I know,"I said,"And...yes."  
>"Yes what,"She asked.<br>"Yes, I would like to stay,"I said.  
>"That's great,"Andy said happily.<br>Sammy hugged me. I yelped in pain and she let go. Each swing of the bat, each hit on my skin, flashed back to me.  
>"Sorry,"She said.<br>"It's okay,"I told her.  
>The three others came back in the room. Sammy and I told them about what happened. They were happy for us. Sammy was happy for us. I was happy for us.<br>Sammy and Brian started to talk to each other again, sitting across the room so no one heard what they were talking about. I wasn't worried. I know Brian will treat her well.  
>Almost everyone went home about 9 that night, leaving me, Sammy, Andy, and his parents.<br>I don't know what will happen when I get out of this hospital in a few days. I don't know how long they will be able to tolerate me before they kick me out or something. I'm scared. I told everyone goodnight and went to sleep.

"You deserved this,"It was Andy's voice,"You shithead!" He is laughing at me. He ties my hands and feet up, laughing evilly._** What are you doing?**_ He is kicking me. He lifts me up and ties me to a chair._** Let me go!**_He makes me look at Sammy. "Look what you did to her,"He exclaims. Sammy walks closer to me, her body covered in blood and bleeding. She takes out a bat and begins to hit me with it. _**Please don't!**_She stops for a second. "You did this,"she exclaims. "No,"I shout. "Look at your hands,"she says. I look at them, they are covered in blood. "How could you,"She exclaims,"I thought you loved me!" She hits me with a bat again. "He loved Claire too,"Andy says,"Then he killed her." "What,"I yell. Andy points to a corner. I look and see Claire, a knife sticking out of her, a pool of blood on the floor surrounding her._** No! I didn't! Why did I keep hurting people!**_"Why,"I ask. "I don't know,"Andy says,"You tell me." He pulls out a switchblade and stabs me. "Ahh,"I shout as I lose consciousness._** All my fault..I deserve this..**_

I open my eyes. Andy is shaking me. My eyes widened in fear.  
>"I..I killed Claire,"I said,"And hurt my sister...her blood..on my hands. And you stabbed me... my fault...I deserve this.."<br>"John,"Andy said,"You were dreaming. There's no blood."  
>I looked down at my hands. Blood free.<br>"It was horrible,"I said,"That dream. So f*cking real."  
>I noticed I'd been shaking.<br>"I'd say so,"Andy said,"You were screaming. You kept shouting 'no' and mumbling something I couldn't understand. I'm surprised you didn't wake anyone else up. What happened, in your dream?"  
>I told him.<br>"That's f*cked up,"He said.  
>"I know,"I said,"Andy, I have a problem."<br>"What's that,"He asked.  
>"I keep hurting people,"I said.<br>"No,"He replied,"People keep hurting you."


	10. Freedom

**This Chapter is quite long, (almost 15 pages) and includes large twists to add to the plot.**

* * *

><p>I got out of the hospital two days later. Sammy and I got our own guest rooms at Andy's house. We'd went to our house to get our stuff, Mother calling us ungrateful brats before the police took her away. She'd started hitting me, then Andy's parents walked in and called the cops.<p>

I lied down on my new bed in the guest room, a full bed, soft and comfortable. Sammy walked in the room. She handed me a switchblade.  
>"Allison said sorry,"She said,"For taking it. I told her you'd like to have it back."<br>It was my old switchblade. I'd forgotten about it.  
>"I just thought I lost it,"I said,"I bought a new one."<br>I pulled my newer blade out of my pocket. It was a black-handled blade. I handed it to her.  
>"I guess you can have this one,"I said,"If you want."<br>She nodded and took it. I took my old one. She sat by me and wrapped her arms around me.  
>"What's that for,"I joked.<br>"You saved us,"She said,"Thank you."  
>"Anytime,"I said.<br>"Do you like your room,"She asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"Nice to have a real bed for once."<br>"Me too,"She said.  
>"Better enjoy it while you can,"I said,"Before we get thrown out on the street."<br>"They won't kick us out, John,"She said.  
>"Maybe not you,"I said,"But they won't want me. No one does."<br>"John,"She said,"What did I tell you?"  
>"Stop listening to Father's words,"I said,"But it's true.."<br>"No John,"She said,"You have to trust them."  
>"I can't,"I said,"They'll hurt me, I just know it."<br>I knew I was being paranoid, but it's hard not to. When you live with getting beat and screamed at everyday.  
>"You trust me,"She said,"Don't you?"<br>"Of course,"I said.  
>"Then, believe me,"She said,"No one will hurt you."<br>I nodded.  
>"Sammy?"<br>"Yeah?"  
>"That time I saved you from our father, was that the only time he.."<br>"Yes."  
>I turned her face to look at me.<br>"Sammy, tell me the truth. Was it the only time?"  
>"Yes."<br>"Don't lie to me."  
>She buried her head in her hands.<br>"Oh my god,"I said,"Shit..shit..shit."  
>"It wasn't like that John,"She said.<br>"Then what was it,"I demanded.  
>"John..please."<br>"Tell me! Did that son of a b*tch rape you?!"  
>She ran off into the hallway. Andy walked in<br>"What happened to her,"Andy asked.  
>"When our father attacked her,"I started,"It wasn't the first time. Shit Andy, I think he raped her."<br>He stared in horror.  
>"Where is she,"I asked.<br>"In the bathroom,"He said.  
>We ran to the bathroom down the hall. I knocked on the door.<br>"Sammy,"I said,"Please open the door."  
>There were a few moments of silence, then she opened the door.<br>"What,"She demanded.  
>"How old were you,"I asked,"When he first did that to you?"<br>"Twelve,"She said.  
>"Shit,"I said,"It's my fault. I'm so sorry for this..."<br>I ran up the stairs, toward Andy's parents' room.

Andy's POV  
>"John, wait,"Sammy screamed,"It was only once!"<br>Sammy and I followed John. We found John in my parents' room, holding the gun they keep in the drawer for protection.  
>"John,"Sammy screamed.<br>"Get out of here Sammy,"John said,"You don't want to see this."  
>"John, what are you doing,"I asked.<br>"I've been a horrible brother.."He said,"A horrible person.."  
>He put the gun in his mouth, tears rolled down his face.<br>"John,"Sammy said,"It wasn't your fault! I'm sorry! I should've told you..but, I was scared."  
>"Get out Sammy,"He repeated.<br>"John,"I said,"If you do this, then your parents win. And you lose. You don't want to lose...do you?"  
>He took the gun out of his mouth. He put it in the drawer and closed it.<br>"No, I don't,"He said.  
>He followed us out of the room.<br>"Don't tell your parents..okay,"He asked.  
>"I won't,"I said,"How'd you know there was a gun in there?"<br>"Our parents have one in their room,"He said.

Sammy's POV  
>John lied on his bed and cried. I sat by him on his bed.<br>"I'm sorry, John,"I said,"I wanted to tell you..."  
>He wiped the tears from his eyes.<br>"Sammy,"He started,"I didn't protect you.."  
>"John,"I said,"I swear, it was only once."<br>"Are you sure?"  
>"Yes, Johnny."<br>He nodded.  
>"I believe you."<br>John sat up. I leaned on him.  
>"It wasn't your fault Sammy,"He said,"None of it. Don't blame yourself."<br>"Wasn't yours either."  
>"I'm sorry you had to see that,"He said,"The gun in my mouth."<br>"I'm just glad you aren't dead,"I said.  
>He smiled.<br>"Glad?"  
>"You think I wanted you dead?"<br>"Sometimes..."  
>"NEVER, John,"I said,"NEVER would I want you dead. I love you,John, so much. You're my brother. My protector."<br>I squeezed him as tightly as possible in a hug. He freed his arms and wrapped them around me just as tightly.  
>"I love you too, Sammy,"He said,"So, so much."<br>"I love you so so so much,"I said.  
>He let go of me. I released him too.<br>"Are we really going to start this,"He joked.  
>I raised an eyebrow.<br>"Hmm..perhaps,"I joked back.  
>He ruffled my hair.<br>"Did you tell the cops,"He asked me.  
>"Huh?"<br>"When they questioned you. Did you tell them about..."  
>"Oh. Hell yes."<br>"That's my sis! Proud of you!"  
>I loved that John was proud of me. I always looked up to him. My protector. My brother.<br>"You too, Johnny!"

Andy's POV  
>The phone rang. I answered it.<br>"Hi Andy,"The person said,"It's Brian. Is..is Sammy there? I wanna talk to her."  
>"Sure,"I said,"Let me get her. Just a sec."<br>"Sammy,"I shouted.  
>"Yeah,"Sammy asked as she stood at the top of the stairs.<br>"You have a phone call."  
>She ran down the stairs, nearly tripping.<br>"Who is it?"  
>"Brian."<br>"Tell him I'm busy."  
>"Why?"<br>"I'm in my pj's."  
>I sighed.<br>"He can't see you through the phone. You know that..right?"  
>"Give me the phone,"She mumbled,"Smartass."<br>I laughed as she took the phone.

Brian's POV  
>"Hey Brian."<br>"Sammy?"  
>"Yeah, that's me. What did you want, Bri?"<br>"Well..I wanted to ask..um.. if you wanted to..uh..hang out..sometime?"  
>"Sure! Where? When?"<br>"I was thinking..um.."  
>"How about the park? A picnic...I could bring sandwiches?"<br>"Y..yeah. Sounds great."  
>"What time?"<br>"Three o'clock? This afternoon."  
>"Sounds great!"<br>"Should I bring something?"  
>"Sodas,"She laughed,"And a pizza taco."<br>"Good one,"I laughed,"I'll bring soda."  
>"Terrific,"She joked,"That pizza taco is rightfully mine."<br>"Yes,"I joked back,"It was wrongfully stolen from you.."  
>She and I laughed.<br>"See you there, Brian."  
>"Yep. See you there."<br>I hung up. I breathed the world's largest sigh of relief, slowing my racing heart down, which I swear was seconds from exploding._** I can't even complete a sentence around Sammy. How will I go on a picnic with her?**_

Sammy's POV  
><em><strong>YES!<strong>_  
>"John,"I shouted and ran to his room.<br>"Yeah, Sammy,"John asked.  
>"Can I go to a picnic with Brian,"I asked,"At three?"<br>"Where,"He asked.  
>"The park."<br>"So, you've got a date."  
>"No! Just two friends hanging out."<br>"Yeah, sure you can go."  
>"One more thing."<br>"What's that?"  
>"I need to make sandwiches."<br>"Ask Andy. I can't make food worth the crap."  
>"Yeah, I know."<br>He smiled.  
>"Just go,"He joked,"Before I change my mind."<br>Andy was standing in the hallway.  
>"Will you help me make sandwiches,"I asked.<br>"For your date,"He asked.  
>"It is NOT a date,"I said,"Just a picnic."<br>"Sure, I'll help,"He said.  
>We went into the kitchen. I opened the loaf of bread and Andy got out lunch-meats and cheese.<br>"What kinds do you want,"Andy asked,referring to meat.  
>"Turkey, ham,"I said,"A variety. Do you have peanut butter and jelly?"<br>"Yeah,"He said, and gave me a jar of peanut butter and grape jelly.  
>"Butter knives,"I said,"We need butter knives."<br>He handed me a butter knife.  
>"Mayo,"He asked.<br>"Nah,"I said.  
>We started making the sandwiches.<br>"How many,"He asked.  
>"Too of each,"I said,"Two ham, two turkey, and two Pb and j."<br>"You used the wrong two."  
>"What?"<br>"I was talking to the author. She used t-o-o instead of t-w-o."  
>"Quit breaking the fourth wall."<br>"Okay, sorry. So, what time is this picnic anyways?"  
>"Three o clock."<br>"We've got an hour and a half."  
>"Good."<br>"Seriously, was that a typo?"  
>"Dammit Andy, knock it off."<br>We fixed the sandwiches with an hour left for me to get ready. I put the sandwiches in baggies and then in a large lunchbox. I set the lunchbox on the counter in the kitchen and went upstairs to my room before Andy could break the fourth wall again.

I put on the nicest shirt and pair of jeans that I could find. I don't like dresses or skirts, nor do I have any. I got out my small makeup kit and started putting some on. I put on foundation, yellow eye-shadow, and some mascara.  
>I peeked my head into John's room.<br>"Hi, John,"I said.  
>"Do I know you,"He joked.<br>"Your sister, Sammy,"I said.  
>He got up and walked to me.<br>"Didn't recognize you,"He said,"I thought you were some 25 year old stranger, coming to kidnap me."  
>"Really,"I asked,"25?"<br>"Oh, definitely,"He said.  
>"So..I look good then,"I asked.<br>"You look great sis,"He said.  
>He followed me down the stairs and back into the kitchen.<br>"Geez,"Andy exclaimed,"It took you thirty minutes to get dressed!"  
>"Yeah, so,"I said,"Do I look good, Andy?"<br>"Yeah, you look terrific,"He said.  
>I blushed a little. Having my old crush saying I looked great...<br>"Thank you,"I said.  
>"Better get going sis,"John said.<br>"I have a half hour,"I said.  
>"The park's fifteen minutes away,"Andy said.<br>"All right, I'd better go then,"I said,"Bye John. See ya Andy."  
>I hugged John and waved to Andy.<br>"Andy, take care of John,"I said,"And tell your parents where I am, okay? And John, I love you."  
>"I love you too,sis,"John said.<br>I took the lunchbox and started out the door.  
>"Have fun on your date,"John shouted.<br>"IT IS NOT A DATE!"

Brian's POV  
>I was already at the park by two-thirty. I only lived a couple blocks from the park. I'd brought the Soda's and was waiting at a picnic table. I had also brought a bag of chips and some cookies. I read a book as I waited for Sammy to get here.<br>"What're you reading,"Someone asked.  
>"Its called 'Carrie' by Stephen King,"I said, and set the book down.<br>"Hi Brian,"It was Sammy.  
>She looked amazing. Her long curly hair flowing from her head. Her glowing smile, enhanced by the makeup on her face. Her eyes, brown, standing out even more than before from the eye-shadow. I smiled at her.<br>"Hi, Sammy,"I said.  
>She set a lunchbox on the table. She sat down across from me and took out six sandwiches. I handed her a soda and took one for myself.<br>"Strawberry soda,"She asked.  
>"Don't like it?"<br>"I love strawberry soda!"  
>"Me too! What kind of sandwiches did you make?<br>"Ham, turkey, and Pb and j."  
>"On the SAME sandwich,"I joked.<br>She giggled.  
>"No, two of each. I labeled them."<br>She took a turkey, and I took a Pb&j.  
>"These are good,"I said,"Did you make them?"<br>"Andy helped."  
>"Guess what else I brought."<br>"What?"  
>I handed her the bag of chips and the cookies.<br>"What kind are they?"  
>"Sugar cookies,"I said,"They're sweet, like you."<br>I put my head in my hand. Why did I say that? I stayed like that untill she sat right next to me.  
>"Brian,"She said,"Eat your cookie."<br>She was smiling.  
>"What exactly did you put in those sandwiches,"I joked.<br>"Oh, the usual,"She joked back,"Peanut butter, rat poison, arsenic, jelly.."  
>"What was that last thing?"<br>"Jelly?"  
>"Yeah. That must be it."<br>"Try the turkey next,"She joked,"It doesn't have jelly."  
>"You know, you can really taste the arsenic."<br>"Thank you."  
>I expected her to go back to the other side of the table, but she stayed.<br>After finishing our food, we sat and talked for a while.  
>"I like that book,"She said first,"It's one of my favorites."<br>"Really?"  
>"Yeah. It's interesting."<br>"What part is most interesting?"  
>"I don't know. Just telekinesis in general. It's fascinating. To be able to control objects with your mind. That's a lot of power, you know?"<br>"Yeah. What would you do with that kind of power?"  
>"Make people's heads explode,"She joked.<br>She started staring at my head.  
>"It won't work,"I joked.<br>"Shh..I'm concentrating."  
>We started to laugh again, like we did at the hospital. She looked into my eyes.<br>"You look great Brian,"She said.  
>"You look beautiful,Sammy,"I slipped,"I mean.. pretty..you look pretty."<br>She grabbed the back of my head and kissed me on the lips, hard. This lasted a few seconds, then she let go.  
>"Sammy?"<br>"I'm sorry Brian. I..I have to go."  
>"Sammy..wait."<br>She took the two remaining sandwiches and her cookie and put it in the lunchbox.  
>"I had fun, Brian. I'll..I'll see you."<br>She ran off.  
>"Sammy, wait!"<br>_**I like you too, Sammy**_. I sighed. _**I really f*cked that up!**_

Sammy's POV  
>I couldn't go home yet. I had to wait for these tears to wear off.<em><strong> I f*ck*d that up! What the hell was I thinking?! I wasn't thinking! kissing him?! I just ruined a great friendship.<strong>_  
>After walking around the block, I finally was able to go to the house. Andy sat on the couch, watching tv.<br>"My parents are home from work,"He said,"They're in their room."  
>"Oh,"I sat on the couch and sighed.<br>"What's wrong,"He asked.  
>"It's Brian,"I said.<br>"Did you two have a fight,"He asked.  
>"No,"I said.<br>"Then what happened?"  
>"I think I ruined our friendship."<br>"What'd you do?"  
>"I KISSED him."<br>"It's okay. I think he likes you anyways."  
>"Like, like like?"<br>"Like like."  
>"Doubt it."<br>"I think he does."  
>"Last guy I went out with cheated on me cause I wouldn't put out. Friggen hate that guy!"<br>"Hey, Brian's a virgin too. He told us at detention."  
>I sighed.<br>"I'm not a virgin Andy."  
>He looked at me intently.<br>"You mean...?"  
>"It was stolen from me, Andy."<br>"So your father did.."  
>"Yes. It was about three years ago...I was twelve..maybe thirteen.."<br>"You don't have to tell me.."  
>"Yeah..I know."<br>I went up to the room that was for me, and wiped off my makeup. I put on my pajamas, since I figured I wasn't going anywhere for the rest of the day.  
>"Sammy,"John shouted,<em><strong>god, he sounded so much like father<strong>_,"Come here."

**Flashback..**  
><strong>"Samantha, I need to talk to you,"Father shouted from his room,"Come here, Sammy. I just want to talk."<strong>  
><strong>I felt glad that our parents were paying me some attention. Maybe they wanted to make it up to me. I walked toward the room. I immediatly regretted it once I saw the devious look on Father's face.<strong>  
><strong>...<strong>

**...**

**...**

**..**

**.**

**Blood. Running down my legs, all over my clothes. How will I explain this to John? I know! **  
><strong>I walked to John's room and knocked on his door. He answered.<strong>  
><strong>"What happened to you,"He asked.<strong>  
><strong>"I think I started..um,"I said,"You know that thing girls get..um.."<strong>  
><strong>"Oh,"He said,"I'll go buy you some..uh.."<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah,"I said,"Thanks."<strong>  
><strong>"For now,"He said,"Get in the shower. And trash those clothes. I'll get you some new ones."<strong>  
><strong>He went in my room and brought out a fresh pair of clothes.<strong>  
><strong>"Thank you, John,"I said.<strong>  
><strong>"Yep,"He said,"I'll be right back."<strong>  
><strong>I got into the shower. It hurt a little to walk. My whole body was shaking. I collapsed in the shower, hugging my knees, and sobbing. John found me later, and I blamed it on hormones.<strong>  
><strong><em>I'm sorry for lying to you,John.<em>**

_present..._  
>I came out of the room.<br>"What do you want,"I asked.  
>"Andy's parents want to talk to us,"John said,"They need to tell us something important."<br>"Okay,"I said, and followed him to the living room.  
>"What's this about,"John asked.<br>"Your parents,"Andy's mother said,"Both of them are in jail."  
>"For how long,"John asked.<br>"Your mother got five years in jail,"Andy's father said,"For child abuse."  
>"And our father,"I asked.<br>"Thirty years. Charged with attempted murder, child abuse, rape of a minor, and attempted rape."  
>"Good,"John spat.<br>"John,"I said excitedly,"You know what that means?"  
>"What?"<br>"We're free,"I said,"We're finally free."  
>"We..we are?"<br>"They can't hurt us anymore,John."

John's POV  
>I'd like to say that the first thing I did was scream with joy and have a party when I realized our parents were in jail. But that, would be a lie. What I really did, was drop to my knees, bury my head in my hands and sob. Sammy helped me up to my room, where I collapsed on my bed and proceeded to sob uncontrollably. The more I tried to stop it, the harder I cried. I'd finally lost control. I did stop after a while, though.<br>"You were right, Sammy,"I said.  
>"About what?"<br>"When you said that I'd explode if I held my feelings in,"I said,"Well, you were right. I exploded."  
>"Yeah,but you're alive,"She said,"And I'm glad."<br>"Yeah,me too."  
>She wrapped her arms around me tightly, like earlier.<br>"So,"I started,"We're free?"  
>"Yep. It's finally over, Johnny."<br>_**It IS over. We ARE free now.**_ I smiled, enjoying freedom.


	11. John's Nightmares Part 2

They are making Sammy and I clean the kitchen. "I want to see my reflection on the surface,"Andy's father says,"Clean the floor and the tables. You have an hour. Do it right, or else." "we..we cleaned it yesterday,"Sammy says._** Please be quiet, you don't want to get punished.**_Sammy yelps as Andy's father grabs her hair and slams her head into the table. Blood spills from her nose onto the table and floor. "Does that look clean to you,"He demands. "Leave her alone,"I demand. He stomps over to me. "What'd you say to me,"He demands. "Leave. Her. Alone.,"I repeat. He punches me. He tosses me across the room and stomps on my back. He kicks my head a few times. I won't be getting up, or moving, for a while. "Now it's thirty minutes,"He says, and leaves the room. Sammy helps me up. "Hurry up, John,"She says,sounding terrified,"We don't have much time. I don't want you getting in trouble." She touched the scar on my neck, a knife mark. From not finishing my chores in time. I sighed._** They will literally KILL us.**_

I opened my eyes to complete darkness. I was in my bed. I removed the thick blanket from my body and stood up slowly. I went downstairs and sat on the couch in the living room. I was shaking, near to bursting into tears. I heard footsteps come down the stairs. Finding no other hiding place, I crouched behind the couch, covering my face. I kept still, trying not to breathe too heavily.  
>"That's a terrible hiding spot,John,"A voice said,"If you really want to hide, use the closet."<br>I looked up. Andy's father.  
>"What's wrong,John,"He asked.<br>"Well sir.."I started.  
>"Please, call me Rick,"He said.<br>"Well, Rick,"I said,"I had a bad dream."  
>"That explains why you're so pale,"Rick said,"And why you're shaking. But why did you hide?"<br>"I heard footsteps,"I said,"And I got scared. Habit, I guess."  
>"Come on, get up John,"He said.<br>He put out his hand to help me up. I flinched.  
>"I won't hurt you,"He said.<br>I let him help me up.  
>"No one will hurt you John,"He said.<br>"I..I know,"I said.  
>"Do you, John,"He asked.<br>"Huh,"I asked.  
>"Do you trust us,"He asked.<br>I just looked at him._** Another trap.**_  
>"It's all right John,"He said,"You can talk to me."<p>

Rick's POV  
>John was still pale white, ghostly. He was slightly shaking. He looked that dream was, it terrified him. He stood tall, trying to hide the fear.<br>"I didn't mean to sneak up on you,"I said,"I'm sorry."  
>"It's not that,"John said,"I'm just..a little.."<br>"Scared?"  
>He nodded.<br>"What was your dream about,"I asked carefully.  
>"I...I can't,"He said,"I...just..can't.."<br>He turned and ran up the stairs like his life depended on it. I sighed and walked back to the master bedroom. I sat on the bed.  
>"Kim,"I said to my wife,"Kimberly, please wake up. I need to talk to you."<br>Kim rolled over groggily.  
>"Yes dear,"She asked, then looked at the clock,"It's three in the morning, what do you want?"<br>"It's John,"I said.  
>She looked concerned as I turned on the desk lamp.<br>"What happened,"She asked.  
>"He's scared,"I said,"He was in the living room, and he was pale and terrified."<br>"But, his parents are in jail,"She said,"They won't come back."  
>"It's not that,"I said,"I think..he's scared of..us."<br>"He has trust issues, Rick,"She said,"I think his sister might too."  
>"I can't imagine what they've been through,"I said.<br>"Andrew told me something today,"She said,"Right before he went to bed."  
>She told me about John trying to kill himself, and Sammy talking about getting raped.<br>"My god,"I said.  
>"Maybe he needs therapy,"She said,"And Samantha too."<br>"Maybe,"I said,"What did you do with the gun?"  
>"I put it in the safe,"She said.<p>

John's POV  
>I ran to my closet in my room and hid there. I came out and lied on my bed when I was sure that no one was coming after me. I finally stopped shaking, but I was crying now. I let myself cry a little. I thought of Claire. What would she think if she saw me cry? <em><strong>She hates you!<strong>_ No, she doesn't. I love her. I haven't hurt her, couldn't hurt her._** You're gonna be like your father! An alcoholic scumbag!**_ I won't hurt her. I won't hurt my children, if I have any.

I closed my eyes, letting the nightmares take me once again.


	12. Brian

Brian's POV  
>Why is she ignoring me? It's been a week since the picnic when Sammy kissed me. I've called her three times since then, just to talk, and every time she'd told me she was busy and hung up the phone.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"Sammy,"John said.<br>"Yeah,"I asked.  
>"Why are you ignoring Brian,"He asked.<br>"I am not IGNORING him,"I said.  
>"Yes you are,"He said.<br>"How,"I demanded.  
>"Every time he calls, you hang up,"He said,"Why are you doing that?"<br>"I kissed him, John,"He doesn't want to be my friend anymore."  
>"He LIKES you Sammy,"He said,"And he cares about you. If he didn't, he wouldn't be calling."<br>"Do you think he really likes me,"I asked.  
>"Oh, yes,"He said,"Claire told me so."<br>I smiled.  
>"I guess I should talk to him then,"I said.<br>"Gonna call him,"He asked.  
>"I'll go to his house,"I said.<br>"Okay, I gotta go to detention sis,"He said,"Have fun. But not TOO much fun, okay?"  
>I laughed and nodded. John kissed my head and walked out the door with his jacket. I found Brian's address in the phone-book and walked toward his house. I wanted to apologize to him in person. When I got there, I stood for a few seconds, then rang the doorbell. Brian answered.<br>"Hey Sammy,"He said,"What are you doing here?"  
>"I wanted to apologize,"I said,"For running away from the picnic, and ignoring you the past week. I'm sorry."<br>"It's okay,"He said,"Wanna come in?"  
>I followed him in the house.<br>"Is anyone here,"I asked.  
>"My parents are at work,"Brian said,"I'm supposed to be studying...oh well."<br>"Do know why I ran away,"I asked.  
>"No, why,"He asked.<br>"I fucked up, that's why,"I said,"I kissed you. But..you don't like me. At least, not how I like you."  
>"Sammy..I do like you,"He said,"I didn't think you liked me."<br>"Really,"I asked excitedly.  
>"Yes,"He said,"When I said you were beautiful, and sweet, I meant it. I know I don't know you very well, but I like you, a lot."<br>"I'm sorry Brian,"I said,"I'm afraid to get close to anyone. Physically and emotionally. That's why my last boyfriend cheated on me."  
>"Your last boyfriend,"He asked slowly.<br>"A real asshole,"I smirked,"He only wanted what all boys want. And I couldn't give it to him. I just wasn't ready."  
>"Oh,"He said,"I don't want that, Samantha."My face lit up when he said my full name,"Well, it's not the most important thing in a relationship."<br>"What is the most important thing,"I asked,"In your opinion."  
>"Trust,"He said,"Patience, caring, love."<br>I giggled.  
>"That's four things,"I joked.<br>I flinched as he grabbed my hands lightly.  
>"Do you trust me,Samantha,"He asked.<br>"I..I don't know,"I stuttered.  
>"Please don't cry, Sammy,"He said,"I understand."<br>I slipped my hands out of his collapsed down on the couch. I buried my head in my hands. Brian crouched next to me.  
>"Sammy,"He said.<br>I sat up.  
>"Brian, I'm not a virgin,"I said slowly.<br>"So,"He asked.  
>"I didn't lose it,"I said.<br>"Huh,"He asked.  
>"It was stolen from me,"I said.<br>"Oh god, you mean..,"He started.  
>"Yes,"I said,"By Father."<br>He looked horrified.  
>"I was twelve,"I continued,"He said he just wanted to talk to me, and I believed him. Like an idiot. I thought he wanted to make up with me for the years of ignoring me. I regretted going in his room once I saw the evil look on his face...and he started ripping my clothes off...I was so scared..dammit Brian, it hurt so fucking much...then I lied to John.."<br>He hugged me as I collapsed into his arms, crying.  
>"It's not your fault Sammy,"He said,"I know you're scared. I'll never hurt you, I swear."<br>I looked at him, very closely. He was smiling. I grabbed the back of his neck and kissed him softly on the lips. I pulled away almost immediately. I was about to leave, when he grabbed me gently.  
>"Samantha, please don't leave,"He said.<br>I nodded.  
>"Okay,"I said,"I won't leave you again, Brian. I promise."<br>I leaned on his shoulder and he put his arm around mine. He grabbed the remote and turned on the TV.  
>"Wanna watch TV,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,sure,"I said.  
>"What do you wanna watch,"He asked.<br>"I dunno, let me see,"I said.  
>He handed me the remote. I flipped through the channels until I found my favorite cartoon.<br>"Let's watch this,"I said.  
>"Tom and Jerry,"He asked.<br>"Got a problem,"I joked.  
>"No, I love cartoons,"He said.<br>"Me too,"I said.  
>"How does a mouse outsmart a cat,"He joked,"And how are they not dead yet?"<br>"Old cartoon logic,"I joked back,"Don't question it."  
>"You know if you step on a rake, it will really hit you in the face,"He said.<br>"What?!"  
>"Yeah,"He said,"I tried it when I was younger, hit me right in the nose."<br>I laughed.  
>"Brian,"I said.<br>"Yeah,"He said.  
>"I...I feel..safe around you,"I told him.<br>He smiled.  
>"Great,"He said.<br>"What's your favorite book,"I asked randomly.  
>"Too many to name,"He said,"What about you?"<br>"Same,"I said,"Favorite Movie?"  
>"Back to the Future,"He said.<br>"Hmm..me too,"I said,"I hear they might make a sequel."  
>"Yeah, THAT'LL happen,"He said sarcastically.<br>"Yeah, you're probably right,"I said,"Um...favorite color?"  
>"Blue,"He said,"You?"<br>"The friggen rainbow,"I said.  
>"The rainbow is your favorite color,"He asked.<br>"No,"I said,"The friggen rainbow."  
>"What's the difference,"He asked.<br>"Well,"I said,"The friggen rainbow has a higher level of friggen than your average, everyday rainbow."  
>"What,"He laughed.<br>We both laughed hysterically.

Brian's POV  
>"Sammy,"I said.<br>"Yeah,"She asked.  
>"Do you wanna go on a real date sometime,"I asked.<br>"Sure,"She said,"Where?"  
>"That cafe on fifth street,"I asked.<br>"Okay,"She said,"What time?"  
>"How's next Friday, at four,"I asked.<br>"Can't wait that long,"She said.  
>"Monday at four,"I asked.<br>"That works,"She said,"Wanna do somethin' fun?"  
>"Yeah, sure,"I said.<br>I should've said no. Sammy and I walked down to the school. We snuck through the hallways and into the library. We hid behind a bookshelf. Sammy grabbed a book and tore the page out of it.  
>"I don't usually destroy literature..,"She said.<br>"Don't,"I said,"What are you doing?"  
>"Calm down, it's just a blank page,"She said.<br>Sammy found a pen on the ground, wrote something on it, crumpled it up, and threw it at John.  
>John's POV<br>I was sitting, bored out of my mind, in detention, when a paper was thrown at me. I uncrumpled and read it: **Hey poopface, look behind the bookshelf. We have a surprise for you.** Sammy's handwriting. I looked behind the bookshelves to find Sammy and Brian crouched behind one, giggling.  
>"What do you want,"I joked.<br>"Bored, John,"Sammy asked sarcastically.  
>"No,"I replied sarcastically,"It's real fun to sit and do nothing for eight hours."<br>"Hey John, guess what,"Sammy said.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>"I'm going on a date with Brian,"She said,"This Monday."

* * *

><p><strong>I literally cried while writing this next part.<strong>

* * *

><p><span>Brian's POV<span>  
><em><strong>Why did you tell him that? Now he is going to kill me.<strong>_ John was a little intimidating. He was the kind of kid that would beat the crap out of me at school. John stepped toward me. I stepped back, my eyes widening a little. He put his hand up, I jumped.  
>"Don't hurt him John,"Sammy said.<br>"I'm not gonna hurt him,"John said.  
>He put his hand on my shoulder.<br>"Take care of her,"John said to me.  
>I nodded.<br>"I will,"I said,"I promise."  
>"Good,"He said,"Cause if you hurt her,I'll kill you."<br>I froze.  
>"John,"Sammy exclaimed.<br>"Just trying to protect you, Sammy,"John said,"Besides, he knows I'm kidding,don't you?"  
>I nodded.<br>"Well you're scaring him,"Sammy said.  
>"Oh, I'm not scared,"I lied.<br>I looked away.  
>"Why are you so scared Brian,"John asked.<br>"Because,"I said,"You used to beat the shit out of me freshman year. And I ratted you out..on accident..then you beat me half to death."  
>John looked at me for a second, as if struggling to remember.<br>"Did you forget John,"I asked,"Because I didn't. Everyday, you'd shove me into a locker or push me into a wall. You made my life hell. My parents took me to a psychiatrist when they caught me cutting. Look at this, John,"I showed him the scars on my stomach, they both gasped,"it's fucked up ,isn't it?"  
>"It..it wasn't that bad,"He said.<br>"Not that bad,"I exclaimed,"I had to rat you out! They threatened to lock me up if I didn't tell the truth! So I did, and what do I get for it? I get beat half to death!"

John's POV  
>I don't know why I beat him like that. I didn't know him then, he was just some random nerd. How could I know he would be my sister's future boyfriend?<br>"I'm sorry,"I told him.  
>As if that will make up for all that shit. Poor Brian.<br>"Why did you do it, John,"Sammy asked.  
>"I don't know,"I said,"Father was really viscous that year."<br>"Oh, well that excuses everything,"Sammy said.  
>"Really,"I asked.<br>"No,"She shouted,"You can't just go around beating people John. If you do, then you're just as bad as our parents!"  
>"Damn it,"I shouted,"Don't you think I know that! I was angry, and I took it out on him, and other people. I didn't mean to..I was just so..angry...I'm sorry. Brian, if you hated me, why were you nice to me in detention..why didn't you just trash me?"<br>"I was scared,"Brian said,"Besides, I thought if I was nice to you, you wouldn't hurt me. I was right."  
>"Brian, come here,"I said.<br>He walked slowly near me. I grabbed him and hugged him.  
>"I'm so sorry, Brian,"I said,"For putting you through that..."<br>"I forgive you,"Brian said,"Besides, it wasn't really you doing it."  
>I let him go.<br>"Huh,"I asked.  
>"It was your father,"He said,"Your father's brutality doesn't excuse everything, but it explains some of it."<br>"John,"Brian said,crying now.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>He looked at the ground.  
>"When I brought the flare gun to school,"He started,"It wasn't the only time I brought a gun to school."<br>"What,"Sammy demanded.  
>"A flare gun,"I asked.<br>"No,"He said,"A real one. I wasn't going to hurt anybody. I wanted to blow your brains out, right in front of everyone. Then I decided not to, and left it buried in my backpack. That's when I decided to start cutting, to avoid hurting people.."  
>"Brian, are you okay,"I asked.<br>"I guess,"He said,"When you pretended to act out my home life, it wasn't even close."

Brian's POV  
>"What's it like,"John asked.<br>I sighed and leaned my head back  
>"An F! Are you stupid?!<br>No.  
>Shut up! You're an idiot!<br>I'm sorry. I tried..  
>You're too dumb to be my son!<br>Dad!  
>I said shut up! Now go to your room, finish your homework, before I beat the shit out of you! Understand?<br>Yes sir."  
>Sammy put her arm around my shoulder.<br>"That was when I failed the elephant lamp,"I said.  
>"Would he really have beat you,"John asked.<br>"No,probably not,"I said,"It's just an empty threat. You see, when I get good grades, my parents love me. When I get anything below a c, they hate me."  
>"They don't hate you, Brian,"Sammy said.<br>"Yeah...sure,"I said.  
>Sammy hugged me.<br>"I should get going,"I said,"I want to be back home before my parents get there."  
>"Bye Brian,"Sammy and John said.<br>"See ya Sammy,"I said,"Bye John."

Sammy's POV  
>Brian left. I looked at John. He was miserable.<br>"John,"I asked.  
>"I'm just like father,"He said.<br>"No you're not,"I said.  
>John hugged me tightly.<br>"Thank you,"He said,"For coming here. I really was bored."  
>"Anytime, John,"I said.<p>

_**You're not like our parents. You're not Father, and you never will be. You will never hurt the people you love, if you can still love. Can you, John? Or is your heart too broken to hold anything else. I know your heart is broken John. How do I know that? Because mine is too. It may be broken beyond repair, but I still love you. I love you, John.**_


	13. Sammy's Nightmares-John the Bully

I lied in my bed, staring at the ceiling. I couldn't go back to sleep. Not after the dream I just had. John had told me about his nightmare earlier. Unlike John, however, I usually can't remember my dreams. I only remembered one thing though, probably the scariest part of my dream. That was when Brian strangled me. I knew it wasn't real, but it was so realistic. I lied there for a little longer, then closed my eyes again.

John and I are in a new apartment. I feel scared. John stands near me. I want to tell him, but I'm afraid. He walks near me, I step back. Why am I scared? Out of nowhere, John slams me into a wall. My nose is bleeding. I try to run, but he catches me. He twists my arm behind my back. "You're not getting away that easily,"John says. He throws me against the wall a few more times, then across the room. Then, finally, he kicks me as I lie on the floor.

My eyes shoot open. John didn't protect me, he hurt me. No he didn't, it was a dream. I was back in my room at Andy's house. After I stopped shaking, I stood up. Once I walked around the room for a while, my breathing returned to normal. I remembered that entire dream, so vivid, so real. I made my way to John's room, just down the hall.  
>"John,"I whispered, and shook him lightly,"Wake up. I need to talk to you."<br>John groaned. He opened his eyes slightly and looked at me.  
>"About what,"He asked.<br>"I had a bad dream,"I said.  
>He sat up.<br>"Tell me about it,"He said.  
>"Well, I don't remember the first one,"I said.<br>I told him what I remembered about the first nightmare.  
>"And the second one.."He asked.<br>"You're not gonna like it, John,"I said.  
>"Tell me,"He said.<br>I told him the second dream. He looked worried.  
>"You're having nightmares too, huh,"He asked.<br>I sat on his bed. He put his arm around me.  
>"You know I wouldn't hurt you, right,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said,"I know."  
>I followed him down the stairs to sit on the couch. Someone came down the stairs. John stopped me before I could run and hide.<br>"It's probably just one of Andy's parents,"John said.  
>It wasn't. It was Andy himself.<br>"What are you two doing up,"Andy asked.  
>"I couldn't sleep,"I said.<br>"She had a nightmare,"John said.  
>I nodded.<br>"Andy,"John said.  
>"Yeah,"Andy asked.<br>"I talked to Brian earlier,"John said,"And...sometimes at school, I'd beat people up..mostly nerds. Well...Brian was one of those nerds."  
>"You beat up Brian,"Andy asked, shocked.<br>"It was a long time ago,"John said,"Freshman year. I didn't know who he was. I told him I was sorry, as if that would make up for it. He said he forgave me. But..I don't know."  
>"John,"Andy said,"I apologized to Larry."<br>"You did,"John asked.  
>"Yes,"Andy said,"It was weird. I didn't really know what to say. But I did it, that Monday after detention."<p>

Andy's POV  
>"What did you say,"Sammy asked.<p>

**Flashback...**  
><strong>It was the Monday after detention. I waited for the last bell of the day to ring. Then I went to my locker and got my backpack. I noticed Larry walking down the hallway. He saw me and hurried past. I grabbed him and dragged him into the bathroom. I stood in front of the door so he couldn't leave. He looked at me fearfully.<strong>  
><strong>"What,"He asked. <strong>  
><strong>"I can't tell you this in front of anyone,"I said,"But, I'm sorry. For wailing on you."<strong>  
><strong>"It's okay,"He said.<strong>  
><strong>"No, it's not,"I said,"It must've been so humiliating for you. So unreal."<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah,"He said,"Scary, is what it was. You hit hard, you know that?"<strong>  
><strong>"Will you forgive me,"I asked.<strong>  
><strong>"What do you care,"Larry asked.<strong>  
><strong>I told him why I did it. I told him about my father. <strong>  
><strong>"Fine, I forgive you,"He said,"Can I go now?"<strong>  
><strong>I moved away from the door. He practically ran out the door.<strong>

_present.._  
>"What's your point,"John asked.<br>"You have to learn to forgive yourself, John,"I said.

Brian's POV  
>I haven't thought of John the Bully in a while. I didn't know who he was then, just that his last name was Bender because he got in trouble a lot. I don't know why he chose me, there were plenty of others smaller than me. He made me terrified to go to school. When he beat me half to death for ratting him out, I was taken to the hospital. I'd passed out.<p>

**Flashback...**  
><strong>The week after ratting out John...<strong>  
><strong>I walked out of the school, carrying my homework with me.<strong>  
><strong>"Hey Brian,"A voice said harshly.<strong>  
><strong>I knew the voice. It was the asshole who picks on me. I started to run.<strong>  
><strong>"Hey, don't you run from me,"Bender shouted.<strong>  
><strong>I kept running. He caught up with me a block later. He twisted my arm behind my back, knocking the things out of my hands.<strong>  
><strong>"Did you rat me out,Brian,"He asked.<strong>  
><strong>"N..no,"I lied.<strong>  
><strong>"I don't like liars,"He said, and twisted my arm more.<strong>  
><strong>I screamed.<strong>  
><strong>"Okay, yes,"I said,"But I had to.."<strong>  
><strong>He let go of my arm and grabbed my hair.<strong>  
><strong>"Detention is boring,"He said,"I don't like it much."<strong>  
><strong>With that, he slammed my body into the brick wall of an apartment we were standing in front of. I fell on the ground, dizzy. He stomped on me and kicked me in the head. He slammed my head against the ground again. I started to black out. I opened my eyes to feel another sharp pain in my shoulder, then passed out completely.<strong>

**John's POV**  
><strong><em>I just murdered someone. Oh f*ck! <em>****Seeing that his shoulder popped out of place, I reset it. I was glad when he screamed, knowing that he was alive. Then he passed out.**  
><strong>"Brian,"I said,"Brian are you okay? Are you alive?"<strong>  
><strong>That's a stupid question. I looked at Brian. He looked like me after getting beat by my parents. It that what I am? Have I turned into my father? I pick Brian up. His body is limp, he's passed out. <strong>  
><strong>"Come on Brian,"I said,"I'm taking you to the hospital."<strong>  
><strong>I couldn't leave him there to die. I carried him to the hospital, a few blocks away. <strong>  
><strong>"We're almost there,"I said, when Brian groaned,"Hang in there."<strong>  
><strong>When I got to the hospital, I told them that he'd been mugged. I silently apologized to Brian, and left. I lost control. I could've murdered that kid. Maybe I should say sorry to him, tell him about my parents. <strong>**_What would he care, though?_**** Some kid beats the crap out of him, then tries to excuse it by saying his parents beat him. ****_What would he care, what would anyone care?_**

_Present..._  
><span>Brian's POV<span>  
>John left me alone after that. I barely saw him again, untill that time in detention. I was terrified when I saw him, all the memories flowed back. I didn't know if he recognized me, probably not, at least I hoped not. I'd decided to be nice to him, the exact opposite of what I wanted to do. I wanted to confront him, ask him why he did all that.<br>He didn't know. John didn't know why he did it. At least, he said he didn't, and I believe him. He even apologized, and it sounded sincere, I think it was. Then he hugged me. I knew he felt guilty. I saw tears in his eyes when I showed him my scars. I looked at my scars again. Those are real, genuine slicing scars.

He's not John the Bully anymore. He's just John Bender, my friend. And I like John Bender. But I hated John the Bully. It's like they were two different people, and they are. I hated John for the longest time. But I meant it when I said I forgave him.

I heard my phone ring. _**Who could be calling this late?**_ I answered the phone.  
>"Hello,"I said quietly.<br>"Brian,"John's voice asked.  
>"Hey John,"I said.<br>"Remember when I knocked you out,"He asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"How could I forget? I woke up in the hospital."<br>"D..did you ever find out who took you there,"He asked.  
>"No,"I said.<br>"It was me",He said.  
>"Huh,"I asked.<br>"I took you to the hospital,"He said,"I thought I'd killed you. I popped your shoulder back into place, then you passed out. I..I couldn't leave you there to die...so, I carried you to the hospital. I told them you were mugged."  
>"John..I.."I started.<br>"I'm sorry,"He said,"I lost control..I...could've killed you...Maybe you should've shot me...would've done me a favor..."  
>"Don't say that John,"I said,"I said I forgave you John, and I meant it. You're my friend now, okay?"<br>"O..okay,"He said, his voice almost broken,"Bye Brian."  
>"Bye John,"I said.<p>

I hung up. I wished I could reach through the phone and hug John. He sounded so miserable.


	14. This Chapter Has No Title

I went back to my room. I heard tiny rocks being thrown at my window. I opened my curtain. Sammy stood there, holding rocks in her hand. I opened the window and stuck my head out a little.

"Don't you people ever sleep,"I joked.  
>"Nope."<br>"What do you want,"I asked.  
>"Why don't you come and see,"She said.<br>I hopped out the window and slid down the rain-gutter, somehow managing to shut the window in the process. I went to Sammy.  
>"Where are we going,"I asked.<br>"You'll see,"She said.  
>I followed her down the sidewalk. We walked down a small path, ending with a lake. A full moon shimmered off the blackened liquid below us.<br>"That's why you're acting so crazy,"I said,"Full moon."  
>"It's beautiful, isn't it,"She said.<br>"Sure is,"I said,"Where'd you find this place?"  
>"John told me about it,"She said,"He'd take his girlfriends here sometimes. And they'd..you know.."<br>We sat on the dock.  
>"I don't think you're ready for that, Sammy,"I said.<br>"I know,"She said,"Are you?"  
>"I barely know you,"I said.<br>"I need to tell you something,"She said.  
>"What's that,"I asked.<br>"I had a bad dream tonight,"She said,"I barely remember it , just the part where you strangled me."  
>"Why would I do that,"I asked.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"Tell me I'm paranoid, Brian,"I said.<br>"You're paranoid, Samantha,"He said.  
>He kissed me. I let him lean me back a little.<br>"I need to tell you something too,"He said.  
>"What's that,"I asked.<br>"I don't like being a virgin sometimes,"He said.  
>I panicked. I pushed him away from me, and he fell into the lake. I fished him out and lied him back on the deck. Maybe I am paranoid.<br>"I didn't mean it like that, Sammy,"He said.  
>"I'm sorry Brian, I thought.."I started,"I'm sorry."<br>"I wasn't going to hurt you Sammy,"He said.  
>I lied next to him.<br>"I know,"I said,"I'm paranoid."  
>"No, just scared,"He said,"Do you act like this with all your boyfriends?"<br>"Not usually,"I said,"I don't get close to people. But, there is someone I would like to get close to."  
>"Who's that,"He asked.<br>"You, Brian,"I said,"I want to get close to you. Really close."  
>"Literally or metaphorically,"He asked.<br>"Both,"I whispered in his ear.  
>He was starting to shake from the cold.<br>"We should get you home,"I suggested,"Before you die of hypothermia."  
>"Th..that s..sounds like a g..good idea,"He shivered.<br>I walked him home. I kissed him on the cheek.  
>"See ya Monday,"I said.<br>I walked home. John was waiting up for me.  
>"And just where were you,"John said.<br>"With Brian,"I said,"At the lake."  
>"What,"He demanded.<br>"Relax John,"I said,"We didn't DO anything. We just talked. Then I kinda..pushed him into the lake."  
>"Why? Is he okay?"<br>"I got scared,"I said,"He said something..and I panicked."  
>"What did he say?"<br>"He said he didn't like being a virgin sometimes,"I said,"He wasn't going to hurt me John,I'm sure of it."  
>"Okay,"He said,"Go to bed now, you need sleep."<br>"I'll try to sleep,"I said,"You get some sleep too, John."  
>"I will sis,"He said.<p>

Brian's POV  
>I removed my soaking wet clothes and put them in the laundry basket. That lake must've been pretty clean, because there wasn't any algae on them. I put on some dry pajamas.<br>What the hell was I thinking? Saying that to Sammy? I must've scared the living crap out of her. Now I know that she's stronger than me. I'll never do to her what her father did to her, or her ex-boyfriend, for that matter.  
>I lied down on my bed and went back to sleep.<p>

_Monday..._  
>I waited at the cafe on fifth street for Sammy to get there. I began to wonder if she just decided not to come.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I was already late for my date with Brian. A half-hour late. I asked Kim to give me a ride there. She agreed. I said good bye to her and walked in the cafe. I looked around for a minute, then saw Brian. I sat at the table, a two person table.<br>"I thought you weren't coming,"He said.  
>"I got distracted,"I said.<br>"Oh..okay,"He said,"What do you want to eat, or drink.  
>"I'll have a cookie,"I said,"A sugar cookie. And some coffee."<br>He smirked.  
>"Small coffee,"He asked.<br>"Medium,"I said,"I like coffee."  
>"Okay, I'll be right back,"He said.<br>He went over to the front counter for a few minutes, then came back with two medium coffees and two giant sugar cookies.  
>"You got medium too,"I asked.<br>"I like coffee,"He said.  
>I took the lid off of my coffee. I broke off a peice of cookie and dipped it in the coffee.<br>"How's that taste,"He asked.  
>"Sweet, like you,"I said.<br>We both laughed. I grabbed a bunch of sugar packets and poured them into my coffee.  
>"Want some coffee with that sugar,"He joked.<br>"Nope,"I joked back.  
>We laughed again. He didn't add anything to his coffee. I looked at him like I was about to puke.<br>"What,"He asked.  
>"Plain coffee, black,"I asked,"That's disgusting..it's sour."<br>"Yeah,"He said, also dipping his cookie in the coffee.  
>I finished off my coffee.<br>"That was fast,"He said.  
>"Yep,"I said.<br>I threw my empty cup away. When I got back, Brian had finished his cookie and coffee. I ate the rest of my cookie, then we left.  
>"What do you wanna do now,"He asked.<br>"Wanna go to my house,"I said,"I mean...Andy's house?"  
>"Sounds good,"He said.<br>We walked to Andy's house. When we got inside, Kim was waiting for us.  
>"You should've called me Samantha,"She said politely,"I would've picked you two up."<br>"I know,"I said,"We wanted to walk."  
>"How was your date,"She asked.<br>"Good,"I said.  
>"John said he wanted to talk to you,"She said,"After you got home."<br>"All right, I'll go talk to him,"I said,"Thank you Kimberly."  
>She smiled at me and I went with Brian up to John's room.<br>"Are you sure I should go in there,"Brian asked.  
>"Yes, it's fine,"I said, and opened the door.<br>"Hey Sammy,"John said,"Hi Brian."  
>"Hi John,"Brian said.<br>"What did you want John,"I asked.  
>"Just wanted to talk about your date,"John said,"I didn't think Brian would be here."<br>"Is that a problem,"Brian asked in a mockingly taunting tone.  
>John smirked.<br>"No problem Bri,"John said,"Just wanna know what happened that's all."  
>"What is this, an interrogation,"I asked.<br>"Yes,"John joked,"You have the right to remain silent.."  
>I stared blankly at him, struggling to hold a straight face.<br>"Talk..."John said.  
>"We went to the cafe..",I started.<br>"Wait,"Brian chimed.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth,"He asked.  
>John and Brian laughed.<br>"Yes,"I laughed.  
>"Continue,"John said.<br>"We both got a giant cookie,"I said,"And medium coffees."  
>"She said the cookie was sweet..like me,"Brian said.<br>"YOU..sweet,"John joked,"Pshh...yeah right."  
>"Brian had plain coffee, with no sugar,"I said.<br>"Plain coffee is my favorite,"John said.  
>"You guys are gross,"I said.<br>"What are you too gonna do now,"John asked.  
>"Hang out in my room,"I said.<br>"And.."John asked.  
>"We're gonna get about ten hookers or so,"I said,"And have an orgy."<br>"What,"Brian asked.  
>"Guys or girls,"John asked.<br>"Both,"I said.  
>"All right, have fun,"John said,"But keep the door open okay?"<br>"If you insist,"I said.  
>John sat back on his bed. I closed his bedroom door a little. Brian and I walked to my room. I sat on my bed, he sat on the floor next to the bed.<br>"What now,"Brian asked.  
>I smiled and closed my door quietly.<br>"Sammy, what are you doing,"Brian whispered,"We're supposed to keep the door open."  
>I sat next to him and ran my fingers through his hair.<br>"Aren't you tired,Brian,"I said,"Sick of being a virgin?"

Brian's POV  
>I didn't move or say anything.<br>"Take me Brian,"She leaned back and pulled me toward her,"Take me right now."  
>"What are you talking about,"I asked.<br>She let go of me and burst out laughing. She stood up and walked to a desk drawer, returning with some markers and paper.  
>"What's wrong Bri,"She asked,"Don't like me?<br>"It's not that,"I said,"I just..don't think you're ready. Besides, your brother's in the other room."  
>"It's fine,"She said, and handed me some markers and paper,"They're scented."<br>"I like scented markers,"I said.  
>"John got them for me,"She said,"I asked him for some scented markers, and he said 'sis, that's a real weird way to get high' and I said 'I don't wanna get high, I just like the smell they leave on paper' and he said 'okay, I'll get you some.'"<br>Sammy's POV  
>Brian took the lid off the marker. I took this as the perfect opportunity to mess with my brother.<br>"Yeah Brian, take that off,"I said loudly.  
>"What are you doing, keep it down,"Brian said.<br>"You'll see,"I said.  
>Brian started scribbling on a paper.<br>"Do that again,"I said loudly.  
>"Shh.."Brian said.<br>"Yeah that's it,"I said loudly,"That feels great."  
>Suddenly, the door opened. John appeared.<br>"What's going on in h...,"John started, then stopped when he saw me giggling.  
>"We're coloring John,"I said,"Is there a problem?"<br>"Right..coloring,"John said.  
>John walked in and shut the door behind him. I threw a marker at him.<br>"Go away,"I joked.  
>He picked it up and threw it back.<br>"No, you go away,"He said.  
>Brian threw a marker at John.<br>"No, you go away,"Brian said.  
>And so began the marker war.<p>

Claire's POV  
>It was only one moment. The moment I lost my virginity. In the closet, to the 'criminal' John Bender. He was a real jerk, at first. He was so patient, so caring with me. I knew he wasn't a virgin, far from it. I didn't want to be another one of his 'wallet girls'. So I let him take me, and never regretted it, until now.<p>

I looked at the pregnancy test, the fourth one I've taken today. _**This can't be right, there has to be a mistake. Positive, how can it be positive! How would I tell my parents? How would I tell John? Should I tell John? Has he ever gotten someone pregnant before? Will he just leave?**_ I threw the tests away, cleverly hidden below tissue paper in the trashcan of my bathroom and lied down on my bed. I buried my head in my pillow and cried. _**Should I tell**_** him?**

* * *

><p>WILL CLAIRE TELL JOHN? WILL JOHN STAY WITH HER OR LEAVE? WHO WILL WIN THE MARKER WAR? FIND OUT, IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT OF...SAMANTHA BENDER. :0<p> 


	15. Claire

_April 16, 1985_  
><em> Dear Diary,<em>  
><em> I think I could be pregnant. I'm scared to tell John. I know it would be his<em>  
><em> if I really was. I don't know what to do. I'm scared. I can't take care of a <em>  
><em> child, I don't know how!<em>

The doorbell rang. I put my diary away and ran downstairs to answer it. It was the last person I wanted to see right now, John.  
>"Hey Claire,"He said.<br>"Hey John,"I said,"What..uh..what are you doing here?"  
>"I wanted to tell you about my sister's first date with Brian,"He said.<br>I followed him down the road untill we came to a bench, where we sat down.  
>"Oh, how was it,"I asked,"How is Sammy?"<br>"She's fine,"He said,"And they both said it went great. What's wrong, Claire?"  
>"Oh, nothing,"I said.<p>

John's POV  
>"Claire, I know when something's wrong,"I said,"Now tell me, what's wrong?"<br>She sighed.  
>"Remember that time in the closet,"She asked,"During detention?"<br>I smiled fondly.  
>"Is that what you're worried about,"I asked,"Claire, you were great. Don't worry."<br>"It's not that,"She said.  
>"Then what is it,"I asked.<br>"John...I think I might be.."She started,"Pregnant."  
>My jaw dropped. I'd never gotten anyone pregnant before, I've been close, but it always turned out to be a scare.<br>"Are...are you sure,"I asked.  
>"I took four tests, John,"She said.<br>I put my head in my hands and groaned. Claire sniffled.  
>"I..I'm sorry John,"She said.<br>I put my head up as she ran away.  
>"Claire, wait,"I shouted.<br>She kept running. I decided not to chase after her, that she needed some time to think. I walked back to Andy's house and sat on the front step outside. I buried my head in my hands again.  
>"What's wrong John,"Someone asked.<br>I looked up. It was Andy.  
>"Claire told me she might be pregnant,"I said.<br>"Is it yours,"He asked.  
>"Yeah, most likely,"I said.<br>"Are you going to keep it,"He asked.  
>"I don't know,"I said.<br>"Are you going to leave her John,"He asked.  
>I looked down.<br>"You can't leave her, not like this,"Andy said.  
>"No,"I said.<br>I got up and started running.

Claire's POV  
>I paced the floor in my living room, eyes soaked with tears. Someone walked in the door. I wiped my eyes and saw it was John.<br>"You can't just walk into people's houses, John,"I said.  
>"I need to talk to you Claire,"He said.<br>"You should go,"I said.  
>"I..I'm not leaving you,"He said.<br>He walked over to me and grabbed my hand. He got down on one knee.  
>"Claire, will you marry me,"He asked.<br>"Are you sure John,"I asked.  
>"One hundred percent,"He said,"Look, I don't have money for a ring or anything right now, but..I love you,Claire."<br>"Then, yes,"I said.  
>He stood up and we kissed.<p> 


	16. The Meeting

"Do I have to tell them, John,"I asked.  
>"Come on, they're your parents,"John said,"They'll understand."<br>"Fine, I'll tell them,"I said,"But.. you'd better leave first."  
>"All right,"He said, and kissed me,"See you later."<br>John walked out the door and left.

John's POV  
>I walked back to Andy's house. Inside, Andy, Sammy and Andy's parents were sitting on the couch.<br>"Andy,"I said,"You didn't happen to TELL anyone about our conversation earlier, did you?"  
>"No,"Andy said,"I told Sammy, then she told everybody."<br>"Everybody,"I asked.  
>"My parents,"He said.<br>"What happened John,"Rick asked.  
>"I proposed to her,"I said,"W..we're getting married."<br>Sammy ran up and hugged me.  
>"Congradulations, John,"Kim said.<br>Kim and Rick left the room.  
>"Andy,"I said,"Call the rest of the breakfast club. Tell them to meet me at my last detention this Saturday at 10 am. Tell them it's important, that I need to tell them something."<br>"Can I come,"Sammy asked.  
>"Yeah, sure,"I said.<br>"Will do,"Andy said.  
>"I'm gonna be an aunt,"Sammy asked.<br>"Possibly,"I said,"We don't know if she's actually pregnant yet."  
>"I'm tired,"She said,"I'm gonna take a nap, see ya John."<br>"Yep,"I said.  
>I sat down on the couch and turned on the TV. I started to doze off when Andy sat by me.<br>"Did you call them,"I asked.  
>"Yep,"He said.<br>"Are they coming,"I asked.  
>"Yep,"He said,"So, you ready to be a father?"<br>"Nope."  
>"You'll be fine, John."<br>"Yeah, maybe."  
>"Allison and I want to have children someday."<br>"Is that so?"  
>"Yeah, of course, we've gotta get married first. We both want to go to college first."<br>"Where you going to?"  
>"I'm going to a university in Chicago. Allison's going to an art college. She's very talented in drawing and poetry."<br>"Hmm.."  
>I started falling asleep.<br>"Tired, John?"  
>"It's been a long day."<br>"I'd say so."

Andy's POV  
>John fell asleep. The doorbell rang, I answered it. Claire stood there, crying.<br>"What's wrong, Claire,"I asked.  
>"Where's John,"She asked,"I need to talk to him."<br>"Claire,"I said,"I already know..John told me."  
>"I know,"She said,"You called me, remember?"<br>"Oh yeah,"I said.  
>"My parents kicked me out Andy,"She said,"They didn't approve of me having a child out of wedlock. So they kicked me out."<br>"Hey John,"I said,"Wake up."  
>"No, let him sleep,"She said,"He's had a rough day with the bomb I dropped on him. I'll go wait in the kitchen until he wakes up."<br>I nodded and let her in.

Claire's POV  
>I lied my head down on the kitchen table and continued to cry.<em><strong> Does John really want to marry me, or is it just because of the baby?<strong>_ I love John, and I will love this baby, if there even is a baby. Those tests aren't always 100% accurate. I know for a fact that John would take good care of a child._** Wouldn't he?**_ He wouldn't be like his father. _**Would he?**_ He won't become like his father._** He might.**_ No way, John is too sweet. _**What if he starts drinking? What if he explodes, loses his temper, hurts someone?**_ No. John will NOT become his father. _**That's all he knows, abuse and hurt. He doesn't know love.**_ Yes he does._** He can't love, he doesn't have a heart**_. Yes he can, and he does.

"Claire,"Someone said.  
>I looked up.<br>"John,"I asked.  
>"They kicked you out, huh,"He asked.<br>"How'd you know,"I asked.  
>"Andy told me,"He said.<br>He sat next to me.  
>"Do you think I'd make a good father,"He asked.<br>I nodded.  
>"Do you,"I asked.<br>"Honestly...no,"He said,"All I know about parenting, I got from my parents, and that was shit."  
>"You practicly raised Sammy, John,"I said,"Since you were three."<br>"Yeah..I guess,"He said.  
>"Do you think I'd make a good mother,"I asked.<br>"The best,"He said, and kissed me.  
>"Thank you, John,"I said.<p>

_Friday..._  
>I went to the doctor's to get a test.<br>"Well Claire,"The doctor said,"Your test shows up posative for pregnancy. Would you like to have a sonogram to check the health of the baby?"  
>"Of course,"I said.<br>They took me to a room with a sonagram machine. I was instucted to put a hospital gown on. A female doctor walked in.  
>"Hello..um Claire,"She said, looking at the chart, then shaking my hand,"My name is Doctor Oakel. I'll be doing your sonogram today."<br>I nodded. I lied on the table/bed.  
>"Okay, Claire,"Dr. Oakel said,"I'm going to put this gel on your stomuch to help read get a better picture."<br>I nodded again. She put the gel on my stomuch and used a tool with a metal ball at the end, hooked to a cord. A grainy black and white picture showed up on the screen, the baby, moving.  
>"Your baby looks healthy so far,"She said.<br>I smiled.  
>"It's moving,"I said.<br>"Yes,"She said.  
>"I know I'm a little young to have a baby,"I said.<br>"How old are you, Claire,"She asked.  
>"17, almost 18,"I said,"It was my first time."<br>"Sometimes, that's all it takes,"She says,"Is the father in the picture?"  
>"Yes, he's very supportive,"I said,"I just came here alone today."<br>She finished the sonogram and wiped the gel off my stomuch. She told me I could get dressed again.  
>"By the way,"I said,"Do you know a boy named John Bender?"<br>"Yes,"She said,"He's the boy who was severly injured a while ago. Why do you ask?"  
>"He's the father,"I said.<p>

John's POV  
>I went for a walk to the park. I needed to think, alone, for a while. When I sat on a park swing, a picture flashed in my mind. Like a peice from the future. I saw a boy, about my age, worn and bitter at the world. He looked just like me, but with red hair, like Claire's. I pictured the boy again, now seeing a different vision. I saw myself, but years older, looking like my father, not at all sober. That boy stood in front of future me. He had a black eye, some lashes on his skin. He looked up at future me with fear and hate, the same look I gave my father when he hit me. "I hate you dad,"The boy said in a voice similar to mine,"I hope you die." I half-expected future me to walk away, but he didn't. Future me crumpled his fist and punched the boy in the face. "Fuck you,Eric,"Future me said. "Fucking drunk,"the boy, now known as Eric, exclaimed, his nose bleeding. Future me grabbed Eric by the throat and wrapped his fingers around Eric's neck. Eric struggled for a while, then fell to the ground, dead.<br>Father never tried to kill us._** I'll be worse than my father.**_ I'll end up killing my own son._** Am I really that fucked up? Who am I kidding?**_ Claire will hate me...Once she gets to know me. But she already knows me._** Who knows when I'll lose my temper again.**_ Claire will leave me...she'll find a better guy to help her care for the kid. _**The kid will hate me, they'll all hate me.**_  
>I walked back to Andy's house and lied down in my bed. I cried for a while. Someone opened the door. I looked up to see that it was Andy.<br>"Where's Sammy,"I asked.  
>"At Brian's house,"Andy said.<br>"Alone,"I asked.  
>"No, she's meeting his parents,"He said,"What's wrong?"<br>"They're gonna hate me,"I said,"Claire and the kid. They'll leave me one day. They'll never love me, I can't be loved."  
>"That's not true,"He said.<br>"My own parents hate me,"I said.  
>"Well, fuck them,"He said.<br>I laughed.  
>"Yeah, I guess,"I said,"But, I had this vision, while I was at the park."<br>I told him about it.  
>"I'll be worse than my own parents,"I said.<br>"No you won't John,"He said.  
>"What if I lose my temper,"I panicked,"What if I hurt Claire, or the baby?"<br>"My parents have been talking about taking you and Sammy to therapy,"He said.  
>"Maybe that's a good idea,"I said.<p>

_Saturday(starting at 10 am)..._  
>I waited in detention for the rest of the Club and Sammy to show up. Minutes later, a paper wad was thrown at my head. I opened it. Up the stairs, behind the bookshelf, it said. I went up where the note said, taking it with me. Sure enough, there was Brian, Andy, Claire, Allison, and Sammy.<br>"Who wrote this,"I asked.  
>Allison raised her hand. I looked at Claire.<br>"Claire,"I said,"You know that I used to beat people up all the time. But, one of them was Brian."  
>"Why did you beat up Brian,"Allison asked.<br>"It was freshman year,"I said,"I didn't know him then. When I saw him in detention, I knew he looked familiar, and when I heard the name Brian..."  
>Sammy cuddled closer to Brian, who put his arm around her.<br>"Onto more pressing matters,"Claire said.  
>We all looked at her.<br>"I'm pregnant,"Claire said.  
>"Wha..when..how.."Brian studdered.<br>"Remember that time in detention when I went to see John in the closet,"She asked, we nodded,"Well, John's a father now."  
>"We're getting married,"I said.<br>"Hey John,"Sammy said,"Where's that closet?"  
>"Down the hall, it's a storage...,"I started, then said,"Wait a minute..."<br>"Come on Brian, let's find that closet,"She said.  
>"Don't you dare,"I said.<br>"Come on John,"she said,"We can't just rip off our clothes here. That's illegal."  
>"You will not rip off each other's clothes anywhere,"I said.<br>"Oh, we already did,"She said.  
>I got up and chased jokingly after Brian. He ran around me.<br>"John, I'm messing with you,"She said.  
>We all laughed.<br>"I know,"I said, and patted her on the back,"And you're not funny Sammy."


	17. Therapy

It was Sammy and my first day in therapy. We went the Friday after the next week of school, at 4:30. Sammy and I went into different offices. The doctor I went with, I didn't hear his name, started asking about my parents.  
>"They're in jail,"I said.<br>"Yes I know,"He said,"Tell me about them."  
>"They beat me and my sister,"I said,"Mostly me, they enjoyed beating me. I didn't know they hit Sammy untill I saw the bruises and lashes on her."<br>He asked me about my sister.  
>"Samantha,"I said,"But most people call her Sammy. She would help take care of me when my parents beat me. She's the only person I show any feeling around. Well, her and Claire."<br>"Claire,"He asked.  
>"My girlfriend..well, fiance,"I said,"We're getting married. She's pregnant."<br>I smiled.  
>"Are you worried John,"He asked.<br>"Yeah, of course,"I said.  
>"Why are you worried John,"He asked.<br>"I'm afraid that I'll become my father, and hurt the people I love,"I said,"I always lose my temper, just like him. I beat people up."  
>"Have you ever hurt Sammy,"He asked.<br>"No,"I said,"But I did something even worse.."  
>"What's that?"<br>"I didn't protect my sister,"I said,"She got beat by our drunk parents when I wasn't there. I mean, damn, she got raped, and I didn't even notice..she never told me."  
>"That's not your fault, John,"He said.<br>"Ever since I was three,"I said,"When she was born, I swore that I would protect my baby sister from our parents. I failed."  
>"Rick and Kimberly tell me that you have trust issues,"He said.<br>"I don't trust anyone,"I said,"Not even myself."

Sammy's POV  
>The therapist that I had was a person who specialized in rape counseling. Her name was Marly.<br>"Samantha,"She started.  
>"C..call me Sammy,"I said.<br>"Okay Sammy,She said,"Would you like to talk about the incident?"  
>"Umm..I..I was twelve..maybe..thirteen..m..my father.."<br>I couldn't get the words out. My body started shaking.  
>"It's all right Sammy,"She said,"You don't have to talk about it."<br>"I was scared,"I said,"I didn't...t..tell anyone..not even John."  
>"That's perfectly normal,Sammy,"She said.<br>"I lied to him,"I said,"I tell John everything, except for this. I lied and told him I'd started my period. He..he believed me. Then I got in the shower, sat down, hugging my knees and sobbing."  
>"Did you want to tell him,"She asked.<br>"I wanted to,"I said,"But I just couldn't tell him, couldn't let the words come out. I had to make up a story."  
>"Perhaps you were afraid that your father would harm you if you told someone,"She said.<br>"Probably,"I said.  
>"Did your father threaten you,"She asked.<br>"He told me that I'd better keep my mouth shut,"I said,"But with more swear words. He said if I told, it'd be...worse..n..next..time..I didn't want there to b..be a ..n...next..time."  
>"How much has this effected your romantic relationships,"She asked.<br>"My ex-boyfriend,"I said,"Cheated on me because I wouldn't..you know..sleep with him. My current boyfriend, Brian, everytime I get close to him, that fucking scene flashes in my head and I push him away. I know he won't hurt me."  
>"Sammy, fear of intimate relationships is normal for rape victims,"She said.<br>"I'm not a victim,"I said,"It was my fault. I never should have believed him. I'm such an idiot!"  
>"You're not an idiot,"She said,"And none of this is your fault. Your father took advantage of your trust, and he violated you. That was wrong of him. You did nothing wrong Sammy. Understand?"<br>I wiped the tears from my eyes and nodded.  
>"Tell me about Brian,"She said.<br>"Brian is my boyfriend,"I started,"I guess. We've only went on one real date. I've kissed him a few times. The first time I kissed him, I ran away. I almost ran away the second time, but he caught me and asked me not to run away. I keep pushing him away, but he keeps coming back. I'm glad, though, I don't want him to leave me. I'm afraid.."  
>"That he'll leave you?"<br>"No,"I said,"I'm afraid of being hurt."  
>Marly informed me that the session was over and told me to wait for John in the waiting room. When I got to the waiting room, I saw Brian and Claire.<br>"What are you two doing here,"I asked.  
>"I came to see you,"Brian said,"And Claire came for John."<br>"How was the session,"Claire asked.  
>"P..pretty good,"I said,"John should be out in a minute."<br>She nodded. I sat next to Brian.  
>"Did you talk about.."He started to ask.<br>"She was a rape counselor,"I said,"But not really, kind of."  
>I leaned my head against his shoulder and cried.<br>"Hey,hey don't cry,"Brian said gently,"At least he's in jail. For how long?"  
>"Th..thirty years,"I stuttered.<br>"So he can't hurt you again,"He said.  
>"I hope he dies in jail,"I murmured.<br>Brian smiled and hugged me. John walked in moments later. Claire stood up to greet him, he kissed her.  
>"How'd it go, John,"Claire asked.<br>"Terrific,"John said.

Kim's POV  
>Sammy's therapist was talking to me in her office.<br>"Samantha blames herself for her rape,"The therapist said.  
>"Why,"I asked.<br>"This is common with many rape victims,"She said,"She can't seem to forgive herself. She seems to be very close to her brother."  
>"I was told he practically raised her,"I said,"Her parents usually ignored her."<br>I paused for a second.  
>"Will she be..okay,"I asked.<br>"With proper counseling, she can move on from the trauma of her rape and abuse,"she said,"For now, let her be with her brother. He seems to be the only man she trusts."

Rick's POV  
>John's therapist was talking to me in his office.<br>"John has built up a sort of wall,"The therapist said.  
>"Huh,"I asked.<br>"This is common with abused children,"He said,"John has built up a sort of wall, a barrier, to keep people out and his emotions in."

Sammy's POV  
>"Sammy..uh, Rick told us to wait in the car,"He said,and showed me a pair of keys.<br>"Someone actually trusted you with a set of car keys,"I said.  
>"Guess so,"John said, then looked at Brian and Claire,"You two wanna come with us?"<br>"No thanks, I gotta get home and study,"Brian said.  
>"Kay bye Brian,"I said,"Call me."<br>"I will,"He said.  
>I kissed him lightly. I got close to him and whispered in his ear.<br>"If you come with me,"I whispered,"We can make out in the back seat of the car."  
>"All right, I'll stay,"Brian said.<br>John, Claire, Brian and me walked out to the car. Brian and I sat in the back seat, John in the passanger seat, and Claire in the driver's seat. John handed the keys to Claire, who proceeded to put them in the ignition and turn on the radio.  
>"What is this sh*t,"John exclaimed.<br>"This sh*t is Elvis,"Claire said.  
>John turned the station, a metal song was on.<br>"That's better,"He said,"Whattya think Sammy?"  
>"Not loud enough,"I said.<br>John turned it louder.  
>"Brian,"I said close enough for him to hear,"Are you going to college?"<br>"Yeah,"He said,"It's a local college."  
>"So..will you still be here, in town,"I asked,"Will you still get to see me?"<br>"Of course,"He said.  
>"Will you still want to see me,"I asked.<br>"Yes,"He said.  
>"Brian, there's girls in college,"I said,"Older girls...who are prettier, smarter and more mature than me."<br>"I would never leave you Sammy,"He said,"I'll never cheat on you."  
><em><strong>Bullshit. It's all guys ever do, all men ever do: Lie, cheat, and hurt you.<strong>_

_Monday..._  
>"Samantha Bender, please report to the principle's office,"Said a voice on the loudspeaker.<br>"Ohhhhhh,"some classmates joked accusingly.  
>I rolled my eyes. I walked up to the math teacher, Ms. Lileep.<br>"Go ahead,Samantha,"Ms. Lileep said.  
>I walked to the principle's office, about ten miles on the other side of the school.<br>"Samantha,"Mr. Vernon said when I came in.  
>"Yes,"I said.<br>"Sit down please,"He said.  
>I sat down.<br>"I never thought I'd have a Bender in here for anything other than detention,"He said.  
>"If you called me in here to insult my brother, then I'm leaving,"I said.<br>"That is not why I called you in here,"He said.  
>"Then what is it,"I asked.<br>"Due to your perfect grade point average,"He said,"And having almost no discipline problems, the school is offering to have you skip tenth grade and go directly to eleventh grade."  
>"I'd love to,"I said.<br>He handed me some papers.  
>"Have your parents fill these out,"He said.<br>"But my parents are..,"I started.  
>"Incarcerated, yes,"He said,"Just have them filled out by your current guardian."<br>"John,"I said,"Is my guardian."  
>"John is.."<br>"Going to be 18 in a few weeks,"I said.  
>He rolled his eyes.<br>"Just get them filled out and returned before the last week of school,"He said.  
>"Yes,sir,"I said firmly.<br>"You may go back to class now, miss Bender,"He said.  
>I got up and started walking out the door. I stopped and turned around.<br>"By the way,"I said,"If you wanna see somethin funny, come see John and Claire and thier SON in five years."  
>I walked out into the hallway, leaving Mr. Vernon with a slightly stunned look on his face. I went to the classroom Brian was in.<p>

Brian's POV  
>I was in my chemistry class when I saw Sammy wave at me through the tiny window in the door. I raised my hand.<br>"Yes Brian,"Mr. Weedle asked.  
>"May I use the restroom,"I asked.<br>"Of course,Brian,"He said.  
>Mr. Weedle had payed more attention to me since the flare gun incident. He was the one that heard it go off. He talked to me the Monday after about suicide not being a good answer to failure.<br>"Thank you,"I said.  
>I walked out into the hallway. Some of my friends were in that class. I knew they could see Sammy waving at me.<br>"Guess what Bri,"She asked.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>She showed me some papers.  
>"I get to skip a grade,"She exclaimed.<br>"Congratulations,"I said.  
>She kissed my cheek.<br>"Are your friends in there,"She asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"Some of them."<br>She messed up my hair and my shirt.  
>"Go back in there,"She said,"See you after school."<br>"See you,"I said.  
>I walked back into the classroom. I sat back in my chair.<br>"Brian,"Mr. Weedle said,"Next time you sneak out to see a girl, fix yourself before you come back in."  
>I caught my reflection in the mirror. My hair was messed up and my shirt was crinkled. It looked like I'd just been in a make-out session. My friend Ryan, who shared a table with me, patted my shoulder. I blushed.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I tried to figure what class John would be in now. <em><strong>Who am I kidding, he wouldn't be in a class right now<strong>_. I snuck to the west side of the building, slyly sneaking out the door. John stood, leaning against the wall, in the parking lot.  
>"John,"I said.<br>He looked over.  
>"What are you doing out here Sammy,"He asked.<br>"Look at this,"I said, and handed him the papers.  
>"Skipping a grade, huh,"He asked,"Good job sis."<br>He pulled me into a hug with his free arm. The doctors gave him a more flexible cast, so he could move his arm easily. He let me go.  
>"See ya John,"I said.<br>I walked back to my math class, leaving a note in Brian's locker.

Brian's POV  
>The bell rang. Time for lunch. The Breakfast Club didn't all have lunch at the same time. I had lunch with Allison and Andy. They usually sit together. Maybe Sammy and I should sit together. I went to my locker, now repaired from the explosion. I put my things in my locker and pulled out a note: <em><strong>Meet me in the janitor's closet at lunch, from Sammy.<strong>_ I shrugged and put the note in my pocket. I began to walk to the closet, the one just down the hall, very spacious. My friend Ryan caught up with me.  
>"Was that your girl Bri,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said,"Her name's Samantha."  
>"Samantha who,"He asked.<br>"Bender,"I said.  
>"Is she related to..?"<br>"John Bender. Yeah, that's his sister."  
>"Bender...wasn't that the asshole who beat the shit out of you a few years ago."<br>"Yeah."  
>"And you're dating his sister?! And he hasn't killed you yet?!"<br>"It's complicated. Me and John are friends now."  
>"So, where you going?"<br>"Nowhere."  
>"Riiiight...see ya buddy."<br>He walked away. I opened the door to the closet, Sammy stood there, she pulled me in and shut the door.  
>"What did you want Sammy,"I asked.<br>"I just wanted to talk,"She said.  
>We both sat down.<br>"About what,"I asked.  
>"Just..stuff,"She said,"Maybe we can meet here everyday, and just, talk."<br>"Yeah,sure,"I said.  
>"What ever happened to your elephant lamp,Brian,"She asked.<br>"They let me do it over,"I said,"I'm still not done."  
>"I can help you,"She said.<br>"You can,"I asked.  
>"You think because I'm a girl, I don't know how to make stuff,"She said.<br>"No, that's not,"I started.  
>She laughed.<br>"Come on,"She joked,"I'm John's brother."  
>"Th..thanks,"I said,"You wanna know what happened after the flare gun?"<br>"What,"She asked.  
>"I had to talk to a counselor,"I said,"About suicide and depression and stress and stuff like that."<br>"For how long?"  
>"About two weeks."<br>I scooted closer to her.  
>"Wanna hear about it,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"She said.  
>"I told you what my father said when I told them about the grade,"I said,and when she nodded,I continued:<p>

**Flashback...**  
><strong>I walked down to my room,locking the door behind me,and lied on my bed. I was scared that he would actually beat me, and surprised when he didn't. I couldn't do homework now. I could only sit and think about what a worthless idiot I was. Tears began falling from my eyes. I stuffed my head in my pillow, not wanting to give my parents the satisfaction of hearing me cry. I couldn't take it anymore. I hated how they made me feel like a piece of shit when I messed up. I was sick of being afraid to mess up. I waited until everyone went to sleep then I went up to the attic. There, I saw an old flare gun. I took it and brought it to my room quietly. I stuffed it in the bottom of my book-bag.<strong>  
><strong>I took it to school, I don't know why. Maybe I just wanted to everyone to know how fucked up my life was. Anyways, I went out to my locker during homeroom, when no one was in the hall. I took it out and put it in my mouth. I knew it probably wouldn't kill me,maybe not. I couldn't do it ,though. I put it back in my locker and shut the locker and began to walk away. I was crying. My chemistry teacher,Mr. Weedle, walked down the hallway. We both heard the loud bang. I squeaked and fell to the ground, crying. He helped me to the principles office.<strong>  
><strong>I was sent home. My father picked me up. The ride home was silent, but I was terrified. When we got in the house, he put up his keys. He then turned to me.<strong>  
><strong>"What the fuck is wrong with you,"He shouted.<strong>  
><strong>"I...I.."I stammered.<strong>  
><strong>He stepped closer to me, my eyes widened. He grabbed me and shoved me very hard into the wall. I crumpled to the floor, not looking at him. <strong>  
><strong>"What the fuck were you thinking huh,"He shouted,"Bringing a gun to school!You're lucky you weren't expelled!"<strong>  
><strong>My eyes watered. He picked me up by my shoulders, he was a lot stronger than me.<strong>  
><strong>"Get out of my sight,"He demanded with clenched teeth, and shoved me toward the stairs.<strong>  
><strong>I nodded and ran upstairs. I went in my room and sat on my bed. I didn't cry this time. I just shook, uncontrollably. I was terrified. They've only ever hit me a few times before, but never this bad.<strong>

_present..._  
>"That..that's messed up, Bri,"She said.<br>"You're telling me,"I said.  
>She put her arm around me, I leaned on her shoulder. She took out a pack of gum and handed me one.<br>"Mint,"She said,and put a piece in her mouth.  
>I put mine in my mouth.<br>"It's strong,"I said,"What's it for?"  
>She sighed. She leaned over and kissed me on the lips.<br>"What,"She asked as she pulled away,"You think I asked you here JUST to talk?"

Sammy's POV  
>Brian kissed me back. We stayed kissing, then making out for a while.<p>

John's POV  
>I snuck out of my class with Claire to talk and make out in the janitor's closet. Claire followed me to the spacious closet. When I opened the door, I saw that another couple had a similar idea. Looking closer, I saw that it was Sammy and Brian.<br>"Ahem,"I said loudly.  
>They removed their tongues from each other's mouths and looked up at Claire and I.<br>"I..we..,"Brian stammered.  
>"Shut it,"I demanded,"What the hell were you doing with my sister?!"<br>"We were just.."He started.

Brian's POV  
>John pulled me up by my arm. He pinned me against the wall. Rage gleamed in his eyes. John the Bully has returned.<br>"John, let him go,"Claire shouted.  
>"Stay out of this Claire,"John said,"What was he doing,Sammy?"<br>"Nothing,"Sammy said,"I kissed him first."  
>John set me down for a second and cracked his knuckles. I ducked under him and tried to run. He grabbed my shirt and pulled me back, facing me toward him.<br>"Don't run from me,"He said.  
>I crumpled my fist and punched him right in the jaw. He pulled back, covering his mouth in pain. I ran out of the room while he was distracted. I ran to the bathroom, hid in a stall and locked it.<p>

John's POV  
>I straightened my jaw. That kid could<em> hit<em>. I looked at Sammy again.  
>"We were just kissing ,"Sammy said.<br>"I..I know,"I said.  
>I turned to Claire.<br>"I..I gotta go find him,"I said.  
>I took a deep breath. I was crying and shaking internally. I lost my temper. Again. I walked to where I was certain he was...the bathroom. I stood for a minute.<br>"Come on out Brian,"I said.  
>No response.<br>"I know you're in here,"I said.  
>I pounded loudly on the stall doors untill I heard a slight whimper.<br>"Get out here,"I said,"Now."  
>"No,"Brian said.<br>"I'm not gonna hurt you Brian,"I said.  
>"Bullshit,"He said,"I come out, and you'll kill me."<br>"I'm not mad,"I said.  
>I went into the other stall, stood on the toilet seat, and looked down at Brian. He looked at me, scared.<br>"I'm swear I won't hurt you,"I said,"Please come out."  
>"Go away,"He said.<br>I got down from the toilet and went in front of the stall door he was in.  
>"If you don't come out,"I said,"I will crawl under there and pull you out myself."<br>He unlocked the door and walked out slowly. He balled up his fists.  
>"Please don't hit me again Brian,"I said.<br>"I was scared,"He said.  
>"Wanna know what happened the last time I punched my old man," I asked.<br>"What,"He asked.  
>"Have you ever had your head held below water,"I asked,"Until you can't breathe."<br>"I've had my head stuck in a toilet a few times,"He said.  
>"Did I.."<br>He nodded.  
>"That's what he did. He filled the sink with water and held my head under until I almost passed out."<br>"You gonna do that to me now,"He asked.  
>"No,"I said,"I told you,I'm not mad. I lost my temper, I'm sorry."<br>He looked down.  
>"Would you have cared if I'd told you then,"I asked.<br>"Told me what,"He asked.  
>"After I sent you to the hospital,"I said,"I wanted to tell you..to try to explain about my parents. But I didn't think you would care. I mean, some kid beats the shit out of you, then tries to excuse it by saying his parents beat him."<br>My eyes watered.  
>"Probably,"He said,"You should've told me."<br>I walked past him and into the stall, locking the door behind me. I leaned against the wall and began to cry silently.  
>"John,"He said,"Are you okay?"<br>"I'm fine,"I said.  
>I took out my switchblade and opened it. I held it against my throat. I stood there for a while, thinking about Claire and the baby. <em><strong>I'd be a shitty father anyways<strong>_. I thought about Sammy. _**I'm a horrible brother**_. I thought about Brian. _**I'm a horrible friend, and a horrible person...**_  
>"John..."Brian said,"Are you okay? What are you doing?"<br>"Go away Brian,"I said.  
>"What are you thinking about John,"Brian asked.<br>"You don't want to know,"I said.

Brian's POV  
>John was scaring me. I climbed under the stall to find him standing with a blade to his neck, crying.<br>"Don't.."I said.  
>"I..have...to,"He stuttered.<br>I shook my head. Then I did the only thing I could think of; I hugged him. He folded his blade and put it in his pocket. I unlocked and opened the stall door. We both walked out and stood in front of the sinks.  
>"Don't tell Sammy or Claire about this, okay,"He asked,"I'll tell them myself, later."<br>"Okay,"I said.  
>"And don't tell anyone you punched me,"He said.<br>I nodded. I started walking out of the room.  
>"Bri,"He said.<br>I stopped and turned around.  
>"You can date my sister,"He said,"Just..no funny business okay?"<br>"Yeah,"I said.  
>I walked back outside. Sammy and Claire were waiting outside the door.<br>"What happened,"Claire asked.  
>"He tried to..."I started, then stopped.<br>I sighed and walked away.

Sammy's POV  
>I was about to follow Brian when John walked out a second later.<br>"What happened,"I asked him.  
>"I'm sorry,"He said.<br>He explained what happened in the bathroom. Claire and I hugged him.  
>"You..you wouldn't want a fuck-up as a husband,Claire,"John said.<br>"You're not a fuck-up John,"Claire said,"Far from it."  
>He smiled.<br>"Thanks,"He said,"I'd better get back to class. Love you Claire, love you Sammy."  
>"Love you too,"Claire and I said to him.<br>He kissed me on the head then kissed Claire on the lips. He walked away.  
>"I've got class to,"Claire said,"Bye Sammy."<br>"Bye Claire,"I said.  
>She walked away. I decided to go find Brian. He was in the lunchroom, sitting by Allison and Andy. I sat next to him.<br>"Hey Sammy,"He said.  
>"Hey Brian,"I said,"Wanna go to the park after school? We can talk some more."<br>I smirked.  
>"What time,"He asked.<br>"5:30?"  
>"Sure,"He said.<br>"Where were you guys,"Andy asked.  
>"In the closet,"I whispered,"Down the hall."<br>Andy and Allison laughed.  
>"What'd you do in there,"Allison asked quietly.<br>"Let's just say,"I said quietly,"Brian's not a virgin anymore."  
>"Way to go Bri,"Andy said.<br>"She's lying,"Brian said,"We were making out..then John and Claire caught us.."  
>"Would you have done it,"Allison asked quietly.<br>"Done what?"  
>"Gone all the way. Duh."<br>"Oh,"I said,"I don't know."


	18. Preparing for Prom

John's POV  
>Andy took Sammy and I home after school. I sat in the front seat, Sammy glaring at me from the backseat.<br>"Come on Sammy,I said I was sorry,"I told her.  
>"Whatever,"She said,still glaring.<br>"Don't be mad Sammy,"I begged.  
>"You try to kill my boyfriend,"She yelled,"Then lock yourself in a stall and try to slice your throat, and you expect me not to be mad?!"<br>"You're tired of me, aren't you,"I asked.  
>"Don't talk like that John,"She said.<br>I leaned back against the seat, looking out the side window.

Sammy's POV  
>When we got to Andy's house, I took my bookbag and went up to my room. I took out my books and immediatly started to do my homework. There was a knock at the door.<br>"Who is it?"  
>"Andy."<br>"Come in,"I said.  
>Andy came in.<br>"I heard you have a date with Brian later,"Andy said.  
>"How'd you know?"<br>"John told me."  
>"Who told him.<br>"Brian did."  
>"So, they're talking,"I said plainly.<br>"Are you really mad at John,"He asked.  
>"A little,"I said,"Not really. I'm scared for him. He loses his temper and hurts people sometimes, not even meaning to. He thinks I hate him."<br>"He thinks everybody hates him,"Andy said,"He thinks his child will hate him."

Brian's POV  
>Sammy met me at the park a little after 5.<br>"You're early,"I said.  
>"So are you,"She laughed.<br>"I got in a fight with my parents,"I said.  
>"Oh,"She said.<br>I have to ask her. This is my last chance.  
>"So, Sammy,"I started,"Umm...prom is coming up...next Saturday...and..umm..I'm a senior, so I get in for free..and I was thinking..umm...would you like to..."<br>"I'd love to go to prom with you,"She replied happily, and I breathed a sigh of relief.  
>I smiled. She grabbed my hands and I looked into her brown eyes.<br>"Guess what,"She said.  
>"What,"I asked.<br>"You have to guess,"She said.  
>"You're part duck,"I said.<br>She laughed.  
>"John can't see us,"She said,"He's at home doing homework. He'll be busy for a while."<br>"John does homework,"I asked jokingly.

Sammy's POV  
>"I'm sorry Brian,"I said, and ran my fingers through his hair,"I didn't think John would catch us."<br>"It's fine,"He said,"He was just trying to protect you, that's all."  
>I leaned in and kissed him.<br>"Is that strawberry I taste,"He asked.  
>"Chapstick,"I said.<br>"I like it,"He said.  
>"Want some more,"I asked.<br>He smirked and nodded. We began kissing again, like we did in the closet. He put his arms around me, leaning me back, slowly and gently. _**Brian, stop.**_ I didn't say anything. I let him lean me back further and put his hands on my hips. _**Please, stop.**_ I didn't move. I simply closed my eyes tightly. He put his hand up my shirt slightly. _**Stop touching me.**_

Brian's POV  
>I felt Sammy shaking. I let go of her and sat up slowly. She was pale, ghostly white.<br>"Sammy,are you okay,"I asked.  
>"I'm fine,"She said,"G..go ahead."<br>"No,Sammy,"I said.  
>She sat up and looked at me, the color in her face and body returning.<br>"You're not ready yet,"I said,"It's okay."  
>She nodded. Tears filled her eyes. Seeing her like this, her own inner demons torturing her, made me almost want to cry too.<br>"Why didn't you tell me to stop,"I asked,"I would've."  
>"I froze up, I was scared,"She said.<br>I held her hand gently.  
>"You're shaking,"He said.<br>"I want to get close to you Brian,"She said,"But everytime...every FUCKING time...I try, I keep remembering when he..."  
>"Your father,"I asked stupidly.<br>She nodded. She was shaking even more now.  
>"I keep remembering how he held me down...,"She started,"Tore my clothes off...touched me. I tried to escape...I really did... but I was so scared...and..he was...stronger than me...he threatened me...I was terrified...I couldn't move.."<br>"Sammy, look at me,"I said firmly, but kindly.  
>She looked at me. I put my hands gently on her cheeks.<br>"I will NEVER,"I started,"EVER hurt you."  
>She sniffled.<br>"I'm fucked up Brian,"She said,"You don't want me as a girlfriend."  
>"I like you Sammy,"I said,"I care about you, a lot. And I won't leave you."<br>She grabbed me and hugged me, now crying on my shoulder.  
>"Brian?"<br>"Yeah?"  
>"Thank you,"She said,"For listning, and not leaving."<br>"That's what I'm here for,"I said.  
>"Have you ever had a girlfriend Brian,"She asked.<br>"No,"I said.  
>"Why?"<br>"Too damn shy."  
>She laughed.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I was leaning against Brian's shoulder now.<br>"You know,"He said,"You're the first girl who didn't spit in my face when I talked to her. Except for maybe Claire, and Allison."  
>"Why,"I asked,"You're adorable, sweet.."<br>"People don't like nerds,"He said.  
>"Well I do,"I said.<br>He smiled.  
>"You must have guys asking you out all the time,"He said.<br>"Nah,"I said,"I've had a few guys who like to flirt with me sometimes,but nothing serious. I did have a senior flirt with me once."  
>"Really,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said,"He even asked me to prom. You might know him. His name is Brian."  
>"You gonna go with him?"<br>"Oh definantly."  
>We both laughed.<p>

John's POV  
>I'd been having the same dream everytime I fell asleep ever since Brian told me that he'd wanted to kill me once. Maybe it was guilt making me have this dream, but it scared the crap out of me.<p>

It's fresman year. I walk up to Brian, standing at his locker. "Hey,"I tease him,"How's it goin'?" He ignores me, fiddling with his bookbag. "Hey,dipshit,"I yell,"I'm talking to you!" "I'm getting sick of your shit,"He says. I grab his neck. "What did you say to me,"I demand. He pushes me away, holding his bookbag in his hands. "I said..,"He says, and pulls a gun from his bag,pointing it at my nose,"I'm getting sick of your SHIT!" "Brian...wh..what are you doing,"I ask. I put my hands up. "Get on your knees,"He demands. "Brian..,"I stutter. "Do it,"He shouts. I see in his eyes that he is scared. "O..okay,"I say, and get on my knees. "Why did you choose me,"He asks. "Huh,"I ask. "Why did you choose me,"He asks again,"Out of all the other people you could've treated like shit, you chose me. Why?" "I...I don't know,"I say,"I guess you remind me of me." "Go on,"He says. "When my parents beat me..,"I start,"..I used to be small like you, okay? And I never fought back, like you, untill now." "What's your name,"He asks. "J..John,"I say. "John, you made my life hell,"He says,"This is payback." I see the tears stream down his face. _**I'd broken this kid.**_I close my eyes, preparing for the shot. I hear the gun go off...the bullet soar near my head...

Claire's POV  
>I was sitting in John's room when I heard John scream. He was having a nightmare, the same one for weeks. The one where Brian kills him. I sat by John and shook him awake.<br>"Claire.."John started.  
>"It's okay,"I assured him,"It was just a dream."<br>He nodded. I hugged him.  
>"Wh..where's Sammy,"He asked.<br>"She's on her date with Brian,"I said.  
>"Oh yeah,"He said,"I forgot about that. How long have I been asleep?"<br>"You fell asleep ten minutes into doing your homework,"I said.  
>He laughed.<br>"Do you like that Brian's dating Sammy,"I asked.  
>"Yeah,"He said,"It's just...I'm so used to protecting Sammy...I didn't mean to hurt him..I wasn't thinking."<br>John kissed me, then I walked downstairs. Sammy came in the door. She was smiling.  
>"Hey Claire,"She said,"Do you have any dresses I can borrow?"<br>"Yeah, I have some,"I said,"What for?"  
>"Well,"She said,"Brian asked me to prom."<br>"That's terrific,"I exclaimed,"I have a few dresses in my suitcase upstairs."

Sammy's POV  
>I followed Claire up to her and John's room.<br>"Oh hey Sammy,"John said as I walked in,"How'd your date go?"  
>"Great,"I said,"He asked me to prom."<br>"Did you say yes,"He asked.  
>"No, I turned him down,"I said sarcasticly,"Why would I want to go to prom with my boyfriend?"<br>"Very funny,"He said, and laughed.  
>Claire took some dresses out of the closet. They were hanging up. One was sparkly and golden, another was ruby red.<br>"I like the gold one,"I said.  
>"All right,"She said, and handed it to me,"Go try it on."<br>I carried the dress carefully to the bathroom, removed my shirt and pants, and put it on. I was about as tall as Claire. The dress fell gracefully over my body, the bottom stopping above my ankles. I noticed the zipper in the back.  
>"Claire,"I shouted.<br>"Yeah,"She asked.  
>"Will you zip this for me,"I asked.<br>She walked in and zipped the back zipper for me.  
>"You look great Sammy,"She said.<br>I looked in the mirror.  
>"Do you think Brian will..,"I started.<br>"Of course,"She said.  
>"Thank you Claire,"I said,"I...I guess I'll wear this dress."<br>"Okay,"She said, as she undid the zipper for me,"Just hang it up in your closet for now."  
>I nodded. Claire went back to John's room. I took off the dress, carefully putting it on its hanger, then putting my regular clothes back on. I took the dress and carried it to my room, hanging it up gently in the closet.<p>

Claire's POV  
>John wrapped his arms gently around me, kissing my neck.<br>"Claire,"He asked,"Are you going to prom with anyone?"  
>"Well,"I said,"I'm prom queen and Andy is prom king. But no, I'm not actually going with anyone."<br>"Would you like to go to prom with me, Claire,"He asked slyly.  
>"Why would I want to go to prom with my fiance,"I said sarcasticly.<br>He laughed. He removed his arms from around me and pushed me back on the bed gently, his long brown hair falling on my face. He kissed me.  
>"I love you Claire,"He said.<br>"I love you too John,"I said.  
>He sat up.<br>"Did Sammy choose that dress,"He asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"She looks great in it."<br>"That's good,"He said.  
>"John?"<br>"Yeah?"  
>"If you see them kissing at prom, don't kill Brian, okay?"<br>He laughed.  
>"Okay, I won't."<br>I kissed him on the cheek and stood up, walking toward the door.  
>"I'm hungry,"I said,"Want anything?"<br>"You shouldn't be walking around too much,"He said,"I'll get it. You sit down, rest."  
>"Thank you John,"I said.<br>"What'cha hungry for,"He asked.  
>"A sandwhich,"I said.<br>"You may have to be more specific,"He said jokingly.  
>"Bread...peanut butter...turkey..,"I said,"And some root beer."<br>"Strange...okay, I'll get it for you,"He said.  
>I smiled and nodded. John left for the kitchen. I lied on my side on John's bed. I was grateful that Andy's parents were letting me stay here. They knew about John and I getting married and about the baby. Before leaving my house, my parents at least let me take some things with me: some clothes, dresses, jewelry, makeup, my pillow and my blanket. I also brought my teddy bear, which I've had since I was little, that I so cleverly named Teddy. I took the teddy bear out of my suitcase and held it. I sat back on the bed, still holding it.<br>"Maybe I'll give you to our child,"I said, knowing it wasn't real.  
>"Talking to stuffed animals,"Someone asked.<br>I looked up. Sammy stood at the door.  
>"No,"I said, and set the bear down.<br>"It's fine,"She said,"I like to talk to inanimate objects too."  
>We both laughed.<br>"What did you want,"I asked politely.  
>"I wanted to talk to John,"She said,"But he's busy. Can I talk to you?"<br>"Sure,"I said,"You are my future sister in law after all."  
>She sat on the bed next to me, looking at my teddy bear.<br>"Can I see it,"She asked.  
>I handed it to her. She held it, examined it for a moment, then set it down.<br>"Fuzzy,"She commented.  
>"It's pretty old,"I said,"It used to be way fluffier."<br>"I'm nervous,"She said.  
>"How come,"I asked.<br>"What if Brian doesn't like me,"She said,"What if he doesn't like my dress?"  
>"He'll love it,"I said.<br>"But..."  
>"Brian likes you,"i assured her,"A lot..he really does."<br>"Do you think he could love me,"She asked.  
>"Of course,"I said,"Once he gets to know you first. John and I love each other."<br>"Yeah but..Brian and I haven't...done anything yet."  
>"Sammy, that's not what love is,"I said.<br>"I know,"She said,"Th..thanks Claire."  
>"You're welcome,"I said.<br>John came back in the room and handed me my sandwhich and soda.  
>"Hey Sammy,"John said,"Did you want something?"<br>"I was just talking to Claire,"Sammy said,"About prom."  
>Sammy left the room.<br>"Talking with Sammy,"He asked casually.  
>"Just trying to bond with my future sister in law,"I said.<br>"Terrific,"He said.

Sammy's POV

_Tuesday.._

I stood in front of the school, talking to my friends, Agitha(Aggy) and Brooklyn(Brooke), waiting for the first bell to ring.  
>"So, you're going to prom,huh,"Aggy asked.<br>"Yeah, with the nerd,"Brooke teased.  
>"At least I'm going to prom,"I teased back.<br>Brooke gave me a fake dirty look. Aggy and I laughed. The bell rang.  
>"See you guys second hour,"I said,"Bye."<br>"Bye,"Aggy said.  
>"Bye,"Brooke said.<br>I walked to my first hour class.

Brian's POV  
>I was walking to my first hour class when someone shoved me against a locker. I thought it was John at first, and was scared, knowing that he hit pretty hard. It wasn't him. It was a spikey blonde haired guy, about my age.<br>"Are you the shit who's dating my ex,"He demanded,"Brian."  
>I didn't move. He punched me in the stomuch, grabbing my shirt and shoving my head into the locker door.<br>"Are you Brian,"He demanded.  
>I nodded fearfully. He slammed my head into the locker door again.<br>"Hey asshole,"A voice said,"I thought you learned your lesson the first time. Or do I have to beat your ass again?"  
>I turned around and saw that it was John. I backed against the lockers, then noticed that John was talking to the kid. I relaxed. John grabbed the kid by his shirt collar and lifted him up.<br>"Stay the hell away from Brian,"John demanded,"And Sammy."  
>The kid nodded. John let go of him. The kid ran away.<br>"You okay Brian,"John asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"Sammy's ex?"<br>"Yeah,"He said,"Here, come to the bathroom."  
>"Why,"I asked.<br>"Your nose is bleeding,"He said.  
>He grabbed my arm and pulled me into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror, blood was running down my mouth. John handed me a wad of paper towels.<br>"Is it broken,"I asked worriedly.  
>"No, it doesn't look like it,"He said,"It should stop in a few minutes."<br>I nodded. I removed the wad of paper towels and dampened it under the sink faucet. I cleaned the blood off my face. My nose had stopped bleeding.  
>"Let me see,"John said.<br>I turned around and looked at him. He touched my nose.  
>"Ow!"<br>"It's not broken,"He said,"But it'll be sore for a while."  
>I walked to class.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>Art is my first hour class. Allison comes in sometimes on Tuesdays and Thursdays to work on independent study art. She sat at my table. I was working on a painting of a sunset.<br>"That looks good,"Allison said,"Your painting."  
>"Thanks,"I said,"What are you drawing?"<br>"It's Andy's portrait,"She said.  
>"Hmm..,"I said.<p>

* * *

><p>THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE PROM, AND WILL TAKE A WHILE TO WRITE.<p> 


	19. The Prom

Saturday, 3:30 P.M.  
>Andy, Allison, John, Brian, Claire and I were all at the house. We were going as a group to dinner before prom. We were going to Fazzio's, an fancy pizza place ,(well,fancy in my opinion), downtown.<br>"Shit,"Andy said,"Will we all fit in my car?"  
>"It holds five people,"I said.<br>"There's six of us,"Brian said.  
>"You can sit on my lap,"I said.<br>"Uh-uh,"John said.  
>"It'll work out,"I said.<br>Andy nodded. We weren't dressed for prom yet, we had on casual, yet somehow fancy clothes.  
>"Okay,"Andy said,"So should we go over the plan once again?"<br>"Why,"Claire asked,"We've heard it five times."  
>"Yeah, but the reader hasn't,"Andy said.<br>"Andy,"I shouted.  
>"Fine,"He said,"John, you say it."<br>"First, we eat dinner early,"John said,"Like right now. Then, when we're finished eating, we come back here, put our prom stuff on, and sit and talk for a while."  
>"Good,"Andy said,"All right,everyone. In the car."<br>We all piled into Andy's truck, Andy was the driver, Allison rode shotgun, and John, Claire, Brian, and I all squeezed into the back seat. We drove off to the pizza place.  
>"Hey Bri,"I said.<br>"We're gettin' pizza,"I said,"Know what that means?"  
>"What,"He asked.<br>"Pizza taco,"I said.  
>We both laughed. We finally arrive at Fazzio's. Andy and Allison walk in first, holding hands of course, then John and Claire, and finally, Brian and I. Andy got a booth for us. We were seated in a large, round-ish booth. We all got menus. Brian and I ordered strawberry sodas. Claire ordered root beer, John got orange, Andy and Allison got cola. Brian looked at his menu.<br>"Well Sammy,"He said,"There's no pizza taco, but there is taco pizza."  
>"Okay,"I said,"Brian and I will have taco pizza."<br>"Ten cheese pizzas,"Claire joked,"I'm starving."  
>The waiter came to give us our sodas and take our food orders.<br>"We'll have one taco pizza,"Andy said,"One cheese, and one pepperoni. And an order of cheesesticks. "  
>The waiter wrote down the orders and told us they'd be ready shortly, and took our menus. I took a large sip of my soda, then set it down.<br>"Thirsty much,"Andy joked.  
>"Yes, as a matter of fact, I am,"I said.<br>We finally got our pizzas. I took the taco pizza and folded it.  
>"Pizza taco,"I exclaimed, and took a large bite out of the crust.<br>"Gross,"Andy said.  
>I took the piece that I bit out of for myself, and handed a non-bitten piece to Brian. I turned my pizza around, crust first.<br>"Ahem.."I said,"Brian.."  
>He looked at me, then nodded in realization. He turned his pizza around, crust first. Claire looked at me and smiled, grabbing a piece of pizza and turning it around to match ours.<br>"John,"Claire said.  
>"Yeah,"John asked.<br>"Eat your pizza correctly,"Claire joked.  
>John looked at us. Then he turned the pizza around. Allison looked at Andy, who shrugged and did the same. Allison copied.<br>"Taste better this way,"Allison said.  
>We all laughed.<p>

_5:00 P.M._  
>"What time is it,"John asked.<br>"A little after five,"Claire said.  
>"I'd better get ready then,"I said.<br>"Okay then,"Claire said.  
>"Hey,"I said,"I don't want Brian to see me untill right before we leave okay?"<br>"Yeah,"Claire said,"You can stay in your room."  
>"Do you have any jewelry I can borrow,"I asked.<br>"Yeah sure,"She said,"I'll meet you in your room to help you with your dress and the jewelry."  
>"And hair?"<br>"Yeah."  
>I walked up to my room and undressed to put on the dress. Someone knocked at the door a moment later.<br>"Who is it,"I asked.  
>"It's Claire."<br>"Come in,"I said.  
>Claire walked in, carrying: jewelry, a makeup kit, a hair curler, a brush, a comb, and hair ties.<br>"How do you want your hair,"She asked.  
>"Fancy ponytail,"I said.<br>"I can do that,"She said,"I'll just tease your hair, no need for a curler."  
>She began brushing my hair to the side, proceeding to put my bunch of hair in a ponytail. She then teased the hair, by lifting it up and brushing it down.<br>"Okay,"She said,and handed me a mirror,"What do you think?"  
>"It looks great,"I exclaimed.<br>"Good,"She said.  
>She took out a sparkly necklace and handed it to me.<br>"Is that real diamonds,"I asked.  
>"Yeah,"She said.<br>"Sweet,"I said.  
>I took it and put it on.<br>"And these,"She said, and handed me matching earrings.  
>I put them on. She handed me her makeup.<br>"Do you want to do this,"She asked,"Or do you want me to?"  
>"I..I think you should do it,"I said,"I don't want to mess it up."<p>

Brian's POV  
>I'd just finished putting on my blue-ish black tux, that I borrowed from my dad. I walked out of the upstairs bathroom and sat on the couch in the living room. John sat next to me, also wearing a tux. I started to laugh.<br>"What are you laughing at,"He asked.  
>"Nothing..it's just..,"I said,"You..in a tux..unbelievable."<br>"Andy's parents rented it for me,"He said,"Of course, I threw in some cash."  
>"Looks good John,"I said,"Very..fancy."<br>He hit me lightly in the back of the head.  
>"Smartass,"He joked.<br>"Like my suit,"I asked.  
>"Yes, very fancy,"He said.<br>I laughed.  
>"Will Sammy like it,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"He said.

Sammy's POV  
>Claire was finishing off my makeup. She'd let me wear some perfume. There was a knock at the door.<br>"Who is it,"Claire asked.  
>"It's John, can I come in?"<br>"Sorry, I don't know anyone named John,"I joked.  
>"Very funny,"John said as he opened the door and walked in.<br>"Claire,"John said.  
>"Yeah,"Claire asked.<br>"Why is there a super model in my sister's room,"He asked.  
>I smiled, blushing a little.<br>"Gee, I don't know John,"Claire played along.  
>I ran to John like I was going to tackle him. He caught me and wrapped me in a big hug, lifting me off the floor a little, then setting me carefully back down.<br>"No need to squish me,"I said.  
>"Should I go get Allison and Andy,"Claire asked,"So they can see your dress before Brian."<br>"Allison,"I said,"But not Andy."  
>"She's got a little crush on Andy,"John said.<br>"I do not,"I exclaimed.  
>"I'll go get her,"Claire said.<br>I nodded.

Allison's POV  
>I'd just finished putting on my prom dress. It was a shining silvery gray. It felt strange to wear a dress. I was getting ready in the downstairs bathroom. I left the bathroom.<br>"Allison,"Andy shouted,"Are you ready?"  
>"Yeah,"I said, and went up to his room to see him.<br>"You look terrific,"He said.  
>"Thanks,"I said,"So do you."<br>Claire stood in the doorway.  
>"Hey Allison,"Claire said,"Wanna see Sammy?"<br>"Sure,"I said.  
>"Andy can't come,"She said.<br>"Why not,"Andy asked.  
>"Sammy doesn't want you to see untill later,"Claire said,"She's got a little crush on you, Andy."<br>I smirked. I followed her to Sammy's room. Sammy sat on her bed, sketching on a notebook. She looked up at me.  
>"Wow Allison,"She said,"Great dress."<br>"Thanks,"I said,"So I hear that you've got a crush on Andy."  
>"Meh..."She shrugged.<p>

_6:00 p.m._  
>"We should get going,"Sammy said.<br>"All right,"Claire said,"I'll see if everyone is in the living room."  
>I followed Claire out the door.<br>"Stay here Sammy,"Claire said,"I'll have John come get you in a minute."  
>Sammy nodded. I followed Claire down the stairs, where John, Andy, and Brian were waiting on the couch.<p>

Brian's POV  
>"You ready to see Sammy,"John asked me.<br>"Y..yeah,"I said.  
><em><strong>I hope I look good enough<strong>_. John walked upstars.

Sammy's POV  
>"Sammy,"John shouted, and knocked on the door.<br>I got up and opened the door slightly.  
>"Time to go,"He said.<br>"Uh..I'm not ready,"I said.  
>"Let's go,"He said.<br>"But..."  
>"Come on,"He said,"I'll walk with you down the stairs."<br>I followed John down the stairs. John hurried over to Claire, holding her hand as I stood at the bottom step. Andy held the hand of Allison. All of them smiling at me, except for Brian. Brian's blonde hair was spiked up and gelled a little. His suit shined blue off him. My eyes widened at how handsome he looked. Brian wasn't smiling because he couldn't. And he couldn't because his jaw dropped.

Brian's POV  
>Sammy looked stunning. Her brown hair, shiny, teased off to the side. Her skin, soft in appearance, sparkling jewelry, and that dress...that dress shimmered off her body like sunshine.<br>"Your jaw's gonna fall off if you're not careful,"John said.  
>I closed my eyes and smiled.<br>"Wow...,"I said,"Just...wow..."  
>"You like it,"Sammy asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said,barely able to speak,"You look...wow.."  
>I walked closer to her. Her eyes stood out even more. She was wearing perfume, something vanilla, just the right amount.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I put out my hand and Brian took it, gently pulling me toward him. The cologne he was wearing smelt amazing, I inhaled deeply through my nose.<br>"You smell amazing,"I slipped.  
>"You too,"Brian said.<br>"Enough sniffing each other,"John said,"Is everyone ready?"  
>We all nodded.<br>"Let's go then,"Andy said.  
>We all got into Andy's car, in the same seats as last time. Brian put his arm around me.<p>

_7:00 p.m._  
>We went into the school, to the gym where the prom was held. Claire and John walked through the double doors into the gym first, then Andy and Allison, then Brian and I. The gym was decorated with prom banners and balloons all over the place. A fog machine made the floor foggy. Streamers hung from the walls. Brian held my hand as we walked to a corner of the gym, hidden behind a small crowd of people.<br>"I don't know how to dance, Brian,"I said.  
>"Neither do I,"He said.<br>We both laughed. A song played. Brian put his arms around my waist. I rested my hands behind his neck.  
>"You know this is a rock song, right,"Brian said.<br>"I don't care,"I said.  
>He nodded. He pulled me closer. I closed my eyes. A rock song was playing, but I didn't notice.<p>

Brian's POV  
>I held Sammy close to me. I closed my eyes too. We may well have been the only two people on the dance floor, the only two people in the building, the only two people in the world. <em><strong>The world could end, and I wouldn't notice.<strong>_ I didn't notice the music playing, only imagined ballroom music as Sammy and I swayed back and forth. _**Nothing else existed at the moment**_.

Sammy's POV  
>I let myself lean toward Brian, my lips colliding with his. He opened his eyes, smiling. I pulled away from him, smiling also. I opened my mouth, but couldn't say anything, so he leaned forward and kissed me again.<br>"Good answer,"I whispered in his ear.  
>I grabbed his hand and led him to the doorway where we came in.<br>"Where are we going,"He asked.  
>"You'll see,"I said.<br>I led him out to the parking lot. I walked past some cars, looking inside of them untill I found what I was looking for. I walked around the car, looking for an entrance.  
>"What are you doing,"Brian asked.<br>"Seeing if it's locked,"I said.  
>It wasn't. I opened the passenger side door, and grabbed the six pack of beer someone left in the back seat.<br>"Let's go,"I said.  
>"Sammy,"Brian exclaimed,"We can't drink, we're not.."<br>"Shh,"I demanded,"Now follow me."  
>We walked to the football field and stood behind the bleachers, out of view. I took one and handed one to Brian, putting the remaining four on the ground. I opened mine.<br>"Bottoms up,"I said.  
>"Sammy..."He started.<br>"Come on,"I said.  
>He sighed and opened his can. He drank a large sip.<br>"Hmm..."He said.  
>"It's an acquired taste,"I said, and took a drink.<p>

Claire's POV  
><em>8:00 p.m.<em>  
>It was time for the prom king and queen to dance together. The room cleared the way as Andy and I gathered in the middle of the gym, a spotlight on us. A slow song played as Andy and danced. Dancing with Andy was different than dancing with John. It was fun, but nothing was there. After the dance, everyone clapped and I went back to where John and I were.<br>"Hey prom queen,"John whispered,"Wanna get out of here?"  
>"And go where,"I asked.<br>"The storage closet,"He said,"Like last time?"  
>I turned to him and ran my fingers through his hair.<br>"Let's go,"I whispered in his ear.  
>We walked to the closet John and I were in last time.<br>"How are you gonna get this dress off,"I asked.  
>"I like a challenge,"He said.<p>

Andy's POV  
>"Did you like the dance,"Allison asked.<br>"It was okay,"I said,"Not nearly as fun as dancing with you."  
>She smiled. I kissed her.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"Slow down Brian,"I said,"You've had four cans."<br>He laughed. He leaned forward and kissed me.  
>"You reek Bri,"I said,"Like beer."<br>We both laughed as I finished off my second can.  
>"Hey,"Brian said,"Let's go in that storage shed."<br>"Why,"I asked.  
>"You know,"He said, raising his eyebrows.<br>"Don't be a perv, Bri,"I said.  
>He burst into laughter.<br>"There's something I don't get though,"I said.  
>"What's that,"He asked.<br>"Why my parents like this shit so much,"I said.  
>He shrugged. I laughed.<br>"Should we go back in there,"I asked.  
>"I can't get up,"He said.<p>

I helped him up. He followed me, slightly wobbly, back into the gym. Another slow song was playing now. Brian and I held each other again, swaying back and forth. No one seemed to notice that we were slightly drunk. I guessed we weren't the only ones. We stayed like that. The world disappeared again. _**We were alone, alone in a room full of people**_. My head was spinning, and it wasn't just the beer. _**I realized that I was...**_

Brian's POV  
><em><strong>Falling for her. I'm falling for her. I'm in love. She's just so goddamn beautiful. I love being around her<strong>_.  
>"I love you,"I slipped, the alcohol was getting to me.<br>I covered my mouth. She removed my hand from my mouth.  
>"I'm sorry,"I said.<br>"Don't be,"She said,"I love you too."  
>We kissed again.<p>

Allison's POV  
>8:30 p.m.<br>Andy left to use the bathroom. I noticed sammy and Brian behind a small crowd. I went over to talk to them. They looked different.  
>"Are you guys drunk,"I asked Sammy.<br>"No,"Sammy said.  
>"You smell like beer,"I said.<br>"And you smell like...shoe,"Brian said, and burst out laughing.  
>Sammy sighed.<br>"We stole a six pack from a car,"She said,"Don't tell anyone, okay?"  
>"Fine, I won't,"I said.<br>"He's more drunk than I am,"She said,"He had four cans."  
>Brian and Sammy laughed. Andy came back in the room.<br>"I gotta go,"I said,"Andy's back. You two stay out of trouble, okay?"  
>She nodded. I walked back with Andy.<p>

Claire's POV  
><em>9:00 p.m.<em>  
>I'd put my dress back on and was sitting on a chair. John sat in a chair next to me.<br>"You okay,"He asked.  
>"Yeah, I'm fine,"I said.<br>"You've been quiet,"He said,"Is it me, Claire?"  
>"No,"I said.<br>"Claire, you're already pregnant,"He said,"It's not like you can get pregnant while you already are."  
>"I know,"I said,"It's just.."<br>"You're at a loss for words,"He said with mock pride.  
>"Yeah, something like that,"I said.<br>He stroked my hair. I smiled.  
>"Should we go back in there,"He asked.<br>"I don't know,"I said,"Will other people think we.."  
>I stopped myself.<br>"Do you think I really care,"He asked.  
>I smirked.<br>"I don't,"I said, and got up.  
>He stood up and I followed him back to the gym.<p>

Brian's POV  
><em>10:00 p.m.<em>  
>"Sammy,"I said, pulling my hands away from her.<br>"Yeah,"Sammy asked.  
>"My parents want me to get home at ten,"I said.<br>"Why didn't you tell me that earlier,"She asked.  
>"I forgot,"I said,"Now I'm late."<br>I kissed her.  
>"I'm sorry,"I said,"I have to go. Goodbye."<br>"Goodbye,"She said.  
>I ran out of the gym, then out of the school. I walked to Andy.<br>"Hey Andy,"I said.  
>"Yeah,"Andy asked.<br>"Will you take me home,"I asked,"I was supposed to be home by ten."  
>"Sure,"He said,"Allison, do you want to come?"<br>"Sure,"Allison said.  
>I followed Allison and Andy to the car. They drove me to my house.<br>"Will you do me a favor,"I asked.  
>"What is it,"Andy asked.<br>"Will you and Allison stay close by,"I asked,"Just park the car at the end of the block or something, then follow me to the house. Maybe wait outside.."  
>"Why,"Allison asked.<br>"My parents usually only verbally hit me,"I said,"But lately, since the flare gun incident, it's been physical."  
>"They're beating you,"Andy asked.<br>"No,"I said,"Just hitting me. I'm just scared..please?"  
>"Okay,"Andy said.<br>Andy parked the truck at the end of the block. We got out and they followed me untill I got two houses down from my house.  
>"Stay here,"I said.<br>I walked into my house. I snuck up to my room and changed into my regular clothes. I went out to tell Andy and Allison that everything was okay, when my father stopped me.  
>"Where the hell have you been,"He demanded.<br>"I'm sorry,"I said,"I forgot."  
>He got closer to me. I started shaking with fear.<br>"Have you been drinking,"He demanded.  
>"No,"I said.<br>He slapped me.  
>"Fucking idiot,"He shouted,"Are you trying to kill all your brain cells."<br>"No,"I said stupidly.  
>"Shut up,"He shouted.<br>I flinched as he reached his hand up again. I backed away. He crumpled his fist and punched me in the mouth.  
>"Get out,"He yelled.<br>I started walking toward my room. He grabbed me and shoved my face into the front door.  
>"Outside,"He demanded,"I won't have a drunk in my house! Now get out,and DON'T come back! "<br>I opened the door and walked outside.

Andy's POV  
>I could hear shouting from Brian's house. I was worried.<br>"Come on,"I said to Allison,"Let's see what's going on."  
>We went toward his house. I saw Brian sitting on his front porch, his head buried in his hands. I ran up to him, Allison followed.<br>"Brian,"I said quietly.  
>He looked up.<br>"He punched me,"Brian said.  
>Brian was quivering slightly.<br>"Wanna go back to the prom,"I asked.  
>"I guess,"He said,"I can't go back inside. He kicked me out."<br>He followed us back to the car. We drove back to the school.  
>"Will you go get Sammy,"Brian asked,"I don't want to go in."<br>I nodded.  
>"Okay,"I said.<p>

Brian's POV  
>I put my head against the window and tried not to cry. I was still shaking a little.<br>"Brian,"A voice shouted.  
>I crouched down, looking out the window. It was Sammy. I opened the door and got out.<br>"Brian, are you okay,"Sammy asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>"What happened,"She asked.  
>"He punched me,"I said,"My father. Then he kicked me out."<br>"I'm sorry,"She said.  
>"It's okay,"I said,"Maybe I should go back home..."<br>"No, it'll only get worse,"She said.  
>"It's only a month untill I graduate,"I said,"And then a few months of summer before I move to college. I'll be fine."<br>"I don't want you getting hurt,"She said.  
>I nodded. She hugged me tightly.<p>

Sammy's POV  
><em>11:00 p.m.<em>  
>Prom was over. We all got back into the car. Andy took Allison back to her house and dropped her off. The rest of us went back to Andy's house. Andy's parents were waiting in the living room watching tv. John snuck Brian in through the back door. Andy and Claire told Andy's parents about prom while I walked upstairs after John and Brian. They went into John's room. I stood by the door, waiting for Andy and Claire. After a few minutes, they came in the room.<br>"We told my parents you were really tired,"Andy said,"I'm gonna go to bed now, goodnight everyone."  
>Andy left the room, closing the door behind him.<br>"Goodnight Brian,"I said quietly,"Goodnight Claire..John."  
>"'Night sis,"John said.<br>"Goodnight Sammy,"Claire and Brian said.  
>I went back to my room and carefully changed out of the dress, hanging it up on the hanger in my closet. I put on my pajamas. I went to the bathroom and removed the makeup from my face. I took off the jewelry and the hairtie out and put them in my pajama pocket. I walked back to John's room and knocked on the door. Claire opened. I handed her the necklace, earrings, and hairtie.<br>"You can keep the hairtie,"She said,and handed it back to me,"I've got plenty of them."  
>I nodded and went back to my room. I set the hairtie on my dresser. I lied on my bed, pulled up the cover, and went to sleep.<p>

John's POV  
>Claire went to the bathroom to change. She came back a few minutes later, in her pajamas, and hung her dress up in the closet. Her dress was the red one, by the way. She sat on the bed next to me. Brian lied on the floor on his side.<p>

"Are you okay Brian,"Claire asked.  
>"Yeah,"Brian said.<br>Someone knocked at the door.  
>"Yeah,"I asked.<br>"It's Rick. Would your friend like a sleeping bag?"  
>Rick opened the door.<br>"How'd you know,"I asked.  
>"You're not very quiet,"Rick said,"Why is he here?"<br>"His dad kicked him out,"I said,"We wanted to let him sleep here for the night."  
>"Okay,"Rick said, and tossed me a sleeping bag.<br>I gave the sleeping bag to Brian, who unrolled it and got into it.  
>"He can stay here for tonight I guess,"Rick said.<br>"Thank you,"Brian said.  
>"Well goodnight,"Rick said, and left the room.<p>

I quickly changed into my pajamas and hung up my suit. Brian was turned away from us, crying. Claire lied down and was going to sleep.  
>"Brian,"I said quietly.<br>"Y..yeah,"He asked without turning around.  
>"Are you going back home tomorrow,"I asked.<br>"I..I don't know,"He said,"They might not let me."  
>"It'll be okay Bri,"I said.<br>"Yeah,"He said.


	20. Brian and Sammy

Brian's POV  
>I had breakfast at Andy's house. My mother called Andy's house and told me to come home.<br>"Don't leave Brian,"Sammy said.  
>"I have to go home Sammy,"I said.<br>She frowned.  
>"Okay,"She said,"Bye."<br>"Bye Sammy,"I said, and kissed her.  
>I said bye to the rest of them and Rick drove me to my house. My mother was waiting in the living room.<br>"Don't you EVER do anything like that again,"She yelled.  
>I nodded. I wanted to tell her that my dad had punched me, but I didn't. My father came in from the kitchen as I turned for my room. I didn't want to be hit again, but I wasn't going to run. I was going to stand up for myself.<br>"Leave me alone,"I said.  
>He grabbed me. I pulled away.<br>"You're NOT going to hit me again."I said.  
>"What the hell Brian,"He demanded.<br>"You know DAMN well what I mean,"I said,"I'm sick of it. I'm sick of being scared. Scared to mess up, scared to be yelled at, hit, scared of you!"  
>"If you don't like it here,"He shouted,"Then you can get the hell out!"<br>"I will,"I yelled.  
>I went upstairs to get my things from my room. I was crying while I was packing my things. I didn't want to leave, but I couldn't take it anymore. I was tired of how they treated me. My mother was shouting at me the whole time. I was glad when she left for work, but scared that my father was still here. I got my things in a bag and started walking out the door.<br>"You're worthless Brian,"My father yelled,"You'll never be anything."  
>"Stop it,"I said.<br>The front door was open. He shoved me outside, throwing my bag at me. Once I regained my balance, I picked up my bag and walked down the sidewalk. I got a few blocks before I burst into tears. I wiped off my tears and continued walking. I went the rest of the way to Andy's house. I didn't knock on the door though. I just sat outside, on the porch. I held my bag closely, like a pillow.

Sammy's POV  
>I went outside to sit on the porch when I saw Brian. I sat by him.<br>"Hi Sammy,"Brian said.  
>"What's wrong,"I asked.<br>"They kicked me out,"He said,"For real this time."  
>I put my arm around him. He leaned on my shoulder.<br>"You'll be okay Brian,"I said.  
>He nodded.<br>"I stood up to him,"He said,"I told him he wasn't going to hit me again."  
>"That's great Bri,"I said.<br>"It did get worse since the flare gun Sammy,"He said.  
>He rolled up his shirt sleeve, revealing a few small bruises.<br>"They didn't let up,"He said,"They'd hit me for getting a B. Or an A-. I stopped bringing home my grades."  
>"Did they belt you,"I asked.<br>"No,"He said,"They just hit me, punched me in my arms and stomuch. They'd never been that violent with me."  
>"Why didn't you tell me,"I asked.<br>"I thought they would stop,"He said,"I was scared. For the past two months, I've been more scared than usual."  
>He lifted his shirt a little to show me a medium size purple bruise on his side. I gasped.<br>"Your dad,"I asked.  
>"My mom actually,"He said,"She kicked me in the side while I was sitting on the floor."<br>"A hundred times?"  
>"No..not that many,"He said,"Five...maybe ten. I don't know why the bruise is this big."<br>"It would never get better Brian,"I said.  
>He put his shirt down, looking at me with interest.<br>"Your parents wouldn't stop hitting you,"I said,"When my parents started hitting me, I thought it would stop too. It never did. It only got worse."  
>Brian began to cry. I grabbed him and held him closely.<br>"I...why..why'd they hit me,"He asked.  
>"I don't know,"I said,"But It's not your fault Bri."<br>Brian nodded.  
>"Wanna go in the house,"I asked.<br>"No, I'll just stay here,"He said.  
>"Then so will I,"I said.<br>He sat up, looking at me.  
>"Why,"She asked.<br>"I said I wouldn't leave you again, Brian,"I said.  
>He smiled. I kissed him gently on the lips.<br>"I know you guys are dating,"Someone said,"But do you have to make out twenty four seven?"  
>I looked up. John stood there, holding a bag.<br>"Hey John,"I said,"What's that?"  
>"Doughnuts,"John said,"Claire wanted some."<br>"Can I have one,"I asked.  
>He took one out and handed me half, putting the other half back in the bag.<br>"None for you lover boy,"John joked.  
>I gave Brian a peice, he took it and ate it. I ate my peice.<br>"Maple,"Brian said.  
>"I gotta go,"John said,"And stop making out for once."<br>John smirked.  
>"You and Claire do it all the time,"I said.<br>"But we're married,"He said.  
>Brian got on one knee in a mock proposal.<br>"Come on, marry me Sammy,"Brian joked.  
>"Okay Brian,"I played along.<br>"You guys are hilarious,"John said sarcasticly.  
>John went inside. Brian and I laughed. I put my arm around him right under his ribs. He winced. I moved my arm away.<br>"Sorry, I forgot,"I said.  
>"It's okay,"Brain said.<br>"Do you want to go inside,"I asked,"To my room?"  
>Brian nodded. We went into my room and sat on the ground. Brian brought his bag.<br>"Are you still scared, Brian,"I asked.

Brian's POV  
>"I'm not,"I said.<br>I'm terrified. I was trembling on the inside, trying for Sammy's sake to keep it together. Two months. They'd been hitting me for two months. Not that I hadn't been hit before, but not like this.  
>"I let them hit me,"I said,"I should've fought back."<br>"No,"She said,"It only makes it worse. Believe me."  
>"I didn't tell anyone,"I said,"Not even my friends. I was in denial. I didn't want to believe they were hitting me."<br>"Brian, you're not going back there,"She said,"I'll hide you in the closet if I have to."  
>I smiled. I lied my head on the bag.<br>"What's in that bag anyways,"She asked.  
>"Clothes,"I said,"A jacket. A blanket."<br>"I know what you're going through,Brian,"She said.  
>I nodded. She sat by me and put her arm around my shoulder.<br>"Wanna go talk to John,"She asked.  
>"No,"I said,"Not right now. I want to talk to you."<br>"About what,"She asked.  
>"First off, my head is killing me,"I said,"Second, I'm tired."<br>I barely slept at all. I didn't get to sleep until three in the morning.  
>"I'd say so,"She joked,"You had four beers."<br>"Shh,"I said,"I don't want John to hear."  
>She laughed.<br>"Was that your first time drinking,"She asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"Was it yours?"<br>"No,"She said,"I've been to a few parties."  
>"Does your brother know,"I asked.<br>"He doesn't know anything,"She joked.  
>I lied my head down on the bag and closed my eyes.<p>

Claire's POV  
>John and I were getting ready to go meet my grandparents. Since my parents disowned me, my grandparents decided to help out me and John. Since they'd had my mother before marrige, they decided it would be hypocritical to cut us off.<br>"What if they don't like me,"John asked.  
>"They'll like you,"I said.<br>"They'll hate me,"He said.  
>I put on my earrings as John finished putting on his shoes.<br>"Ready to go,"John asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>John and I walked downstairs, into the living room. Kim was letting us borrow the car.

Sammy's POV  
>I shook Brian awake from what sounded like a bad dream. He was shaking when he got up. He stood up and held me closely.<br>"You're alive,"He said,"In my dream, you died."  
>I helped him stand up. I kissed him on the lips, grabbing his hair. I walked quietly to the door and locked it. I went back to Brian. He let me lift his shirt off. I touched his bruise lightly.<br>"You said you love me Brian,"I asked.  
>"It wasn't bullshit Samantha,"He said.<br>"I know,"I said,"I love you too."  
>"Sammy,"He asked,"Are...are you..?"<br>"Yes,"I said.  
>I let him take my shirt off.<br>"I..I don't know what I'm doing,"He said.  
>"Me either,"I said.<br>We took our own pants off.  
>"Don't be scared Brian,"I said.<br>He looked away, embarrased.  
>"Brian,"I grabbed his hips,"It's okay."<br>He nodded, as I removed his boxers. I stepped back and gasped.  
>"Wh...what,"He asked.<br>"How are you still a virgin,"I sqeaked.  
>"Is...that..good or bad,"He asked.<br>I nodded.  
>"It's good,"I said,"Really good."<p>

* * *

><p><em><strong>SINCE I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT SEX, HERE'S A POV SWITCH.<strong>_

* * *

><p><span>Allison's POV<span>  
>I was still tired from last night. I stayed up all night, daydreaming about Andy. I think I'm in love. Andy had wrestling practice today, so we couldn't hang out today. I looked at my sketch of him in my sketchbook. I was aware of how well I could draw. The art teacher suggested that I apply for an art college in Chicago. I turned the page and begun to draw. It was a sunset, one I'd seen outside my house countless times, but never really looked at until now. I'd been to Andy's house but he'd never been to mine. I didn't want him to see where I lived. He's told me a bunch of times that he didn't care where I lived and liked me for me.<br>Suddenly, my mother opened the door.  
>"Hey,"She yelled,"Did you steal my vodka?!"<br>_**I have a name.**_  
>"No,"I yelled back.<br>She slammed the door and left. I sighed and continued drawing my picture.

Sammy's POV  
>I was catching my breath. <em><strong>I think my eyes actually rolled into the back of my head<strong>_. I know my toes curled up. Brian and I were lying on the bed now.  
>"You scratched the sh*t out of my back,"He joked,"You know that?"<br>"Sorry,"I said.  
>"It's okay,"He said,"Kinda liked it."<br>I laughed.  
>"Brian,"I said.<br>"Yeah,"He asked.  
>"Promise you won't leave me,"I asked.<br>"I promise,"He said.  
>He held me in his arms.<br>"I don't just tell anyone that I love them,"I said,"I meant it when I said I loved you. I do Brian."  
>"Did you..."He started, then sighed,"Did I hurt you?"<br>"No,"I said,"Not really.."  
>"Good,"He said.<br>Then I remembered what happened to Claire her first time...  
>"Oh shit,"I exclaimed,"What did we just do?!"<br>"What's wrong Sammy,"Brian asked.  
>"Claire got pregnant her first time,"I exclaimed,"What if..."<br>"Then I'll stay,Samantha,"He said.  
>"You will,"I asked.<br>"I love you Sammy,"He said,"That wasn't just some bull to get you into bed. I really do love you."  
>I snuggled closer to him.<p>

I talked to Brooke and Aggy in the morning before school again.  
>"How was it,"Brooke asked.<br>"Like heaven,"I joked.  
>"How big was..."Aggy started.<br>"Huge,"I said.  
>I smiled and we all laughed. The bell to go to first hour rang.<p>

Brian's POV  
>I sat in first hour with my friend Ryan.<br>"So I heard you went to prom with Samantha,"He asked.  
>"No shit,"I said,"We're dating."<br>"Did you bang her,"He asked.  
>Ryan has a very dirty mind.<br>"No I didn't bang her,"I said.  
>I wanted to tell him that I'd actually slept with her. Actually, I wanted to shout the loss of my virginity from the rooftops, but I didn't want to tarnish Sammy's reputation.<br>"You're lying,"He said.  
>"Shut up,"I said.<br>Sleeping with Sammy made me love her even more. I'd already loved her before, but now, I felt so close to her. And yesterday, she dug her nails into my back, and I loved it.

I met Sammy after school in shop class to work on the elephant lamp. She helped me hook up the wiring.  
>"Brian, this yellow wire is frayed,"She said,"It's defective."<br>"What are you saying,"I asked.  
>"It wasn't your fault,"She said,"None of it. You got a broken wire."<br>I stared in shock. She removed the wire and threw it away. She took out another wire, inspected it, and handed me the wire and the elephant. I attached the wire and reattached the trunk. I pulled the trunk, nothing happened. I failed. I put my head on the table.  
>"Brian, don't give up,"She said,"You forgot the lightbulb."<br>I looked up. She turned the elephant upside down, unscrewing and replacing the lightbulb with a new one.  
>"Try it now,"She said.<br>I pulled the trunk. Light illuminated from the creature, a dim, but distinct glow, enough to see in the dark. I smiled.  
>"This thing has been the bane of my exisistence,"I said.<br>I ran and hugged Sammy.  
>"Thank you so much,"I said.<br>I set the elephant on the teacher's desk, with a note that said: **It lights up now.-Brian Johnson**. Andy offered to take Sammy and I home, but we chose to walk.  
>"Did you brag about what we did to anyone,"She asked.<br>"No,"I said,"I didn't want to ruin your reputation. Did you?"  
>"I told my friends,"She said.<br>"Just hope John never finds out,"I said,"He'll kill me."  
>"He'll kill me too,"She said.<br>"But he will really kill me,"I joked,"And leave my body in the woods to be eaten by cyotes."  
>"I think we should tell John,"Sammy said.<br>"Are you insane,"I exclaimed jokingly.  
>"I mean about the bruise,"She said.<br>"Oh,"I said,"I guess so."  
>We went into John's room when we got home.<br>"Hey John,"Sammy said,"Where's Claire?"  
>"At her grandparent's house,"John said.<br>"Oh, you met them,"Sammy said,"How'd it go?"  
>"Great,"John said,"They actualy liked me."<br>"Show him Brian,"Sammy said.  
>I rolled up my shirt, showing John the bruise below my ribs. He looked concerned.<br>"What happened,"John asked.  
>"My mom,"I said,"She kicked me a few times."<br>I put my shirt down. I told John about what happened to me.  
>"Two months,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said.  
>I grabbed Sammy's hand. I smiled.<p> 


	21. John's Birthday

Sammy's POV  
>"Come on John,"I yelled,"We're gonna be late!"<br>John came into the living room.  
>"We're just going to her grandparent's house,"John said,"Calm down."<br>John, Brian and I got into the car. Andy let us borrow his car.  
>"Where's Andy and his parents,"John asked.<br>"Wrestling meet,"I said.  
>That was a lie. Andy and his parents, along with Claire and Allison, were all at Claire's Grandparent's house. Claire and I had planned a suprise party for John's 18th birthday. When we got to the house, John walked in first, everyone jumped up and greeted him. John had a playful smirk on his face. He looked back at me.<br>"Did you plan this,"John asked.  
>"Kind of,"I said,and pointed to Claire,"I can't take all the credit."<br>Claire hugged John, kissing him on the cheek.  
>"Happy birthday John,"Claire said.<br>"Yeah,happy birthday John,"I said.  
>John hugged me.<br>"I love you sis,"He said,"Love you too Claire."  
>"Love you too John,"Claire and I said.<br>I held Brian's hand tightly. I sat on a plush couch with Brian.  
>"What's on your mind, Sammy,"Brian asked.<br>What's on MY mind? You are. Why are you still here? Why haven't you left me yet?  
>"Nothing,"I said,"I was just...remembering that paper John has to fill out. For me to skip a grade."<br>I half-expected him to see through my lie. Luckily though, he didn't, and simply nodded.  
>"How'd you do on the elephant,"I asked.<br>"Huh?"  
>"The lamp."<br>"Oh. Yeah. I got a B."  
>He looked away from me, seemingly dissapointed.<br>"Did you call your parents,"I asked.  
>"Yeah,"He said.<br>"Why,"I asked.  
>"I wanted them to be proud of me,"He said,"I wanted them to know I wasn't a failure. I wanted them to know it wasn't my fault."<br>"What happened?"  
>"They hung up,"He said,"I'm still a failure Sammy. It's all I'll ever be."<br>"Stop torturing yourself Brian,"I said.  
>He looked at me and nodded.<br>"I wasn't scared Brian,"I said.  
>"When,"He asked.<br>"When we were in my room,"I said,"I wasn't scared. I felt safe, protected."  
>"That's good,"He said.<br>"Brian, I've been so afraid to date anyone. So afraid to get close. I didn't want to get hurt again. I wouldn't let it happen again. There was a wall. I built a wall, to protect myself."  
>"We all have walls to protect ourselves,"He said.<br>"I know. And you broke mine down."  
>He could leave at any second. Brian doesn't know my heart is broken. What will he do when he finds out? Will he leave? Or is he going to fix the peices?<br>"Hey,"Andy said as he walked to us,"Time for cake."  
>I looked at Brian and smirked.<br>"Don't even think about it,"Andy said,"There will be no cake taco, or ice cream taco."  
>"There's ice cream,"I asked.<br>Brian, Andy and I joined everyone at the table, where Claire's grandmother was cutting the cake. John got the first peice. I snuck up behind John, giving everyone the shh signal and shoved his face into his cake slice. John wiped his face off and turned around.  
>"Come here,"He joked, grabbing me.<br>He wiped the cake icing on his hands onto my face.  
>"That's better,"He joked.<br>We all laughed. John went back to eating his cake, getting a scoop of ice cream. The table in the kitchen was large, at least ten seats. Everyone sat at the table, except Brian and I. We got our cake slice and ice cream and snuck off to the plush couch. I ate my ice cream first.  
>"Know what we should do,"I asked.<br>"What,"Brian asked.  
>"Feed each other cake,"I said,"Like in weddings."<br>He smiled and took the fork, scooping a forkful, and pointing it near me.  
>"Open,"He said.<br>I opened my mouth, taking the bite of cake. I repeated the process with him. We did that untill the cake was gone. Brian ate his mostly melted ice cream scoop. We took the plates back in the kitchen. John and Claire were at the table. Everyone else had went to the living room to mingle.  
>"Where'd you two go,"John asked.<br>"Sitting on the couch,"I said.  
>John nodded.<br>"We're opening presents soon,"Claire said.  
>"Ohh..what'd you get me,"John asked.<br>John looked up at Claire, who kissed him on the lips.  
>"You'll just have to see,"Claire said.<br>We opened the presents in the living room. Andy gave John a card with a hundred dollars.  
>"You're hard to shop for,"Andy said.<br>John opened his next present, from Andy's parents. It included an address.  
>"What's this,"John asked.<br>"Your new apartment,"Kim said,"It's a house actually. Your first months rent is already paid for. Only five hundred a month."  
>"Is it a.."John started.<br>"It's a great house,"Kim said,"In a good neighboorhood. You can move in in the next couple weeks."  
>"I..I..thank you,"John's face lit up.<br>John ran and hugged Kim and Rick. John was crying, tears of happiness. He opened his next gift, from Allison. A pair of leather gloves. John thanked her and went to the next gift, from Brian.  
>"What'd you get him,"I whispered to Brian.<br>"Walkman,"Brian whispered.  
>John opened the present. There was a card.<br>"'I told you I forgave you, Brian Johnson',"John read the card,"Sweet."  
>"And now,"John said,"For Sammy's gift. Drum roll please."<br>Drum roll...John opened the gift, pulling out a genuine leather jacket.  
>"Sammy.."He said.<br>"It's not an apartment or a walkman but.."I started.  
>He put on the jacket.<br>"I love it,"He exclaimed.  
>"A gift for you,"I said,"Courtesy of me, and Claire."<br>I smiled. John hugged me.  
>I didn't tell him that Claire had sold her tennis bracelet to pay for the three hundred dollar leather jacket. I'd went with her to the pawn shop, pleading with her not to sell the bracelet. She told me that it didn't mean anything to her, just a bracelet her parents got for her.<p>

Brian's POV  
>We went back to Andy's house after the party was over.<br>"Hey Brian,"John said,"I need to talk to you."  
>He knows. I went into the kitchen with him. He knows..I don't know how, but he knows...<br>"Thanks for the walkman,"John said.  
>"Yeah,"I said,"No problem."<br>He patted me on the back. I sighed with relief. I went back to the couch, putting up my feet and flipping on the tv. That night, I slept in Sammy's room. Apparently,John trusted me that much.  
>"He knows,"I whispered to Sammy.<br>"What do you mean he knows,"Sammy whispered,"How?"  
>"I don't know,"I said,"I just have this feeling."<br>"Good night Brian,"She said.  
>"Nite Sammy,"I said.<p>

John's POV  
>Claire lied next to me in bed.<br>"Hey Claire,"I asked.  
>"Yeah John,"She asked.<br>"Do you think Brian and Sammy have.."I started.  
>"Probably not,"Claire said,"Sammy's afraid of intimacy..well sort of."<br>"Yeah, you're probably right,"I said.


	22. The House

Brian's POV  
>I woke up in the morning at about six. I'd slept in a sleeping bag, on the ground in Sammy's room. Sammy was still sleeping. I gently nudged her awake.<br>"Hi Brian,"She whispered.  
>She sat up. I sat by her on the bed.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I kissed him.<br>"Brian,what are you thinking about,"I asked.  
>"Nothing,"He said, kissing me again.<br>"You want to do it again, don't you,"I asked.  
>"I don't know what you're talking about,"He said.<br>"Brian..."I said.  
>"I don't want to pressure you Sammy,"He said.<br>"When we did it,"I said,"I knew I really loved you. I felt..."  
>"Closer,"He finished.<br>I nodded.  
>"I met your ex a couple weeks ago,"He said.<br>"THAT asshole,"I said,"How'd it go?"  
>"He slammed me into a locker door,"He said,"Made my nose bleed."<br>"When,"I asked.  
>"The Tuesday before prom,"He said.<br>"Why didn't you tell me?!"  
>"I didn't want you to worry. I thought you wouldn't go to prom with me. It wasn't too bad, John helped me. Sent him running."<br>I hugged him tightly.  
>"You could've been hurt, badly."<p>

John's POV  
>I woke up before everyone else did. I decided to take a shower since no one was up yet. I got out of the bed, kissing Claire on the cheek before leaving the bedroom. I went in the bathroom, shut and locked the door. When I took off my shirt, I noticed the lashes and scars all over my torso. The cast on my arm had been removed. I ran my hands shakily through my hair, glad that those bastards were in jail. They couldn't hurt me anymore, couldn't hurt Sammy anymore. I didn't look as much like a skeleton as I used to from not really eating.<br>"John,"Claire's voice called softly.  
>I unlocked and opened the door. Claire was in the hallway.<br>"Hi Claire,"I said,"Come in."  
>She came in, locking the door behind me.<br>"Are you okay John,"She asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>"I know when you're upset John,"She said,"You better tell me."  
>"Look at me,"I said,"I'm pathetic."<br>She hugged me.  
>"You're 18 now John,"She said,"Happy birthday."<p>

Claire's POV  
>"You already said that,"He said.<br>"I know,"I said slyly,"But I forgot your present."  
>I kissed him.<br>"What are you doing in here anyways,"I asked.  
>"Taking a shower,"He said.<br>"Can I join?"  
>"If you wish."<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"I miss them,"Brian said.<br>"Your parents,"I asked.  
>He nodded.<br>"It's messed up, but I kind of miss mine too,"I said,"But don't tell John I said that."

Allison's POV  
>I woke up in someone else's bed. I sat up and looked around me. The sun was starting to rise, and I could just barely see someone lying in the bed next to me, sleeping. Andy. I shook him awake.<br>"Hey Allison,"He said.  
>"Did we.."<br>"Don't know,"He said,"Probably not."  
>"Then why am I here,"I asked.<br>"Maybe you were tired,"He said,"You probably just fell asleep."  
>"You're probably right,"I said,"I should go. Bye Andy."<br>"Bye Allison,"He said, and kissed me.  
>I climbed out Andy's bedroom window and walked back home.<p>

John's POV  
>We left for the apartment at noon. Sammy Claire and I said goodbye to everyone. Andy and his parents said they'd miss us. We assured them we'd visit sometimes.<br>"Bye Sammy,"Brian said,"John, Claire."  
>"You're coming with us,"I said.<br>"Huh,"He asked.  
>"To see the house,"I said,"Andy and his parents have already seen it, but you haven't."<br>Sammy, Claire, Brian, and I drove to the house, taking our things with us. Except Brian. He was going to stay at Andy's until he goes to college next year. Claire and I went to the master bedroom. There were two bedrooms.  
>"We're going be a family Claire,"I said,"We have a home...a baby."<br>She smiled, kissing me.  
>"We have love,"She suggested.<br>"That too,"I said as I kissed her.

Brian's POV  
>I was in the living room with Sammy, sitting on a spinning chair.<br>"Brian?"  
>"Yeah,"I asked.<br>"Do you want to have children,"She asked.  
>I stopped spinning in circles. I was staring at her now, wide-eyed.<br>"Are you saying..,"I asked quietly.  
>"No,"She darted,"I'm not. I was just asking."<br>"Are you sure?"  
>"I checked Brian,"She said,"Twice."<br>I nodded.  
>"Well..I guess,"I said,"Someday..not now though."<br>"I think you'd make a really good father,"She said.  
>John,Claire, and Sammy unpacked their things and settled into the living room.<br>"Is anyone hungry,"John asked.  
>"I can make spagetti,"I said.<br>"Go ahead,"John said,"Noodles are in the cupboard."  
>I went into the kitchen to make the spaghetti.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"Sammy,"John said.<br>"Yeah,"I asked.  
>"Have you and Brian.."<br>"No,"I said.  
>"Don't lie Sammy..."<br>"We haven't done anything! Why won't you believe me?"  
>"I do...it's..."<br>"Don't you trust me?"  
>"Yes I trust you, I just.."<br>"You just don't trust Brian! Maybe I should just move in with him!"  
>"Maybe you should!"<br>I ran to the front door, opening it.  
>"Maybe I'll get hit by a car,"I shouted,"You won't have to deal with me anymore!"<br>I ran out the door.

John's POV  
><em><strong>Why'd I say that?<strong> _I followed her out the door, Brian and Claire following me. Sammy was running down the street, dodging cars. We caught up with her just in time to see a car head straight for her. Bam! The car slammed on the brakes, her head smashing into the windshield. Claire screamed. Sammy lie on the floor, covered in blood and glass. I reached her first, leaning in close to her to see if she was alive. Brian leaned next to me, whispering to Sammy. The driver stood behind us, shaking.  
>"Where's Claire,"I asked.<br>"Calling 911,"The driver said,"Is..is she alive?"  
>"She's not breathing,"Brian said.<p>

_**I'm so sorry Sammy. It's all my fault.**_


	23. The Accident

Sammy's POV  
>I woke up in pain. There were bandages around my face and body.<br>"John,"my voice croaked.  
>I opened my eyes and saw that I was in a hospital. John stood by me, holding my hand.<br>"I'm right here Sammy,"He said,"I'm sorry."  
>"Where's Brian..and Claire,"I asked.<br>"Sitting across the room,"He said,"Want them to come over here?"  
>"No,"I said,"Not yet. I want to talk to you first."<br>"About what,"He asked.  
>"When our father..when he raped me..,"I said quietly.<br>"You don't have to talk about it Sammy,"He said.  
>"I know,"I said,"But I want to. I lied to you."<br>"When,"He asked.  
>"When I told you I started my period a few years ago,"I said,"It was after he'd done it. I felt horrible for lying to you."<br>He put his arm around my shoulders, trying to hug me.  
>"He threatened me John,"I said,"He told me..to keep my mouth shut, or he'd do it again..and it'd be worse."<br>"How did I not know,"He said,"You looked so scared, horrified."  
>"You couldn't have. I just wanted to say sorry for lying to you."<br>"I don't blame you Sammy."  
>"Did you fill out the paper,"I asked,"For me to skip a grade?"<br>"Yeah,"He said,"I'll drop it off on Monday."  
>"Good,"I said.<p>

Brian's POV  
>"Brian, come here,"Sammy said.<br>I walked over to her and John.  
>"Sammy,"I said,"Are you okay?"<br>"Yeah, I'm fine,"She said.  
>"I thought you were gone forever,"I said,"I was worried. Don't do it again, okay?"<br>She smiled.  
>"Okay,"She said.<br>"Hey Sammy,"I said.  
>"Yeah,"She asked.<br>"Still in the mood for spaghetti,"I asked.  
>"Yeah sure,"She said.<br>"Good,"I said,"Because I made some back at the house."  
>"Huh,"She asked.<br>"You were out for three hours,"John said.  
>"I only left after I knew you would be okay,"I said.<br>"Where is it,"She asked.  
>"Claire has it,"I said,"She's over there. We wanted to wait until you woke up. It's still warm."<br>Claire brought over the bowl of spaghetti, serving it with a pasta spoon on paper plates. We all got plastic forks to eat with. Claire, John and I threw the trash away when we were done. The bowl was plastic, so Claire put the lid on and set it beside her.  
>Claire and John went to sleep on the chairs later that night. I sat beside Sammy on the had a brace around her neck, it was sprained, somehow not broken. I was horrified when I saw Sammy lying on the ground, looking dead. John had sobbed all the way to the hospital, thinking Sammy wouldn't make it. He finally calmed down when the doctors said she was stable.<br>"Brian,"Sammy said quietly,"Will YOU protect me?"  
>"I thought John was your protector,"I replied.<br>"Yeah,but John won't always be around. But you will."  
>"Sammy, you don't need protected,"I said,"Don't you know how strong you are?"<br>"You think I'm strong?"  
>"Yes."<br>"Brian?"  
>"Yeah?"<br>"Kiss me."

Sammy's POV  
>"Are you kidding,"Brian whispered,"Your brother's in..."<br>I pulled him toward me and kissed him.  
>"God, you're so beautiful,"He whispered.<br>"Thank you Brian."  
>"You weren't supposed to hear that."<br>I grabbed his hand.  
>"I guess I'm pretty lucky,"He said.<br>"Whattdya mean,"I asked.  
>"For most people,"He started,"They don't find the right person untill they date a few different people. But with you..."<br>"You think I'm the ONE,"I asked.  
>"I can feel it..,"He said.<br>I looked at him suspiciously. _**Is he using me?** _  
>"Why Brian,"I asked.<br>"I love you,"He said.  
>"Was that BEFORE or AFTER we slept together,"I asked.<br>"Before,"He said,"Way before. Since I first met you."

Brian's POV  
>"Get away from me Brian,"She said.<br>"What,"I asked.  
>"GET AWAY,"She repeated.<br>I nodded.  
>"Okay,"I said.<br>I got up and went to toward the chairs where John and Claire were sleeping. I stopped when I heard Sammy crying. I walked back to her.  
>"Do you REALLY want me to leave,"I asked.<br>"No,"She said.  
>I sat by her on the bed. She hugged me.<br>"Do you know how strong you are Sammy,"I asked,"You don't need me. But I need you."  
>"I do need you,"She said,"I love you."<br>"I never thought I'd meet anyone,"I said,"I thought I'd just be alone forever. Then I met you. I was scared to ask you on a date."  
>"I'm glad you did,"She said,"I never would've had the courage."<br>"You kissed me on the cheek,"I said,"You didn't even know me then. That's courage."  
>"Do you believe in love at first sight,"She asked.<br>"I suppose,"I said.  
>"Could you feel it Brian,"She asked,"When we first met..like an attraction?"<br>"Yeah...,"I said,"Yeah, I guess I did."


	24. Graduation

_Last Day of School...May 25th_  
><span>Sammy's POV<span>  
>I skipped first hour, to sneak into the closet with Brian.<br>"Lock the door,"I said,"So no one walks in."  
>He locked the door.<br>"Are you sure about this,"He asked.  
>I touched his cheek.<br>"Yeah,"I said,"We have time."  
>He pulled my shirt up slowly.<br>"Wait,"I said.  
>He stopped.<br>"We should keep our clothes on,"I said.  
>"Yeah,"He agreed.<br>"Are you wearing a...?  
>"Yeah."<br>He held me closely.  
>"Please be gentle Brian,"I whispered.<br>He nodded. He was gentle. He kept stopping, wondering if I was okay.  
>"Am I hurting you,"He asked.<br>I gasped, my nails digging into his back.  
>"I guess that's a no,"He said.<br>"Ow!"  
>"What happened?"<br>"You pushed too hard."

"It's okay."  
>We lied next to each other. Brian held me in his arms.<br>"Do we have to leave,"I whined.  
>"Afraid so,"He said,"Someone might get suspicious."<br>"I just want to stay here,"I said,"Wrapped up in your arms."  
>"I don't want to leave either,"He said.<br>He hugged me tightly. I stood up, then helped him up. I kissed him.  
>"See you Brian,"I said.<br>We snuck out into the hallway.  
>"We've got ten minutes of first hour left,"Brian said.<br>"See you at lunch Bri,"I said.  
>I snuck back to my first hour class, art. The teacher wasn't in there, and since we have a big class, no one noticed me walk in. I quickly set up my painting canvas and pretended to paint.<br>"Wher've you been,"Allison, who I was standing by, asked.  
>"Nowhere,"I said.<br>"With Brian,"She asked.  
>"Yeah,"I admitted.<br>"So...did you guys..,"She whispered.  
>"No,"I said.<br>"Mmm-hmm,"She said in disbelief.  
>"What makes you say that,"I asked.<br>"You've got that 'I just had sex' look on your face,"She whispered.  
>I laughed.<br>"Okay, I admit it,"I said,"But don't tell anyone, especially John."  
>"Got it,"She said,"So, how many times have you done it?"<br>"Twice,"I said.  
>"How was it?"<br>"You're very nosy,"I joked,"But..it was pretty good."  
>She laughed.<br>"Have you and Andy done it yet,"I whispered.  
>"Not sure,"She said,"I woke up in his bed the day after John's birthday."<p>

John's POV  
>I was in the parking lot behind the school, leaning against the brick wall. I was smoking a cigarette. I'd stopped doing drugs since after I started dating Claire.<br>"Hey John,"Someone whispered.  
>I looked over. Claire was standing by the door, she walked near me. I tossed my cigarette on the ground and stomped it out.<br>"Hey babe,"I said.  
>She kissed me on the cheek.<br>"How's the baby,"I asked.  
>She smiled.<br>"Alive and well,"She said,"How are YOU John?"  
>"Perfect,"I said.<br>"Are you sure John,"She asked,"You seem upset."  
>"It's just...I can't believe we're graduating,"I said,"We won't have to come here anymore. And..you're having a baby. We're gonna be a family."<br>"Are you scared John,"She asked.  
>"A little,"I said.<br>"So am I,"She said.  
>"I don't want to be like my father,"I said.<br>"Don't worry John,"She said, and hugged me,"You won't."  
>"Does anyone know that you're pregnant,"I asked.<br>"No,"She said,"Just the rest of the club, and Sammy, and Andy's parents."  
>"That's good,"I said,"No one will know you got knocked up by a criminal."<br>"You're not a criminal anymore John,"She said,"You've changed."

Brian's POV  
>I daydreamed about Sammy all day untill lunch, when I got to see her again. I practically ran to lunch when the bell rang. I went in the lunchroom and sat across from Allison and Andy. They were smirking at me.<br>"What,"I asked.  
>"So..you and Sammy were in the closet earlier,"Andy said quietly.<br>"Who told you,"I demanded,"Look, I can't have this getting out. It'll ruin Sammy's rep."  
>"It's okay, Allison told me,"Andy said,"I won't tell."<br>"Especially not John,"I said,"He'll kill me."  
>Someone sat next to me.<br>"Hey Larry,"Andy said,"Finally accepted my invitation, huh?"  
>"Well,I figured it's the last day of school,"Larry said,"So...why not?"<br>I wasn't very great friends with Larry. I just knew him from physics club.  
>"Hey Brian,"Sammy's voice.<br>I turned around. She sat next to me, holding my hand.  
>"Larry, this is Sammy,"I said,"My girlfriend."<p>

Sammy's POV  
>I still smiled when Brian called me his girlfriend. I went over to greet Larry. He was skinny, smaller than Brian, not bad looking. He had brown hair, kind of pale skin, and green eyes.<br>"I know you,"Larry said,"From trigonometry."  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>Larry scooted over and let me sit between Brian and him.  
>"Remember when someone wrote the joke on the board,"I asked.<br>"That was me,"Larry said.  
>"Really,"I exclaimed,"No way!"<br>"Yeah,"He said.  
>"Andy,"Larry asked.<br>"Yeah,"Andy asked.  
>"Why did you apologize to me,"Larry asked.<br>"I felt horrible,"Andy said,"I wanted to apologize earlier, but I didn't know how. And I couldn't find you."  
>"I stayed home,"Larry said,"The entire week. I faked sick."<br>"How old are you,"I asked Larry.  
>"Sixteen,"Larry said,"And a half."<br>I nodded.  
>"I should be going,"Larry said,"I have..things to do."<br>We said goodbye to Larry. He walked away, then turned around after a second.  
>"By the way Andy,"He said,"You're still an asshole."<br>Larry laughed and walked out.  
>"He's right you know,"Brian said.<br>Andy kicked Brian under the table. I kicked Andy.  
>"Why are nerds so cute,"I wondered aloud.<br>Brian stared at me.  
>"Oh, but not as cute as you,"I said.<br>Brian laughed. I put my head on my hand.  
>"You okay,"Brian asked.<br>"I'm tired,"I said,"Did anyone bring lunch?"  
>"Yeah,"Andy said, and opened his giant lunch bag.<br>He handed Brian and I a sandwich. I gave half to Brian. Andy split a sandwich with Allison.  
>"What kind is it,"Allison asked.<br>"It's a surprise,"Andy said.  
>I took a bite of it. It was sweet, and crunchy.<br>"Not bad,"I said.  
>"It's Cap'n Crunch and pixi stix,"Andy said.<br>"My favorite,"Allison said.  
>I was called to the office after lunch. They asked me my schedule for next year. I arranged the classes, then went back to class. I wasn't paying attention all day. I daydreamed about Brian. I didn't think I could possibly love him any more. I worried about him leaving for college. <em><strong>Would he forget about me? Would he cheat on me?<strong>_

Allison's POV  
>I walked home after school. I noticed that my parents weren't home. I also noticed on their calendar that they were taking a one week vacation to St. Louis, and they left me here. Not that I wasn't used to being alone, I just wished they'd warn me before they left. Being alone was especially crippling today. I got to the phone and called Andy.<br>"Hello,"Andy answered.  
>"Andy?"<br>"Yeah?"  
>"Can you come over? My parents left for vacation and I'm alone. I need someone."<br>"Yeah, sure, I'll be right over."  
>Andy got here minutes later in his car. I hugged him when he came to the door. I started to cry.<br>"What's wrong,"He asked.  
>"I don't know,"I said,"They leave all the time but.."<br>He grabbed me and held me in a hug. I sat by him on the couch.  
>"Andy,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"He asked.  
>"Remember what I said about sex?"<br>"You said, 'if you love someone it's okay',"He said.  
>"I love YOU Andy,"I said, and kissed him firmly on the lips.<p>

Sammy's POV  
>"Okay John,"I said,"Rock, paper, scissors."<br>"For what,"John asked.  
>"Loser has to do dinner dishes,"I said.<br>"Deal,"He said.  
>One, two, three.<br>"Rock beats scissors,"I said.  
>"Beginner's luck,"He said,"Try again."<br>One, two, three.  
>"Paper beats rock,"John said.<br>"One more,"I said,"Tie breaker."  
>One, two, three.<br>"Rock beats scissors again,"I taunted jokingly,"You lose."  
>Claire walks in the room.<br>"Claire you want to play some rock paper scissors,"John asked.  
>"What's the stakes,"Claire asks, looking at me.<br>"Loser does dishes,"I said.  
>"All right, I'll play,"She said.<br>The phone rang. I went to answer it as John loses to another game of RPS.  
>"Ya-llo,"I said.<br>"Sammy? It's Brian."  
>"Hey Bri,"I said.<br>"What's up?"  
>"Oh, nothing. Just playing a game with John."<br>"What kind of game,"He asked curiously.  
>"Rock, paper,scissors."<br>"Who's winning?"  
>"I am."<br>"Oh,"He said.  
>"Something wrong Bri?"<br>"No, I was just bored. Andy's at Allison's house."  
>"Oh. Okay."<br>"See ya Sunday, Sammy."  
>"Yeah, bye."<br>I hung up.  
>"Who was that,"John asked.<br>"Brian,"I said,"He was bored, wanted to talk."  
>John nodded.<br>"Dishes tonight Johnny,"I joked.  
>He smirked.<br>"Smartass,"He joked.

_Sunday, Graduation Day...May 27th_  
>John and Claire were getting their caps and gowns on. Our school colors were blue and yellow, guys wore blue, girls wore yellow.<br>"What time is it,"John asked.  
>"John, we have time,"Claire said,"It's only three o clock."<br>"Yeah, a half hour,"John said,"Sometime this CENTURY, Sammy."  
>"Hold on,"I said, finishing my eye-shadow,"I have to get this on."<br>I finished the makeup and put it in the case. I slid the case back in the dresser drawer by my bed and went out into the hallway.  
>"Do I look okay,"I asked.<br>"Terrific,"John said,"Can we go now?"  
>Claire and John followed me to the car. John handed me the keys. We'd gotten the car after the house. It was a gift from Claire's grandparents, a red 1966 Mustang, a graduation gift for Claire and John. I'd just gotten my learner's permit last week.<br>"Remember Sammy,"John said,"We want to get there in ONE piece, okay?"  
>"Funny,"I said, starting the engine,"Absolutely hilarious."<br>Surprisingly, we got there without causing the apocalypse. Claire and John went to their graduation seats, waiting for their names to be called. Not surprisingly, Brian was valedictorian. He got to make a speech.  
>"Everyone,"Brian started,"My friends...On this day, we finally graduate. We've done it...we've made it."<br>I began to space out as Brian continued to speak.  
>"And thank you, breakfast club, John, Claire, Andy, Allison, for being there, for sticking with me..good luck, to all of you."<br>_**He's so cute when he's nervous**_. Everyone applauded. Brian sat down. The salutatorian made a speech. I was busy spacing out. That person sat down, then the names were called off. It took forever since it was a class of about three hundred.  
>"John Bender..."<br>I stood up and cheered. _**My brother finally graduated**_. Not that I thought he wouldn't, he's very smart. Andy's parents were videotaping the graduation. John went up and grabbed his diploma, flipped his tassel over, then sat down. More names were called off.  
>"Andrew Clark..."<br>I cheered for Andy. More names were called off.  
>"Brian Johnson..."<br>I stood up and cheered again. Brian blew me a kiss from stage.  
>"Allison Reynolds.."<br>I waved at Allison. She waved back.  
>"Claire Standish..."<br>Claire blew a kiss to John from the stage. I stopped listening when I put my head on my hand and started to doze off.  
>"Hey,"Someone nudged me,"Wake up, time to go."<br>"Huh,"I asked, opening my eyes.  
>John stood above me, surrounded by the rest of the group.<br>"Johnny,"I exclaimed.  
>I hugged him so tightly that I lifted him above the ground for a second.<br>"Thanks sis,"John said.  
>"Well, I have to go,"Andy said,"See you guys."<br>Allison hugged Andy.  
>"Bye,"She said.<br>Andy left. I went over to Brian, who put his arm around me.  
>"Are you having a party Brian,"I asked.<br>"I don't know,"Brian said.  
>"What about you Allison,"I asked.<br>"Next Wednesday,"She said,"My parents are on vacation."  
>"John, Claire,"I asked,"What about you two?"<br>"Not sure yet,"Claire said.  
>"Brian,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"He asked.  
>"I liked your speech,"I said.<br>"Thanks,"He said.


	25. Allison's Party

_**CAUTION: THE FOLLOWING CHAPTER IS SAD. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED**_

* * *

><p><em>Wednesday May 30th...<em>  
><span>Brian's POV<span>  
>"Brian, wake up,"Andy shouted.<br>"I'm awake,"I said.  
>"Oh really,"He asked,"Then why are you still in bed?!"<br>He pulled the blanket off me.  
>"Okay, I'm up, I'm up,"I shouted,"Jeez!"<br>"You're not dressed,"Andy asked.  
>I was still in my pj's, so was Andy.<br>"Neither are you,"I said.  
>"We're late for Allison's party,"He said,"It's already ten thirty."<br>"You know she wouldn't start without you,"I said.  
>I got dressed and went downstairs to the kitchen.<br>"Do you want some breakfast before you go Brian,"Kim, who was cooking something, asked.  
>"Sure,"I said,"What are you making?"<br>"Scrambled eggs,"She said.  
>She put some on a plate and gave it to me. I got maple syrup and poured it on the eggs, a trick Andy taught me, which he got from Allison. I quickly gobbled the eggs, put the plate in the sink, then ran out to Andy's car.<br>"Ready to go,"Andy asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>"Eggs and syrup for breakfast?"  
>"Yeah. How'd you know?"<br>"It's all over your face,"He said,handing me a napkin.  
>"Oh,"I said, wiping off my face.<br>We got to Allison's house. Allison came outside and greeted us, kissing Andy.  
>"Is Sammy here,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"Allison said,"She's in the kitchen, eating cupcakes."  
>I followed Andy and Allison into the house. I went into the kitchen, where Sammy sat, eating a cupcake.<br>"Brian,"She said.  
>"Hey, Sammy,"I said.<br>I sat by her.  
>"Eating all the cupcakes,"I asked.<br>"Yep,"She said, handing me one.

John's POV  
>Claire and I were in Allison's room, talking.<br>"We're getting married, right,"Claire asked.  
>"Of course,"I said.<br>"When John?"  
>"I don't know,"I said,"July? August?"<br>"How about June,"She asked.  
>"Next month?"<br>She grabbed my hand.  
>"Okay, August,"She said.<br>"When in August,"I asked.  
>"The third."<br>"Why the third?"  
>"My eighteenth birthday."<br>"A birthday AND a wedding...nice."

Claire's POV  
>"I love you John,"I said.<br>"You said that twenty times,"He joked,"Today."  
>"I know,"I said.<br>"Love you too Claire,"He said,"And the baby."  
>I put my hand on my stomuch. I felt the baby move.<br>"John,"I said,"It moved."  
>He looked at me with interest. I brought his hand gently to my stomuch.<br>"Can you feel it,"I asked.  
>John smiled, his eyes brightened.<br>"Yeah,"He said.  
>"Do you think it'll be a boy,"I asked,"Or a girl?"<br>"A boy, I hope,"He said.  
>"What'll we name it?"<br>"John Junior,"He joked.  
>"That's a good idea,"I said,"What if it's a girl?"<br>"Claire Junior."  
>Allison ran into the room.<br>"Time for presents,"She said,"And cake."  
>John and I followed her into the living room. Andy handed out cake to everyone, John, Brian, Sammy, Andy, me, and of course Allison, were the only ones there. <em><strong>She did say she had no friends.<strong>_

Allison's POV  
>I finished eating my piece of cake, the corner piece. Andy made the cake, vanilla with yellow and blue icing, and black icing on top that said 'congrats!' Andy put his arm around me.<br>"Thanks Andy,"I said.  
>I looked over at the presents, seeing a stack of them.<br>"Andy, where'd these all come from,"I asked.  
>"Us,"He said,"My parents."<br>I handed Andy my plate and he went to throw it away. When he came back, he handed me a present.  
>"From me,"He said.<br>I opened it. A new set of paintbrushes. Twenty five brushes of different sizes and shape. I hugged Andy tightly. He gave me another present. It was from Brian, I opened it. It was a set of oil paints.  
>"Thanks Brian,"I said.<br>Brian nodded. Andy gave me another present. From Claire. It was a golden colored heart shaped locket necklace.  
>"It's empty now,"Claire said,"You can put a picture in it."<br>I looked at Andy, smiling. I handed it to him and he put it around my neck. He gave me another present. From John. It was a switchblade knife, black handled with a red dragon in the handle, the blade was shiny silver.  
>"Cool,"I said.<br>"I knew you wanted one,"John said,"Since you stole mine.."  
>I smiled and blushed. I folded the blade and put it in my pocket. Andy gave me another present, from Sammy. A sketchpad, colored art pencils, and an envelope full of a bunch of pictures including all of us.<br>"Thought you could use some inspiration for your drawings,"Sammy said.  
>"Thanks Sammy,"I said.<br>Andy gave me one last present.  
>"From my parents,"He said.<br>I opened it. Inside was a thirteen inch television.  
>"For when you go to college,"Andy said.<br>I hugged Andy.  
>"Tell them I love it,"I exclaimed.<p>

Brian's POV  
>We watched a couple movies then Andy and I went home. When I got to Andy's house, I was suprised to see my dad there, red eyed, like he'd been crying. Andy went up to his room. I sat across from my dad.<br>"What do you want,"I asked rather snobbishly.  
>"Brian, I don't quite know how to tell you this,"My dad started,"But..your mother, and..and Maggie..they were in a car wreck earlier this morning. The car flipped, and it caught on fire."<br>Maggie was my little sister's name.  
>"Are they..."<br>"They're...gone Brian,"He said.  
>I stared blankly at him for a second before it hit me. <em><strong>No, no way. This can't be for real.<strong>_  
>"No,"I shouted,"You're lying!"<p>

_**It can't be the truth! They can't be...dead..**_  
>"I wish I was,"He said.<br>"No,"I whimpered.  
>I started shaking.<br>"I'm sorry Brian,"He said.  
>I buried my head in my hands, sobbing uncontrollably. My dad came over and sat by me. I hugged him.<br>"It's okay Brian,"He said,"It'll be okay."  
>I nodded. His voice was breaking.<br>"I'm sorry for being so tough on you,"He said,"And putting so much pressure on you."  
>"It's okay,"I said.<br>"Your mother loved you,"He said,"She missed you. She never meant to hurt you, neither of us did. I'm so sorry Brian."  
>"You haven't hugged me in years,"I said.<br>He reached over to hug me again, I flinched.  
>"You're scared of me Brian,"He said, almost like a question.<br>"You shoved me into a wall,"I shouted,"You hit me, you and Mom. I wasn't good enough for you? Why do you hate me?!"  
>"I don't hate you,"He said,"I love you Brian."<br>I hugged him tightly.  
>"I love you too Dad,"I said.<br>"We'll get through this Brian,"He said,"I swear to god, we'll get through this together."


	26. John and Claire's Party

"Maybe you should stay here tonight Dad,"I said,"So you're not all alone at the house."  
>"Are you sure you want me here,"He asked.<br>"You're all I have left,"I mumbled, then shouted,"Hey Kim?"  
>Kim came into the living room.<br>"Can my dad stay over tonight,"I asked.  
>"Of course,"Kim said,then looked at my dad,"Do you want to stay in the guest room?"<br>"That sounds great,"my father said.  
>Kim and I led him to the guest room, the one that John stayed in.<br>"The bedsheets and blankets are in the closet,"Kim said, then left.  
>"You got valedictorian, Brian,"My dad asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said.  
>"Your speech was really good Brian,"He said.<br>"How'd you...?"  
>"We were there,"He said,"Your mother, Maggie and I. We should've stayed, and talked to you."<br>"Really,"I asked.  
>"Yes,"He said,"We wanted to see you graduate. I'm proud of you. So was your mother, and Maggie."<br>"I guess all the shit you gave me really helped,"I said sarcasticly.  
>I was still angry at him.<br>"I should've talked to you more, Brian,"He said,"When you got caught with the flare gun."  
>"Yeah,"I interrupted,"But instead you threw me into a wall. You didn't even ask me about it."<br>"I'm sorry,"He said.  
>"You think that makes up for everything?!"<br>I ran into my room, slamming the door behind me.

Andy's POV  
>I was walking past Brian's father's guest room when I saw Brian run out and into his room. Brian's father stood up.<br>"Are you Andrew,"He asked.  
>"Yeah,"I said.<br>"Nice to meet you,"He said,"My name's Ron."  
>I nodded.<br>"Want me to go get Brian,"I asked.  
>"No,"He said,"He needs time to himself. He's..he's angry at me."<br>"I'll go talk to him,"I said.  
>"All right,"He said,"I'll see you Andy."<br>I went into Brian's room. He was sitting on the bed, looking up at me as I walked in.  
>"You okay Brian,"I asked.<br>"I guess,"Brian said.  
>I sat by him, putting my arm around his shoulder.<br>"I'm here for you Brian,"I said comfortingly,"If you want to talk."  
>"Thanks Andy,"He said,"But..can I be alone right now?"<br>"Sure,"I said, and got up.  
>"Andy,"He asked.<br>"Yeah?"  
>"Don't tell Sammy yet, okay,"He said,"Or anyone else. I'll tell them on my own, when I'm ready."<br>"Okay Bri,"I said, then left the room.

Sammy's POV  
><em>Saturday, June 2nd...<em>

Claire and John decided to combine their graduation parties. They also decided that I should cook everything, since I'm just SO good at cooking. At least I got to choose the menu. I chose homeade pepperoni pizza, macaroni and cheese, vanilla cupcakes and chocolate cake. John was in charge of buying all the drinks, non alcoholic.  
>I'd just finished the large pot of mac'n cheese when John walked in with the sodas.<br>"How's the pizzas,"He asked.  
>"Terrific,"I said,"They're on the table out back."<br>There was a large plastic foldup table out in the backyard for everyone to sit on. John helped me carry the macaroni to the table. Claire set up the plates, napkins, and utinsels. I got bacon bits from the fridge to put in the mac'n cheese. I took the cake, double layered and sitting in a pan, out of the fridge and set it in the middle of the table. I took the cupcakes out too. Claire took a spoonful of my macaroni and tasted it.  
>"It's delicious, Sammy,"Claire said.<br>It was about twelve pm. The party started at twelve thirty. Brian, Allison, Andy, Andy's parents, and Claire's grandparents were coming. Andy, Brian, and Andy's parents, and for some reason, Brian's father got to our house about twelve thirty. Then came Allison,Claire's grandparents, and a few of John's friends, then friends of Claire's. Brian immediatly went inside as soon as he got there. He sat on the spinning chair, the same one he sat on the first day he visited. He wasn't spinning though. He looked sad, worn out. There was pain in his eyes, a deep pain, like he'd lost something. He had dark circles under his eyes, like he hadn't slept for a while.  
>"Hey Sammy,"Brian mumbled.<br>"Something wrong Brian,"I asked.  
>"No,"He said, I knew he was lying,"Nothing's wrong. Just a little tired, that's all."<br>I went over and kissed him on the cheek.  
>"I'll be right out,"Brian said,"I need to use the bathroom."<br>I nodded and walked out into the backyard.

Brian's POV  
>I waited untill Sammy left, then I ran to the bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind me. I was shaking. I hadn't slept since Wednsday, I couldn't. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw THEM. My mother, and Maggie. Poor Maggie, she was only eight. <em><strong>It should've been me<strong>_. I stared in the mirror, glaring at the reflection, tears streaming down my face.

Sammy's POV  
>I was getting worried about Brian. He'd been in the bathroom for ten minutes now. I decided to go check on him. I went to the bathroom and knocked on the door.<br>"Brian,"I asked.  
>"Sammy,"Brian asked,"What do you want?"<br>"Are you okay,"I asked.  
>"I'm fine,"He said,"Please go away."<br>"What are you doing,"I demanded.  
>"Standing here,"He said.<br>"Open the door Brian,"I demanded.  
>The lock clicked and the door opened. Brian stood there, staring at his reflection in the mirror, sobbing.<br>"I don't like what I see Sammy,"He said.  
>He looked closer at the mirror, almost touching it.<br>"I hate it,"He said,"I hate it!"  
>He slammed his fists on the counter, I jumped. He turned toward me, his eyes boaring into mine.<br>They're gone...,"He said shakily,"They're...both...gone."  
>I grabbed him into a tight hug, rubbing his back to get him to stop crying.<br>"Who's gone,"I asked.  
>"My mother..and my sister..,"He said,"Car..wreck.."<p>

I nodded. I helped him to my room and sat him on the bed.  
>"When was it,"I asked.<br>"Last Wednesday morning,"He said between sobs,"My sister, she was eight, it should've been me."  
>"Brian, NO don't say that,"I said, hugging him tightly.<br>Brian wiped his tears and slowly told me about what happened when he got home from Allison's party. He told me about his father's apology.  
>"Do you forgive him?"<br>"I suppose,"He said,"I think he really meant it though."  
>He put his head in his hands and groaned.<br>"Are you okay,"I asked.  
>"Just a headache,"He said, and looked up.<br>"When's the last time you slept,"I asked.  
>"Maybe Tuesday night,"He said,"I can't sleep. Whenever I close my eyes, I see them."<br>I scooted closer to him, putting my arm around his shoulder, petting his head comfortingly. He put his head on my shoulder, closing his eyes.  
>"I love you,"I said,"Remember that."<br>"Hmm...,"He mumbled sleepily, which I took to mean, 'I love you too'.  
>I listened as his light whimpers turned into quavering breaths, then finally to light snoring. He'd fallen asleep. I gently removed his head from my shoulders and put my pillow below his head. I got a blanket and draped it lightly over him.<br>"I'll be right back,"I whispered, knowing he probably couldn't hear me.

I left the room and went to the backyard.  
>"Where's Brian,"Andy asked,"Is he okay?"<br>"Yeah, he's fine,"I said,"He's sleeping in my room. He's tired, had a long week."  
>"Yeah,"Andy said.<br>Claire was handing out pizza and mac'n cheese to everyone as John opened their presents.  
>"What'd you get them,"I asked.<br>"You'll see,"Andy said.  
>"From Andy,"John said, opening another gift,"Car Seat covers."<br>I smiled, taking two plates with pizza and maccaroni, one for me, one for Brian when he wakes up. I went inside and sat the plates on kitchen table, and went to check on Brian. After shaking him, I realized that he would probably be out for a while, so I put foil around the two plates and put them in the fridge for later.  
>After the presents was the cake and cupcakes. I again took two pieces and retired into the house to see Brian. John stopped me.<br>"Hey Sammy,"John said,"Where are you going? And where's Bri?"  
>"Brian's sleeping in my room,"I said,"He's really tired. He hasn't slept since Tuesday night."<br>"Why not,"John asked.  
>I told him what Brian told me about the car wreck, and how Brian was acting. John stared with horror and sympathy as I told him.<br>"Poor Brian,"He said,"He doesn't deserve this."  
>"I know,"I said,"I'm going to check on him now."<br>"Okay,"John said, taking his cake and heading back outside.

I went to Brian, who was starting to stir. He blinked his eyes open, adjusting to the light.  
>"Sammy,"He asked.<br>I went closer to him and sat by him on the bed.  
>"I'm right here,"I said,"I saved some food for you Brian."<br>He sat up.  
>"Good,"He said.<br>"I told John about what happened,"I said.  
>"You TOLD him,"He asked.<br>"Sorry, I just thought..,"I defended.  
>"It's okay,"He interrupted,"I was going to tell people when I was ready."<br>"You said you couldn't sleep,"I said,"But you did."  
>"You helped me,"He said.<br>"How so,"I asked.  
>"When I closed my eyes,"He said,"I saw you. You're like.. some sort of ..painkiller. Remember in the hospital, when I said I needed you?"<br>"Yeah?"  
>"I really do need you,"He said.<p> 


	27. The Funeral

_Friday, June 8th..._

Brian's POV  
>I couldn't sleep. It was two in the morning. I made my way to the phone downstairs and dialed Sammy's number. Luckily, Sammy answered, and I didn't wake up John or Claire.<br>"Hello,"I said.  
>"Brian,"Sammy asked,"What do you want?"<br>"Today's the funeral, Sammy,"I said shakily,"For both of them. I..I can't sleep."  
>"Want to go down to the lake,"She asked,"And talk."<br>"Okay, sure,"I said,"But on one condition."  
>"What's that,"She asked.<br>"Don't throw me in the lake again,"I joked.  
>"Okay,"She said.<br>"I'll meet you outside your house in ten minutes,"I said.  
>"Okay, bye,"She said, and hung up.<p>

I walked to Sammy's house, waiting outside as she snuck out her front door and ran over to me. We walked together on the sidewalk down to the lake where we first snuck out. We sat on the dock, the moon wasn't full, but it still shimmered the black liquid of the water. Sammy was carrying a small battery-operated lantern, which she sat in between us.  
>"So..the funeral's today huh,"She asked.<br>I nodded regretfully.  
>"I know what it's like to lose parents Brian,"She said.<br>"But, you can see them in jail,"I added without thinking.  
>"Not anymore,"She said,"Not like they used to be."<br>"What do you mean 'used to be',"I asked.  
>"They wanted a girl,"She said,"That's why they hated John. Then they got one. They treated me like a princess. Then one day... it was like...I didn't exist anymore. I wasn't what they expected, I wasn't good enough for them."<br>Tears welled in her eyes.  
>"Sammy,"I said,"Don't cry."<br>She nodded, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes for a second.

Sammy's POV  
>Brian lied down on his back in front of the lamp. I lied down next to him. He put his arm under my neck.<br>"I had a weird dream the other day,"I said.  
>"About?"<br>"You,"I said,"I dreamed you went to college, and you cheated on me. You said you didn't like me anymore."  
>"Sammy..."<br>"I know,"I said,"You won't cheat on me."  
>He pulled me closer to him.<br>"I want to stay here,"I said,"Forever."  
>"Me too,"Brian said.<br>I closed my eyes and began to fall asleep.

Brian's POV  
>"Sammy, wake up,"I shook her gently,"You can't fall asleep."<br>She wouldn't budge. I shrugged and lied my head down. We could stay here, like this, forever. I started falling asleep.  
>"Brian,"Someone nudged me,"Hey, wake up."<br>I opened my eyes, Sammy sat by me, shaking me awake.  
>"We fell asleep,"She said.<br>"What time is it,"I groaned.  
>"I don't know,"She said,"The sun's starting to rise. So, five, maybe six a.m."<br>I stood up and helped her up. I walked her back to her house, where we kissed quickly before she darted into the house.

I then went to Andy's house, where my father and Andy were waiting up for me.  
>"Where've you been,"My father asked.<br>"I needed to talk to someone,"I said.  
>"So you leave the house early in the morning,"his voice elevated.<br>Andy went back up to his room.  
>"I wanted to see Sammy, okay,"I said.<br>"Brian,"He said.  
>He stepped near me, I backed away. I tried to run up to my room, but he grabbed my arm and stopped me. I flinched and blocked my face with my arm.<br>"I'm not going to hurt you,"He said,"Ever again."  
>He let go of my arm. I put my arm down and turned to face him.<br>"Okay,"I said,"Okay, I believe you."  
>"Now go get some sleep,"He said,"Before the funeral."<br>I nodded.  
>"Okay,"I said.<br>I went up to my room and went to sleep.

Andy woke me up a few hours later. I stubbornly got up and got dressed.  
>"Do you want me to go with you Brian,"Andy asked.<br>"No,"I said,"It's fine. I'll see you later."  
>I followed my dad into his car.<br>"Can we go pick up Sammy,"I asked.  
>"Your girlfriend?"<br>"Yeah, I called her earlier,"I said.  
>"Yeah, okay,"He said,"You really like her, huh?"<br>"I love her, dad,"I said.  
>"You do?"<br>"Yeah, I really do,"I said.  
>"She's a great girl, Bri,"He said.<p>

Sammy was waiting outside when we got to her house. She hugged John and waved goodbye to him and Claire and got in the back seat. We drove to the funeral. My father had them creamated, since their bodies were so messed up in the wreck. Sammy held my hand as we walked into the room. The close family, my father and I, sat up front. So did Sammy. There was music playing, more people came in and began to talk to me and my father and others. There were friends of my mother's and friends of my sister (who were children), and their parents. When no one was looking, I snuck into the bathroom untill the service started. I didn't want to talk anymore. I came back in when it started and sat back between my dad and Sammy. Sammy held my hand. My uncle Tom, my mother's brother, talked about my mother.  
>"She was a loving sister,"Tom said,"A wife, a mother to two children, who she loved dearly..."<br>There were more speakers. People talked about Maggie.  
>"A loving, optomistic, young child...so tragic, that she left so early...a very sweet little girl..."<br>I agreed with that. _**I mean, sure, we fought all the time, but I still loved her**_. My dad put his arm around me and I leaned against him, Sammy squeezed my hand tighter. After the funeral, I pulled Sammy aside to talk to her while my father was busy talking to other people. I hugged her tightly.  
>"I can't believe they're gone,"I said.<br>She grabbed my hands and held them. We followed everyone downstairs, where there was food.  
>"I...I can't do this,Sammy,"I said.<br>"What do you mean,"She asked.  
>"Goodbye, Sammy,"I said, kissing her forehead.<br>I went toward the door, then slipped out when no one was looking. I ran down the sidwalk, Sammy trying to run after me. I kept running until I found a little trail to the lake Sammy and I sat at. It looked so much different in the daytime. I walked around the lake to the other side. For a while, it was just a dirt trail, rocks, and trees. Then, there was an opening, a campfire place, with a fire pit in the middle and benches to sit on. I lied down on one of the benches, feeling the cool summer breeze and hearing the birds chirp.

Sammy's POV  
>I stopped chasing after Brian. I went back to his father to tell him he ran off.<br>"Do you know where he could've went,"Ron, Brian's father, asked.  
>"I'm not sure,"I said,"Maybe he went to Andy's house."<br>I followed him to the car and we drove to Andy's house to look for Brian. Andy came outside to greet us, surprised that we were back so early.  
>"Back already,"He asked.<br>"Is Brian here,"Ron asked.  
>"No,"Andy said,"Why? Is something wrong?"<br>"He ran off,"I said,"After the funeral. He kissed me on the head, said goodbye, and ran off."  
>"Maybe you should check your house,"Andy said to Ron.<br>"That's a good idea,"Ron said.  
>"I'll stay here,"Andy said,"In case he decides to show up here."<p>

We drove to Ron's house and checked the entire place. Brian was no where to be found.  
>"He couldn't have gotten far,"Ron said.<br>"I'll go check down at the lake,"I said,"We hang out there sometimes. You might want to stay here."  
>"I hope he's okay,"He said.<br>"Don't worry, I'm sure he's fine,"I said.

I went down to the lake. Brian wasn't there. I went around it and down the small trail, where I knew there was an opening. I found Brian lying on one of the benches, snoozing.  
>"Brian,"I said,"What are you doing here?"<br>Brian opened his eyes and sat up.  
>"Hey Sammy,"He said.<br>"Your father and I have been looking for you,"I said.  
>"Oh."<br>"You should come home."  
>"I don't want to.."<br>"Brian.."  
>"Sammy, you don't understand,"He said,"I can't be there anymore. I don't want to be around my father."<br>"Why not?"  
>"He reminds me of THEM too much."<br>"Do you WANT to forget about them?"  
>"No,"He was beggining to cry now,"I want them back! I just want them back!"<br>"Brian, you have to come home."  
>"No."<br>"Never?"  
>"No..not NEVER,"He said,"Just...not right now."<br>I pulled him in for a hug.  
>"There's a cabin a little bit that way,"I said, pointing behind him,"You can stay there. I'll meet you at night with food and to talk."<br>"What about my dad?"  
>"I'll tell him...you weren't here."<br>"Sammy...thanks."  
>I kissed him.<br>"Bye Brian."

I walked back to Ron's house.  
>"Did you find him,"Ron asked.<br>"No,"I lied,"He must've run away. I'm sorry."  
>"It's not your fault,"He said,"In fact, it's probably mine. You see, I've treated him pretty badly for the past few years."<br>"Yeah, I know,"I said gently,"He told me."  
>He nodded.<br>"You should go home, Sammy,"He said,"I'll stay at Andy's house."

He drove me back to my house. When I got inside, John was snoozing on the couch, and claire was making tacos for dinner. John opened his eyes when I came in.  
>"Hey Sammy,"John said.<br>"Hey John,"I said.  
>"Just get home,"He asked.<br>"Yeah,"I said.  
>Dinner was ready a few minutes later. We sat down at the kitchen table and ate it.<p>

After dinner, I went to my room and waited for John and Claire to go to bed. Then, I snuck into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water and made a turkey sandwhich to take to Brian. I grabbed the water and sandwhich and quickly but quitly, ran down to the cabin behind the lake. When I knocked, Brian opened the door and let me in. I gave him the sandwhich, which he quickly ate, and the water, which he drank some of.  
>"Hungry much,"I joked.<br>He snickered.  
>"It's great,"He said,"The sandwhich."<br>I sighed.  
>"I talked to your father,"I said,"I told him you probably ran away."<br>"What'd he say?"  
>"He said..he thought it was his fault you ran away, because he treated you so badly."<br>"So NOW he cares,"He said.  
>"Why'd you run away?"<br>"It's not fair,"He shouted,"He never cared before! And now, suddenly, he cares?! No! I hate him!"  
>"Are you ever coming back?"<br>"I don't know."  
>"If your father calls the cops, they'll send a search team after you. At least, come to my house."<br>"No,"He said,"I'm staying here."  
>"Fine,"I said.<br>I kissed him goodbye, then left.

_Two days later(Sunday, June 10)..._  
>Ron and Andy asked me to come over in the morning. They said there was a letter left in the mailbox, inside of a white envelope.<br>"I think you should read this,"He said, and handed it to me.  
>I looked at it. A paper with words written in pen:<p>

_ **We have your son. If you go to the police or tell anyone, we will kill him. If our demands are met, he will be returned to you, unharmed. Simply deliver two-thousand dollars to the cabin behind the lake on Oak Street. The money must be in a large manilla envelope. Remember, no police involvement. You have twenty- four hours, or Brian dies.**_


	28. The Kidnapping

"What do we do,"Andy asked.  
>"Should we call the police,"Ron asked.<br>"No,"I said,"I think they're serious."  
>"Yeah,"Andy said,"We'd better do what they say."<p>

Brian's POV  
>"You guys are gonna get in huge trouble,"John said,"You know that?"<br>I sat in the cabin with John, who was now in on the kidnapping scheme with me and Sammy.  
>"Not if you keep your mouth shut,"I joked,"Did you deliver the note?"<br>"Yeah,"He said.

Sammy's POV  
><strong>Flashback...<strong>  
><strong>I went to visit Brian last night to bring him food and beg him again to go back home. <strong>  
><strong>"I can't Sammy,"Brian said.<strong>  
><strong>"Your father thinks you've been kidnapped,"I said,"He thinks you're dead."<strong>  
><strong>"If I was kidnapped,"He said,"He wouldn't have to deal with me anymore."<strong>  
><strong>"Brian, don't talk like that,"I said.<strong>  
><strong>"I have an idea,"He said.<strong>  
><strong>"What,"I asked,"Are you going to fake being kidnapped?"<strong>  
><strong>He raised his eyebrows.<strong>  
><strong>"No,"I said,"We'll get caught!"<strong>  
><strong>"Not if we write a ransom note,"He said,"Telling my father not to go to the police."<strong>  
><strong>"What's this about a kidnapping,"A voice asked.<strong>  
><strong>I jumped and turned around. John stood there.<strong>  
><strong>"How'd you get here,"I asked.<strong>  
><strong>"I followed you,"John said,"What's Brian doing here? You know, his father's looking for him."<strong>  
><strong>Brian proceeded to tell John about why and when he ran away, then told him about his father and the kidnapping plan. John nodded.<strong>  
><strong>"So, you need a ransom note,"John said,"And neither of you can write one because your father will recognise the handwriting."<strong>  
><strong>"Yeah,"Brian said,"That's pretty much it."<strong>  
><strong>"All right, sure, I'll help,"John said,"But Sammy, you have to go home. And you're grounded, no tv for a week."<strong>  
><strong>"Can I read books,"I asked.<strong>  
><strong>"Yes, you can read books,"John answered,"Now go wait in the car."<strong>  
><strong>I walked to the car, which John stupidly left the keys in. John was in charge of writing the "ransom note". <strong>

Brian's POV  
><em>Present...<em>  
>"Do you think he'll come,"I asked.<br>"You act like your dad doesn't give a shit,"John said.  
>"He does,"I said,"But only because of my mother and sister."<br>"Look Bri, I'd give anything for my parents to give a rat's ass about me,"He said.  
>"I thought you didn't care about them,"I challenged.<br>"Well I do, all right,"John's voice rose a little,"They're my parents. I just wish that, just once, they would've at least ACTED like they hated me, I was shit to them."  
>"You're not shit John,"I said.<p>

John's POV  
>"I've been having this dream a lot lately, Bri,"I said,"It scares the shit out of me."<br>"Oh yeah,"He asked,"What is it?"  
>I told him about the shooting dream.<br>"It wasn't JUST you, John,"He said.  
>"Huh?"<br>"It wasn't like you were the ONLY one picking on me,"He said,"Everyone did. It's just...you were the only one who almost killed me."  
>"But, you wanted to kill ME,"I said.<br>"I didn't see any other way out,"He said,"Besides telling on you, of course. And you know what happened when I did that."  
>"Am I going to be like my father,"I asked.<br>"No,"He said,"At least, I don't think so."  
>"Really?"<br>"Yeah,"He said,"Seeing how you treat Sammy, and Claire."

Sammy's POV  
>"Do you HAVE two grand,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"Ron said,"In a savings account at the bank."  
>"Let's go then,"I said.<br>"Andy, you should stay here,"Ron said,"In case the kidnappers come back or anything."  
>Andy nodded. I went with Ron to the bank to get out two thousand dollars. They asked him why he wanted all that money.<br>"A car payment,"He lied,"It's a used car."  
>They bought it. We took the money and went back to Ron's house. He put the money in an envelope, as per the "kidnapper's" instructions.<br>"You know, Samantha,"He said,"Maybe you should go home. This could be dangerous."  
>"No,"I said,"I want to see Brian."<br>"All right,"He said,"But stay hidden."  
>I nodded. Ron closed the envelope and held it tightly.<br>"Why would anyone do this,"He asked, not talking to anyone specificly,"Brian never did anything to anyone!"  
>I put my arm on his shoulder.<br>"I don't know,"I said.  
>"What if they're lying,"He said,"Maybe they already killed him!"<br>He was shaking and starting to cry. The thought of losing his only son and last of his family was killing him. _**If only Brian could see this.**_  
>"He's not dead,"I said,"I just know it. He's okay, he has to be."<p>

Brian's POV  
>"Jeez John,"I exclaimed,"Did you have to tie this rope so tight?!"<br>"Had to make it realistic,"He said.  
>"It's cutting my hands off,"I joked.<br>John got out ductape and put it on my mouth. He put on his jacket and left for his car.  
>"See you Bri,"He said.<br>"Mmm-hmm,"I said through tape.

Moments later, Sammy burst through the door. She kneeled down next to me.  
>"I found him,"She shouted out the door.<br>"Is he alive,"My father asked as he ran through the door,"Brian! Thank god!"  
>He knelt down next to me. He took the tape off my mouth.<br>"Are you okay,"He panicked,"Did they hurt you?"  
>"No,"I said,"They just tied me up."<br>He and Sammy untied my hands. I looked at my father, only to realize that he was crying. _**He DOES care**_. He pulled me into a hug, squeezing me tightly, which he hadn't done since I was little. I started to cry to. _**To think, I thought he didn't care, that he hated me, but here he is, hugging me and crying. He never cries.**_  
>"I thought I lost you,"He said.<br>He and Sammy helped me into the car.

He drove Sammy home and drove me and him back to Andy's house.  
>"Hey Dad,"I asked.<br>"Yeah,"He asked.  
>"I don't want to go back to the old house anymore,"I said,"There's too many memories."<br>"Me either,"He said.  
>"Maybe we should just sell the house,"I said.<br>"Yeah,"He agreed,"Maybe we should."  
>"I..I still can't believe they're gone,"I said.<br>"I know,"He said,"Neither can I."  
>"I just feel like.. it should've been me,"I said.<br>He put his arm around my shoulder.  
>"I felt that way too at first,"He said,"But..you can't change what's already happened. You just have to move on. Or try to."<br>"I can't."  
>"Yes you can,"He said,"I'll help you. Sammy will help you. Your friends will help you."<br>"Remember when we used to play chess,"I asked.  
>"Yes,"He said,"I taught you."<br>"And how you thought I was so smart because I caught on so fast,"I said,"Then you got angry because I won so much?"  
>"Yes."<br>"Andy has a chess game,"I said,"Can we play?"  
>"Sure,"He said,"But we'll have to ask Andy."<br>And so begun the journey of reconnecting with my father. No... my Dad.


	29. Planning the Wedding

John's POV

_Monday, June 11_

I woke up and sat up slowly. I got up and went to the bathroom, where Claire was leaning over the toilet.

"Claire,"I asked,"Are you okay?"

She looked up at me and smiled.

"Yeah,"She said,"Just morning sickness."

I got a rag out of the bathroom closet, wet it, then handed it to her. I held back her hair as she threw up once again. She flushed the toilet and I helped her up. She put the tag on her head as she lied down on the bed in our room.

"I'm sorry,"I said.

"For what?"

"Doing THIS to you,"I laughed.

"It's okay John."

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"You don't want to see me puke."

I lied down next to her.

"You okay,"I asked again.

"Yeah. We should talk about the wedding."

"Like what?"

"Where to have it."

"Where do YOU want it?"

"The Grand Canyon,"She joked.

"Hmm..,"I started,"What about...Niagara Falls?"

"That's a great idea!"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. Just think about it. It'd be so beautiful."

"Okay..Niagara Falls, here we come...I guess."

"So..who should we invite?"

"Everyone,"I said,"Well, everyone we know."

She smiled and giggled.

"Brian will be best man,"I said.

"And Sammy can be a bridesmaid,"She said.

I kissed her head.

"I'm gonna go check on Sammy,"I said.

"Okay."

Sammy was lying on her bed, reading a book. She looked up at me.

"Hey John,"She said.

"Sammy,"I asked,"Have I told you about the wedding yet?"

"No."

"It's on August third, Claire's eighteenth birthday. At Niagara Falls."

"Cool."

"And Claire wants you to be a bridesmaid."

"I'd love to!"

"Good. I'm going to Claire's Grandparent's house to talk about the wedding. Take care of Claire for me, okay?"

"Okay,"She said.

I left and went to Claire's Grandparent's house. Her grandmother, Sally was out shopping, so I talked to her grandfather, Bennett, or Ben.

"We want to have the wedding at Niagara Falls,"I said,"If that's possible."

"Of course,"He said,"Do you know how many people you want to come yet?"

"It probably won't be very big. Just a few close friends and family."

"All right,"He said,"Tell me when you're sure."

Claire's grandparents have loads of money, more than her parents, and have agreed to help us with money for things.

"Are you planning a honeymoon,"He asked.

"Not yet. I want to surprise her."

"Any thoughts?"

I told him where I thought Claire would want to go most.

"I think that can be arranged,"He said.

"Really,"I asked.

"Of course. We can arrange plane tickets and reserve a hotel."

"Thank you!"


	30. Andy's Party & 4th of July

Saturday, June 23...

Sammy's POV

"Brian please,"I beg as he hits me, hard, in the face,"I'm sorry!" "Liar,"Brian mutters. He punches me in the stomach. I crouch over, holding my now bleeding mouth with one hand. He grabs me and throws me across the room. For being kind of small, he's very strong.

I woke up shaking and crying. I was terrified. The dream was so real. Why am I afraid of Brian? He won't hurt me? Will he? I closed my eyes, but didn't sleep for the rest of the night. John walked past my room in the morning, to find me awake, reading a book.

"What are you doing up,"John asked.

"I couldn't sleep,"I said.

"Why not?"

"I had a bad dream,"I said.

"About what,"He asked.

"Brian hit me,"I said,"He broke my jaw, I think."

"It's over now,"He said,"You're okay."

I nodded, but was shaking again.

"I'm scared, John,"I said.

He sat by me and put his arm around me.

"Don't be scared,"He said,"You'll be okay."

That day was Andy's graduation party. I went with John and Claire. A lot of people were there. Andy has a lot of friends. I went to Brian's room upstairs to see if he was in there. He wasn't in the room.

"Sammy,"Someone asked.

I turned around. Brian stood in the doorway.

"Hi Brian,"I said.

Brian's POV

Sammy was standing in my room, for some reason. I hadn't seen her in about three days.

"What are you doing,"I asked.

"I was looking for you,"She said.

"Are you mad at me,"I asked.

"No,"She said,"I've been having these dreams."

She told me about her nightmares.

"Is that why you've been ignoring me,"I asked.

She nodded.

"Sorry,"She said.

She walked toward me. I grabbed her hand.

"It's okay,"I said,"I'll never hurt you."

"I know,"She said,"Let's go downstairs. I hear there's a party."

I laughed. She led me down the stairs into the kitchen.

"You know,"I said,"I actually had a dream that you broke up with me."

We watched as Andy unwrapped his load of presents.

"I'm bored,"Sammy said.

"Wanna play a game,"I asked.

"Like what?"

"Card game?"

"Poker?"

"You know how to play that,"I asked.

"John taught me,"She said.

"That figures,"I joked.

"Got some cards,"She asked.

"Yeah in my room,"I said.

She followed me up to my room. I grabbed a deck of cards and gave them to her. She dealt the cards out, explaining the rules to me.

"Do you think Andy will notice we're gone,"She asked.

"Nah,"I said,"There's a bunch of people downstairs."

"Claire and John are getting married,"She said.

"Yeah, I know."

"In Niagara Falls."

"Sweet."

I looked closely at Sammy. Her eyes were bloodshot.

"You look tired,"I said.

She nodded.

"I haven't slept all night,"She said.

"The dream,"I asked.

She nodded again.

"It was too real,"She said.

I sat by her and hugged her.

"You're stronger than me,"I joked,"You know that, right?"

She laughed.

"I'll try to be less afraid,"She joked.

"Want some cake,"I asked.

Sammy's POV

"Sure,"I said, and followed him down the stairs again.

John was across the living room, by the front door, holding Claire's hand. He looked nervous, worn, scared even.

"Brian,"I said,"I'll be right back. I'm going to go talk to John."

"Okay,"Brian said.

I went over to John, who was talking to Claire. I tapped his shoulder, he jumped and turned toward me.

"Sammy,"John asked.

"Are you okay, John,"I asked,"You don't look so good."

"What are you talking about,"John asked,"I'm fine."

John was smiling, but there was pain and fear in his eyes. The kind of fear and pain he had when we lived with our parents. _**What's hurting you Johnny?**_I hugged him tightly around the waist. The pain in his face was gone, but the fear was still there. _**What are you thinking about? What's scaring you?**_

John's POV

Sammy was right, I didn't look well. That's because I wasn't. I'd been so jumpy and nervous the past few weeks. I was trying to hide it from everyone. Sammy'd told me about a bad dream she had. She's not the only one, I'd been having nightmares too. Everytime I tried to sleep, my father would be beating me again or something. I haven't even told Claire, not that she'd care. Of course she would, she loves me. I was starting to shake. I snuck away from Claire and Sammy and into the bathroom. I locked the door behind me. I heard all the things my parents said to me. _**All of it is true. NO! STOP! He won't stop hitting me. I'm gonna die! It hurts! STOP! STOP..**_There was a knock at the door. I realized that I was lying on the ground, covering my head. _**How'd I get down here?**_ I stood up.

"John,"Claire's voice,"Are you okay?"

"Yeah,"I said.

I unlocked and opened the door.

"Oh my god,"Claire said.

"What,"I asked.

Claire's POV

I went into the bathroom with him and closed the door. Tears streamed down his face. He was shaking.

"You're crying,"I said.

John looked in the mirror and quickly wiped his tears.

"What's wrong,"I demanded.

He told me what happened.

"Does it happen a lot,"I asked.

"For the past few weeks,"He said,"Yeah."

"Why didn't you tell me,"I asked.

"I didn't think you'd care."

"Of course I would,"I said,"I do care. I love you."

I hugged him tightly.

"It was REAL,"He said.

"I know,"I said, and petted his head,"I know."

John and I went out of the bathroom. Sammy came up to us, asking if John was okay.

"I'm fine Sammy,"John said.

John's POV

_Wednesday, July 4..._

I'm not fine. Sammy, Brian, and Claire were going to the park for a picinic, where Brian's father, Andy's parents, Andy, and Allison would meet them later. Meanwhile, I couldn't leave the bedroom that morning. I told Sammy and Claire that I was sick, a blatant lie, and that they should go without me. The reluctantly agreed. After they left, I went in the living room and lied on the couch, and, making sure no one was around, began to cry. Loud, deep, sobs that made it hard to breathe; tears that stung as they left my eyes. I clenched my fists as I grabbed the hair on my head and pulled hard on it. Some hairs came out. I continued to do so, for what seemed like hours. It was hard for me. Hard to miss the people I hate so much. I couldn't even close my eyes without seeing them. _**These damn nightmares! Why do I miss my parents? I hate them! Don't I? They hate me. Why? What did I do? I must be unlovable.**_ I looked in the mirror in our bedroom. My eyes and face were red, soaked with tears. _**I used to be tough, what the hell happened?**_ I began sobbing again.

Brian's POV

I went into Sammy's house to get the jacket that I'd left behind. It was only three and was supposed to get chilly later. When I got inside, using Claire's house key, I heard a light sobbing noise. It was coming from John's room. I went to see what it was. That's when I saw John, crying and glaring at his reflection in the mirror.

"Now I see why they hated me,"John said, to no one in particular.

"John,"I asked.

He turned around and looked at me.

"Brian,"He said,"What are you doing here?"

"I had to get my sweater,"I said,"What's wrong? Who hates you?"

"My parents,"He said,"I used to be tough Brian, now I'm a coward, useless."

"You're not useless John,"I assured him,"What happened?"

"You can't tell Claire or Sammy about this,"He said,"Please. I don't want them to worry."

"Okay."

"I've been having nightmares,"He said,"About my parents, mostly. And flashbacks. I'm starting to miss them. I hate them, but I miss them."

"Sammy misses them too,"I admitted,"She told me."

He nodded and sniffled. John looked in the mirror again.

"What's wrong with me,"He asked.

"Nothing,"I said,"Listen, they were drunks. Forget about them."

He faced me with a look that said he would punch me in the face. Instead, he laughed and smiled.

"You're probably right,"He said.

He sat on the bed and pulled back his hair. I sat next to him. He looked at me, teary eyed, and said: "I'm scared." I put my arm around his shoulder in a brotherly way.

"They're in jail,"I assured him,"They can't hurt you."

"Yeah,"He said,"But what if my old man decides to hunt me down when he gets out."

"He won't,"I said.

He buried his head in his hands and began to cry again.

"I can't,"He said, standing up"There's nothing left."

"How long have you been crying,"I asked.

"A few minutes,"He said.

I gave him a look that said I didn't believe him. He sighed.

"Since you guys left,"He admitted.

"You should come with us,"I suggested,"To the park."

"Okay,"He said, wiping his eyes.

He followed me out the door after getting dressed. I grabbed my jacket and walked with John down to the park. There, I gave Claire back her key and sat by Sammy at the picnic table. John and I ran over to them. I put my arm around Sammy. Claire grabbed John's hand.

"Is your dad coming,"Sammy asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"He didn't want me to come here alone."

Sammy nodded.

"Sammy,"I asked.

"Yeah,"She said.

"Can I talk to you,"I asked,"Alone?"

"Can't you say it in front of John and Claire,"She asked.

"No,"I whispered.

"Why not,"She asked.

"It's about them,"I whispered, "Well...about John."

She looked at me with understanding and pulled me away from Claire and John.

"What is it,"She asked,worried,"Is he okay?"

"He was crying, Sammy,"I said,"He wasn't sick. He told me he started when we left. I'm not supposed to tell you, or Claire."

"Why not?"

"He didn't want you to worry,"I said.

"He's my brother..."

"I know."

I told her what John said.

"He misses them too,"She whispered.

John's POV

My heart sank as soon as Claire grabbed my hand. She hates me, I can feel it. Sammy too, even Brian, maybe everyone.

"Feel better John,"Claire asked.

"Yeah,"I said.

When Sammy and Brian came back, Sammy sat by me and hugged me. I knew Brian had told her. I remembered that time three years ago, when she came to me, covered in blood, and I didn't do anything. I didn't know.

"It was my fault,"I mumbled quietly to myself,"I didn't think he could..."

"It's okay John,"Sammy said.

I looked at Sammy, trying to hide my pain, but I couldn't. I can't hide ANYTHING from Sammy.

Sammy's POV

John was miserable. His eyes were clouded and stormy. He looked tired.

"Are you having nightmares John,"I asked.

He nodded regretfully.

"What about,"I asked.

He glanced at me, not saying anything. I looked more closely at John. He had strands of gray hair, from stress. He looked much older than 18, like 28 or even 38. He looked so much like our father, except that John's hair was longer, and not as dark or gray. Our father would tell John to cut his hair all the time: _"Why don't you cut your hair, you freeloading scumbag! You look like a f*cking pothead!"_

**Flashback...**

**It was the first time I thought I'd lost my brother. John was 14, I was 11. Our father was yelling at John, calling him stupid and worthless.**

**"Why don't you get it yourself,"John yelled,"You lazy f*ck*ng pri..."**

**That's when he punched John, hard, and knocked out a couple teeth. I stood at the top of the stairs, and ran to my room when he started hitting John with a belt. I flinched with every hit, it was loud enough to hear in my room. I wanted to help John, but I was too scared. When I was sure it was over, I went down to see if John was okay. He was lying on the floor, blood beggining to seep through the back of his shirt. His eyes were closed, and he was hardly breathing.**

**"John,"I whispered.**

**No response. I shook him gently.**

**"John, wake up,"I said.**

**He didn't move. I tried to sit him up. He fell back to the floor, his shirt now soaked with blood. He's dead, I thought, the b*stards killed him! I began to cry over my brother. That's when I heard a mumbling sound. I looked down at John, whose eyes were half open. **

**"Sammy,"He whispered.**

**"Johnny,"I exclaimed, hugging his neck.**

**"Shh,"He whispered.**

**I helped him stand up, slowly, and went into the bathroom. He was groaning with pain and teary-eyed. He quickly removed his bloodied shirt and put it in the sink. I stifled a scream when I saw his back, bloody and full of open gashes. My hand over my mouth, as I felt like vomiting. John grabbed my other hand and held it tightly.**

**"It doesn't hurt,"He said, smiling as much as he possibly could,"Okay?"**

**I nodded, removing my hand from my mouth. I took a rag and soaked it with alcohol.**

**"Ready Johnny,"I asked.**

**"Yeah,"He said quietly.**

**He whimpered as I dabbed the rag on his back.**

**"John,"I said,"The skin's loose."**

**"I know,"He said,"It's fine."**

**"Hand me that,"I said, pointing to the gauze.**

**His back wasn't bleeding anymore. He handed me the roll of gauze. I helped him wrap it around his wounds. **

**"Done,"He asked.**

**"Yeah,"I said.**

**I slung his arm around my shoulder and helped him to my room. He lied on my bed, on his side. Tears of pain ran from his eyes.**

**"Thanks Sammy,"He mumbled.**

**He fell asleep. He stayed asleep for the rest of the day, and through the night.**

_Present..._

Andy came along later along with his parents, Brian's father, and Allison. We had a picnic for dinner.

We had sandwiches(which I made), chips, soda, and chocolate. Brian put his arm around me and joked that he could taste just a hint of anthrax.

"Don't forget the jelly,"I joked.

We both laughed.

Later was the fireworks show. I watched closely, Brian took pictures with his Polaroid, Claire watched and John began to fall asleep. Andy's parents and Brian's father were also watching, while Andy and Allison were off somewhere, doing whatever.

The fireworks were over by about midnight. Claire, John and I drove home, while the others went in a separate car. When we got home, John and Claire went in their room and I went to mine and immediately fell asleep.

John's POV

I grabbed the tickets from the drawer I'd kept them hidden in. Our honeymoon destination.

"Claire,"I said.

"Yeah,"She asked.

"I have a surprise for you,"I said.

"What is it?"

"Remember when you said you wished you were on a plane to France,"I asked.

"What did you do,"She asked with mock suspicion.

I handed her the tickets.

"France,"She exclaimed.

"For our honeymoon,"I said,"And hotel reservations."

She squealed with excitement. She hugged me and kissed me on the lips.

"Thank you John,"She exclaimed.

"Thank your grandparents,"I said,"They helped pay for it."

I scooted into bed next to Claire after turning the light off. She cuddled next to me and I put my arm around her. _**She really loves me. N**_**o she doesn't. No one can love you.**_** Shut up.**_I still hear his voice in my head.


	31. John and Claire's Wedding

_Thursday July 19..._

Sammy walked into the living room and handed me an envelope with papers in it.

"What is this,"I asked.

"Custody papers,"She said,"Fill them out, so you can have legal custody of me."

I took the envelope and looked at the papers. Sammy's eyes were watering.

"Sammy,"I asked.

"I don't want to go to a foster home, Johnny,"She said.

"Did you think I wouldn't want you,"I asked.

She shook her head.

"Why would you think that,"I asked.

She sat next to me.

"I thought you would send me away,"She said,"Like in my dream."

"What dream?"

"The dream I had the night I found this in the mail,"She said,"You said you wouldn't sign it, and that you were sending me away. You said it was..for the best."

"I'll sign it for you,"I said,"You don't have to worry. Will you hand me a pen?"

She reached into her pocket and handed me a pen.

"How long have you had this,"I asked.

"About three days,"She said,"I didn't want to show you."

"When's it due?"

"August tenth. Before school starts."

I began filling out the papers while Sammy watched.

"Thanks John,"She said.

She hugged me.

"You're welcome,"I said,"Now when's your birthday?"

"November seventh,"She said,"You know that."

"Yeah. Just messing with you."

She laughed.

"Two weeks John."

"Huh?"

"Until you get married."

"Two weeks and a day."

_Sunday, July 29..._

I walked into the kitchen to find Sammy messing with cake mix.

"Why are you playing with food,"I asked.

"I'm making a cake,"She said.

"For what?"

"Claire's birthday."

"Oh, okay."

She poured the batter into the pan. I put the pan in the oven for her. After the cake was done, Sammy decorated it with white icing and pink icing words that said:'HAPPY 18TH B-DAY!' Sammy took the cake to Claire, who was lying in bed.

"Surprise cake,"Sammy said.

Claire sat up. She stretched and followed us into the kitchen.

"Thanks Sammy,"Claire said as she took a slice,"John."

"Have you been to the doctor, Claire,"I asked.

She nodded, then set down her cake and wrapped her arms around me.

"Yes,"She said,"And he's fine."

"He?"

"Or she."

Sammy's POV

I went outside just as Brian came to the door, walking a puppy on a leash. We sat down on the steps in the front yard, the puppy jumping up and licking me. I petted the dog's head.

"Her name's Penny,"Brian said,"We think she's about a year old."

"What kind is it,"I asked.

"Don't know,"He said,"It's a stray. I found it on the street, and my dad let me keep it."

Penny jumped up on my lap. Brian grabbed my hand.

"Guess what,"Brian said.

"What?"

"My dad is selling the house,"He said.

"Really?"

"Yeah. We're staying at Andy's house untill we can sell it and get a new one."

"Hmm."

"Know what else"

"No. What?"

"I have a brother,"He said.

"Where,"I asked.

" Visiting my house. He might've left by now. My dad had a girlfriend in college. I guess they had a baby together, but she didn't tell him. He showed up yesterday. He lives in Chicago."

"How old is he?"

"About twenty."

Brian's POV

"What's wrong Bri,"Sammy asked.

"I was searching through some boxes,"I said,"Before we moved, you know? And..well..I found these papers..."

"What kind of papers?"

I told her.

"Are you sure,"She asked.

"They seem pretty legal."

"Are you going to talk to your dad?"

"Yeah."

I hugged her and she kissed me. I began to walk back to Andy's house.

"Come on, Penny,"I said.

The pup lead eagerly on the leash, but tired out halfway through, so I had to carry her. At Andy's house, I set Penny down. She ran to her water bowl and slurped greedily. I went up to my room and grabbed the file folder full of papers I'd taken from the closet in my old house. I grabbed them and took them to the kitchen, where my dad was sitting, and slammed them on the table in front of him.

"Why didn't you tell me,"I demanded.

"Where did..."

"Why didn't you tell me i was ADOPTED?!"

"Brian,"He said,"We wanted to tell you. But.."

"That's why you were so hard on me,"I shouted,"I did my best, but it was never good enough for you! I wasn't really yours, and you resented me for it."

"Son.."

"YOU'RE NOT MY FATHER! You HAVE a son, and it's NOT ME!"

I stormed up the stairs to my room, tears streaming down my face, and plopped down on my bed. I was crying and sniffling, but trying to stop. _**Why did he lie?**_ Penny soon ran into the room and jumped on my bed, trying to lick the tears off my face. She eventually settled down, doing a cute puppy yawn, then curling up into a ball and falling asleep.

My father walked by my room later. He stopped in front of my door.

"Who are they,"I asked.

"Who?"

"My real parents,"I said.

"I don't know,"He said.

"How could you not know?!"

"Are you sure you want to know,"He asked.

"Yes,"I demanded,"Tell me."

"They never found your parents,"He started.

"Found them?"

"Someone found you in a dumpster,"He said, with a choke in his voice.

They threw me away. Like trash.

"Why...?"

"I don't know,"He said,"We found you at an orphanage."

"Did you really love me?"

"From day one,"He said.

"Is that why you pushed me so hard,"I asked,"'Cause you love me?"

"You're very smart Brian,"He said,"I forget that you're still young. Only a teenager."

I walked over and hugged him. Right then, at that moment, I hated him. But I needed a human touch... something ...so that I didn't feel suffocated by garbage.

_Wednesday, August 1..._

My dad got me up early in the morning. We, along with Andy and his parents, were going on a plane to Niagara Falls. We met with John, Claire, Sammy, Claire's grandparents, a few of John's friends, Claire's friends and some family, and Allison. Andy's neighbor was taking care of Penny while we were gone. Our flight left at 10 am. On the plane, I sat between my dad, who got a window seat, and one of John's friends, who looked like he wanted to pummel me. The kid sitting beside me looked about twenty, had long black hair, wore leather gloves and black clothes, and was muscular. He removed his gloves and looked at me, almost glaring.

"What,"I asked.

"You Brian?"

"Yeah,"I said,"Who's asking?"

"I am."

"And who the hell are you?"

"Matt,"He said,"I've known John since the first grade."

"Why didn't you go see him in the hospital,"I asked.

"I've seen him in the hospital enough."

"You knew about his parents?"

"We all did,"He said,"Not like our family treated us real well either."

"He has a sister,"I said,"Did you know that?"

"Yeah,"He said,"A few of us did. He didn't want anyone messing with her."

"Did John...tell anyone about his parents?"

"Just us,"He said,"He didn't bother telling any adults. They wouldn't believe him. John had it worse than any of our group. Our parents just hit or ignored us. But John...his parents tried to break him. They almost did. But I told him to toughen up, and fight back."

"What happened?"

"F*cking got worse,"He said,"John didn't care. He stopped caring."

We stayed at a hotel near the Falls. I shared a room with my dad.

"Brian, are you okay,"My dad asked.

"No! Why would I be. My whole life has been a lie!"

"I was going to tell you..."

"When?!"

"When you were old enough."

"I'm not a kid, dad,"I shouted,"Was Maggie adopted too?!"

"No."

"So she's your real daughter,"I reflected,"But I'm not your real son."

"Brian, you are my real son,"He said,"A paper doesn't change that...it doesn't matter."

"Yes it does,"I demanded,"You've always treated me differently. Admit it, you've always liked Maggie better. Maybe they should've left me in that dumpster."

"Don't say that..."

"I'm sorry,"I said,"Whatever I did to make you guys treat me like you did, I'm sorry."

"I overreacted,"He said,"I never meant to hurt you."

"I was scared,"I said,"Ever since I got sent home for the flare gun, you AND mom started hitting me."

I lifted my shirt to show him the mostly faded bruise on my side.

"What happened,"He asked.

"Mom kicked me,"I said,"I don't know why. I was just sitting there, and she started kicking me."

"Brian, there's something I need to tell you."

"What now,"I demanded.

"Your mother and I were having a lot of problems before she and Maggie passed,"He said,"We argued a lot. We were thinking of getting a divorce."

I couldn't think of anything to say, so I sat in stunned silence.

"There was a lot of stress,"He said,"And we took it out on you, and I'm sorry."

_Friday, August 3..._

Sammy's POV

I was lined up with the two other bridesmaids, who were Claire's friends, at the alter where John waited for Claire. It was a relatively small wedding, twenty or thirty people. John was standing, staring at the door.

"Nervous John,"I asked.

"Yeah,"John said.

"The wedding doesn't start for ten minutes,"I said.

"I know."

"Hey John,"I joked,"Maybe she ran off to Mexico."

This earned a laugh from the bridesmaids and Brian, the best man.

"Very funny,"John said sarcastically,"Absolutely HILARIOUS."

"Very funny,"He said sarcastically,"Just hilarious."

Soon after everyone got in their seats and the priest, ring-bearer and piano player got in thier spots, the main door opened. Claire appeared, arm locked with her grandfather, both were smiling.

John's POV

Time slowed down as I saw Claire walk in though the door, an angel in a white dress. It seemed that she walked at a snail's pace. _**Maybe she was, I don't know. Maybe I'm dreaming. I think I'm dreaming.**_She got closer to me up at the aisle. Her grandfather released her arm and she walked up, standing by me on the alter. **_Yep, I'm dreaming. _**

The priest began the ceremony: "**We are gathered together here to unite this man, John Bender and this woman, Claire Standish in the bonds of matrimony. Should anyone object, speak now, or forever hold your peace."**

He continued, speaking to me: "**Do you, John Bender, take this woman Claire Standish, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in heath, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her for as long as you both shall live?"**

"I do,"I said.

He now spoke to Claire: **"Do you, Claire Standish, take this man John Bender, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in heath, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto him for as long as you both shall live?"**

"I do,"She said.

The ring-bearer gave us our rings. We put them on our fingers.

The priest continued: **"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride."**

Claire's POV

John raised the veil covering my face and we kissed softly. The best kiss I've ever had, and it was minty. The audience clapped and cheered.

After that was the party. There was a giant sweet three-layer cake, sandwiches and other foods. John and I sat at a table with Sammy and Brian. Brian was busy scarfing down sandwiches by the time John and I began opening presents. A blender, silverware, and other things usually presents at weddings were there.

Back in the hotel room, we both got changed out of our wedding clothes and back into regular clothes. John went to the bathroom and came back out a minute later. He scooped me up in his arms. I laughed. He set me on the bed and sat next to me.

"Hey Claire,"He inquired.

"Yeah,"I asked.

"You know what the married couple does after the wedding,"He joked,"Don't you?"

I laughed and pulled him toward me.

"Is it something like this,"I joked.

Sammy's POV

I was sitting with Brian in the hotel lobby.

"I asked about being adopted,"Brian said.

"What did he say,"I asked.

"I was found in a dumpster,"He said,"Someone threw me away."

I put my arm around him.

"My parent were going to get a divorce,"He said,"Before the wreck."

Later, John and Claire wanted to talk to Andy's parents, Brian, Brian's father, Andy and me.

"Claire and I are going to France for a couple weeks for our honeymoon,"John said,"And Kim..can Sammy stay with you?"

"Of course,"Kim said.

"When are you leaving,"I asked.

"Tomorrow,"Claire said,"At noon."

I stood over by John.

"I'll miss you Johnny,"I said.

"It's only two weeks Sammy,"He said.

"I know,"I said,"But we've never been apart that long."

"I've been without you for three years,"John joked.

"John..."

"I'll call everyday,"He said,"Okay?"

"Okay,"I said.

John hugged me. I followed him and Claire back to the hotel room.

"John,"I said,"Before you go, I need to talk to you."

"About what,"He asked.

Brian's POV

I was walking around the floor in my hotel room while my dad was at a gas station. A knock at the door. I opened it, and let in John. He shut the door behind him.

"I need to talk to you,"He said.

"About what,"I asked.

"You and Sammy,"He said,"And the day after prom."

The day after...then it hit me. That was the day I lost my virginity. The day Sammy and I first...

"Who told.."

"Sammy told me,"He said,"But I kind of figured it out."

"How?"

"You two acted differently around each other,"He said.

I looked away nervously.

"I'm not mad,"He said.

"You're not?"

"Well, a little,"He said,"But, you're still alive aren't you?"

"I never pressured her, John,"I said.

"I know,"He said,"I never thought you were using her. Are you?"

"No,"I said,"I love her."

"She loves you too,"He said,"She told me. And, with all the shit she's been through, she trusts you. Don't fuck it up, Brian."

"I won't."

"Good,"He said,"Oh, and one more thing."

"What's that?"

"If you EVER hurt her,"He started,"Or break her heart, I will break every fucking bone in your body. Got it?"

I nodded.

"Got it."

"Bye Brian,"He said.

"Bye John."

He left. My dad came back later.

John's POV

_Saturday, August 3..._

I hugged Sammy and said good bye to everyone. Claire hugged Sammy and her grandparents and said goodbye, then we boarded the plane. I hated leaving Sammy, but at least she was safe with Kim and Rick. I got a window seat, and Claire sat by me, holding my hand. I looked out the window at the runway, then back at her. As the plane took off, I removed my hand gently from Claire's and continued looking out the window. I watched as the city got smaller and smaller. I_**'m married. She's pregnant. We're going to France. So, why am I miserable? Why does my heart hurt?**_ I felt a lump in my throat.

"John,"Claire asked,"Are you okay?"

_**She doesn't know. Let's keep it that way.**_ I turned to her.

"Yeah,"I said,"Just looking outside."

"Pretty, isn't it?"

"Yeah,"I agreed.

I looked back out the window. _**She doesn't have to know. What's the worst that can happen?**_

Sammy's POV

We got back to Andy's house by late afternoon. Allison hung out at the house for a while, her parents weren't home. Brian slept on the couch, allowing me to sleep in his bed.

_Sunday, August 4..._

The next morning, I went on a walk with Brian.

"Where are we going,"Brian asked.

"You'll see,"I said,"Just follow me."

I held Brian's hand as we walked down a few blocks, into a slightly run-down neighborhood. I looked at the houses as I walked by them, stopping in front of a stained white-ish house, old, with paint starting to crack and chip, and a for sale sign in the front yard(which had yellow and brown grass). I looked at Brian.

"What is this,"He asked.

"It's my house, Bri,"I said,"I grew up here."

"Sammy, maybe we should..."

I stepped forward, walking toward the house, and pulled him along.

"Come on,"I said.

I led him to the front door, which was locked, but the window wasn't.

"Sammy,"He said,"I think this is illegal."

I climbed in through the window.

"I need to show you,"I said.

He agreed and climbed in after me. He shut the window behind him.

"This is the living room,"I said.

Torn couch, peeling paint on the walls, shitty old TV set, dirty old carpeting. I pulled Brian along to the kitchen.

"Kitchen,"Brian inquired.

"Good observation,"I joked,"You can see the decades old stove and fridge."

He laughed. We walked up the creaky wooden staircase to John's room. The posters were gone, the room was empty, except for the matress, which John left behind. We continued to my old room, which was empty. I'd taken my bed and mini fridge with me.

"My room,"I said.

I showed him the bathroom, which was next to my room.

"Where I treated John's wounds,"I said.

We went to the other side of the hallway, the last door in the hallway, my parent's room. I closed my eyes and pushed the door open(The knob was broken). The room was mostly empty, except for a bed and small dresser drawer. _**That fucking dresser!**_ I walked over in front of it.

"It was right here,"I mumbled.

I smoothed my hand against the corner edge, where my head hit. I could feel it, feel my head hit the drawer's edge, and him covering my mouth as I struggled and screamed.

Brian's POV

Sammy screamed at the top of her lungs with pure hatred and slammed the dresser on its side. She started kicking the drawer, kicking a hole in it.

"FUCK YOU,"She screamed,"I HATE YOU!FUCKING BASTARD!"

She took an empty drawer out of the dresser and began hitting it against the wall.

"WHY DID YOU DO IT,"She demanded,"YOU FUCKED ME UP! WHY?! WHY.."

_**This was where IT happened. Where her father hurt her, where he raped her. The exact fucking spot.**_ She threw the drawer across the room and I pulled her away from the dresser. She was whimpering and crying loudly. I held her so that her head rested on my shoulder untill she stopped hyperventilating. She finally looked up at me.

"Let's go,"I said gently.

She nodded and followed me out the door.

"I haven't been in there,"She said,"Never again. NEVER."

She sat down in the hallway. I thought she was going to cry again, but she didn't. I sat next to her.

"I took a shower,"She said,"After it happened. But I still felt dirty. That didn't go away, not for a while."

I put my arm around her and pulled her close once again.

"I shouldn't have gone in there,"She said,"It was stupid. I should've known."

"Sammy it wasn't your.."

"Yes it was,"She said,"John thinks it was his, but it's mine. I was stupid, thinking they cared about me."

I stood up and helped her up. We snuck back out of the old house and back to the sidewalk.

"He'll get out of jail,"She said,"And he'll come after me. What then?"

"Then, I won't let him touch you,"I promised,"I won't let him anywhere near you. Neither will John. I promise."

Back at Andy's house, Sammy got a call from John. My father was in the hallway.

"Where'd you guys go,"He asked.

"On a walk,"I said.

"For almost two hours,"He asked.

"Okay fine,"I said,"Sammy showed me her old house."

"Oh,"He said.

"There's something about her, Dad,"I said.

"What's that?"

"She's got a massive chip on her shoulder,"I said.

"What sort of chip,"He inquired.

"She..she was raped,"I said quietly.

"Did they ever catch the guy,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"Her father."

"Holy shit,"He said.

I nodded.

"She blames herself,"I said,"But don't tell her I told you. She wants it to be a secret."


	32. Sammy Date Reference Guide (Revised)

1966

March 22- Andrew Clark born

April 30- Allison Reynolds born

May 20- John Bender born

August 3- Claire Standish born

1968

February 14- Brian Johnson born

1969

November 7- Samantha Bender born

1984

May 5- Prom

May 6- Brian loses his virginity

May 7- Brian and Sammy fix the elephant lamp

May 20- John's 18th birthday

May 21- Sammy hit by car

May 25- Last day of school

May 27- Graduation day

May 30- Allison's party & Brian reunites with his father

June 2- Brian at John & Claire's party

June 8- Funeral for Brian's mother and sister& Brian runs away

June 10- "Ransom note" in the mailbox

June 23- Sammy has a nightmare

July 4- John breaks down

July 19- John signs custody papers & Brian confronts his father

August 1- Brian meets one of John's friends & learns about his parents divorce

August 3- John and Claire's wedding

August 4- John and Claire leave for France

August 5- Sammy and Brian revisit Sammy's old home

August 18- Claire and John return

August 20- Nick harasses Sammy

September 3- Sammy and John visit Brian at the dorm

September 15- Sammy is raped


	33. Sammy & Brian Go Back to School

_Monday, August 13..._

"When do you go back to school,"I asked.

"The twentieth,"Sammy said,"When do you go to college?"

"September first,"I said.

"I'll miss you,"She said.

"I'm not going anywhere,"I said,"We'll see each other every day."

_Saturday, August 18.._

Sammy's POV

John and Claire got home that day. John picked me up like a little kid and hugged me. We went back to our house.

"I missed you Johnny,"I said.

"I missed you too, Sammy,"John said.

"How was your trip Johnny,"I asked.

"Terrific,"He said.

_Monday, August 20..._

John drove me to my first day of my junior year.

"Good luck Sammy,"He said, kissing me on the head.

I hugged him.

"Love you Johnny,"I said.

"Love you too, sis,"He said.

I went in to my first hour class, English. Larry was in that class with me. He'd gotten bigger over the summer, taller and more muscular.

"Hey Larry,"I said.

"Hi Sammy,"He said quietly.

"What happened to you,"I asked.

He laughed.

"I went to the gym,"He said.

I walked home after school. I was stopped down the street by my ex.

"What the hell do you want,"I demanded.

"What's wrong, Sammy,"He taunted,"Is Johnny not here to protect you?"

"WHAT DO YOU WANT,"I demanded again.

"What I always wanted from you,"He said,"I know you'll give it to me."

"GET AWAY FROM ME."

"Why? You had no problem spreading your WHORE legs for that Brian kid!"

"You BASTARD!"

I tried to punch him, but he grabbed my wrist.

"You were always so temperamental,"He said.

I tried to leave, but he wouldn't let go of me.

"What are you doing to her,"A voice yelled.

He let go of me, and was punched in the face by Larry. He walked away, staring angrily at me.

"Are you okay,"Larry asked.

"Yeah."

"Who is he,"Larry asked.

"His name is Nick Wilford,"I said,"He's my ex boyfriend. I dated him before Brian."

_Monday, Sept. 3..._

I let John drop me off and pick me up from school after that. I didn't want to face Nick again, I was afraid.

John and I visited Brian at his dorm. He had a roommate, named Dan. Brian's dad had helped Brian unpack over the weekend.

"It's nice Brian,"I said,"Do you like it?"

"Yeah,"Brian said.

John waited in the car while I continued to talk to Brian.

"You remember Nick,"I asked Brian.

"Nick?"

"My ex."

"Oh. Yeah."

"Well, he's been acting..weird lately,"I said.

"Weird how?"

I told him about the first day of school. He hugged me.

"It's probably nothing,"I said,"See you, Bri."

I kissed him and went out to the car.

_Friday, Sept 7..._

Nick was watching me. Everytime I walked in the hall, he watched me. Larry volunteered to be my bodyguard at school. Henry even called my house a few times, asking for me. I kept telling him to leave me the hell alone, but he wasn't getting the message.

_Saturday, Sept. 15..._

John dropped me off at the college to go see Brian. I went into the building, down the hall toward the elevator. I heard a door open, then someone pulled me into a room. Someone pinned me against a wall. I was looking at Nick. There were two other guys in the room, who looked around John's age, one with short brown hair and one with long orange hair.

"These are my college buddies,"Nick said.

I ran for the door, Nick grabbed me.

"Stay here and have some fun,"He said.

He pushed me onto the bed.

"You know,"He said,"You've done a real good job avoiding me. Till now."

"What are you gonna do to me,"I asked fearfully.

"I'm going to get what I wanted,"Nick said.

The guy with brown hair went to the left side of me and held my arm up near the bedpost. The guy with orange hair did the same to my other arm. Nick climbed on me and began taking my clothes off.

"No,"I screamed.

The guy with brown hair clamped his hand down over my mouth. I closed my eyes tightly. My heart stopped. _**AHHHHHH!**_Tears ran from my eyes.

"Can I go next,"One of the guys asked.

"Whatever,"Nick demanded,"Just shut up!"

_**.**_

_**..**_

_**...**_

_**The pain. Where am I? How long have I been here? Who's hand is that?**_ I kept my eyes clamped shut. I didn't want to see what was happening. _**It's hopeless. I can't escape. How many more are there?**_

Brian's POV

"She's an hour late,"I said,"Where is she?"

"I don't know,"Dan said,"Maybe she's lost."

"I'm gonna go look for her,"I said.

"Okay."

Sammy's POV

I felt the hand on my mouth disappear. I thought they were gone, but I still kept my eyes shut. When I was sure they were gone, I screamed.

Brian's POV

I took the elevator to the bottom floor. I went down the hall untill I heard a scream coming from one of the rooms. I ran to the room it came from. The door was unlocked. I opened it and looked in. I saw Sammy lying on the bed without any clothes on, and I ran to her.

"Oh my god,"I exclaimed,"What happened to you?"

"No.."She mumbled.

"Sammy, it's me,"I said,"Brian."

She opened her eyes and looked at me.

"Don't look at me,"She mumbled.

I picked up her clothes off the floor and handed them to her. I looked away as she put them on. I helped her up. Blood leaked through her pants. I found a phone and called an ambulance. I rode with her to the hospital.

John's POV

Brian called me on the phone. He told me that Sammy was in the hospital. I drove down with Claire to see her. Sammy was in room 158. Brian was in one of the chairs.

"What happened,"I asked.

"She..she was raped,"Brian said, his voice breaking,"She needed stitches."

I ran over to Sammy's bedside. She was sleeping.

"She's tired,"Brian said,"They gave her some pain medicine."

"Why didn't you call me earlier,"I asked.

"She didn't want me to call,"He said,"She thought you'd be angry."

I touched her hand gently. She opened her eyes.

"Johnny,"She asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"I'm here. And I'm not angry."

She nodded and squeezed my hand.

"Who did this to you,"I asked.

"Three,"She said.

"Three?"

"There were three guys,"She said.

"Did you see them,"I asked.

"Yeah,"She said,"It was Nick. And two of his 'college buddies'."

"That SONOFABITCH,"I yelled,"I'LL KILL HIM!"

"There's something else,"She said.

"What's that,"I asked.

"He's been watching me,"She said,"Since the first day of school. He watched me in the hallways, talking to my friends."

"I should've stayed with you,"I said,"I didn't know..I'm sorry."

"You couldn't have known,"She said.

She started to cry. I sat down on the bed and hugged her as she sat up a little. she sobbed heavily onto my shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about it,"I asked.

Her breath was quavering. She shook her head.

"I can't,"She said,"Not yet."

"The doctor asked earlier,"Brian said,"They're going to file a police report."

"Johnny, I've never been so scared,"She whispered.

I hugged her tightly again.

"I'm right here, Sammy,"I assured her,"And I'm not going to leave you."

Sammy's POV

It was getting late. John was starting to fall asleep on the bed. I shook him.

"Johnny,"I said.

"Yeah,"He asked.

"You're falling asleep,"I said.

"Oh."

He stood up, kissed me on the forehead, and sat on the chair next to me.

"Good night,"He said,"Love you sis."

"Love you too,"I said.

Brian's POV

I was nudged awake by someone whispering my name. I opened my eyes and saw Sammy standing in front of me.

"What are you doing up,"I whispered.

"I thought he would stop,"She said,"I didn't think it would get this far."

She blinked back tears. I grabbed her hand.

"Larry helped me,"She said,"He was my bodyguard, at school."

She put her hand gently behind my neck.

"Brian...I'm sorry,"She said.

"For what,"I asked.

"I feel like...I...cheated on you,"She said.

"No,"I assured her,"No way."

She was crying again. She ran her fingers through my hair.

"Was this the first time he's done this to you,"I asked.

She nodded.

"Are you sure,"I asked.

"He's tried,"She said,"But I've been able to fight him off."

"He won't get away,"I assured her,"They'll catch him. And the other guys."

"I don't want to sleep alone,"She said,"Will you...sleep in the bed with me?"

"Sammy, I can't,"I said,"John will kill me."

"Just untill I fall asleep,"She begged,"Please?"

"Okay."

Sammy's POV

I went to lie down on the bed. Brian followed me, holding my hand. We slipped quietly under the blankets. I leaned my head against his chest, soaking his shirt with my tears. I could feel the thump-thump-thump of his heartbeat. He slipped his arms around me and held me close. In his arms, I felt safe and secure, nothing could touch me. The rhythm of his heart and the comfort I felt lulled me to sleep.

Brian's POV

I woke up in the morning to John yanking me out of the bed and pinning me up against a wall.

"You have EXACTLY TEN SECONDS to tell me just WHY THE HELL you were LAYING in my sister's HOSPITAL BED!"

"John,"I said,"She WANTED me to sleep with her."

He punched me in the face. Okay..wrong choice of words.

"I mean...sleep IN the bed with her,"I said,"John, I didn't do anything, WE didn't do anything. I swear!"

He put me down.

"All right, I believe you,"He said.

All the yelling woke Sammy up.

"What are you doing to him, John,"She asked.

"John caught me in your bed,"I said.

_Tuesday, Sept. 18..._

Sammy's POV

I decided to skip school Monday. John let me. When there I was met by Larry, who asked me what happened.

"It's a long story,"I said.

"People are saying things,"He said.

"Things?"

"Yeah,"He said,"Things. Like that you went to a college party over the weekend. And slept with a bunch of guys."

"DAMN IT,"I exclaimed,"It wasn't like that."

"I figured,"He said,"So what happened?"

"Where's Nick,"I asked.

"I don't know,"He said,"I heard he was in jail."

"So, he's not here,"I asked.

"No, why?"

"I don't want him to hear what I'm about to tell you,"I said.

"What is it?"

"Don't tell anyone, okay?"

"Yeah, okay."

I sighed.

"I was visiting Brian in college on Saturday,"I said quietly,"And...when I got into his dorm...I was pulled into a room..Nick was there, along with two college age guys. He pushed me onto the bed...the other two held me down...I couldn't move..I couldn't scream either, they had a hand over my mouth.."

"You okay?"

"I think so,"I said,"For now."

I was visited at home by the police who asked me to describe the attackers.

"Nick Wilford,"I said,"About seventeen, blonde spikey hair. Five foot four. The second guy..long orange hair, shoulder length. He was about college age, eighteen or older. Tall, maybe six feet. Tattoo on his neck. He had a purple shirt on, blue jeans, and boots. The last one...short brown hair. Also college age. About as tall as Nick, but strong, muscular. Big hands, he clamped one over my mouth."

"You did great, Sammy,"John told me later.

THIRD PERSON POV

Blaine was pacing the floor nervously.

"What's your problem,"Tristen asked.

"Last Saturday, that's my problem,"Blaine said.

"What are you talking about,"Tristen asked.

"You know DAMN well what I'm talking about,"Blaine demanded,"The blood on the bed, the girl we raped!"

"We didn't rape her! She's a prostitute."

"Oh yeah? Then why was she struggling? Why'd we have to hold her down?"

"Look, she's a whore. End of story."

"Who is she?"

"Doesn't matter."

"WHO THE HELL IS SHE?!"

Tristen sighed.

"She's Nick's ex girlfriend, Samantha, or something. He wanted to teach her a lesson."

"We won't get away with this,"Blaine said,"They'll catch us."

"Not if you keep your FUCKING MOUTH SHUT, they won't."

_Thursday, Sept. 20..._

Sammy's POV

I walk into Brian's dorm with John. John disappears. I go into the room, Brian isn't there. The place is empty, except for a bed. Someone grabs me from behind, covering my mouth. The person turns me around, there stands Brian. "Hey Sammy,"Brian says,"I have to go. See ya." He disappears. The guy with orange hair appears. He holds me to the bed again. The other one is there too, his hand over my mouth. "Sammy,"A voice speaks,"Wake up."

I woke up to John shaking me gently.

"John,"I said.

He hugged me.

"You were screaming,"He said,"And kicking."

"I had a nightmare,"I said,"What time is it?"

"Six fifteen,"He said.

"Ok."

"Sammy,"He said,"When you went to the hospital, did you get a uh.."

"Rape kit? Yeah."

"Good,"He said.

"I must've taken fifty showers since then,"I said,"You can't wash that off."

"They found one of the guys,"John said,"The one with orange hair. He confessed. His name is Blaine Oswin. They're taking DNA tests."

"Have they gotten Nick yet,"I asked.

"They questioned him,"He said,"And they tested him. I just don't know if they released him or not."

"This is all my fault Johnny,"I pleaded.

"Sammy, no."

"I should've told you he was stalking me,"I said,"I never thought it would get this far."

He kissed me on the head.

"I'll go make some pancakes,"He said.

John's POV

"Thanks dad,"She said,"I mean...thanks Johnny."

She blushed. I ruffled her hair and left the room. I went to the kitchen and looked for the pancake mix. She called me DAD. What did she mean by that? I brushed it off and began to make breakfast. Just then, a familiar redhead in a robe and pj's walked in the kitchen.

"Morning, Claire,"I said and kissed her.

"Morning, John,"She said,"Watcha makin'?"

"Pancakes,"I said.

"I love those things,"She said.

I touched her stomach. The baby kicked.

"He likes to hear your voice, Johnny,"She said,"Not even born, and it likes you already."

I smirked and kissed her again.

"How much longer,"I asked.

"If we're lucky, only about three months,"She said.

I began cooking the pancakes.

"How about bacon,"She asked.

I ran to the fridge and got the package of bacon out. Claire watched over the pancakes. I put the bacon on to cook. When the food was done, I called Sammy into the kitchen. Claire passed out the food.

I drove Sammy to school at about 7:50.

Sammy's POV

I sat with Larry at lunch, since the friends I had last year moved and no one wants to talk to a 'slut'.

"How goes it Larry,"I asked.

"Good,"He said.

A group of prissy, stuck up senior girls walked past Larry and I at the table.

"Hey look,"the leader, Lizzy, taunted,"It's the school slut!"

"Ignore them,"Larry whispered.

"Is that your new boyfriend,"Lizzy teased,"Fucking him too?"

The group of girls giggled.

"Shut up,"I said.

"Heard about your parents,"She said,"Live with that scumbag brother of yours now?"

"Shut up about my brother,"I yelled.

Lizzy got in my face.

"What're you going to do about it,"She challenged.

I decked her in the face. She crouched down and held her nose. That didn't stop me. I tackled her and started punching her in the face. Larry pulled me away from her. We were both called to Vernon's office.

"Why the hell is going on here,"Vernon demanded.

"She punched me in the face,"Lizzy complained,"Then tackled me!"

"She called me a slut,"I defended,"And she called my brother a scumbag!"

Vernon gave me a look that said: 'he is a scumbag.'

"Samantha, detention, this Saturday,"Vernon said,"Lizzy, get back to class. Stop by the office, get some ice for your eye."

"What,"I exclaimed,"That's totally unfair!"

"You keep your mouth shut missy,"Vernon said.

"Bullshit,"I mumbled.

"That's another detention,"He said.

John's POV

I sat in the kitchen talking to Claire.

"Sammy accidentally called me dad this morning,"I said.

"So,"She asked.

"Do you think it means anything,"I asked.

"Maybe she thinks of you as a father figure,"She suggested.

"Yeah, right,"I said skeptically.

Sammy's POV

John picked me up after school.

"So, you got a detention,"He asked.

"How'd you know,"I asked.

"They called,"He said.

"Oh,"I said,"I got in a fight."

"Over what?"

"This girl, Lizzy, she's a senior. Popular, you know, like Claire. Anyways, she came up to me at the lunch table and called me a slut, then asked me if I was fucking someone. And she asked if I was living with my scumbag brother...I wanted to defend you."

He smirked.

"Vernon has it out for me,"I said,"He gave me a detention. Then another one when I said that was bullshit."

"Did she get in trouble?"

"NO. not at all."

_Saturday, Sept. 22..._

I was late to my bullshit detention, on purpose, of course. Vernon gave me a speech about keeping my mouth shut the entire time.

"It seemed to be too hard for your brother,"He said sarcastically.

"You leave John out of this,"I said,"He doesn't deserve all the shit people give him! He's a good person."

"Yeah, whatever,"He said sarcastically.

"You don't know him like I do,"I snapped,"To you, he's just some punk kid, but to me, he's my goddamn hero!"

"If you consider, scum like John Bender a hero, then something is wrong with you!"

"HE'S NOT A SCUMBAG! OUR PARENTS WERE THE SCUMBAGS! That's why they're in jail!"

Vernon left the room, muttering something under his breath.

"Fucker,"I mumbled.

I got up and searched around. I saw a familiar pair of blue eyes peeking out from behind a bookshelf. I went behind the bookshelf,and there stood Brian.

"How'd you find me,"Brian asked.

"I'd recognize those blue eyes anywhere,"I said.

I hugged him.

"You okay,"He asked.

"I guess,"I said,"But I think Vernon has it out for me."

"He has it out for everyone,"He joked.

I grabbed his hand and led him back to the table I was sitting at. He sat in the chair next to me.

"He doesn't come in here untill lunch when there's only one person,"I said,"Also, he can't hear us when we talk like this."

"I know,"He said.

"How'd you know I was in here,"I asked.

"John told me,"He said,"Asked if I could keep you company. Protect you from Vernon."

He smirked.

"Oh yeah, John's at work,"I said.

"Where does he work at, anyways,"He asked.

"Some business for Claire's grandfather,"I said,"Dunno what it's called. He used to work at a gas station."

He held my hand.

"When did you get here,"I asked.

"I snuck in right after you,"He said.

"So you heard the argument,"I said.

"Yeah,"He said.

I told him what happened last Thursday.

"What do you wanna do,"I asked.

"Reveal our deepest, darkest secrets,"He suggested.

"You already know everything about me,"I said,"You go first."

"Okay,"He said,"Before I met YOU, the closest thing I had to sex was getting off to nudie magazines in the bathroom with the door locked."

"Is that all you wanted, Bri,"I joked.

"It was untill I met you,"He said,"Those girls, they can't touch me. They're not real, but you are."

He touched my cheek.

"You're so much more..than some girl on a page."

I smiled.

"You next,"He said.

"When we first slept together,"I started quietly,"I poured every ounce of trust I had into you, which wasn't much."

"I did it to feel closer to you,"He said.

After Vernon let me get my lunch(which John made) and a coke from the cafeteria, I went back in the library and sat with Brian.

"What did you get,"He asked.

I took the things out of the bag: turkey sandwich, bag of chips, a cookie, and a chocolate bar.

"Wanna split,"I asked.

"Sure."

I gave him half the sandwich and half the chocolate bar. After we ate, I wadded up the empty bag and threw it in the trash.

"I have to come back next week,"I said.

"Maybe I can come next weekend,"He said.

"Brian?"

"Yeah?"

"At the hospital, they said I won't be able to DO anything for a while,"I said,"At least, physically. But mentally, I don't know."

"And..you think I'm going to look somewhere else,"He suggested.

"NO, it's not that,"I said,"I trust you. It's just..."

"Samantha,"He said,"I've waited sixteen years for someone like you. I'm not going to throw you away for something as small as this."

I nodded.

"Okay,"I said,"Besides, you always have your magazines. AND that picture in your wallet."

He blushed.

"It's okay Bri,"I said,"You can have your pictures."

Brian rested his head on the table, then went behind the bookshelf he hid behind earlier, and brought back a book and some papers.

"Almost forgot,"He said,"Homework."

"You are such a nerd,"I joked.

He kissed me on the nose.

"I know,"He said,"BUT, that's why you like me."

He took out his homework and started scribbling stuff down. I scooted my chair closer and leaned my head against his shoulder. He smiled and continued working.

"Today is Maggie's birthday,"He said,"She would've been nine."

He looked away from me, but I knew he was crying. I put my arm around him. He turned and hugged me, crying on my shoulder. I grabbed his hair gently and rubbed his back.

When I got home, John gave me some good news.

"They caught the other guy,"He said,"His name is Tristen Dee."

John's POV

Later that night, I snuck out into the garage, where the mini-fridge was stored, and grabbed the bottle of scotch I'd bought with my fake ID. There was half a bottle left. I downed it and hid the bottle in the bottom of the trashcan. I went inside and slid into the bed, next to Claire.

_**Is this how it starts,**_ I wondered, _**is this what my father did? No, they're drunks.**_I only wanted to hide the guilt of letting Sammy get hurt. It worked, mostly.

**WELL, THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY, YOU MAY BE SAYING. I'LL ANSWER SOME QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE ABOUT THE STORY:** **GOOD GOD!WHAT'S WITH ALL THE RAPE?** ****_GOOD QUESTION. I PROMISE YOU THAT THIS IS THE LAST TIME THAT SAMMY OR ANYONE WILL BE RAPED IN THIS STORY!_ **WHY IS JOHN SUCH A DAMN CRYBABY?** _HE HAS SIGNS OF DEPRESSION, WHICH WILL MAKE FOR A PLOT POINT IN LATER CHAPTERS._ **WHY IS BRIAN SO NICE?** I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT BRIAN FROM THE MOVIE WOULD HAVE A SWEET, ROMANTIC, CARING PERSONALITY. 


	34. Merry Christmas, John

_Saturday, Sept. 29..._

Claire's POV

Sammy had to go to detention, John was off work. I sat in the living room, watching TV. John came in and started massaging my shoulders.

"The trial's set for October twentieth,"John said.

"I hope they go to jail,"I said,"For a long time."

He kissed my cheek.

"Me too,"He said.

"Are you okay, John,"I asked.

He sat next to me.

"I've just...been thinking,"He said,"About my parents. And my house. Remembering things I thought I'd forgot."

I grabbed his hand and held it tightly. I looked at the scar of the burn on his arm.

"When did you get it,"I asked,"The burn."

"I was about ten,"He started,"Maybe eleven. Sammy and I were out in the garage, playing. She dumped over this bucket of paint, only a little spilled. I told her to go inside, hide under the bed. I took the blame...my dad was pissed. He burnt me with a cigar, threw me around a little, and called me every name in the book."

I put my hand on the back of his neck.

"It's not the only time he burned me,"He said,"Cigars, cigarettes...fucking matches."

"Sadistic bastard...,"I mumbled.

He chuckled.

"They hated me,"He said,"But, who can blame them?"

"Don't say that, Johnny,"I said,"You're perfect."

"Pshh,"He said,"I'm just about as imperfect as you can get."

"I love you,"I said.

"I love you too, Claire,"He said.

He grabbed my hands and held them

"Are you sure you're okay,"I asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure,"He said,"You wanna go out to lunch, Claire?"

"Sure."

John put one arm around my shoulders and his other hand gently on my stomach. I could see how hurt he was. It killed me seeing his heart break, and not being able to help him.

_Sunday, Sept. 29..._

Brian's POV

I stand in a forest with John. "Why did you do it Brian,"John demands. "What did I do,"I whimper. "Why did you murder her,"He shouts,"Why did you murder Samantha?!" "I didn't murder her,"I say. He slams me against a tree. "You beat her to DEATH,"He shouts,"I saw those damn bruises, you've been beating her for a while, haven't you?!" "I never hurt her,"I plead. He punches me. "After all she's done for you,"He screams,"THIS is how you repay her?!" He grabs me by the neck and throws me on the ground. "What did she do,"He demands,"Was dinner a minute late?! You just HAD to teach her a lesson, didn't you?! What did she do that PISSED YOU OFF so much that you KILLED her?!" He kicks me in the stomach and continues to hit me. "John,"I beg,"Please.." "Did she beg for mercy, too,"He yells,"I bet. And you didn't stop, did you! You just kept beating her! You KILLED HER! YOU KILLED MY ONLY SISTER!" He continues hitting me.

Dan woke me up. He told me I had visitors.

"I let them in,"He said, as he exited the door.

I got up to see John standing in front of the door. My face flushed.

"John, whatever happened to Sammy,"I said,"I didn't do it. I swear, it wasn't me."

"What are you talking about,"He asked,"Sammy's in the bathroom."

"I had this dream,"I said,"You told me I murdered Sammy. That I'd been beating her for a while."

I told him about the dream. Sammy came out of the bathroom. I hugged her. I told her about the dream too. Sammy held out her arms to Johnny.

"No bruises, Johnny,"She joked.

John laughed.

_Monday, October 1..._

Claire's POV

I sat in my bedroom, reading the story John was writing, titled The Breakfast Club. It was about the day we met in detention, from his point of view. I read to the part where Vernon locked him in the closet, which is where he left off, when John walked in.

"Reading my story,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"It's really good. You should have it published when you're done."

"Right,"He said.

He sat down.

"No, really,"I said,"One of my mom's friends works for a publishing company. I could pull some strings."

"Y..you're serious,"He asked.

"Of course."

"All right. I'll work on it."

He kissed me.

"Good,"I said.

"Hey Claire,"He said,"What did you want to be when you grew up?"

"I don't know,"I said,"I never really thought about it. What about you?"

"Dead. Or at least out of my house. I would've run away or killed myself if it weren't for Sammy. If I left, they'd start in on her."

He scooted closer to me and scooped me into a hug.

"What were you going to do,"I asked,"If none of this happened?"

"I was planning on moving out anyways,"He said,"Getting custody of Sammy, getting her out of that hellhole before it was too late."

"I was planning on college,"I said,"Before all THIS happened."

"I didn't think I'd ever have children,"He said.

"How come?"

"I'd become my father,"He said,"Start beating on the poor kid."

"John..if you treat our child with as much love and caring as you do with Sammy, you'll be the perfect father."

THIRD PERSON POV

Blaine sat in his jail cell. His lawyer tried to get him to sign a plea bargin, but he refused. Nick and Tristen couldn't give two shits for what they did to that poor girl, but he did. He couldn't stop thinking about what happened that day, playing it over and over again in his head. He saw the terror in her eyes, how she struggled and screamed. He should have left that day when Nick brought her in, called the cops, but he didn't. Tristen told him she was a prostitute, and Blaine went along with it, untill he saw the terrified girl. But he went through with it.

"Why,"He muttered to himself.

When he found out the girl was only fifteen, it struck a chord with him. His sister is sixteen. He knew he deserved every fucking sentence that he got. He wished he could undo it.

_Saturday, Oct. 20.._

The trial. The terrified girl next to her lawyer. Tristen, Blaine, and Nick on the other side. Blaine watched the girl with sympathy as she squirmed uncomfortably in her chair. She made eye contact with him for a split second, then looked away. Sheer terror.

Sammy's POV

_**He looked at me. The one with the orange hair looked at me. Why? What does he want?**_ I remembered what John told me yesterday: "If you get scared, just imagine me holding your hand. I'm here for you, Sammy." I looked back and smiled at John, Claire and Brian, who were in the audience chairs.

The judge and jury came in and the trial started. The attorneys introduced the case to the jury. I was eventually called up to tell what happened. I was shaking as I walked up to the stand. I took the oath and tried to speak.

"It's all right, Samantha,"The lawyer assured me,"Take your time."

I thought of John holding my hand. He was smiling at me from his seat.

"I was visiting my boyfriend, Brian,"I said,"At his dorm. John dropped me off in the parking lot. I went into the building where Brian's dorm room was, heading toward the elevator, since his room was on the sixth floor. I passed a few doors before I was pulled into a room. Next thing I know, Nick had me pinned against a wall. I saw two other guys in there. Nick called them his 'college buddies'."

"Will you point them out, please,"The lawyer asked.

"Sure,"I said, pointing to Nick and the two others.

"Thank you. Please continue."

"Nick pinned me to the bed,"I said,"He told me to 'stay and have fun'. When I asked what he was going to do to me, he said he was 'getting what he wanted'. The guys held my arms above my head. Nick pulled off my pants, then my underwear, then his. Nick crawled on top of me, then he.."

"Then what?"

"He raped me,"I said,"I closed my eyes, I didn't want to see what was happening. I was scared, I thought I was going to die. The pain was so intense. All three of them took turns, I'm sure of it."

"Did anything happen after that?"

"They left,"I said,"When I knew they were gone, I screamed. Brian found me. He called an ambulance."

"That will be all. Thank you Samantha."

"You're welcome,"I said, and sat back down.

Nick spoke next, then Tristen. I didn't listen to them. Then the next one, Blaine Oswin, spoke.

"Tristen told me she was a prostitute,"Blaine said,"I should've known when I saw her, the terror in her eyes, how she tried to escape. I should've left or called the police, but I didn't. I held her down while Nick and Tristen raped her."

"Did you rape her,"The lawyer asked.

"Yes,"He said,"Nick and Tristen don't care what they did, but I do. I did a TERRIBLE thing to an innocent girl. I should be punished."

Blaine looked at me for a second before he sat down. The evidence from the kit was presented and discussed. A doctor from the hospital discussed the injuries I had.

The jury went to their room to discuss the verdict. Guilty. Tristen and Nick were tried as adults.

"Nick Wilford,"The judge announced when the jury returned,"You are found guilty of stalking, rape, and conspiracy to commit a crime. I sentence you to eleven years in a state penitentiary."

"Tristen Dee. You are found guilty of rape and conspiracy to commit a crime. I sentence you to six years in a state penitentiary."

"Blaine Oswin. You are found guilty of rape, conspiracy to commit a crime, and sexual abuse of a minor. I sentence you to sixteen years in a state penitentiary."

My lawyer congratulated me after the trial. Claire and her grandparents made sure to hire the best lawyer available.

"You did a good job, Sammy,"she said,"Many rape victims are too afraid to face their attackers."

Outside of the courthouse, John hugged me tightly.

"I'm proud of you, sis,"He said,"You were really brave. I knew you would be."

"Thanks John,"I said.

"Good job, Sammy,"Claire said.

Brian held my hand as we got into the car.

"We'll get through this, Sammy,"He said quietly.

_Wednesday, Nov. 7..._

When John picked me up from school, I went in the house to see Claire, Brian, Andy's parents, and somehow Larry jump up and yell surprise. I hugged John.

"Did you plan this,"I asked.

"Claire helped,"He said.

I went to my room and threw my book-bag in there. When I came back, everyone was in the kitchen, waiting to cut the cake. John cut a piece and gave it to me. Brian sat by me with his cake.

"I need to talk to you,"I whispered,"As soon as possible."

"Okay,"Brian whispered.

After cake, we opened presents. I opened John's present first: a pair of finger-less leather gloves.

"Johnny,"I said,"Are these yours?"

"Yeah,"He said,"Not much use for them, being a father and all."

We all laughed. I opened Claire's gift: a heart shaped locket with a picture of John and her in it. Next was Brian's present: a jewelry box.

"It was all I could think of,"Brian said.

I opened the presents from Andy's parents, then from the one from Larry. Allison sent a card with money, a letter,and a picture of a painting she made of me. I made a mental note to write her back. Andy sent a card and some money.

After thanking everyone, I snuck off to my room while everyone talked. Brian followed me.

"What did you want to talk about,"He asked.

"I have to tell you something,"I said,"But you can't tell anyone, especially John."

"All right,"He said.

"I think I'm...pregnant,"I said quietly.

"Was it me,"He asked,"Or..them?"

"Them,"I said.

"My god,"He said,"Are you sure?"

"I don't know,"I said,"I still have to test."

"Do you have one,"He asked.

"I got a couple from the store,"I said,"I'm going to test tonight."

He hugged me.

"If you really are pregnant,"He whispered,"I'll be here for you."

I waited untill late that night, when John and Claire were in bed, to take the tests. I followed the instructions: pee on the stick, wait fifteen minutes, one line negative, two lines positive. I looked at the first one. It can't be. Two lines. I checked the second one. Two lines. Fuck!

_Thursday, Nov. 8..._

I didn't sleep all night. I stayed awake, crying and wondering what the hell I was going to do. I met up with Larry at school.

"I took a pregnancy test yesterday,"I told him quietly,"Positive. Both of them."

"Are you sure it's THEM,"He asked.

"It has to be,"I said,"It can't be Brian."

"Those tests aren't always accurate,"He said,"Maybe it's too early to tell."

_Monday, December 24..._

John's POV

I'd been with Claire all day in the hospital. It was almost midnight. She'd been trying since morning to get the baby out. They suggested giving her a c-section, Claire and I agreed. They prepped her for surgery. I had to wait in the waiting room with everyone while they did the surgery.

Sammy's POV

I sat in the waiting room with John, Brian, Allison, Andy, Andy's parents, and Claire's grandparents. John had driven Claire to the hospital this morning, when her water broke.

Brian's POV

Sammy dragged me out of the waiting room and into the girl's bathroom, which was completely empty. We went into the largest stall, closed it, and locked it.

"What's wrong,"I asked.

"I thought it was a fluke,"She said,"I thought the tests were wrong."

"What are you talking about,"I asked.

She lifted her shirt to show me her stomach. There was a small, barely noticeable bump. I gasped. She took my hand and put it against her stomach.

"I don't know what to do,"She said.

I hugged her.

"You're always there for me,"She said.

She grabbed my hand.

"We should go out there,"I said,"Before they come looking for us."

We went back out in the waiting room.

_Tuesday, December 25..._

Claire's POV

I woke up with pain in the stomach region. I saw the doctor.

"Looks like mommy's awake,"The doctor said.

I groaned.

"What time is it,"I asked.

"One thirty,"The doctor said,"Christmas morning. Would you like to see your baby?"

"Yes,"I said.

The doctor brought in my baby and handed it to me. A boy. I held the baby gently in my arms.

"He's beautiful,"I said.

I began to cry.

"Where's John,"I asked.

"He's in the waiting room,"The doctor said,"Would you like me to go get him?"

"Yes, please."

John's POV

The doctor came in to tell me that Claire woke up.

"Would you like to see your son,"He asked.

_**Son? I have a son.**_

"Yes,"I said, and followed him into the room Claire was in.

Claire was holding the baby. She handed him to me. I held the tiny alien creature gently in my arms. I was crying. I kissed the boy on the head.

"I love you,"I whispered to him.

The boy seemed to smile.

"Have you chosen a name for him yet,"The doctor asked.

"Yes,"Claire said,"John Bender Junior."

"John LEE Bender Junior,"I corrected.

"Merry Christmas, John,"Claire said.


	35. The Letter

Sammy's POV

We all got to see the baby in the room where they keep the newborns. Everyone else went home after a while.

Brian's POV

Claire's grandparents went home. Andy went to bed, so did Kim and Rick. I stayed in the kitchen for a while. My father woke up later, about four-thirty.

"Have you been up all night,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said.

"Is something wrong,"He asked.

_**Yeah, my girlfriend's pregnant.**_ I looked at him. From an outside perspective, he didn't LOOK like someone who would yell at or hit their own son. Neither did my mother. _**Appearances can be deceiving.**_

"No,"I said,"Nothing's wrong. Just couldn't sleep, that's all."

"There's been an offer on the house,"He said.

"Really,"I inquired.

"It's a really good offer,"He said,"I might take it."

"That's terrific."

"How's college?"

"Pretty good,"I said.

"Grades?"

_**How did I know he'd ask that?** _I sighed.

"If they're not straight A's,"I started cruelly,"Does that make me an idiot?"

"You're not an idiot,"He said.

"The elephant lamp,"I said,"Was the only F I've gotten."

"You're very smart, Brian,"He said,"You're the youngest in the family to go to college."

"YOUR family,"I said,"What about your real son? Is he good enough for you? Smart enough?"

"Brian, I love you,"He said.

"Would you still love me if I wasn't smart?"

"Of course,"He said,"Did we make you feel that way?"

I nodded.

"I'm sorry,"He said.

"You and mom,"I started,"You yelled at me for every mistake. You didn't want smart, you wanted perfection. And I'm not perfect. Why couldn't you just be proud of me for who I am?"

"I AM proud of you,"He said.

"I felt like you and mom hated me for failing,"I said.

"Why didn't you talk to us,"He said.

"I couldn't,"I said,"I couldn't talk to either of you."

Sammy's POV

I woke to John and Claire talking. It was getting light outside.

"Hey Sammy,"John said,"Wanna go to the house and pick up the gifts?"

"Me?"

"No, the other Sammy,"He kidded,"Yeah, you. Got your license?"

"In the car."

"Good,"He said, and tossed me the keys,"Be careful."

"I will,"I said.

I took the keys and went out into the car. In the car, I started the engine and checked the ketch-aw for my license. I was in there. I let the engine warm up for a couple minutes, then drove to the house. I sat in the car, parked in the driveway, keys in one hand, my other hand on my stomach. I felt the lump, squishy but soft, like a hard-boiled egg. I got the presents and loaded them into the car. I brought the presents into the hospital room. John was holding John Jr. Claire and I opened the presents, mostly baby stuff.

One of the gifts was a car seat, which we used when John and I brought the baby home. Claire had to stay at the hospital until the swelling from the surgery and the pain subsided. I held the baby while John got the crib ready. After he was done, he set John Jr. down for a nap.

John's POV

When I got back to the living room, Sammy was crying heavily on the couch.

"What's wrong,"I asked.

"I should've told you,"She said,"When I took the tests. But I wasn't sure."

"What are you talking about,"I asked.

"John, look,"She said.

She raised her shirt to show me her stomach. There was a lump. I felt it.

"Did Brian do this,"I demanded.

"No,"She said,"No, John! That's the thing...It wasn't Brian...at all."

"Fuck!"

She collapsed back onto the couch, crying. I sat by her. She buried her head into the couch pillow.

"Sit up, Sammy,"I said calmly,"I'm not mad at you."

She sat up.

"Y...you're not,"She asked.

"No,"I said,"It's not like you did it on purpose."

I put my arm around her shoulder and hugged her.

"I'm scared,"She said.

"Me too."

She wiped her tears.

"What are YOU scared of,"She asked.

"What I've ALWAYS been afraid of,"I said.

She sighed.

"You won't become like our parents,"She said.

"Maybe. Maybe not."

"Johnny, you're a better father to me...than our father EVER was."

"That means a lot coming from you, Sammy."

She nodded.

"Can I hold little Johnny,"She asked.

"Of course you can, Aunt Sammy."

She laughed.

Sammy's POV

I went into the room with John. He handed me little Johnny, and I cradled him in my arms.

_Thursday, Dec. 27..._

Claire got to come home from the hospital that day. She was still a little sore. The doctor told her to take aspirin for the pain.

_Monday, December 31..._

_**New Year's Eve-1984. 11:30 P.M.**_ Claire and John were watching the New Year's ball on the TV, waiting for the glowing ball to be dropped. Little John was in his crib, which was in the living room, right by the couch. I was watching over him as he slept. The doorbell rang. I went to answer it. Brian stood at the door.

"What are you doing here,"I asked.

"I came here to kiss you at midnight,"He joked.

I looked at John.

"Brian came here to kiss me,"I said,"Can I let him in?"

"Okay, but only if he kisses me too,"John joked.

I let Brian in. He stood with me over by the baby. John looked at us for a second, then pointed at us both.

"I don't like this picture,"He said,"The two of you, a baby."

We recited the countdown to New Year's. At midnight, John and Claire kissed, as did Brian and I. I whispered into Brian's ear.

**1985**

_Tuesday, January 1..._

"I'll meet you at your house,"I whispered,"Wait for me."

He gave a slight nod.

* * *

><p>AND NOW...MAY I PRESENT...A B.J. IN THE MOST ROMANTIC(AND LEAST DESCRIPTIVE) WAY POSSIBLE.<p>

* * *

><p><span>Brian's POV<span>

It was two in the morning. I stared out my window to see Sammy walk onto the porch. She wore a winter coat, which was black, and looked similar to a trench coat or an old fashioned spy jacket. I snuck downstairs and let her in. She snuck with me up to my room. She locked the room behind her and removed her jacket. She kissed me on the lips.

"Sammy,"I asked,"What did you..um..want..exactly?"

She put her finger in her mouth and slowly pulled it out to show what she meant. I stared blankly for a second before it hit me.

"Oh,"I said,"Really?"

"I know you've thought about it,"She said,"You were just too afraid to ask."

"I haven't...,"I started, then saw her look of disbelief,"Okay...I have...but only a little."

She raised an eyebrow.

Sammy's POV

"Okay, a lot,"He said,"Fine...everytime I see you. I'm a pig, I know."

He shivered when I touched his neck.

"You're so sweet,"I said.

I kissed his neck.

"Sure about this,"He asked.

"Yes,"I said,"Brian, I love you, and I respect you. I know you feel the same about me. And I won't lose any of that from you. You won't think DIFFERENTLY of me, will you?"

"Of course not,"He said.

I ran my hands down the sides of his ribs, then his stomach, and stopped at his hips. I slid down his pants. I grabbed the waistband of his boxers and did the same.

"Do you trust me,"I asked.

"Yes,"He said.

I got onto my knees.

"I won't hurt you,"I said.

Claire's POV

I woke up to little John crying. I got up to see what was wrong.

"You got a set of lungs on you,"I told the baby,"You really are John's son."

He needed a diaper change. I got a fresh diaper and changed him into it.

Sammy's POV

After rinsing with mouthwash, I sat on the bed with Brian.

"Was that your first time,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"What about you?"

"Yeah,"He said.

"Did you like it,"I asked.

"Yeah. Did..did you?"

"You know, I actually kind of did."

"Now what do you wanna do,"He asked, holding my hand.

"Brian, you're such a horny toad!"

He let go of my hand and looked down.

"BUT,"I said,"You are MY horny toad."

He laughed.

_Monday, January 7..._

"Ever thought about joining the math club,"Larry asked.

We were walking down the hall to lunch. Christmas break was over, and we were back at school.

"Why...would I want...to do that,"I asked.

"You like math, don't you,"He asked.

"I could take it or leave it."

"Well, you're pretty good at it."

"It's pretty easy."

I sat down at the lunch table. Larry got in line for lunch. I'd brought my own.

"Sammy,"A voice asked.

I turned around. There stood Mike, a childhood friend of John's. He'd moved away at the beginning of my freshman year last year. I stood and hugged him.

"Mikey,"I exclaimed.

He sat next to me at the table.

"What've you been up to,"He asked,"How's John?"

"John's fine,"I said,"He's married. He has a kid."

"Wow. What about you?"

"That's a long story,"I said.

"I've got time,"He said.

"Well, John almost got killed by our father. Our parents were arrested, John got custody of me, I got hit by a car, John's girlfriend was pregnant, so they got married. And, I have a boyfriend now."

"A boyfriend?"

"His name's Brian,"I said.

Larry came back with his tray and sat across from me.

"This guy bothering you, Sammy,"Larry asked.

"No,"I said,"This is Mike, one of John's friends."

"You must be Brian,"Mike said.

"No, this is Larry,"I said,"My friend. Brian's in college."

"College?"

"He's sixteen,"I said.

"Must be some kind of nerd,"He joked.

"You should come visit my house,"I said.

"Sounds good."

"I have to do something first,though."

"What's that?"

"I gotta visit the math club after school."

Larry introduced me to the math club after school. He knew a lot of them from physics club. Mikey came with us.

"Well, I have to go,"Larry said, and left.

A scrawny kid, whose name Larry told me was Jed, walked up to me.

"Samantha Bender,"He asked,"As in, John Bender?"

"You've heard of my brother,"I said.

"Heard of him? He used to steal my lunch."

"Our parents didn't let him eat,"I said.

"Oh,"He said,"What brings you here?"

"Thought I'd join,"I said,"I'm pretty good at math."

Jed nodded.

"What class are you in,"He asked.

"Pre-calc."

As we walked out of the school, I asked Mikey how he would get home.

"I got a car,"He said.

"How old are you?"

"Seventeen."

He took a set of keys out of his pocket and we went to his car. I hopped in the passanger seat.

"Can't believe you joined the math club,"He joked.

"Look, don't tell John, okay,"I said,"Don't need him heckling me about it."

He laughed and nodded in agreement. I directed him to the house. In there, Claire was cradling little Johnny in her arms. She seemed taken aback by the darkly dressed figure who stood by me.

"Claire,"I said,"I'd like to introduce you to Mike, one of John's best friends. Mikey, this is Claire, John's wife. The baby she's holding is John's son, John Junior."

"So, John has a son,"He reflected,"Never thought I'd see the day."

"So where is John,"I asked.

"At work,"Claire said,"He'll be home in a minute."

When John got home, Mikey and John greeted with a hug. John, Mikey, and I sat on the couch to talk. Claire watched little Johnny in the crib, which was moved to John and Claire's room.

"Where've you been, Mike,"John asked.

"My birthmother wanted to take me back,"Mikey said,"So they moved me, all the way back to Springfield. She lived in a damn trailer park, said she'd give me a better life, but.."He chuckled sadly,"I lived with my family for five years, and that BITCH thinks she can just take me away.."

"So, what happened,"I asked.

"She OD'd,"He said,"About a month ago. I got back here, just in time for Christmas."

Mikey was a good guy who'd been dealt a rough hand. His father ran out on him when he was six. He was taken away from his mother (when she went to jail for drug charges) when he was 8. He went to about ten different foster homes between Springfield and Shermer, untill he finally got a break. When he was twelve, he was taken in by a foster family who cared for him.

_Later that night..._

I called Brian to talk. I told him about Mikey.

"That's great,"He said,"Is that the guy who made me do his homework?"

"I think you're confusing him with literally everyone else,"I joked.

"Funny,"He joked.

"There's something else,"I said.

"What?"

"I joined the math club,"I said.

"Terrific."

"But don't tell John."

"Another thing to not tell John."

"Bye Brian, I love you."

"I love you too, Sammy. Bye."

John's POV

I snuck out to the garage again and opened the beer in the mini-fridge. It was a six pack. I drank four. I knew it was a bad habit, but that's just what it was, a habit. I stashed the cans at the bottom of the trash and went inside to see Claire and the baby. **_The baby. I love little Johnny._** I watched him sleep in his crib.

"I just fed him,"Claire said.

I jumped when she spoke. She was right beside me.

"Sorry,"She said,"Didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay,"I said,"I'm almost finished with the book."

She grabbed my hand. I flinched.

"That's great John,"She exclaimed,"What's wrong with you? You're jumpy."

"I'm fine,"I said,"I'm tired. I'm going to go to sleep."

"Okay, John,"She said,and kissed me,"I love you."

"I love you too,"I said.

I lied down in the bed and closed my eyes. _**You don't deserve her, you drunk piece of shit! You're just like your father!**_

Thursday, February 14...

Sammy's POV

Brian visited his father at their new apartment(which they'd gotten at the beginning of February after selling the house) for his birthday. John, Claire, and I went there. We of course brought little Johnny, who was now almost two months old. Brian got presents and cake. After cake, Brian handed me a box of chocolates and flowers.

"Happy Valentines day,"He said.

"I still can't believe your birthday is on Valentines day,"I said.

"Maybe that's why I'm so romantic,"Brian joked.

"SOMEONE is full of themselves,"John said behind us.

_Tuesday, March 5..._

John's POV

I continued writing in my book as Claire was at the store and I watched the baby. I put my pen to the paper, reaching the part where Allison says her signature catchphrase:

* * *

><p><em> "It's unavoidable,"Allison says, looking at everyone and grinning,"When you grow up..your heart dies."<em>

_ "Who cares,"I spat._

_ That was the truth, I didn't care. My heart is already dead. It died years ago._

* * *

><p><em>Monday, March 11...<em>

I'd finished the last paragraph of the book when little John started to cry. It was his feeding time. I held him and fed him as Claire walked in the door.

"Hey John,"She greeted me.

"I finished the story,"I said.

She read the story as I put little John back in his crib.

"What about Monday,"She asked.

"Make them guess,"I joked.

"When do you want it published,"She asked.

"March twenty eighth,"I said.

_Thursday, March 28..._

Turns out Claire knows some people in high places. My story was copyrighted and published by March 28. They were sending us a copy of the book. It was set to be sold in bookstores within a few months.

Sammy's POV

Mikey and I ditched first hour and got detention. Mikey drove me home that day after school. When I got in the house, John was waiting for me. When he looked at me, I saw a crazy, blood-thirsty look in his eyes, like our father had when he was angry.

"You got detention,huh,"He asked.

His smile looked almost devious.

"Yeah,"I answered nervously.

"It's kind of ironic, you know,"He said.

"Wh..why's that,"I asked.

"This was the day I met the Club,"He said.

His laugh sent chills down my spine.

"Where's Claire,"I asked.

"Running some errands,"He said.

_**Fuck. I'm dead. Dead.** _I started for a dead run toward my room.

John's POV

I went to her room and found her hiding under her bed, her eyes closed.

"Sammy,"I said,"What are you doing?"

She opened her eyes.

"How'd you know I was here,"She asked.

"I know all the tricks,"I said,"I taught you...remember?"

She crawled out from under the bed.

"What happened,"I asked.

"I panicked,"She said,"There was this look in your eyes..You looked like, our father for a second."

I helped her up.

"You..remind me of him sometimes,"She said.

"I...remind you of him,"I asked sadly.

"It's not like that,"She said,"It's just how you look. You're better than him, can't you see that, Johnny? You'll NEVER be like him."

Suddenly, a wailing came from my room. I ran to little John's crib, Sammy following. I picked him up.

"Stinky diaper,"She asked.

"Stinky diaper,"I agreed.

I changed the baby's diaper. Sammy laughed when he peed on me.

"You wanna do this?"

"No,"She chuckled.

I threw the dirty diaper away and set the baby back in the crib. I handed him his rattle to play with.

"You're not mad, John,"She asked.

"No,"I said,"How could I be? My book got published!"

"That's great, John,"She exclaimed.

_Saturday, March 30..._

Mike's POV

I was walking to detention, late as usual, when I heard Sammy and Vernon arguing.

"You Benders have been a pain in my ass for too long,"Vernon yelled.

"I told you to leave my brother out of this,"Sammy yelled.

**SMACK!** I ran into the library as Vernon was leaving.

"Nice to see you finally decided to show up,"he said sarcastically.

I ran over to where Sammy stood. She was hunched over, holding her nose.

"What happened?"

"He hit me."

"Come on,"I pulled her arm.

"Where are we going,"She asked.

"We're leaving,"I said.

She followed me out to my car.

"Get in,"I said.

She got into the passenger seat. I handed her a napkin from the cup-holder, which she put under her nose.

Sammy's POV

"Seriously, Mikey,"I said,"Where are we going?"

"You'll see,"He said,"Still bleeding?"

I crumpled up the napkin and threw it out the window.

"No,"I said,"Barely bled at all."

We pulled into a driveway.

"My house,"I asked.

"Yep,"He said.

"John will not be happy about this,"I stated.

He got out of the car and went to knock on the front door. I slouched in the passenger seat when John answered the door. Mike spoke frantically, then he and John came over to where I was. I got out.

"Are you okay,"John asked.

I nodded.

"I told you he had it out for me,"I joked.

John laughed and hugged me. We went inside the house. John let me lay on the couch after he examined my nose.

"Definitely not broken,"He said,"Does it hurt?"

"A little,"I said.

He and Mikey stood behind the couch.

"This is my fault, you know,"John said,"I fucked up, and now you pay the price."

"He's not getting AWAY with this,"Mikey asked.

"No way,"John said,"No one hurts my sister."

_Sunday, March 31..._

Brian visited me at my house.

"So, he hit you,"Brian asked, surprised.

"Yeah,"I said,"John was pissed. So was Claire, and Mikey. They want him fired for this."

"He should be,"Brian said.

"What's wrong Brian,"I asked.

He snuggled closer to me on the couch.

"I've been taking medicine,"He said.

"What kind of medicine?"

"To make me stay awake,"He said,"So I can study more."

"Pep pills,"I exclaimed,"You're taking PEP PILLS! Those are like heroin."

"They're not that bad,"He defended.

"You're always so hard on yourself,"He said,"You HAVE to stop."

He stared intently at me, his eyes like ocean waves. There's a storm in the ocean.

"I don't deserve you,"He said.

"Yes you do,"I said.

He kissed me gently.

"I hope I never lose you,"He said.

"Nobody's home, Bri,"I said,"John and Claire are on a date. The baby's at a sitter's."

"Really,"He asked.

"Yep,"I said.

He smiled.

"I see what you're getting at,"He said slyly.

We started kissing. He grabbed at the sides of my shirt to remove it.

"Wait,"I said.

"What,"He asked.

"We should go to my room,"I said,"Just..in case."

He agreed and followed me to my room. I shut the door. He continued to remove my shirt, then ran his hands down the sides of my hips, slowly undoing my pants. I did the same with him. I felt his warmth as he crawled on top of me. I smiled, I loved the way he felt, the warmth he possessed, the closeness. I loved him with every fiber of my being.

"You're good at this,"I whispered to him.

He reached to the side of the bed for his clothes and begun putting them on. He reached for my clothes and handed them to me.

Brian's POV

Sammy lied on the bed, looking like she was about to cry.

"What's wrong,"I asked,"Did I hurt you?"

She blinked away tears, they fell on her cheeks.

"You didn't hurt me,"She said.

"Then what's wrong,"I asked,"Why are you crying?"

"The last time...I was WITH anyone,"She started,"Was...September."

I sat down by her. I grabbed her hair gently.

"This made you remember them,"I asked.

She shook her head.

"I'm happy, Brian,"She said,"You made me forget."

I touched the noticeable bump on her stomach.

"Promise me you won't throw it away,"I said,"Please."

"Why would I do that,"She asked.

"Just, promise,"I asked.

"All right,"She said,"I promise."

_Wednesday, April 10..._

Sammy was in the hospital. She was having her baby early. John stayed in the room with Sammy. Claire and I were in the waiting room. She was holding John Jr. Sammy wanted for us to keep the birth as secret as possible.

John's POV

"You can do it, Sammy,"I encouraged her.

She screamed as the doctor waited for the baby to come out. I held Sammy's hand tightly. Luckily, she was able to have a natural birth. The doctor grabbed the baby as it came out.

"It's a girl,"The doctor said.

They let Sammy see the baby, then took it to another room to be examined.

"Do you know who's adopting it,"I asked.

"Mikey's parents,"She said.

Mikey's parents, Robert and Angela, came by later to see the baby and talk to Sammy and I. And to fill out papers of course.

"All the papers are done on our end,Sammy,"Angela said,"What about yours?"

"Almost,"Sammy said.

Sammy reached into the pocket of her jacket beside her and pulled out a letter. She handed it to Angela.

"I want her to read this,"Sammy said,"When she's old enough. She needs to know her mother didn't hate her."

Angela nodded.

_Friday, April 19..._

THIRD PERSON POV

Blaine was shocked when he got a letter in jail. His family had cut him off, and he wondered who would possibly mail him. The letter came in a 4x9 inch white envelope and the return address was a dorm at the college. He opened it. Inside was a piece of ruled paper, folded in three. He unfolded it. Inside,attached with a paper clip, was a wallet-sized picture of a baby with red hair. He began reading the letter.

_ Blaine,_

_ This letter in no way means that I forgive you for what you did. I just thought I should tell you. What you did made me pregnant. I had a baby, on Wednesday, April 10th. She was born early, but she's fine. The baby is with her adopted parents. I won't tell you who they are. The name of the baby is printed on the back of the picture. This is all you will ever see of her. _

_ From,_

_ Samantha_

He put the letter back into the envelope and looked at the picture. The back of it said, _Cynthia April 10, 1985._ He knew he deserved this. The baby was HIS daughter, but a baby produced from rape, a permanent reminder of the sick crime he committed.


	36. Xandy, Prom, and Larry's Revenge

Sammy's POV

_Saturday, April 20..._

John and Claire had to go to work, and I was left to take care of little John. Claire and John were nervous to leave me with little John, but they decided they could trust me. It was twelve noon and time for the baby's lunch. I was warming his bottle in the microwave when the doorbell rang. I took out the bottle and set it on the table, then went to answer the door.

"Brian,"I asked.

"Hey Sammy,"Brian said.

"Come in,"I said.

He came in.

"Where's John and Claire,"He asked.

"At work,"I said.

He smirked.

"I'm babysitting, Bri,"I said.

He followed me as I grabbed the bottle from the kitchen, checked it, then went to feed the baby.

"Do you want me to leave,"He asked.

"No, stay here,"I said,"I might need your help."

I sat on John's bed as I fed little Johnny.

"So, you need help,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"Will you bring me my bookbag? It's in my room."

"Yeah, sure,"He said.

I held the baby as he left and came back with my bookbag.

"Will you hold him for a second,"I asked,"He likes to be held after he eats."

I handed him the baby and he held it carefully in his arms. I took my homework out of my bag and started working on it. I looked at Brian, who was gently rocking the now sleeping baby, and thought of how great a father he would make. He looked at me, smiled and made the shh signal, then put the baby in the crib.

Brian's POV

Sammy lowered her head and groaned quietly in frustration. I sat next to her again.

"What's wrong,"I asked quietly.

"I can't get these problems,"She said.

She handed me the paper full of eraser marks and the math book. I looked at the problems.

"Problem five. You forgot to add the Y."

She corrected the problem.

"And number ten,"I said,"You have to square root the denominator, not multiply."

She smacked her forehead with her hand.

"How did I miss that,"She said.

"Common mistake,"I assured her,"I do it all the time, don't worry."

She kissed my nose.

"Anything else, Mr. Smartypants,"She joked.

"Not that I see,"I said,"MRS. Smartypants."

She finished her work and put it back in her bag.

"How's it going with Vernon,"I asked.

"He's being reviewed by the board,"She said,"Apparently, hitting a pregnant girl is a big no-no. No matter who's sister she is."

"That's good."

Sammy's POV

"Hey Bri,"I said,"Are you SURE you've never had a girlfriend?"

"Yeah,"He said,"They spit in my face. Even the nice ones just want to be friends."

"Have you ever kissed anyone? Before me?"

"Not a girl,"He said.

"You kissed a guy?!"

"Yeah. ONCE,"He said,"I was maybe...fifteen. I actually thought I liked guys for a while. It was a one time thing, that's it."

"Who was it?"

"He moved away. We used to be really good friends. He asked me to do it. I didn't like it, that's all there is to it."

Brian's POV

"You're weird, Bri,"She joked.

"Like YOU'VE never kissed a GIRL,"I asked.

"At a party,"She said.

She kissed my cheek.

"Nothing as good as kissing you,"She said.

I smiled. I tilted her chin up and kissed her softly on the lips.

"It's hard to believe,"She said.

"What's that?"

"That you never had a girlfriend,"She said.

"I told you. They spit at me."

"What about in college,"She asked,"Any girls hit on you?"

"A few. But they know I'm taken."

"I can always trust you."

"What about you? Do you flirt with anyone?"

"Larry,"She joked,"We're seeing each other behind your back."

I let out a fake and dramatic gasp. She giggled.

"I..can't handle this...betrayal,"I acted in a dramatic voice,"You...should go!"

"But..I live here,"She acted in the same voice.

"Go...,"I acted,"I...cannot face you any longer!"

She fell back on the bed, laughing hysterically. I laughed with her. We hadn't laughed this hard in a while.

"Did you get taller,"She asked.

"Since when?"

"A few months,"She said,"You're taller than me!"

"We've been dating almost a year,"I said.

"When did we start?"

"Hard to say,"I said.

Sammy's POV

"Remember when you asked me to prom,"I said,"You were so nervous."

"Remember when you kissed me? At the park?"

"Yeah,"I said.

"You ran away before I could say anything,"He said.

I began to blush heavily.

"I thought I ruined our friendship,"I said.

"You did,"He said,"When I met you, I thought 'that girl MUST be taken'. Then, you gave me your number and kissed me on the cheek, and I thought,' this number is fake, she's messing with me. There's no way a girl like that, John Bender's sister, could possibly like a dork like me'."

I laughed.

"I was kicking myself,"I said,"I thought, 'there's no way a smart senior could like me, a stupid freshman'."

"You're not stupid,"He assured me,"You're very smart."

"And YOU are not a dork,"I said.

"Yes I am."

"No,"I said,"You're a sweet, sensitive guy, who has communication problems, and is VERY self-conscious."

"And YOU... are a sweet, caring girl, who is tough as nails, and loyal to the people close to her. And...you're very protective of your brother."

"Sounds about right,"I said.

"Should we check on the baby? He hasn't made a peep since we started being loud."

I got up and checked on little John.

"He's fine,"I said,"Sleeping."

"Through all that?!"

"He can sleep through anything,"I said,"Get's it from John."

Monday, April 22..

I was heading to my second hour class when I saw one of my buddies from math club being stuffed into a locker by two Andy-type jock assholes. I couldn't just walk by and let this happen, so I ran over to them.

"Hey,"I yelled,"What the FUCK are you doing?!"

One of the guys turned to me.

"The hell does it look like? We're shoving this nerd into his locker."

"What's going on here,"Someone asked.

I turned around and saw Mikey.

"They're picking on my friend,"I said.

Mikey grabbed one of them and hurled them to the other side of the hall, where there were more lockers. The other guy let go of Xander, the guy from my math club. Mikey grabbed the guy's shirt and lifted him above the ground.

"Leave this kid alone, asshole,"Mikey said.

Mikey put him down. The two guys left. Xander tried to run off, but Mikey grabbed him and pulled him over by us. Xander was wide-eyed.

"Hey Xander,"I said.

"Hey Sammy,"He said, not taking his eyes off Mikey.

"Got a date for prom yet,"I asked.

"Nope."

"Wanna go with me?"

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure Brian won't mind,"I said.

A look of sadness and suspicion crossed his face.

"For real,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"For real."

"Okay, then. Sure, I'll go."

"Good,"I said,"See you after school."

I went to my second hour class.

Mike's POV

I faced the kid toward me and grabbed him by the shirt.

"Look dork,"I said,"Samantha is my friend. I don't mind if you go to prom with her, but she's got a boyfriend. So keep your hands where they belong, and don't try anything. If you do, I'll snap you like a twig, got it?"

Xander nodded.

"Got it,"He said.

"Good. Now get to class."

Sammy's POV

I called Brian after school.

"There's something I have to tell you,"I said.

"What's that,"Brian asked.

"I'm going to prom with someone,"I said,"Someone that's..not you."

"Larry?"

"No,"I said,"Xander."

"Why,"He scoffed.

"Do I detect a hint of jealousy,"I joked.

"Jealousy?! No!"

"I'm going with him because of what happened this morning,"I said.

I explained what happened.

"I hate when that happens,"He mumbled, then said,"All right. But be careful, that kid's a little weird."

"Weirder than you?"

He chuckled.

"I don't know about that,"He joked,"But really, he's been trashed by girls like you."

"Girls like me?"

"Pretty ones,"He said,"I'm not the only dork who gets his face spit in."

_Saturday, May 4..._

"Sammy, are you sure about this,"John asked as Claire finished my makeup.

"Yeah, I'm sure,"I said as I walked down the hallway.

"I mean going with a dork,"He said,"Two years in a row? Why not a jock? Or..."

"Or a criminal,"I finished as I saw him in the living room.

John was wearing a red flannel shirt, his leather jacket, leather gloves, blue jeans, and hiking boots.

"Why,"I asked, referring to his clothing.

"Gotta make an impression,"He cracked.

I rolled my eyes.

Xander's POV

I got out of the car, driven by my brother Peter, at Sammy's house. I hoped to god this wasn't some cruel trick.

"Will you get in there already,"Peter snapped encouragingly.

I went up and rang the doorbell. A guy answered the door, wearing a leather jacket, gloves and jeans. I gulped. Seeing his face, I recognized him as the infamous John Bender. _**It WAS a trick. Sammy sent me here just to get beat up by her brother. She wouldn't do that, she's my friend. Shut up, loser! You have no friends!**_ I stared blankly at him.

"Are you Xander,"John asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah,"I said.

"John, are you being nice,"Sammy said as she walked up behind him.

John smirked and turned to Sammy.

"Always,"He said.

John kissed Sammy on the head and she stepped outside.

"Behave,"John said, pointing at the both of us.

He closed the door. I looked at Sammy, she was wearing a purple dress that squeezed perfectly against her slim figure. _**Running my hands down the length of her body, feeling her skin, pressing my body against hers...stop it!**_

"Sorry about John,"She said,"He likes to..um..intimidate."

"That's okay,"I said,"You..you look great."

I grabbed her hand and led her to the car.

"Thanks,"She said.

I opened the back door of the car and Sammy got in. I shut the door and got in on the other side. Peter turned to look at Sammy.

"You must be Samantha,"Peter said,"I'm Peter, Xander's older brother."

"Hi,"She said,"People usually call me Sammy."

"Well Sammy,"Peter said as he backed out of the driveway,"I'm glad you're going with him. He's been mopey lately."

"Pete,"I yelled.

"It was no trouble,"She said,"Xander is one of my friends."

_**How her lips moved when she said my name...**_I shook my head clear. Peter pulled into the parking lot of the school around 6:45.

"Pick you up at eleven,"Peter said.

I got out and shut my door, then went over and helped Sammy out of the car. I grabbed her hand gently and led her through the double doors into the school. _**I hope I don't screw this up!**_ Peter drove off in the car. We went into the gym, where there was rock music playing. I was glad it wasn't slow music, not just yet. I could barely handle myself around her. _**I might kiss her. Kiss her, lean her back on the table, raising her dress to reveal her thighs, running my hands up them...knock it off!**_ I was ashamed at the sick thoughts that ran through my head. _**You're sick! That's sick! She's your friend, she trusts you!**_ I found myself staring into her eyes. When she noticed, she smiled.

"Do...uh..do you want a drink,"I asked.

"Sure,"She said.

"Like what?"

"Punch is fine,"She said.

I went over to the drinks table and poured two cups of punch. I was glad to be out of her sight for just a moment. Long enough for my imagination to get hold of itself. It was hard not to be mesmerized by her. _**Her brown eyes, long, brown hair.**_

"Hey dork,"Someone said.

I set the drinks down. I wasn't about to have the contents poured on me. I looked for the person that said that. It was none other than Sammy's friend.

"Mike,"I asked.

"Where's Sammy,"He asked.

"Over by the corner,"I said,"I was just getting us drinks."

He followed me, his punch in hand, over to Sammy.

"Mikey,"Sammy exclaimed,"What are you doing here?"

"I was bored,"He said,"Someone spiked the punch."

"Did YOU spike the punch Mikey,"She asked.

"I'll never tell,"Mike said slyly.

8:00 p.m.-

I couldn't begin to count the dreams I'd had about Samantha, the fantasies, sick ones at that. _**The things I'd do to her, things I'd do with her.**_I kept remembering these as she held me closely for a slow dance. At the end of the dance, she hugged me, tightly, and then I knew. I knew she felt the tightness in my pants as much as I did. I knew because she pulled away from me with a confused look on her face. I looked away from her, waiting to be humiliated in front of everyone, waiting for Mike to come over and kick my ass for being such a huge perv.

"I...I.."I stuttered, but no words came out.

"Xandy..."She questioned, using her nickname for me.

I closed my eyes and prepared for the worst.

"What's wrong,"She asked.

I still couldn't talk. I looked at her one more time, then ran out the door, out to the field, and sat under the bleachers.

Sammy's POV

8:30 P. M.

Mikey and I looked all over for Xander. He must've thought I was mad at him for what happened. I wasn't mad, just surprised. He looked humiliated, just ran out before I could say anything to him. We found him under the bleachers, sitting by himself. I went over by him, Mikey following close behind.

"We've been looking all over for you,"I told him.

"To kick my ass,"He asked jokingly.

I laughed and sat by him.

"No,"I said,"To talk to you. I'm not angry. In fact, I probably shouldn't have gotten so close to you."

Xander laughed.

"Here's the thing,"He said,"I like you, a lot."

"I like you too,"I said.

"No, I mean..I have a crush on you,"He said,"A really, really big crush on you."

"That's so sweet,"I said,"No one's ever had a crush on me before. Except Brian."

"I'm sure most of the guys in math club are in love with you,"He joked.

Mikey sat down next to me, so that I was in-between the two of them. Mikey took out his weed stash, and rolled a joint, then lit it with his lighter. He took a long drag off it, then passed it to me. I took a long smooth drag, relaxed, then blew out the smoke. Mikey was smirking at me.

"What,"I asked,"You think I'd live with John Bender for sixteen years and NEVER try weed?"

I passed the joint to Xander, who shook his head.

"Come on,"I said,"It won't bite."

He sighed and took it. He held it to his lips, sucked in, then coughed up smoke, and gave it back to me. Mikey laughed.

"Be careful,"I laughed.

9:00

"How long have we been out here,"Xander asked.

I was lying down on the grass.

"No idea,"I said.

"Sammy,"Xander said.

"Yeah, Xandy,"I asked.

"I'm glad you went to prom with me,"He said,"It's better than what I had planned."

"What's that?"

"A lot of things have been going wrong for me,"He said,"At home, at school. And when you invited me to prom, I thought it was some sort of cruel trick. If it was, well, that was the final straw."

"What do you mean,"Mikey asked.

"I wrote a note,"Xander said,"Saying goodbye..to everyone..I was going to..sneak out of the house..find the bridge at the end of town...and jump."

I sat up and put my arm around him.

"What would you wanna do a thing like that for,"Mikey said.

"I'd be better off dead,"Xander said.

"Don't say that,"I said.

Tears fell from Xander's eyes.

"I'll be lucky to find a girl HALF as beautiful or kind as you,"Xander said,"But..let's face it. I don't have anything a girl could want."

"You're very nice,"I said,"And cute. And you have a really unique name. Any girl who doesn't see that, is really missing out."

His face brightened.

"Really,"He asked.

"Absolutely,"I said,"If I wasn't already committed to Brian, I would love someone like you as a boyfriend."

I grabbed his chin and kissed him gently on the lips. Xander and Mikey both went wide-eyed.

Claire's POV

I put little John in his crib for the night, then went to look for regular sized John. I found him in the garage, drinking from a can of beer.

"John,"I asked.

He crushed the can and threw it away. He came over towards me. Still wearing his leather jacket and gloves, he looked intimidating. I saw the tears in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Claire,"He said.

"John, I don't care about the drinking,"I pleaded,"Just, please, tell me what's wrong with you."

He didn't say anything, just blinked back tears. I tried a different approach.

"How long have you been bottling up your emotions,"I asked.

"As long as I can remember,"He said.

"That's bad for you,"I said,"Really bad. Maybe you should get some help."

"If I do that, they'll take Sammy away,"He said.

"No, they won't,"I said,"Only if you're dangerous. And I know you, you'd never hurt Sammy."

He nodded.

"Okay,"He said,"I'll think about it. But Claire?"

"Yeah?"

"If they do take Sammy away,"He started,"Promise me you'll adopt her. I don't want her to get taken by some stranger, where she could be hurt again."

"That won't happen, John."

"Just...please. Promise."

"Okay,"I said,"I promise."

He was still holding back tears.

"Just tell me,"He said,"Tell me I've become my father."

"No. Never."

I followed him as he walked into our bedroom, where the baby was. He reached down and gently stroked the baby's cheek. He smiled as I stood by him.

"If I ever hurt you,"He said,"Or the baby, then I want you to leave. Get as far away as possible."

I wanted to argue, tell him he wouldn't hurt anyone, but I saw he was too distraught to listen.

"Okay,"I said.

He sat on the bed, buried his head in his hands, and cried. I sat by him.

"John, I can't begin to know what happened to you and Sammy,"I said,"But please, talk to me."

He looked up at me, teary-eyed.

"Do you know what it's like,"He asked,"To think everyone hates your guts? Like the whole world is caving in on you?"

I nodded.

"It's my fault, you know,"He said,"I let Sammy get raped. More than once. She had a baby, and it's all my fault."

"You didn't know,"I assured him.

He chuckled, then stared deeply into my eyes. There was rage on his face, like he could kill me, but he didn't move.

"Remember last year,"He asked,"At detention? When Andy said I didn't matter..he was right."

"You do matter,"I said,"To me. And to Sammy, and the baby. And your friends."

"I keep thinking that I deserved it,"He said.

"Deserved what?"

"What my parents did,"He said,"Beating me. Sammy didn't deserve it, she didn't deserve any of it, but I did."

"The baby, little John loves you,"I said,"His face brightens when he sees you. He smiles. He loves you, John."

"I love him too. I hope he knows that."

"He does,"I assured him,"In his tiny little heart, he knows it."

10:00 p.m.-

Sammy's POV

"Geez Mikey,"I exclaimed jokingly,"How many of those do you have?!"

Mikey pulled out another joint and lit it.

"About ten,"Mikey joked,"More or less."

Xander began laughing hysterically, nearly dropping his joint on the ground.

"How many have YOU had,"I asked him.

"About ten,"Xander said,"More or less."

I smirked at him, taking a drag off mine.

"Hey,"I whispered,"Wanna hear a secret?"

"What,"Xander asked.

"I was pregnant once,"I whispered.

"What,"Xander repeated.

"Mikey...can tell you,"I said.

Xander's POV

"I'm not supposed to tell, Sammy,"Mike said.

"Wanna know why they call me a slut,"She asked.

"Umm..,"I said.

"There was a rumor,"She said,"That I fucked some college guys."

"Sammy, I don't think you should...,"Mike started.

She looked into my eyes. She was smiling, giggling, but her eyes had a pained expression.

"I didn't fuck them,"She said,"They fucked me, not that I had a choice in the matter."

"You mean.."

She nodded.

"Yeah,"She said,"My fault really, should've known that bastard was watching me."

She hung her head and started to cry. I put my arm around her shoulder in a friendly manner, and she leaned on my shoulder.

"Wanna go back inside,"Mike asked.

Sammy sat up and wiped her tears. I stood up then helped her up.

"Let's go,"Sammy said.

11:00-

I held Sammy's hand as we waited outside for Peter to pick us up.

"Th..thank you Sammy,"I said,"For..for being my friend."

"Xander, you're a great guy,"She said,"I'm glad to be your friend."

"Thanks,"I said.

Peter picked us up and drove to Sammy's house. I helped Sammy out and walked her to the front door.

"Promise me you won't do anything stupid,"She said,"I'd BETTER see you at school on Monday."

She smiled and kissed my cheek. I smiled.

"I promise,"I said.

I went back into the car and got into the passenger seat.

"How was it,"Peter asked.

"Terrific,"I said.

"Do you like her,"He asked.

"She has a boyfriend,"I said,"We're just friends."

_Saturday, May 11..._

John's POV

I went with Claire and Sammy to see a psychologist. They sat in the waiting room while I went in to see a Mrs. Smith. I told her about my parents, about Sammy, Claire, and the baby.

"I didn't tell anyone,"I said,"About how I felt, what I was going through. I didn't think anyone cared. I thought everyone hated me, Sammy, Claire, my friends, everyone. Claire wanted me to get help. I didn't want to, not at first."

"Why didn't you want help, John,"She asked.

"I thought..that Sammy would get taken away from me,"I said.

Sammy's POV

I was worried about John.

"Do you think he'll be okay,"I asked.

"I think so,"Claire said,"I hope."

John came into the waiting room later.

"What happened,"I asked.

"She said I'm depressed,"John said,"They're giving me pills. I..I still get to keep you Sammy."

"I'm glad you're okay,"I said.

I called Brian when we got home.

"How is he,"Brian asked, concerned.

"He has depression,"I said,"He's getting medicine. I think he'll be okay. Don't tell anyone, not just yet."

"I won't,"He said,"So..been kissing anyone lately?"

"Not this week,"I joked.

"Geez,"He joked,"First Larry, now Xander. How many nerds are you gonna kiss?"

"Brian, you know you're my prince,"I said.

"Yeah,"He said,"See you Sammy."

"Bye Brian,"I said.

I hung up. I went to John, who was in his room with Claire, who was holding the baby.

"Hey Johnny,"I said.

John looked up and smiled at me.

"Come here, Sammy,"He said.

He scooted over so I could sit between him and Claire. He put his arm around me and kissed my cheek.

"I love you, Sammy,"He said.

"You too, John,"I said.

He looked at me sadly. I knew what was bothering him, I could read my brother like a book. I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"You have to forgive yourself,"I said,"What happened to me...wasn't your fault."

"You got pregnant,"He remarked sadly,"Because of ME."

"You didn't know,"I said,"You couldn't have. I don't blame you."

"You don't?"

"No,"I said,"John, you blame yourself for everything. What our parents did, to you and to me, it wasn't our fault."

"You and I both know I deserved what they did,"He said.

"No. You didn't,"I said,"You're innocent, too. I wish you could see that."

"You're a good man, John,"Claire defended,"And I know you're afraid of being hurt. I won't hurt you, you know that."

"Neither will I," I said.

"You have to let us in,"Claire said.

He reached past me and around Claire's shoulder, pulling us into a sort of sideways group hug.

"It feels good to have a real family,"He said,"For once."

It IS nice to have a family for once.

_Monday, May 20..._

I waited at the lunch table for Mikey, Xander, and Larry. Mikey sat next to me first, then Larry, Xandy and a skinny girl with red hair who I didn't know sat across from me.

"You met a girl, Xandy,"I asked.

"Well, I've known her for a while,"Xandy said,"She's my lab partner in physics. I just, never, umm, thought she liked me, untill now."

The girl sighed in fake annoyance at Xandy's shyness.

"Hi,"She said,"I'm Ashley Oswin."

I flinched at the name. I looked at Mikey, who grabbed my hand comfortingly. Mikey knew the names of the guys, and the one who I'm sure was the father, Blaine Oswin.

"Hi,"I said back,"I'm Samantha Bender."

Ashley's eyes widened. She gasped.

"You're the girl,"Ashley said,"The one that...that my brother.."

"Raped,"I finished quietly.

She nodded. I leaned my head on Mikey's shoulder as the memories of that day flowed back.

"I can go,"She said,"If I'm making you uncomfortable, I'll leave."

"No, it's okay,"I said,"Just, the name, it brought back memories."

Ashley's POV

I watched guiltily as Sammy cried softly. 'Sammy the Slut', as some, rather mean, people called her. I'd been at the trial, listened to everyone speak. I'd visited Blaine in jail, though my parents, and even Blaine himself told me not to. He'd shown me the picture of the baby, his child, Cynthia.

I was ashamed that my brother, usually so sweet, could even think to do that to someone. I'd seen Samantha around school, but was too afraid to talk to her. She wiped her tears and regained her composure.

Sammy's POV

"So anyway,"I said,"John's birthday is today. Claire's having a small party, and I want you guys to come. It's at my house, today after school. You can come too, Ashley..if you'd like."

"Sure,"Ashley replied.

After school, Xandy approached me at my locker.

"Sammy, I didn't know Ashley was that guy's brother,"He said,"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Xandy,"I said,"You deserve her."

"When I read in the paper last year,"He said quietly,"About those guys, who raped that young girl. That..was you?"

I nodded.

"I don't like to talk about it,"I said,"The..the one who planned it...was my ex boyfriend. He'd been stalking me."

"Well Sammy,"He said,"I have to go. See you at the party."

"Bye Xandy,"I said.

I met up with Mikey down the hall and we went out to his car.

"H..how's Cynthia,"I asked.

That question had been burning at me all day.

"Cynthia is great,"He said,"Eating, sleeping, pooping. You know, baby stuff."

"Good,"I said.

"My parents said you could come see her,"He said,"If you wanted to."

"Okay,"I said.

When Mikey and I got to my house, Claire and John were waiting in the kitchen, where the cake was. John answered the door later when Xander, Larry, and Ashley showed up.

"Who invited the nerds,"John joked,"And uh..the redhead?"

"I did, Johnny,"I said,"Do you have a...PROBLEM with that?"

Larry, Xander, Ashley, Mikey and I sat together on the couch and ate cake.

"So Xandy,"I started,"How long have you and..Ashley been dating."

"Uh..today,"Xandy said,"I didn't have the courage to ask her out."

"All year,"Ashley said,"He's liked me all year, and never bothered telling me."

"Maybe he should've asked you to prom,"I joked.

"Yeah,"Ashley said,"I was going to ask about it, but then I found out he was going with you. I actually thought you two were dating."

"I wasn't ready for the rejection,"Xandy said,"The whole,'Why would I want to go out with a loser like you?!',rejection that I get from most girls."

"So I asked if he was dating anyone,"Ashley said,"And he said no. So I told him I liked him. He said he liked me too. Then I asked if he wanted to date me, and he said yes."

"When did this happen,"I asked.

"Second hour,"Xandy said,"Physics."

_Friday, May 31..._

It was the last day of school. I went to my first hour class, English. Larry was already there.

"Hey Sammy,"He said.

"Hey Larry,"I said.

"Is um, is Andy home from college yet,"He asked.

"He got home last night,"I said.

He nodded. I looked at him for a second, then smiled.

"You're gonna kick his ass,"I said,"Aren't you?"

He flexed his muscles.

"Think I could?"

Andy's POV

I lied on the couch in the living room of my parent's house, watching tv. It was about three thirty, and John wanted me to visit thier house at four, after he got off from work. I turned off the tv as the doorbell rang. I went to answer it.

"Who the hell are.."I started,"..Larry?!"

I stared in shock at the guy who stood in front of me. The kid that was once hairy, pale and very small, was now tan, tall, and muscular. Easily three times the size he was when I saw him last.

"Yeah, it's me,"He said,"Hey Andy."

"Uh...come in,"I said.

I let him in and shut the door behind him.

"So, what did you want,"I asked.

He cracked his knuckles.

"Honestly, Andy,"He said,"I came here for a little payback."

"What are you..."

He screamed and ran toward me, tackling me to the floor. I landed so hard on my back that it knocked the wind out of me. He punched me in my stomach, my chest and my head. He had me pinned to the floor, his fist raised high in the air, about to punch my face, maybe break my jaw. I closed my eyes as his fist swung near my face.

"All right, Larry,"Someone said,"I think he gets the point."

I opened my eyes. Larry got off of me and went to stand near..

"Allison,"I asked.

Sammy came in from the kitchen a second later, laughing hysterically.

"Did you get all buffed up just so you could do this,"I asked.

"No,"Larry said,"I had a growth spurt, over summer. I worked out a little, so shithead jocks don't beat me up again. I came here to fuck with you."

Larry laughed.

"Had you scared, didn't he,"Sammy said.

I scoffed.

"I was not SCARED,"I said.

I realized that he didn't hit me hard enough to bruise, or even hurt that much.

"You weren't even TRYING,"I said,"Come here."

"I'd rather not,"Larry said.

I walked over to him and grabbed his arm. I curled his hand into a fist.

"Hit me,"I said,"Punch me. Right in the jaw."

He stepped back a little, shaking his head.

"No,"He said.

"Don't be scared,"I said,"Hit me. Come on, you know I deserve it. And I KNOW you want to. So do it."

Larry's POV

I sighed and curled up my fist. _**Finally, a chance to get back at the guy who humiliated me.**_ I tightened the muscles in my arm and swung back. I punched him right in the cheek. He turned his head, then held his mouth for a second. I pulled my hand back, shaking. There was a confused look in his eyes, then he pulled his hand away from his mouth, revealing a bloody tooth. The three of us gasped.

"Andy...I.."I stumbled.

Andy chuckled.

"My last baby tooth,"He said slowly,"Been waiting for this thing to come loose."

He left for a minute then came back.

"Sorry,"I said.

"It's okay,"Andy said, patting my back,"You're not still scared of me, are you?"

"No,"I said,"Why would I be? I mean, you only beat me up once."

"You're pretty strong,"He said,"Maybe stronger than me."

"That's why I made him my bodyguard,"Sammy said.

"Seriously, Andy,"I said,"Are you okay?"

Andy's POV

"Yeah, I'll be okay,"I said.

"Are you guys ready to go to my house,"Sammy asked,"I'm driving."

"In that case,"I joked,"I think I'll walk."

Sammy laughed and grabbed keys out of her pocket.

"Coming, Larry,"She asked.

John's POV

Sammy came home in the car, bringing Andy, Allison, and Larry with her.

"What is this, a 'Bring the Nerd you beat up in high school' party,"I teased her,"Huh, Sammy? Cause if it is, there's a lot of other nerds I can call."

"That reminds me,"Sammy joked,"Where's my nerd?"

"Brian is in the bathroom,"I said.

Sammy's POV

I waited for Brian to get out of the bathroom, then hugged him tightly.

"Woah,"Brian said,"Oh, hey Sammy."

"Brian,"I said,"You're home for vacation!"

"Yeah,"He said.

I sat down at the kitchen table with him.

"I need to talk to you,"He said.

I looked at his face, into his eyes. The storm is back, and it's bigger than ever. Tears choked up my throat and I couldn't hold back the thought that dug at my mind. He grabbed my hand. I knew it would happen eventually. I had to face the inevitable.

"Y..you found someone else,"I said.

He stared at me for a second, then shook his head swiftly.

"NO,"He darted,"I just..need to tell you."

"What?"

"You were right about the pills,"He said,"My roommate found them. He flushed them down the toilet, after my seizure."

"What happened,"I asked.

"It wasn't exactly a seizure,"He said,"Dan found me passed out on the floor, foaming spit. I took a whole bottle of those damn things. It was too much, he thought I was dead. He thought I did it for suicide. It..it was an accident."

"When?"

"About a week ago,"He said.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You would've worried,"He said.

"Well, of course I would have!"

He put his hand behind my neck.

"You didn't REALLY think I'd break up with you,"He asked.

"I..yeah,"I said.

"No, Sammy,"He said,"I want to be with you..forever."

"Me too,"I said.


	37. Summer of '85: Brian's Dilemma

_Saturday, June 1.._

Brian and John insisted that I go with the Breakfast Club to the Pizza Place for lunch. I rode with Claire and John. They dropped off little John with Mikey to babysit. We met Andy and Allison at the Place. Claire and John sat across from them at the booth. Brian got there later and sat across from me.

"So everyone's here,"John said,"Who wants to order?"

"I'll do it,"Andy said, and passed us menus.

"I'll have cheese,"I said,"And a root beer float."

"I'll take cheese too,"John said,"And Pepsi."

"Pepperoni,"Brian said,"And orange soda."

"I'll have water,"Claire said.

"That's IT,"John asked, surprised.

"Salad,"Claire said.

"Okay,"Andy said,"Allison?"

"I'll have what you're having,"Allison said.

"All right,"Andy said,"So that's one pepperoni pizza, one cheese, one anchovie and onion, and a salad. For drinks, a root beer float, three Pepsi's, an orange soda, and water."

Andy gave the waiter the order. We got our drinks first, then our pizzas.

John's POV

I watched as Claire poked at her salad, barely eating at all.

"Claire, do you want pizza,"I asked, holding out a slice for her.

"No thanks, John,"She said.

After we ate, we sat and talked for a while.

After we left, I dropped Brian and Sammy off at Brian's father's apartment. When Claire and I got home, Claire went into the bathroom. I stood outside the bathroom and thought I heard her crying. I knocked on the door.

"Claire, what's wrong with you,"I asked.

I opened the door, Claire stood in front of the mirror, shirtless, looking at her reflection.

"Nothing's wrong, Johnny,"She said.

"You haven't eaten all day,"I said,"How come?"

"Look at me, John,"She said.

I looked at her, and smiled.

"What are you worried about,"I asked.

"We haven't really fooled around,"She said,"Since the baby was born. And I know there hasn't been much time, but.."

"But?"

"But I thought,"She started,"I just had this feeling..that you don't find me attractive anymore."

I put my hands on her hips.

"Of course I do,"I said.

"You do?"

Claire's POV

"Yeah,"John said,"In fact, my pants are becoming a little tight. And I KNOW they're not shrinking."

I slipped off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. I traced my finger against the scars on his shoulder.

"You're the only girl I ever let do that,"He said.

"Do what,"I asked.

"Touch me,"He said,"My scars."

Sammy's POV

"I thought you said your dad was here,"I said.

"I lied,"Brian admitted.

"Are you planning something,"I asked.

He touched my knee and ran his hand slowly up my thigh.

"Maybe,"He said slyly.

He unzipped his pants and leaned on top of me.

"Brian, wait,"I said.

He stopped and backed off me.

"Yeah,"He asked.

"If..if I say no..?"

"Then it's no,"He said,"You don't have to. Just say the word, and I'll stop. We can watch a movie or something. I didn't even ask you.."

He put his head in his hands.

"Don't feel bad, Brian,"I said,"I just..wanted to hear you say it, that's all."

I put my hand on his leg.

"My dad doesn't get home untill about seven,"He said,"It's only two-o-clock."

"What do you wanna do,"I asked playfully.

"Well, I was reading this book,"He said,"At the college library. About types of sex. And..um, remember what you did with me last January? New Year's?"

I smirked.

"Yeah."

"Well, I read about doing that with a girl,"He said,"And of course, I thought of you. And how to repay you for that. And um..kinda sounds fun."

"Girls can get that?!"

"Yeah,"He said,"It's uh..mostly tongue. Do..do you want to?"

"Sure, why not?"

* * *

><p><strong>YOU CAN SKIP THIS MILDLY DESCRIPTIVE SEX SCENE IF YOU'D LIKE. IT DOESN'T THE STORY IF YOU DON'T READ THE PART, IT JUST HELPS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.<strong>

* * *

><p>I smiled and let him lead me to his room. I sat down on the bed. He locked the bedroom door, then walked over to me. He hesitantly reached for my pants and grabbed the belt loops. He took my giggling as an invitation to keep going and remove my pants. He then removed my underwear and put them aside.<p>

"Lay down,"He said softly,"Relax your muscles."

I lied back on the bed, my knees on the end, and my feet touching the floor. He put his hands on the insides of my thighs. He took a deep breath in, exhaled, then pushed my thighs apart gently. I felt his head go between my legs. I shuddered when I felt his tongue graze against, what I knew was, the most sensitive area on a girl's body. It felt amazing, but weird and slimy at the same time. I grabbed the blanket on the bed tightly with my fists as he massaged the part with his tongue. I started moaning, involuntarily. I was taking short, sharp breaths. If he kept going, I would die. He pushed harder and twisted his tongue around. He pulled his head up and breathed heavily.

"Sammy.."He said, catching his breath.

"Do it,"I said,"Do whatever you want to me, Brian."

He removed his clothes and climbed on me, removing my shirt, and pushing me all the way onto the bed. I squeaked when he pushed himself quickly into me. He had one hand by my legs, his finger gently rubbing the spot his tongue was just massaging. His other hand was behind my back, unhooking my bra and throwing it off of me. I was grabbing his hair with one hand, my other hand wrapped around his back.

"Harder,"I mumbled.

He pushed in as hard as he could.

"Brian.."I groaned.

* * *

><p><strong>MILDLY GRAPHIC SEX SCENE ENDS HERE. <strong>

* * *

><p>I lied down on Brian's bed,not yet dressed, and feeling completely euphoric, as Brian went to the bathroom to clean up. When he came back, he was wearing boxers.<p>

"You okay,"He asked.

"A little cold,"I said,"But, yeah."

He pulled back the large cover and we both crawled beneath it. I snuggled close to him.

"Ever done THAT before, Brian,"I asked jokingly.

"No,"He said,"And I take it that you liked it?"

"Yeah,"I said,"Did you?"

"Yeah, I did,"He said.

He put his arms around me when I started to shiver. I could hear his heart beating.

"I love that sound,"I said.

"What sound,"He asked.

"The sound of your heartbeat,"I said,"Like in the hospital, when you layed in the bed with me. I felt safe, secure, like nothing could touch me."

He put his ear close to my chest and listened.

"I can hear yours too,"He said,"It's pleasant."

I turned to face the other direction and he put his arms around me, scooting me close, effectively spooning with me. He kissed the back of my head.

Brian's POV

"BRIAN RALPH JOHNSON,"Someone shouted.

I opened my eyes to see that my father was in the room. I forgot to lock the door! Sammy woke up, saw my father, then hid below the cover.

"Get up and get dressed,"He demanded,"We'll give this girl some privacy."

I put on my shirt and pants, set Sammy's clothes on the bed, then followed him out of the room. He shut the door. His face was red with anger.

"Just what the HELL were YOU..,"He yelled, then said,"If that's not Samantha in there, then you should be ashamed. Your mother and I taught you never to cheat, Brian, and that includes.."

"Relationships,"I finished,"I know. And it is Samantha."

"What did I tell you about being home alone with a girl,"He asked.

I thought for a minute, trying to remember if there even was such a rule. I raised my eyebrows and shrugged when my mind went blank.

"Nothing,"I said,"I don't think you set rules for girls."

"Well..I guess I can't technically ground you,"He said,"Since you didn't break a rule. But I'll be watching you. And from now on, I don't want you being alone with Samantha, or any other girl."

I nodded.

"There IS no other girl,"I said.

"What?"

"Dad, I'm in love with her,"I said,"I've never felt this way before."

"I understand that, Brian,"He said,"Believe me, I do. But I also understand how much trouble two teenagers can get into when they're not careful. Did...did you use protection?"

"Yes,"I said.

"Have we had the TALK yet?"

"No."

"I guess..at this point...you don't really NEED it,"He said lightly.

Sammy came out out and stood beside me. I brushed her hair out of her face.

"Should I walk home,"She asked, looking down.

"I'll call John,"He said.

He went to call John, returning moments later.

"John will be here in a few minutes,"He said.

Sammy nodded. She looked at me, almost crying.

"John might not let me see you anymore, Brian,"She said.

I hugged her and rubbed her back.

"It's gonna be okay,"I assured her,"We'll make this work."

Sammy's POV

"Bye, Brian,"I said.

I went outside and waited for John to show up. When he got there, I hopped in the car and shut the door. He looked rather upset.

"John..."I said.

He slammed his fists on the dashboard. I flinched and looked away, letting my hair fall to cover my face.

"You were alone with Brian, huh,"He asked.

I nodded, still not looking at him. I was crying again, and for some reason, I didn't want him to see me crying.

"What happened,"He asked.

"I think you know what happened,"I said.

"No, no,"He said,"I mean what the hell did he do? To make you cry like that. Tell me. Did he dump you? Hit you?"

"You and I both know that Brian wouldn't do anything to hurt me,"I said,"But, if you MUST know, he did this thing with his tongue.."

"Okay, enough,"He interrupted,"Spare me the details. But tell me why you're crying."

"I'm crying because I thought you'd never let me see him again,"I said.

"I could tell you not to see him,"He said,"Then ground you, lock you in your room, put unbendable iron bars on the windows, and weld the door shut, and you would STILL find a way to see him."

"I'm in love with him,"I said,"We're in love, like you and Claire."

He put his hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him.

"I just don't want you getting hurt again,"He said.

"Brian's not like Nick,"I said.

"I know."

"He's not like Sandra either."

There was a look of hurt on his face. Sandra was a girl he'd dated a few years ago. They were in love, even wanted to get married. They'd dated for almost a year. He shared everything with her, spilled his heart out to her. Then she dumped him, in front of his friends. His heart was shattered.

"John, I'm sorry,"I darted,"I didn't mean to bring her up."

He backed the car out of the parking lot and drove onto the road.

"It's okay,"He said,"But Sammy?"

"What?"

"If Brian ever hurts you,"He said,"Tell me. If he does something, or even just says something, because you and I both know those hurt, then tell me. Don't be afraid, even if he threatens you. I'll keep you safe."

I nodded.

"Okay, I will,"I said.

John's POV

The memories of Sandra came flowing back again. I was about sixteen, Sammy's age, and she was seventeen. Long blonde hair, tall slender body. I told her everything about me, and I knew everything about her. She was the first girl I really opened up to. We even promised to get married when we were old enough. _**I took her virginity, for god's sakes!**_Then she dumped me, embarrassed me in front of my friends. I thought she was joking at first, then I found out she wasn't. I was crushed. I cried over her, Sammy tried to comfort me. I never opened up to another girl after her, until Claire. _**I can barely open up to her.**_

_Monday, June 3..._

Allison's POV

I'd let my hair grow out since last summer. It was past my shoulders now. Andy came up and stood behind me as I looked in the bathroom mirror. His hair had gotten longer too, and his skin a little more tan. He wrapped his arms securely around me. I got chills when he kissed my neck. I turned toward him and put my hands on his hips.

"Are your parents home,"I asked.

"No,"He said,"We're all alone."

He put his hand on my hip and slid it up my shirt a little. I followed his lead up to his bedroom, where he closed the door and leaned me against the bed. He undid his pants, then mine, kissing me at the same time. After reaching his hand up to unhook my bra, he stopped.

"All right, what's the matter,"He insisted.

"Nothing's the matter,"I lied.

Andy's POV

I raised my eyebrows and looked at her skeptically. She sat up and put her head down, her hair covering her face. She was sniffling.

"What happened,"I asked.

"Honestly,"She said,"I don't really know."

"Tell me,"I said.

"I had a roommate in my dorm,"She started,"Her name was Lisa, a sophomore. She was nice. She had a boyfriend, Matt, a senior. He was nice, I thought."

Allison's POV

**Flashback...**

**Lisa went to get groceries at the store near the college. I sat on the couch in the living room untill someone knocked at the door. I went to answer it. It was Matt. **

**"Is Lisa here,"He asked.**

**"No,"I said,"She's at the store. She'll be back soon. Uh..come in."**

**I let him in.**

**"What's new Alli,"He asked.**

**"I'm working on this project,"I said,"It's almost finished. Wanna see it?"**

**"Sure,"He said.**

**"It's in my room"I said,"Come on."**

**I led him to my room to show him the project I was working on; multiple tiny pictures, that formed a large picture. I pulled the project out of my bag and showed it to him.**

**"Wow, that's great,"He said.**

**"Thanks,"I said.**

**I put the project back in my bag, and when I turned to face the door, it was shut. I noticed it was locked and tried to unlock it. That's when he grabbed me, turned me around and kissed me. He forced his tongue into my mouth, nearly into my throat. I tried to leave, but he wouldn't let go. Before I could get over the shock of what just happened, he threw me onto my bed. I watched in horror as he pulled off his clothes and climbed on top of me. He pulled down my pants, which came off easily, as they were PJ's. I lied there, frozen as he pushed his naked body onto me. He started pulling off my panties, when there was a knock at the door. **

**"Shit,"He muttered.**

**He got off of me and got dressed, then went to answer the door. It was one of Lisa's classmates who unknowingly saved me, returning the book she borrowed. Matt left before Lisa got back. I didn't move from the bed. Lisa asked me later that night if anything was wrong. I didn't tell her that Matt visited. I told her I was just tired, and needed sleep.**

_Present..._

"That's horrible,"Andy said.

He held my hands.

Andy's POV

"I didn't fight back,"She said,"I didn't even move."

She was crying, hiding her face with her hair. I held her in my arms as she shuddered.

"I shouldn't have let him in,"She said.

"When did this happen?"

"Last month,"She answered.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was scared,"She said,"And confused. I didn't think anyone would believe me. Andy..he was..going to..."

_Tuesday, June 18..._

Sammy's POV

I went with Mikey to the park that Brian and I had our first date. We sat at a picnic table, and he pulled out two joints and handed me one.

"Mikey, you got a match,"I asked.

"Yeah."

He took out a matchbox and handed me a match.

"Watch this,"I said.

I put the match behind my front teeth and lit it like John taught me. I lit my joint, then his, and put out the match.

"Wow,"He said,"Did John teach you that?"

"Yeah."

"Cool trick,"Someone said.

I looked to see Brian, who sat by me. I handed him my joint to share.

"Mikey,"I said,"This is my boyfriend Brian."

"I see,"Mikey said.

I didn't realize that Brian was kissing my neck. I pushed him away. He laughed and leaned on me. I pushed him away again.

"Brian, knock it off,"I said.

He settled for putting his arm around me.

"I can't help it,"He joked,"You're just so pretty."

"Is he bothering you,"Mikey asked,"'Cause I can kick his ass if you'd like."

"No, he's fine,"I said.

"Tell me about Nick,"Brian said.

"You already know,"I said.

"I mean..where'd you meet him,"He said,"Just...why?"

I took a long drag off my joint.

"I met him when I was still in junior high,"I said,"Fourteen. He was cute, really nice, for a while. We dated for two or three months, then he asked me to sleep with him. I told him no, but he kept asking. Every day. But he eventually gave up, I thought. He invited me out to dinner, at this nice restaurant. When I got to his house, he asked me to do it. I told him I wasn't ready. He called me a bitch for holding out, and said I owed him for taking me on the date. He started unzipping his pants and climbing on me. I didn't want that happening again, so I punched him in the nuts. While he was distracted, I ran off."

"John would be proud,"Mikey said.

"I'll kick his ass,"Brian said, in the funny voice John had told me about.

"He's in jail,"I said.

"I don't care,"He said in the same voice,"I'll wait outside the jail, and the second he comes out, I'll kick his ass. Or better yet, I'll infiltrate the jail, disguised as a guard, then kick his ass."

I laughed at his illogical, but hilarious suggestion. I looked into his eyes, as I tend to do, and saw that the sea was calm, no storms on the horizon.

"What happened then,"Mikey asked,"Why'd you leave him?"

"We dated for almost five months,"I said,"Then, I heard a rumor that he cheated on me, with some high school freshman. I asked him if he did, and he said yes. I asked him why, and he said it was because I wouldn't put out. I left school early that day and ran home. John found me later, bawling my eyes out in my room."

Brian's POV

I went back to my father's apartment, and into my room. I opened the drawer beside my bed, and took out a small jewelry box. I'd put most of the money from the fake kidnapping, sans $700, back into my dad's savings account. I kept the seven hundred, which could have gone toward college or something else for me, to buy something for Sammy. In the box was a diamond necklace, worth exactly $150, to give to her. I thought of buying her clothes, but didn't want to ask her size. I thought of books, but didn't know what she liked to read. _**Idiot! She doesn't wear jewelry.**_ I wanted to spend under $200, so I could afford the other thing I wanted to buy for her: an engagement ring. Five hundred fifty dollars to buy an engagement ring. _**Why waste the money? She won't marry you! She'll say no in a heartbeat. She'll dump you, the world as you know it will come to an end, and reality will hit you like a sledgehammer to the face for thinking that girl wants to spend her life with you!**_I knew we were both too young, and neither of us had a job. _**You just HAD to fall for her, didn't you? You went and fell right into love with her, you stupid, STUPID fool.**_ I knew my father would never go for it, and John..he would kill me for even suggesting such a ridiculous idea. I_**t's simple, buy the ring and say the words: Samantha, will you marry me? Only five words. Simple. Right? I don't have the guts.**_

Sammy's POV

_**He can't possibly love me like I love him!**_I couldn't tell him what I really felt. _**He'll break your heart, Samantha! He'll break your heart, and you'll wake up from this fever dream and be back with John: alone.**_The thought of Brian dumping me, and squashing my heart like the little bug it is, played over and over again in my head. I shoved my head into my pillow and cried.

_Friday, June 21..._

Brian's POV

I visited Sammy at her house. She sat on the porch outside with me. I had the jewelry box with me.

"What's that,"She asked.

"I got you a gift,"I said, standing up,"But, you have to reach it first."

I held the box high above my head. She stood up and reached for it, but couldn't.

"Come on, Bri,"She said,"Gimme the box."

"Nope,"I teased.

She made a fist and pretended like she was going to hit me in the nuts. I crouched down to block myself, and she grabbed the box.

"Very funny, Brian,"She said.

She opened the box and gasped, then started to cry. She hates it!

Sammy's POV

_**That jerk! Just when I thought I couldn't possibly love him anymore, he goes and does something sweet like this!**_

"Sammy, if you don't like it..."

"I..I love it,"I said,"Thank you, Brian."

He took it and put it around my neck. I wiped off my tears. The necklace really was beautiful, a silver chain, with a diamond heart at the center.

"What's wrong,"He asked.

"It's just..you're so nice to me,"I said,"And...you got me this. I don't deserve you."

He put his arm around me.

"I can't buy you anything,"I said.

I ran my hand up his leg to his zipper. He grabbed my hand and moved it from his leg, then leaned kissed me.

"You don't have to,"He said,"You don't owe me anything. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"I really need to tell you something,"I said,"It's important."

"What is it?"

"I love you,"I said,"A lot. In fact, I am undeniably and hopelessly in love with you. My heart melts when I'm with you, and when I think about you."

He stared at me for a second, then smiled.

"Me too,"He said.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure,"He said.

Brian's POV

_**Marry me, Samantha. Marry me, and we can fly away to our own secret place. Maybe Hawaii, or France, or..**_

"If you could go anywhere,"Sammy asked,"Just pack up, get on a plane and go anywhere in the world, where would you go?"

"Right now?"

"Right now."

I thought for a second.

"Hmm..Ireland,"I said.

"I'd go to France,"She said,"Where John and Claire went."

John pulled into the driveway and got out of the car, carrying little John with him.

"Brian,"John said,"What the hell are you doing here?"

"John, look what Brian got me,"Sammy exclaimed.

John smiled, then stared at me for a minute.

"What do you see in him,"He asked Sammy as we went inside.

"Well..you know how you call him 'Big Bri',"She asked.

"Yeah,"John said.

"I could call him that,"She said,"For a DIFFERENT reason."

John made a disgusted face.

"I did NOT need to hear that,"He said.

He went into the kitchen.

"Are you staying for lunch, Bri,"He asked.

"Uh...what is it,"I asked.

"Lunch is where you eat food in the middle of the day,"He said.

"Smartass,"I joked.

Sammy's POV

That night, I drifted into the strangest and most terrifying nightmare I've ever had.

Someone pulls me into the dorm again, and pins me to the wall. It's Brian. He's the only one there. I run for the door, and Brian grabs me. "Stay and have fun,"He says, in his own voice. He makes me face him. There is a bloodthirsty look in his eyes, and an evil smile on his face. He shoves me onto the bed. "What are you going to do to me,"I ask fearfully. "I'm getting what I want,"He says. He pulls my pants off. "Brian, please,"I beg. He hits me. "Shut up, whore,"He demands. My arms are suddenly held above me by an unseen force, and an invisible hand covers my mouth.

I woke up shaking and sweating.

_Friday, June 28.._

I had that same nightmare, every night, for the past week. I'd been avoiding Brian, ignoring his calls. I decided to call him, and tell him the truth.

"Brian,"I asked.

"Sammy?"

"Yeah."

"Samantha, if you're going to break up with me, then do it,"He said,"Don't play games with me."

"No that's not..."

"Why have you been ignoring me?"

"Honestly, because I'm scared,"I said.

"Of what?"

"You,"I said,"Well, the nightmare version of you. It's complicated."

"Complicated,"He asked,"Wanna talk about it."

"Yeah."

"Want me to come over?"

"Will you,"I asked.

"Yeah, sure,"He said,"I'll be there in a bit."

When Brian showed up, he seemed angry, and hurt.

"Are you mad,"I asked.

He nodded. We sat on the couch together.

"I'm sorry,"I told him.

"Tell me about the nightmare,"He said.

"Everytime I go to sleep, I'm back in the dorm, where Nick dragged me. Except, it's not Nick who throws me on the bed and rips off my clothes...it's you."

He stared at me in horror. I remembered the look in his eyes in the nightmare.

"I thought I was over it,"I said.

"Samantha, do you trust me?"

"With my life,"I said.

"Then tell me everything,"He said,"Everything you only tell John, and what you've never told anyone. I want you to trust me with your secrets, your nightmares, and your fears. Tell me when they happen, not a week later."

I put my hand on the back of his neck and pulled him in for a long kiss. He grabbed me and kissed me back.

"Do you forgive me,"I asked.

"Of course I forgive you,"He said.

He lied down with his head on my lap, staring into my eyes.

"When's the last time you slept,"He asked.

"I've slept maybe...ten hours in the last week,"I said.

"Your eyes are red."

"I know."

Brian's POV

I sat up and put my arm around her. I remembered what she did for me after my mother and sister died. I held her close to me, embracing her protectively. She yawned and closed her eyes.

"It was a year ago,"I said quietly,"That they died. June twenty-sixth, nineteen eighty four. I didn't sleep for two whole days. Then you held me, and I finally slept. I dreamt of you."

She began snoring, so I knew she was sleeping. I continued to hold her, reaching for the remote and turning the television on low volume. I was glad she couldn't hear what I was saying.

"I love you,"I said quietly,"I want to marry you. Someday, I want to have children. A boy, maybe a girl. I think you'd be a great mother. We'll get our own house, maybe a beach house. I'm going to buy you an engagement ring. I'm going to propose to you, and I pray to god you'll say yes. If you don't, I might die."

She woke up almost two hours later.

"Hey sleepy-head,"I teased, then asked,"Did you have any nightmares?"

"No,"She said,"But I dreamt we were married, and had kids."

_Wednesday, July 31..._

Sammy's POV

I snuck out with Brian to the lake. It was around midnight, maybe one in the morning. We were on the dock, sandals off, dipping our feet in the water.

"Guess what,"I said.

"What,"He asked.

"I have enough credits to graduate early,"I said.

"Sweet."

"Yep. after first semester, I'll be finished with high school."

"That's terrific,"He said,"Wait, did you bring me here just to tell me that?"

"No,"I said,"Remember how I told you John would bring girls here and they'd do stuff?"

"Mm-hmm."

"And remember how I told you to do anything you wanted to me?"

He smiled at that. He kissed me, then kissed my neck, then put his hand up my shirt.

"Can I be rough with you,"He asked.

"Anything."

He pushed me onto my back like he was angry, but was careful not to let my head hit the dock. He began kissing me, undoing his pants and mine at the same time.

"Brian?"

"Yeah?"

"Put your hand over my mouth,"I said.

"Why?"

"Just do it,"I said,"I want to try something. And don't remove it, no matter what."

He put his hand over my mouth and held it there, then removed my underwear, and his. In that moment, I regained the control I'd lost during the rape. The control to say no, the control to get away. I also gained knowledge. Knowledge that Brian COULD hurt me and I wouldn't be able to scream, and that I really DID trust him with my life. He didn't hurt me, but was somehow rough and gentle at the same time.

He lied next to me as I told him this.

"I read about that,"He said.

"Read about what?"

"Something called a rape fetish,"He said,"Some women have it, guys too. It's not the idea of rape they like. It's like... the idea of being held down with consent, at the mercy of someone you trust, knowing full well they could hurt you, but won't."

"Why do I like it?"

"Maybe, for you, it's a coping mechanism,"He said,"You want to replay what happened, to get past it, but with someone you trust, where you won't get hurt."

"The thing that really stayed with me,"I said,"Was the hand over my mouth, being unable to scream, or say anything."

_Saturday, August 10..._

Brian's POV

I went to a jewelry store on Broadway street, carrying the $550 with me. It was ten a.m., and the store had just opened. I went inside, and walked up to the guy at the front.

"Can I help you,"He asked.

"I'd like to buy an engagement ring,"I said.

"Engagement ring,"He asked,"Aren't you a little young to be getting married?"

"Probably,"I said.

"All right,"He said,"What's your price range?"

"Five hundred fifty dollars,"I said.

"What size,"He asked.

"Eight,"I said.

He left and came back with a selection of about twenty rings sitting inside a spongy ring-holder.

"The price range for these rings are three hundred to five hundred,"he said.

I picked up the first one and examined it closely. _**Not good enough for her.**_ The second one. _**Not enough silver.**_ After looking through all of them, I realized that none of them were good enough for her. _**I could spend a million dollars on a ring, and it wouldn't be good enough. Nothing could MAKE her marry me.**_ I looked at the last one.

"How much is this one,"I asked.

"Four fifty,"He said.

"I'll take it,"I said.

"All right,"He said.

He took the ring and started typing on the computer. He put the ring in the box.

"Would you like the lifetime warranty for twenty five extra dollars,"He asked.

"Yes,"I said.

"That is four hundred seventy five dollars,"He said,"Plus tax. And that makes it... five hundred three dollars and fifty cents."

I took the money out of my pocket and handed it to him. He counted the money, put it in the register, then gave me back change. He handed me the ring in a small bag.

"Thank you for shopping,"He said.

I smiled and left.

When I got home, I hid the ring in my drawer. _**You're wasting money, Brian. She won't marry you, there's no chance.**_


	38. The Proposal

Sammy's POV

I got my class schedule in the mail. I opened it and read it out loud to John.

"First hour is chemistry,"I read,"Second hour art, third hour English, fourth hour calculus, fifth hour consumers ed, sixth hour gym, seventh hour shop, and eighth hour study hall."

"Shop,"John asked,"You're taking shop?"

"Why not,"I said,"It's easy. Besides..have you seen some of the dopes that take shop?"

He laughed and scruffed my hair.

"Fair enough,"He said,"But no flare guns, okay?"

"Yeah,"I chuckled.

I called Brian to tell him.

"Shop, huh,"He asked.

"Yep,"I said.

"Hope you don't have to make any lamps,"He joked.

"John said no flare guns,"I said.

I heard a bark on his line.

"Is that Penny I hear,"I asked.

"Yeah,"He said,"It's time for her walk. We're going to the park, wanna come?"

"I'll have to ask John,"I said.

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

I hung up.

"John, can I go to the park with Brian and Penny,"I asked.

"Who the hell is Pe..oh the dog?"

"Yeah."

"I guess so. But be back before dinnertime, okay?"

"Ok."

Brian's POV

I considered bringing the ring and proposing to her at the park, but changed my mind when I pictured her saying no. I'd walk home in shambles, probably crying my eyes out, kicking myself for being stupid enough to fall for her. I got Penny's leash and put it on her. Penny, a brown furred doggy with a white furred belly, the appearance of a Boston Terrier, and the psychotic excitement of a Jack Russel Terrier, was small enough to fit in our apartment. I was glad when I found out that the building allowed pets under fifty pounds, as I had grown attached to the stray pup.

"Come on, Penny,"I said as I went out the door.

I met Sammy at the park, who immediately handed me a cookie, wrapped in a napkin.

"It's for Penny,"She said,"Snicker-doodle."

I broke off a piece and gave it to Penny, who munched it happily, wagging her tail. I gave the rest to Sammy.

"You feed her,"I said.

Sammy took the cookie and whistled for Penny.

"Sit,"She said.

Penny obeyed. Sammy tossed the cookie to Penny, who ate it.

"And this, is for you,"She said.

She pulled me forward and kissed me. I let her put her tongue in my mouth. Penny started whimpering and pawing at Sammy.

"She thinks I'm hurting you, Brian,"She said.

"Maybe you should hurt me some more,"I joked.

Sammy leaned down to pet the dog.

_Monday, August 19..._

Sammy's POV

Larry was in my calculus class.

"Ready for lunch next hour,"He asked.

"Yeah,"I said.

Larry, Xander, Mike, and Ashley were in lunch with me. Ashley and Xandy sat across from Larry, Mikey and me.

"I guess you two are my body guards,"I joked.

Mikey stood up.

"Everyone, follow me,"He said.

"Where are we going,"I asked.

"You'll see,"He said.

So we followed him, out to the bleachers, where the stoners hang out. The five of us: a stoner, a slut, a nerd, a bodyguard, and a nice girl, all sharing a joint by the bleachers.

Brian's POV

Sammy came over after she got home from school. She told me about her day, then had a really odd request.

"You want me to..WHAT..."I asked.

"Drag me to your room, kicking and screaming,"She repeated.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her up off the couch. She screamed happily. I put my arm around her, pulled her close, and put my hand over her mouth.

"Don't ACTUALLY scream,"I said,"The neighbors will call the cops."

She giggled.

"Off to my room, then,"I said.

I pulled her to my room, not letting her go, as per her request. I locked the door and let go of her. There was a look on her face, and I couldn't tell if it was terror, anger, or regret. I was ready to stop right then. Then she smiled.

"Well..."She asked.

"Well, what,"I asked.

"Continue,"She insisted.

I sighed and pushed her onto my bed, holding her down as much as I could. She yelped as I slipped her shirt off. I covered her mouth.

Sammy's POV

"Shh,"Brian said,"No screaming, remember?"

He removed his pants and whispered in my ear.

"I'm not going to hurt you,"He whispered.

I should've screamed with how hard he pushed into me, it should've hurt, but it didn't. In fact, it felt really good. Brian was the first and only guy that I've been intimate with, who didn't use THAT part as a weapon against me, and I knew he never would.

Brian lied beside me, both of us dressed, and wondered if he hurt me.

"For the last time, I'm okay,"I said.

I kissed him on the lips.

"But thank you for worrying,"I said lightly.

"I just wanna make sure,"He said.

"Wanna know something, Bri,"I asked.

"What,"He asked.

"You were my first,"I said.

"What do you mean?"

"You're the first person I've slept with,"I said,"Willingly. The way I see it, YOU took my virginity, not my father."

He kissed me on the nose and stood up, then helped me up.

Brian's POV

I was tempted to propose to her right then and there, but didn't want to give off the impression that I was only after sex.

"Wanna watch a movie,"I asked.

"Sure,"She said.

She followed me out to the living room. I looked through the VHS tapes for a movie I thought we'd both like.

"Wizard of Oz,"I asked.

"Yeah."

I popped in the tape and rewinded it to the beginning.

"I'll be right back,"I said.

I went to my room and got the giant multi-colored quilt from my closet and brought it back to the couch, and wrapped it around the both of us. She scooted closer to me and I wrapped my arms around her.

When my dad got home, he found Sammy sleeping on my shoulder, and me watching the end credits roll. I woke up Sammy, who yawned and stretched her arms. I folded the quilt and threw it onto my bed.

"Are you staying for dinner, Samantha,"My dad asked.

"I'll ask John,"She said.

Sammy used the phone and called John.

"What'd he say,"I asked.

"He said I could,"She said.

Dinner was chicken and green beans. Sammy poked at her green beans with a fork, as I became increasingly nervous that my dad was going to embarrass me.

"How's John Junior,"My dad asked.

"Good,"Sammy said,"You should come see him."

He started cracking jokes, and that's when I became embarrassed. Sammy seemed to be enjoying it, laughing so hard, she could barely eat her chicken.

Dad gave me the car keys to drive Sammy home.

"Be careful,"He said.

"I will,"I promised him.

I got in my dad's car with Sammy and started the engine.

"Sorry about my dad,"I said.

"Are you kidding,"She laughed,"He's hilarious!"

"You think so, huh?"

"Totally!"

I drove her home and walked her to the door. She kissed me on the lips.

"Brian,"John's voice,"Wanna quit sucking face with my sister?"

Sammy pulled away and went inside, past John. She was clearly not intimidated by John's presence, but I was.

"Hey John,"I said.

He stared angrily at me.

"Well I have to go,"I said.

I turned to leave, but John grabbed me.

"Y..yeah John,"I asked nervously.

"Remember what I said would happen if you hurt Sammy?"

"You'll break every bone in my body,"I said.

"She tells me everything,"He said,"Don't even THINK you can get away with hurting her."

"Me hurting her would be like you hurting Claire,"I said.

"What do you mean?"

"I love her,"I said,"I couldn't dream of hurting her. Even if you weren't here to threaten me, I still wouldn't hurt her. My parents taught me to respect girls,and to never hit them."

He stared blankly.

"Are you going to kill me,"I asked,"If you are, you have to drive my father's car home.."

He smirked.

"You're all right, Brian,"He said.

I got back in the car and drove back to the apartment. I went inside and handed the keys to my dad.

"She's a terrific girl, Brian,"He said.

"I know,"I said,"That's why I love her."

"She's a keeper,"He said lightly.

I nodded and went into my room. I took the ring out of the drawer and looked at it. _**Yep, she's a keeper, all right. I'm gonna marry her.**_

_Sunday, September 15.._

Sammy's POV

I called Brian, who was staying at his father's apartment, rather than the dorm.

"It is three in the morning,"He said.

"Do you know what today is,"I asked.

Brian's POV

"No,"I said.

"It was exactly one year ago,"She said,"When you found me in that dorm."

It WAS the fifteenth. I remembered that day.

**Flashback..**

**I ran into the dorm to where I heard the scream, to find Sammy, barely dressed, eyes closed, and crying.**

**"Oh my god,"I exclaimed,"What happened to you?!"**

**"No..."She mumbled fearfully.**

**"Sammy, it's me, Brian,"I said.**

**She opened her eyes and looked at me. There was fear and shame on her face.**

**"Don't look at me,"She begged.**

**I handed her the clothes that lay on the floor, then looked away while she got dressed. She stood up, her pants immediately covered in blood. I knew exactly what happened. ****_Who would do this? Who could do this to Samantha?_**** My heart was hurting to see her like this. I ran over to the phone and called an ambulance. Sammy was whimpering and hyperventilating, her eyes darting around the room. I tried to get close to her, but she backed away, staring at me like a wounded animal, like I'd done this. She started to shake.**

**"Samantha,"I said softly,"Whoever hurt you, is gone now. They're not coming back."**

**She sat on the bed, crying out in pain. I sat by her. **

**"Samantha, it's me, Brian,"I repeated,"Your boyfriend, remember?"**

**She grabbed my hand.**

**"Don't tell John,"She pleaded.**

**"I have to,"I said.**

**"No,"She wailed,"He'll be angry at me! Please!"**

**"Okay, I won't,"I said.**

**The ambulance came later, and they tried to stop the bleeding. I was crying, knowing that someone could only lose so much blood before they died.**

**She was given stitches, just one or two internal stitches. I had to stay in the waiting room as she was swabbed and questioned by police. When I got to see her, she was conscious, but tired from the painkillers. **

**John came by later.**

**"What happened,"He asked.**

**I nearly cried as I told him.**

**"She..she was raped,"I said, my voice breaking,"She needed stitches."**

**He ran over to Sammy's bedside. She was sleeping.**

**"She's tired,"I said,"They gave her some pain medicine."**

**"Why didn't you call me earlier,"He asked.**

**"She didn't want me to call,"I said,"She thought you'd be angry."**

**She opened her eyes.**

**"Johnny,"She asked.**

**"Yeah,"John said,"I'm here. And I'm not angry."**

**She nodded and squeezed his hand.**

**"Who did this to you,"He asked.**

**"Three,"She said.**

**"Three,"John question**

**"There were three guys,"She said.**

**_Three? One rape is bad enough, but three. Someone put her through that, and she survived. But who? Who would want to do that to her?!_**

**"Did you see them,"I asked.**

**"Yeah,"She said,"It was Nick. And two of his 'college buddies'."**

**_Nick. Her ex. That bastard!_**** I ran to the bathroom and threw up while she and John weren't looking. The thought of him hurting her like that made me sick to my stomach, and angry. So angry, that I could kill Nick if I ever saw him again, and so could John. **

**She woke me up later that night.**

**"What are you doing up,"I whispered.**

**"I thought he would stop,"She said,"I didn't think it would get this far."**

**She blinked back tears. I grabbed her hand. **

**"Larry helped me,"She said,"He was my bodyguard, at school."**

**She put her hand gently behind my neck. **

**"Brian...I'm sorry,"She said.**

**"For what,"I asked.**

**"I feel like...I...cheated on you,"She said.**

**_How could she POSSIBLY think that?_**

**"No,"I assured her,"No way."**

_Present..._

"Yeah, I remember,"I said.

"I can't sleep,"She said,"I didn't want to bother Claire or John, they've been so tired, taking care of the baby."

"Wanna go down to the lake,"I asked,"To talk?"

"Okay,"She said.

"I'll be there in a little bit,"I said.

I hung up the phone, then snuck out the door, and down to the lake. It was maybe fifteen minutes or so away. Sammy met me on the dock.

"You okay,"I asked her.

"Yeah,"She said.

"What did they ask you,"I asked,"In the hospital."

"They asked what happened,"She said,"They asked if I knew who did it, I told them I did. They thought it was you at first. They asked if you were abusive, or if you threatened me."

"What'd you tell them,"I teased.

"I told them you were an abusive tyrant, who should be executed,"She teased back.

"Good thing I went on the run then,"I joked.

"Wanna go for a swim?"

"Sounds good."

She slipped off her shoes and put them in a pile.

"You're just FULL of surprises, aren't you,"I said.

She folded her clothes and put them in a pile.

Sammy's POV

I sat down on the dock and plopped into the water. The water went up to my neck. I stood on my tiptoes, the lake floor was hard, but squishy.

"Come on, Brian,"I teased,"It's cold, I need you to hold me."

He removed his clothes, put them by mine and jumped in.

"How big is this lake,"He asked.

"Dunno. Let's go see."

We swam out to the middle, where neither of us could reach, and I kissed him. Then we swam to the other side, where there was sand. He lied me down on the shore and started kissing my dripping wet body. I pulled him on top of me.

"You sure,"He asked.

I grabbed his golden hair.

"Yes,"I said.

And so we did it on the little shore. When we were done, he followed me back to the dock. I didn't expect to see anyone there, but someone stood on the dock.

"Shit,"I whispered,"It's John! Hide!"

Brian plugged his nose and went underwater. I swam closer to the dock.

"John,"I said.

"Are these your clothes,"John asked.

"No."

"Oh really? Then get out."

"I'd rather not."

"Why are you swimming naked in a lake,"He asked, annoyed.

"Umm.."

Brian jumped up, gasping for air.

"Is he naked too,"John yelled.

Brian swam under the deck.

"Get dressed,"John demanded,"Get in the car. And Brian, go home. Or stay here, I really don't care."

John walked away. I waved to Brian, got dressed, then followed John out to the car. I was shivering, so John turned on the heater.

"How'd you know,"I asked.

"You left the door open,"He said,"And you two always sneak out to the lake."

"It's been a year, Johnny,"I said.

"I know,"He said.

He held me and rubbed my back as I sobbed heavily.

_Thursday, November 7..._

Brian's POV

Today was Sammy's 17th birthday. _**Don't be such a wimp! Get on one knee, show her the ring, and propose! Five words, Brian! You're stressing over five DAMN words.**_ I woke up that morning, got dressed, and waited for my dad to drive me to the college.

Sammy's POV

_**Well, you've done it again, Samantha!**_It was six thirty, the morning of my birthday, and I was hurling into the toilet. This was NOT the flu. Claire quietly walked into the bathroom and held my hair back. When I stood up, she gave me a rag to wipe my face. This had been happening almost everyday for the past few weeks. It was easy to fool John, considering that I puke quietly, but you can't slip morning sickness past someone who's had it.

"Have you told him,"She asked.

"Not yet,"I said,"But I will."

I got ready for school, and decided to skip breakfast. J_**ust tell him! It's not that hard! Three words: Brian, I'm pregnant. Or, Brian, I'm having your baby. I can't do this! I just can't!**_

Brian visited my house that afternoon. Larry, Ashley, Xandy, and Mike were also there. Claire had made a cake. I hid in the bathroom while everyone talked to each other. I sat on the floor, crying. _**What will Brian think? Will he still love me with a baby? Will he leave me?**_ I was glad that at least it was the offspring of the person I loved growing in me, and not some rapist's. Not that I hated Cynthia, she's just an innocent baby. I never could've cared for her properly, never truly given her the love she deserves. I stood up and wiped off my tears, the went out to talk to Brian, who looked as nervous as I felt.

_Sunday, December 1..._

Brian's POV

Sammy came over to visit. I let her in, she was wearing her winter jacket, which she wouldn't take off. She stared at me sadly.

"Is something wrong,"I asked.

This triggered something for her, and she burst into tears.

"I..I don't know how to tell you this,"She said,"So I'll show you."

She took off her coat and showed me her bulging stomach.

"I'm pregnant,"She said,"It's..yours."

Sammy's POV

Brian stared in bewilderment, completely silent, and jaw dropped.

"Brian, say something,"I begged,"Anything! Please!"

It was obvious he wasn't ready, so I turned and started to leave. He grabbed my wrist gently, I turned to face him, and he kissed me.

"I'll be right back,"He said.

He ran to his room and returned with a small jewelry box.

"I've been waiting,"He said,"Since August, even sooner, to get up the courage to do this. There's no turning back now."

He got on one knee, and opened the box, revealing a ring.

"Samantha, will you marry me?"

Brian's POV

I looked up at her. She was frozen, stunned. _**Congratulations Brian! You've made a complete idiot out of yourself! You fool, she doesn't love you!**_ I let the tears fall.

"You...you've had this ring,"She asked,"Since August?"

"I didn't have the guts to ask you,"I said.

"Brian, my answer in August would have been the same that it is now."

"Which is?"

"Yes, Brian,"She said,"I will marry you."

I put the ring on her finger, then stood up and hugged her. I felt her stomach. My baby, my son or daughter.

"Have..you been to a doctor yet,"I asked.

"No,"She said.

"We'll go tomorrow,"I said,"To the clinic. After school."

She told me about her morning sickness.

"It stopped,"She said,"I'm just hungry all the time."

"Are you hungry right now?"

She nodded. I went to the cupboard and got out some spaghetti noodles, and started boiling water. Along with the noodles, I got some garlic bread from the freezer,and put it in the oven. I waited for the water to boil, then put in the noodles. While waiting for them to cook, I got two plates, two forks, and two napkins out and set them on the table. After that, the noodles were ready to be drained, and sauce added in. I served the noodles onto the plates and took out the garlic bread. I set the Parmesan cheese on the table. Sammy grabbed a piece of bread and sat down at a chair.

"That's sweet Brian,"She said,"Thank you."

"Sorry there's no meat,"I said.

"It's okay,"She said.

She sprinkled Parmesan cheese on her spaghetti, then gave it to me. I ate mine quickly, and only had two servings. She ate the entire pot of spaghetti.

"I take it you were hungry,"I joked.

_Monday, December 2.._

Sammy's POV

Claire went with Brian and I to the clinic so I could get a sonogram. We needed Claire to sign legal papers. The three of us went into the room. I got into a robe, lied down on a table, and gel was put on my stomach. The little machine with a tube and a ball attached to it was put on my stomach. I saw the baby on the picture on the machine.

"There's two of them,"The doctor said,"Looks like you're having twins."

I smiled.

"Are they okay,"I asked.

"They look very healthy,"She said.

Claire drove me home, bringing Brian with us, and demanding that we tell John about this. Brian stood out in the cold as Claire and I went in. John was in the living room.

"John,"Claire said,"Sammy needs to tell you something."

John looked at me.

"What's up,"He asked.

"I'm pregnant,"I said,"With twins."

He went wide eyed and his jaw dropped.

"Did...did...who..who did this?!"

"Brian,"I said.

He chuckled, then glared.

"Where is he,"He demanded.

"Outside,"I said.

Claire and I followed him outside, where Brian was.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU,"John yelled.

John grabbed Brian by the hair and slammed his head into the door. Brian yelped and covered his mouth, which was bleeding.

"John,"I screamed.

Before John could hit Brian again, I put my arms around Brian and blocked him with my body. Claire pulled John away from Brian and I. Brian was still cupping his mouth.

"Brian, let me see,"I said.

He put his hand down. His lip was split open. I took him inside and gave him a tissue for his mouth. John and Claire came in later.

"Don't kill him John,"I said,"He's a father."

"I overreacted,"John said.

I put my arm around Brian and showed John the engagement ring.

"Brian got me this,"I said,"In August. He proposed yesterday."

"Oh did he?"

"I love him,"I said,"And he loves me. And no amount of you beating him up is going to change that."

John sighed.

"It's gonna be hard calling you my brother in law, Brian,"John said.


	39. Twins

_Tuesday, December 3..._

I was at the lunch table with Larry, Xander, Ashley, and Mike.

"Okay you guys,"I said,"Guess what?"

"What,"Ashley asked.

"I'm having twins,"I said quietly,"And...Brian and I are getting married."

"When,"Mikey asked.

"Dunno,"I said,"But all of you will be invited. I just need your addresses, so I can send you invitations."

Ashley nodded and tore a piece of paper out of her notebook. She wrote her address and passed it around. When everyone was done, the paper was handed to me and I put it in my pocket.

"Hey Mikey,"I said,"John said I could visit Cynthia today."

"Sure,"He said,"My parents should be okay with it."

The last time I'd seen her was the day after my birthday.

John's POV

I watched as little Johnny crawled to the kitchen and used a chair to help himself stand up. I smiled when I saw his bright brown eyes staring at me, as if he'd just climbed Mt. Everest.

"Good job,"I said,"Time for lunch."

I picked him up and set him in his high chair. I got a hot dog from the package in the fridge and cut it into tiny pieces. I warmed it up in the microwave, made sure it wasn't too hot, and set it on his high chair table.

"No,"He said.

Stubborn. He got that from me. What did my parents do when I didn't eat? I laughed. They probably slapped me right in the face. I went and heated up two more hot dogs on a plate and started eating them. He followed my example and ate his lunch.

"Juice,"He asked after eating.

I got up and poured some juice into his sippy cup.

"I love you, Johnny,"I said.

"Love you,"He repeated.

That was the first time he'd said that, and I'd been telling him I loved him every day of his almost 365 day life.

Little John sat with me on the couch, scribbling with crayons in a coloring book. I wondered when Claire would come to her senses and leave me. I knew Sammy would soon run off with Brian. Not so much run off as get married, but I didn't want to lose her. I knew Brian was a good guy, but I also knew people could change. I knew that people sometimes turned on each other after marriage, like my parents. And I wasn't going to let that happen with Sammy. If Brian ever hurt her...I'd kill him. In fact I'd kill just about anyone who hurt Sammy, or Claire, or little Johnny. Questions nagged at the back of my mind, questions that I'd forced myself to forget. _**Will Claire turn on me? Will she dump me? Will she hurt me?**_ I put little John in his crib.

I honestly had nothing against Brian. It's just the thought of him screwing my sister that pissed me off to no end. Brian visited later, after he got off from college, and before Sammy got back, and Claire was at work. I told him where everyone was.

"So...no one's here,"He asked.

"Little John's sleeping in his crib,"I said,"No witnesses, Brian."

Though I was joking, Brian looked a little scared.

"I'm glad you're staying with her,"I said.

"I love her,"He said,"How could I not? Besides, you'd kill me if I left."

I smiled at that. I was glad he was still a little scared of me. That way, I could chase him away if needed. My mind was trained to see the worst in people. For Brian, it was his size alone. He'd gotten a lot taller since I first met him, and was gaining muscle mass. He barely looked like a geek anymore, except for his nervous fidgeting. His fists, which he was twitching nervously, could inflict some serious damage if he wanted to. He could hurt Samantha, and she wouldn't tell a soul, because she would still love him. That was Samantha's worst trait: her loyalty. She defends the people she loves, up until the day she dies.

"I know you won't hurt her,"I said,"But..if you went through what her and I went through, maybe you'd understand why I'm so protective of her."

"I get it,"He said,"I was the same way about Maggie."

I'd forgotten that Brian's life had been downhill a lot in the past couple years. His mother and sister dying, finding out he was adopted, and having to live with his formerly abusive father, who I'm sure he's still afraid of.

"Does your father know,"I asked.

"Yeah. I told him yesterday. He nearly kicked me out."

_Wednesday, December 25..._

It was Christmas, and little John's first birthday. We made him a cake, topped with a candle shaped like a one, which he and I blew out the flame. Johnny Jr. proceeded to stick his hand in the cake, grab a handful, then shove it in his mouth. Claire gave him a piece, which he got all over himself.

"He gets his eating habits from you, John,"Claire said.

"Very funny,"I joked.

Brian's POV

I sat on the bed in Sammy's room, she was laying down. She had said she didn't feel well. I put my hand on her stomach and rubbed it gently.

"They moved,"I said.

She laughed.

"They do that,"She joked.

"You're beautiful,"I said,"You know that?"

"Thank you, Brian,"She said,"But how many times are you going to tell me that?"

"Until you believe it,"I said,"Sorry I got you into this."

"I'm not,"She said,"I always wanted a family. I wanted a husband, who would treat me better than my parents treated each other. I wanted MY children to have a better childhood than I did."

"What do you think they'll be?"

"What do you want them to be?"

"Uh..humans,"I joked,"Preferably."

She was starting to cry.

"What's wrong,"I asked.

"We have no money, no where to go, no jobs, nothing. And I'm having twins. TWINS! What the hell are we going to do?!"

I put my hand behind her hair.

"We'll figure something out,"I assured her.

* * *

><p><em><strong>1986<strong>_

* * *

><p><em>Monday, March 3...<em>

John's POV

I came home to Claire greeting me at the door.

"I have some news, John,"She said.

"Please don't tell me you're pregnant again,"I joked.

She giggled, then handed me a letter.

"Your book is the tenth best selling nonfiction so far,"She said.

"Great,"I said.

Later that night, I put little John to bed, then got in bed with Claire. John Jr. was in his own room, a room he would soon share with my two nieces or nephews.

"When Sammy was born, my parents wouldn't let me see her,"I said.

"Why not?"

"I dunno,"I said.

"Are you still mad about Sammy marrying Brian,"She asked.

"Who said I was mad?"

"You busted his lip open when you found out she was pregnant,"She said.

"I do actually like Brian,"I said,"He's a good guy. Just the thought of them doing it seriously pisses me off."

"Get used to it,"She joked.

I gave her a playful glare. I heard Sammy scream. Claire and I ran to her room, to find her lying on her bed, liquid everywhere.

"Her water broke,"Claire muttered.

We helped Sammy out to the car, and drove her to the hospital. When we got in there, she was taken to the birthing room. While Claire went to call Brian, I followed Sammy into the room she was taken. She was moaning and screaming. She had monitors hooked to her, and her legs on the metal thing they use for pregnant women.

Brian's POV

I woke up my dad and we drove quickly to the hospital. He waited in the waiting room, and I went to be with Sammy.

"Good luck, son,"He said.

I nodded and went to stand by Sammy's side, holding her hand. John and I stayed with her as she began to dilate.

_Tuesday, March 4..._

It was noon before Sammy started to push out the first baby.

"You're doing great,"I said.

She squeezed my hand tightly and probably John's, and screamed.

"It's a girl,"The doctor said.

He let Sammy, John, and I see the beautiful blonde haired, blue eyed girl, before she was taken out of the room to be examined.

"One down, one to go,"The doctor said.

It was another three hours before the other baby decided to make an appearance. She screamed loudly when this baby came out.

"It's a boy,"The doctor said.

Sammy fainted as soon as the baby came out.

"Sammy, are you okay,"I asked,"Sammy, wake up."

I'd read somewhere that women die during childbirth, especially when they're young. No bleeding or anything, they just die. NO. I won't lose someone else.

"Is...is she going to be okay,"I asked.

"Her heartbeat is normal,"The doctor said,"She's breathing well."

"Why is she passed out?"

"Sometimes women faint after childbirth. Especially with more than one baby. And with Samantha's young age, a twin birth can be quite exhausting."

"So..she's just tired?"

"Yes,"He said,"And probably dehydrated. We'll give her some fluids, and she should wake up in a few hours."

Claire (along with John Jr.), John, my father, and I went to see my baby son and daughter in the nursery. I began to cry.

"I..I have a daughter,"I said to myself.

"AND a son,"My father said.

Sammy woke up later, and all of us got to see her. Andy and Allison, who lived in an apartment in Chicago, were able to drive down to visit. I held Sammy's hand again, as did John.

"Have you picked names yet, Brian,"She asked.

"No. I wanted to wait untill you were awake,"I said.

"The boy,"She said,"We should name Trevor."

"Why Trevor,"I asked.

"Dunno. Just came to me."

"What about the girl?"

"Maggie,"I said boldly.

She smiled.

"It's perfect,"She said.

_Wednesday, March 5..._

Sammy got to come home after overnight observation at the hospital. The cribs for the twins were already set up in little John's room. Maggie's crib had pink sheets, Trevor's crib had blue sheets. I set Maggie in her crib, while Sammy set Trevor in his crib. Trevor Malcolm Johnson. Magenta(Maggie) Ralph Johnson. Those were the names on the birth certificates. I had stressed so much about being a father since Sammy told me she was pregnant. What if I treat them like my parents treated me? What if I pressure them too much, push them over the edge? I'd never forgive myself.

"Samantha, there's another girl I love,"I said,"Her name is Magenta."

"Brian, there's another boy I love,"She played along,"His name is Trevor."

John and John Jr. came in the room, little John reaching for Sammy to pick him up. She picked him up and faced him toward Trevor's crib.

"This is your cousin,"She said,"Trevor."

She took him to Maggie's crib.

"And this, is your other cousin,"She said,"Maggie."

She set him down and he ran back to his father.

"You should get some rest, Sammy,"John said,"You can feed them later. Brian, you should go to sleep too. I'll watch them."

I was watching the babies like a hawk. Sammy left, probably to her room.

"I don't want to leave them,"I said,"Not that I don't trust you, John. I do."

"It's like a dream,"He said, as if reading my thoughts,"If you take your eyes off them, they might just disappear."

I nodded, still watching the twins.

"Brian, it's okay,"He said,"I'll watch them, they'll be here."

"Okay."

I left the room sadly, thinking I wouldn't see the little dreams again.

Sammy's POV

I was beginning to fall asleep when someone crawled into bed with me. I was genuinely afraid when the person wrapped their arms around me. Then I felt safe. Wait a minute...

"Brian,"I asked.

"That's my name,"He joked,"Don't wear it out."

"You scared me,"I said.

"I didn't mean to,"He said.

"Jerk,"I joked, and slapped his hand.

He kissed my neck and ran his hand playfully down my thigh. I groaned.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking,"He teased.

"Brian, you are relentless,"I joked.

He chuckled.

"We should go to sleep,"He said.

"Fine. But Brian?"

"Yeah?"

"Just because we're getting married, doesn't mean we're going to screw twenty-four seven."

"Agreed."

_Sunday, June 1..._

It was the day of my high school graduation. John woke me up, along with Trevor, the loudmouth. Brian sometimes stayed the night at our house. Other nights, he'd sleep at his father's apartment, even bringing the babies with him. I'd become protective of the twins, my babies, and so had Brian. He was especially protective of Magenta. There was a definite connection there. She was a future 'daddy's girl'. I took my graduation cap and gown out of my closet and put it on. I sighed and went into the living room, where John and little Johnny were waiting. Claire was in the room with the twins, dressing them. Maggie wore a red polka dot dress, and Trevor wore a blue onesie. I picked up Trevor and held him.

"Almost time to go,"I said.

"Brian's meeting you there,"Claire asked.

"Yeah."

Brian and his dad met us at the high school.

"Brian, will you hold Magenta, while I..uh, graduate,"I asked.

"Sure,"He said.

I handed him the portable crib Maggie was in. Claire held Trevor, while John Jr. had his arms wrapped around John's neck. I scanned the crowed of arriving people for my school buddies. And I found them, Larry and Mikey, both in their caps and gowns, Ashley, and Xandy, coming to greet me.

"Hey guys,"I said,"That's John and John junior, Claire is holding Trevor. Here's Brian, holding Magenta, Maggie for short."

I got in line with the other graduates, including Mikey and Larry. Xander and Ashley were juniors. We went into the gym, sat down and waited for our names to be called. Somehow, I had become the valedictorian, and had to make a speech. Larry was the saluditorian.

"Samantha Bender..."

My name was called. **Holy shit.** I went up to the stage and grabbed my diploma and blew a kiss to Brian. I sat at my seat while more names were called.

John's POV

I never thought I'd ever be here, or even want to be here again. I had to be. This is Samantha's graduation. My little sister is graduating. Two years early. To say I'm proud of her is an understatement. She's changed, I guess we all have. She's a mother. Claire has let her red hair grow past shoulder length, while I've cut mine a little. And Brian, sitting next to Claire and holding Magenta, now towered over Samantha. He's at least half a foot taller than her, and he's filled out, looking nothing like his previously nerdy self. I've noticed he holds Samantha and the twins in the same way I hold Claire and little John; firmly and gently, as if protecting them from some unseen monster. John Jr. was falling asleep on my lap. Brian was looking around nervously at Magenta, Trevor, then at Samantha in her seat.

Sammy's POV

When I got home, I found a letter in the mailbox. It was an acceptance letter. A full ride scholarship to

"The university of Iowa,"John asked,"You're going to Iowa?!"

"They have a day care center,"I said,"And a place for couples and thier children. And Brian's going next year. Aren't you, Brian?"

"I...was planning on it,"Brian said.

"How much is this going to cost,"John asked.

"Nothing,"I said,"I already told them I have a child."

"Children,"John corrected,"You have children."

"The hours can be fit to our schedule,"I said.

"You're moving then?"

"Just during the school year,"I said,"I'll visit on holidays, and in summer. It's only a few hours away. I can come over on weekends."

"And what do I have to do?"

"Sign a bunch of papers."

"I'll think about it."

_Friday, July 4..._

Brian and I went with John, Claire, and little John to the park to see the fireworks. Maggie and Trevor were too young, so Brian's dad offered to watch them. John and Claire were eating dinner at a picnic table, while Brian and I were at a bench at the other side of the park.

"Exactly four months,"I said,"Today."

"Yep,"Brian answered,"Think they'll be okay?"

"They'll be fine,"I assured him,"You have to stop worrying so much."

"I can't help it."

I flinched when he put his arm around me, then cracked his knuckles.

"Are you having the dreams again,"He asked.

"It's after we get married,"I said,"You never do it in front of the kids, or anyone."

"What happens?"

"It always starts with yelling. You call me names, 'bitch', 'slut', 'whore', things like that. Then you beat me, untill I can't move."

I grabbed his hands and interlocked his fingers with mine.

"How long,"He asked.

"A couple weeks,"I said,"The details change, and the setting, but it's still you."

"Have you told anyone,"He asked,"Besides me?"

The question reminded me of the dream: 'Did you tell them,'Brian would yell,'Did you tell them I beat you?! Lying whore!'

"No,"I said.

He looked sad, but sympathetic.

"It's not just you,"I said,"I have nightmares about John too."

"I'd give my life for you Sammy,"He said,"And the children."

_Friday, August 14..._

I finished packing my things for the college. I saw John standing in the doorway, tearing up.

"I'll miss you,"He said.

"John, I'll still see you,"I said.

"I knew you were going soon,"His voice broke,"I still thought we had more time. And now, you're packing to leave."

I went to hug him. I didn't realize how much me leaving would effect him.

"It's..dangerous out there, Sammy,"He warned.

"I know,"I said,"I'll be okay. And so will Maggie and Trevor. Besides, Brian will be there to protect us."

He scowled at Brian's name. I feel like John resents Brian for moving out together, like Brian stole me from him.

"It's okay, Johnny. I'll call you. Everyday. I'll visit on weekends, if I can, and holidays."

There was a look in his watery eyes, a look similar to the hurt, confusion, and betrayal after Sandra dumped him. _**Just another person he loves, leaving him.**_

_Saturday, August 15..._

Brian's POV

My dad drove me to the college, crying slightly and telling me how much he'd miss me, which only made me feel guilty about leaving. Sammy was driving with John and the twins. Claire was at home, with John Jr. She'd said goodbye to us yesterday. John left at seven in the morning. My father and I left at eight. I was excited to see Sammy, Trevor, and Maggie. It was noon when we got to the college and checked into the dorm. Sammy and John were there, waiting for us. Sammy had her bed made, purple sheets, two giant pillows and a bunch of bags on her bed. I put my suitcases on the unused bed. John kissed Sammy on the head, jokingly glared at me for a second, then left. My dad said goodbye, and gave me a hug, embarrassing me in front of Sammy.

When Sammy and I were finally alone, I gave her a long kiss.

"Have you fed them yet,"I asked.

"This morning,"She said,"It's about time for lunch."

I nodded as she went to go feed Maggie and Trevor. I made my bed. I felt bad for Sammy. She'd never been away from home like this, separated from her almost father John. I twisted the engagement ring on my finger and hoped that I could make this better for her. The twins stayed in a child-sized room connected to ours. Claire had gotten her a baby monitor. Sammy came back into the room.

"I put them to bed,"She said,"They'll probably need a diaper change in a few hours or so."

She sat on my bed. I put my hand on her cheek.

"I missed you,"I said.

"Since yesterday,"She asked, chuckling.

"No, I mean..I've missed you,"I said,"We haven't..you know.."

"We have twins, Bri,"She said,"And I don't want ANOTHER child right now."

"I know. It's just.."

"When do you wanna get married,"She interrupted.

"I dunno. Soon I hope."

"Me too,"She said,"I have to be 18 first."

"Does John still hate me,"I asked.

"He doesn't hate you,"She said,"He just..isn't used to the thought of us."

"He's hated me from the moment we started dating,"I said.

"He's just being a good brother,"She said.

"Right."

She pressed her forehead against mine.

"You are the BEST thing that has ever happened to me,"She said.


	40. Brian and Sammy's Wedding

_Saturday, September 20..._

John's POV

I carried little John with me at the grocery store. I was in line paying for my groceries when I saw a women who looked just like Sammy, only with short grayish hair and a slightly wrinkled face, middle aged, a scowl on her face. A chill went up my spine. _**HER. But, how? She's in jail, three more years.**_ I took my groceries, and little John, and walked out quickly. I hurried and put the groceries in the trunk and put Johnny in his car seat.

"Not even gonna say hi to your mother, huh, Johnny boy,"I knew that voice.

I was ashamed of how scared I was. I took a deep breath and straightened my spine, I wasn't going to let her see me cower. I turned and faced her. I toppled over her nearly a foot, but she terrified me.

"Shouldn't you be in jail,"I asked with clenched teeth.

"Good behavior,"She said,"Who's the kid?"

I swallowed my anger.

"My SON,"I said.

"Who'd you knock up,"She asked.

God, I hate her.

"My wife,"I snapped.

"Just like your father,"She said,"He knocked me up too."

I scowled.

"I am not him! I will NEVER BE HIM!"

This only made her smile. Her smile was like Samantha's, but more evil, and not at all innocent. The smile of someone who enjoyed my suffering. She had me scared, and she knew it. I walked back to the driver's side door, stopped, and turned around.

"One more thing,"I added,"You stay the HELL away from my family, that includes Sammy! If you hurt them, I will NOT hesitate to KILL you!"

I got in my car and slammed the door, half expecting her to come over and beat the shit out of me. I wouldn't put it below her to humiliate me in front of my son. I left the parking lot and drove quickly home. I felt like I'd just escaped a severe beating. I didn't realize that my hands were shaking. I reached our driveway and took out the keys. I was frozen for a second, then slammed my fists on the dashboard. I let out a blood-curdling scream, as loud as my throat would allow. I heard Johnny start to cry. He'd never heard me that loud before. I was still angry. I wanted to yell at him, tell him to shut up, hit him, punch him, do what THEY did to me. I unbuckled and got out of the car. _**I will not be like THEM.**_ I opened the door where little John sat. _**I am NOT my father.**_

"I'm not mad at you Johnny,"I said.

He looked up at me as I removed him from his car seat and picked him up.

"I'm mad at that lady,"I said.

"Why?"

"Well..she did bad things,"I said,"She hurt me, and aunt Sammy."

He wrapped his arms around my neck as I carried him inside, and I was glad I went with the nonviolent approach. I didn't realize how scared I was untill I locked the front door and sat on the couch. I was crying. _**Crying! Like a baby.**_

Sammy's POV

I got off the phone with John. I tried to do my homework, but couldn't. The memories came back. _**She is just as much to blame as our father. Poor John. He had to SEE her, to TALK to her.**_ I knew John and I were glad it wasn't our father out of jail. I wished I could be there to comfort Johnny. Brian was still at the library, so I was alone with the twins.

Claire's POV

"I almost hurt him, Claire,"John said after he told me what happened.

"But you didn't,"I said,"And that's what matters. John, its only been two years. No one expects you to forget what happened."

"You don't know her,"He said,"She beat me too. It wasn't just HIM."

I held his hand.

"I'm a coward,"He said,"I'm weak."

He pulled his hand away and stiffened his back. His face was straight, hiding himself again.

"Johnny, it's okay to be scared,"I said.

He didn't look at me, just stared straight forward.

"ARE you scared,"I asked.

"She made Sammy watch,"He said plainly.

"Huh?"

"My old man was beating me up,"He continued,"Something about stealing his cigarettes. I told him to fuck off, and before I knew it, I was on the floor, being punched and kicked. Sammy was at the top of the steps. Our mother dragged her down and held her in place, facing me, telling her to watch me get what I deserve. When I saw Sammy there, I knew she would hate me."

He'd never told me that story before. They made Sammy WATCH! I could only imagine how I'd feel if I had to watch MY brother get beat up.

"Sammy loves you,"I said.

"Well, she shouldn't,"He said,"I'm a terrible brother. I never protected her from anything."

"She's your sister,"I said,"She loves you. And you're not a coward. What your parents did was beyond wrong."

"What if she finds out where I live?"

_Thursday, December 25..._

John Junior, the baby that John and I made together is now two years old. He's grown quickly, so has John, and so have I. Two years, almost three, since I met John in detention that day. He was such an asshole! Good thing I gave him a chance. I watched him play with little John, and watch little Johnny laugh and scream happily.

Sammy's POV

"When's the wedding,"Brian asked.

"January,"I said,"Claire's helping plan it."

"Where at,"He asked.

"The church,"I said,"On Broadway street."

"John and Claire get Niagara Falls, and we get a church,"He joked.

He put his arm around me as the two of us watched the twins in their cribs. Looking back, I remembered the day I met him at the hospital, how John had described him as a nerd. How I got to know him, learned to trust him. How he told me he loved me, drunk and dancing. We were just kids when we fell in love. Now we're adults, we have children, we're a family.

* * *

><p><strong>1987-<strong>

* * *

><p><em>Monday, January 5...<em>

Ah, dress shopping with Claire. Two hours, and not a single choice made. I was getting sick of this, but Claire seemed to be enjoying it. Too big, too small, too short, too long.

"It's hopeless,"I said,"Fifteen dresses, not a single one fits."

And so, somewhere around the twentieth dress, I found one. Claire refused to tell me the price.

"You can't put a price on love,"She kept telling me.

_Saturday, January 24..._

Brian's POV

I checked the clock: six a.m. Since when am I up this early? Since you decided to get married, you dope! I paced around my room in my dad's apartment nervously. I couldn't sleep. Not now, now with everything on my mind. What if I look bad? What if she doesn't show up? What if she just calls it off? Calm down, Brian, that won't happen. Probably. Yep, that definitely will probably maybe not happen.

Sammy's POV

Trevor was wide awake. Magenta woke up, presumably from Trevor's crying. I tended to them, changing their diapers.

_8:00 A.M._

_**Six hours untill the wedding. Terrific. Just enough time to drive to Canada.**_

"Sammy?"

"Hey John,"I said.

"Nervous,"He asked.

"What do you think,"I asked.

"Hmm,"He said,"How long have you been up?"

"Since the twins woke up,"I answered.

He leaned his head against the wall in the hallway.

"Are you angry,"I asked.

"Actually, yeah I am,"He admitted.

"Why?"

"You already moved out,"He started,"You're getting married. To Brian!"

"I thought you liked him,"I suggested.

"I. HATE. HIM,"He said with clenched teeth.

"Well...I love him,"I said,"And you just have to deal with it."

"I don't want to lose you Sammy!"

He didn't hate Brian. He was afraid. Afraid of losing me to Brian. Afraid that once I got married, I'd leave him behind, forget about him.

"John..you are my brother,"I said,"And NOTHING, could EVER change that. You won't lose me. I'll be here for you, always."

He slammed the back of his head against the wall. I hugged him.

"I love you, John,"I said.

"I love you too, Samantha,"He said.

"You can still call me Sammy,"I said lightly.

"I know."

"Still walking me down the aisle?"

"Of course."

"Good,"I said,"I'm glad. But one thing?"

"What's that?"

"When you see Brian, please don't cause him bodily harm,"I requested.

He smirked.

"No promises,"He joked.

_10:00 A.M._

Brian's POV

"Brian, do you want pancakes,"My dad asked.

"Pancakes? PANCAKES?! I'm getting married in four hours, and you want me to eat pancakes?!"

"So, that's a yes?"

"Yeah,"I said.

He gave me a couple pancakes, along with scrambled eggs. I took the syrup from the counter and slathered the eggs in syrup.

"That is disgusting, Brian,"He joked.

"A little something my friend showed me,"I said.

"Your friend?"

"Andy,"I said,"He got it from Allison. I met them in detention."

"You never told me about that,"He said.

"I couldn't,"I said,"Not with how angry you and mom were. I knew I shouldn't have done it but...if I hadn't been at that detention, I wouldn't have met Sammy."

"Was she there?"

"No,"I said,"John was."

"Samantha's brother?"

"Yeah,"I said,"And the guy that beat me up freshman year."

"That was him?!"

"He's not a bad guy,"I said,"He apologized to me, he felt really bad. I met Sammy when John was in the hospital. His..father almost killed him."

"Tell me about the detention,"He said.

_12:00 P.M._

Sammy's POV

_**Two hours untill the wedding. Terrific.**_ I was at the church with Claire and John, and thier son of course. John was in the nursery room with little John and the twins. Claire was getting my hair and makeup ready.

"Brian loves you,"She said,"You're going to be fine."

"Yeah. Right. Sure."

1:00 P.M.

_**The dress. Gotta wear it.**_Claire helped me put it on. I was scared, crying too.

"Where's Brian,"I asked.

"He's here,"She said,"But you can't see him because it's.."

"Bad luck,"I said,"Got it. But will you tell him something?"

"Sure."

Brian's POV

"Tell her I can't do it,"I said.

"Brian, you'll be fine,"My dad said.

"No,"I insisted,"I..I don't even know what to say to her. Aren't you supposed to write vows or something? I..I didn't write anything!"

"Just tell her what's on your heart,"He said,"Be honest, tell her how you feel about her."

"Ok,"I said.

"Brian,"He said,"Your mother would be proud."

I nodded. A lump formed in my throat as I thought of how she would have reacted.

_2:00 P.M._

I waited at the alter and looked at the small audience in the pews. Sammy's friends: Ashley, Xander, Larry, Mikey, and a couple people from the college. My old college roomate Dan, and some people I know from college. John's friends, including Andy and Allison, and that guy Matt, that I met at John's wedding. My father in the front row, Claire holding little John, the twins in their crib, and...holy crap, there she is. Samantha, arm interlocked with John at the elbows. Music playing, people watching Sammy, no one knowing how nervous I was. Funny thing is, Sammy looked scared too, beautiful, but scared. Her dress flowed past her feet, the veil over her face was almost clear. John glanced at me as he let go of Sammy and she stood on the alter with me. The priest began talking as Samantha and I held hands.

"...Samantha Bender, do you take Brian Johnson to be your lawfully wedded husband?..."

Sammy's POV

"I do,"I said.

"...Brian Johnson, do you take Samantha Bender to be your lawfully wedded wife?..."

"I do,"Brian said.

_**Good. Well, that's it, then. Let's kiss.**_Then, Brian did something. He spoke up.

"Samantha,"He started,"I have to tell you what's on my heart. I love you. Since the moment I met you, I knew you were the one. You helped me through everything, you supported me, believed in me. I..I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you."

_**He's so sweet.**_I was tearing up.

"Brian..."I started,"You helped me to trust again, you helped me heal. You are always there for me, and I want to be there for you. I love you, with every fiber of my being."

"...You may now kiss the bride..."

Brian lifted my veil and we kissed. I actually cried as everyone clapped and Brian and I walked out of the room. Brian put his arm around me.

"Are you okay,"He asked.

"I'm great,"I said,"Brian, what you said in there..that was..sweet."

"My dad told me to be honest,"He said,"Tell you what was in my heart."

"Veins?"I joked.

"And arteries,"He joked back.

"Is the food ready?"

"Probably."

We went to the room with the food, then invited everyone in.

Brian's POV

John was glaring at me from across the table as he and Claire sat across from Sammy and I. Kids chairs were set up for the twins and little John.

"What,"I asked him finally.

"Nothing,"John said.

"Then why are you staring at me,"I demanded.

"John, what are you doing,"Sammy asked.

"Annoying Brian,"John joked.

"Be nice,"Sammy requested.

"Yeah John,"I repeated,"Be nice."

"He's obnoxious,"John said,"Can I hit him?"

_Sunday, January 25..._

It was time to go back to the dorm. Sammy and I went in a car with my dad, John and Claire followed in a car behind us. My dad helped Sammy and I put the babies in their cribs.

"Bye Brian,"My dad said.

"I'll see you next weekend,"I said,"If I can."

He left. John and little John, and Claire hugged Sammy. Claire waved to me, then grabbed the car keys out of her pocket.

"We'll be in the car, Johnny,"She said.

She took little John out to the car with her. Sammy went off to check on the twins, leaving me alone with John.

"Uh...hey John,"I stammered.

He stepped forward and hugged me tightly.

"Take good care of her,"He said,"Okay?"

"I will Johnny,"I said,"I promise."

"Good,"He said,"I'll see you."


	41. Sammy Date Reference Guide Part 2

1984-

Tuesday, Sept. 18- Sammy tells Larry what happened

Thursday, Sept. 20- Sammy gets detention

Saturday Sept. 22- She goes to said detention

Saturday, Sept. 29- John and Claire have a talk

Monday, Oct. 1- Claire finds John's book

Saturday, Oct. 20-Sammy goes to court

Wednesday, Nov. 7- Sammy turns 16

Tuesday, Dec. 25- John Lee Bender Jr. is born

**1985-**

Monday, Jan. 7- Mike returns to school

Monday, Mar. 11- John finishes his book

Thursday, Mar. 28- John's book is published

Saturday, Mar. 30- Sammy gets hit

Wednesday, April 10- Cynthia is born(adopted by Mike's parents)

Saturday, May 4- Sammy goes to prom with Xander

Friday, May 31- Larry gets revenge on Andy

Saturday, June 1- *CENSORED*

Monday, June 3- Allison and Matt

* * *

><p><strong>IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING, MATT FROM ALLISON'S STORY IS NOT THE SAME MATT AS THE ONE BRIAN MET.<strong>

* * *

><p><span>Tuesday, June 18-<span> Fools in love

Wednesday, July 31- Brian and Sammy go down to the lake(twins concieved)

Saturday, Aug 10- Brian gets an engagement ring

Monday, Aug. 19- Sammy has dinner at Brian's house

Sunday, Dec. 1- Brian proposes

Monday, Dec. 2- John finds out

Wednesday, Dec. 25- John Jr.'s first birthday

**1986-**

Monday, Mar. 3- Sammy goes into labor

Tuesday, Mar. 4- Magenta Ralph Johnson(12:10 p.m.), and Trevor Malcolm Johnson(3:00 p.m.) are born

Sunday, June 1- Sammy's graduation

Saturday, Aug. 15- Brian and Sammy move into the dorm

Saturday, Sept. 20- John sees his mother

Friday, Nov. 7- Sammy turns 18

Thursday, Dec. 25- John Jr. turns 2

**1987-**

Monday, Jan. 5- Sammy gets a wedding dress

Saturday, Jan. 24- Brian and Sammy get married


	42. The Movie Offer

_Sunday, May 17..._

I was sitting on the couch with Elizabeth, my physics lab partner, studying for the final this Thursday.

Sammy's POV

I came back to the dorm to find Brian and a blonde girl sitting on the couch, giggling, and looking at a book. Like John, I saw the worst, and absent-mindedly twisted my wedding ring on my finger. I stood in the doorway, staring like an idiot, untill Brian said something.

"Sammy,"He greeted,"You're back early."

"Yeah,"I said.

"Sammy, this is Elizabeth,"He said,"Elizabeth, this is my wife, Samantha."

The girl nodded at me, then left.

"It's not what you THINK,"He said.

"Hmm.."

"We were studying,"He said.

Brian's POV

"Sammy, don't be mad,"I said.

"What's to be mad about,"She said,"I mean, you were just studying, with a pretty girl, on the couch, alone. AND you didn't tell me."

"I forgot..."

She stared at me.

"There's a physics final,"I said,"It's huge, like five hundred questions, and an essay. She wanted help. Knowing I'm the smartest in the class, she asked me to study. I was busy yesterday, so I told her we'd study today. She's just my lab partner."

She nodded.

"I believe you,"She said.

"You do?"

"Yeah,"She said,"I know you wouldn't hurt me. I trust you, it's just..."

Nick. If he wasn't in jail, I'd slit his throat for what he did to Samantha.

"I get it,"I said.

_Saturday, June 6..._

John's POV

"John, are you okay,"Claire asked.

"Yeah,"I said,"I'm just thinking."

"About what?"

"It's..it's stupid,"I said.

"No,"She said,"Tell me."

She sat by me.

"I was thinking that maybe I should go to college,"I said.

"That's a great idea,"She said,"We should both go."

"You think so?"

"We can go to the community college, in the fall."

I kissed her.

"You're great,"I said,"You know that?"

**1988-**

_Sunday, Jan. 24..._

Sammy's POV

I got back to the dorm to find Brian lighting candles at the kitchen table.

"You're just in time,"He said,"Dinner's almost ready."

I came closer to see two plates set, surrounded with a napkin, fork, knife and spoon. The microwave beeped, and Brian took out a bowl of carrots. He gave me some, then him. Out of the oven came medium steaks. Eventually, he sat across from me.

"Happy anniversary,"He said.

I smiled.

"How did you manage to sneak this past me,"I asked.

"I have my ways."

Brian's POV

And now...for the present. I took the box out of my pocket and handed it to her.

"A present,"She remarked.

She took it and opened it, gasping at the gift inside.

"Dolphin earrings,"She asked.

I nodded, almost regretfully.

"Do you like them,"I asked.

"Of course,"She said,"In fact, I might just give you a little present tonight."

**1989-**

_Wednesday, Feb. 8..._

John's POV

I was in my room, changing my shirt, when I heard little Johnny.

"Daddy,"He asked,"What happened?"

He was pointing to my scars. The ones so clearly all over my body. I quickly put my shirt on and kneeled down to him.

"Come here,"I said softly.

He ran over to me.

"My parents...your grandparents...were mean to me,"I started,"They did things, things that hurt me."

"Why?"

"I don't know,"I said honestly,"I guess they didn't like me."

He hugged me.

"It's okay, Daddy,"He said.

**1990-**

_Thursday, May 31..._

I should have known she'd bail him out. It was only a matter of time. I was in the living room, watching cartoons with Johnny and talking to Claire when a car pulled into the driveway. I watched as a person got out.

"Claire,"I said.

"Yeah?"

"Get Johnny, go to the bedroom, and lock the door."

"Why?"

"That man,"I said,"Is my father."

"Shit,"Claire remarked.

"GO,"I insisted,"Lock the door. Don't come out, no matter what you hear. If it's too bad, call the cops."

She nodded reluctantly and walked away to the room. I stood tall, swallowing my fear. I hated him, for what he did to my sister, what he did to me. _**I am twenty-four years old, I have no reason to be afraid of him anymore.**_ I answered the door, he pushed past me.

"Haven't seen you in a while, Johnny-boy,"He said.

"Don't call me that,"I demanded.

He lifted me up by my shirt.

"Just what the fuck are you gonna do about it,"He demanded.

"What do you WANT?!"

"Can't a father just come by to see his son,"He taunted.

"No. Not YOU."

I was blindsided with a punch to the nose. Bleeding, it was broken again.

"Never could keep that mouth of yours shut, could you,"He yelled.

I felt like a fucking toddler again, completely defenseless. I swung my fist at him, but he caught it and twisted my arm painfully behind my back.

"I learned a little something in prison,"He said.

Claire's POV

I locked little John in the room after I lied him down for a nap. I had the key in my pocket. I snuck down the hallway and peeked into the living room. John told me to call the police if it got bad enough. _**What was 'bad' enough for John?** _His father had John's arm twisted behind his back. I could see why John was so scared of this man. He was larger than John, muscular, slightly balding, and had some tattoos.

"How to be a fucking prick,"John snapped.

**_John really does push it._**

"How to fight,"His father said.

The sudden paleness in John's face told me that his arm had been snapped. He didn't move, didn't scream, nothing. His father shoved his head into the carpet, making his arm bend at a weird angle, and stepped on his head.

"You're NOTHING,"His father said,"You hear me, you piece of shit?!..."

He continued as he appeared to try to squish John's head.

John's POV

"Get up,"I heard him shout.

I sat up, whimpering from the pain of my arm. I watched helplessly as he stabbed me in the stomach, I don't know how many times. The last thing I heard was a scream, probably mine, then everything went black.

Claire's POV

"No,"I shouted.

John's father ran out the door, leaving behind the knife, as John lay on the floor, a bloody rag-doll. I ran over to him, trying to see if he was alive. He was breathing, barely. I called an ambulance and stayed by him.

"John,"I pleaded,"You'll be okay. It's just..just a little blood."

I grabbed his broken arm and tried to twist it back to it's natural position. He emitted a low groaning noise. I winced.

"Sorry,"I said,"I'm sorry John."

Finally, when the ambulance came, I got little John out of the room and went in the ambulance to the hospital with John.

John's POV

I was alive, and awake, sort of. I could hear, and feel, but I couldn't move. Someone touched my hand.

"Is he okay,"Sammy's voice, concerned.

"Yeah,"Claire said,"He's in a coma."

"You saw it,"Sammy asked.

"Most of it,"Claire said,"The stabbing."

No. You weren't supposed to see that.

"You'll be okay, John,"Sammy said.

"Everyone's here, John,"Claire said,"Andy, Allison, Brian, Sammy, the twins, little John."

Good. Good, little John is safe.

_Monday, June 4..._

Brian's POV

I was worried about John, very worried. And I can't sleep when I'm worried. Sammy, who was out of college, worked at the high school as a therapist to troubled kids. I taught physics at the college. Claire, who worked at a salon, had taken the week off to stay with John. Claire and Sammy were sleeping on chairs in John's hospital room, which they'd been doing since last Thursday, when he was in the coma.

"Claire?"

I looked at John to see his eyes wide open, then him sitting up in the bed, pale and sweating.

"John,"I asked.

"What happened,"He asked.

"Your father..."

He winced and touched the bandage on his stomach.

"Bastard..."He mumbled, and I knew he wasn't talking about me.

"Do you want to talk to Claire and Sammy?"

"Let them sleep,"He said,"They don't want to see me."

Sammy's POV

Brian woke me up. It was somewhere around two in the morning. The twins were at home, being watched by Andy and Allison. Little John was here, snuggled up on Claire's lap. I saw John, awake and miserable.

"John,"I exclaimed, not caring if I woke anyone up.

I ran over and hugged him tightly.

"Hey Sammy,"He said.

"Claire told me what happened,"I said.

"She saw it,"He said,"She saw him do it."

John's POV

I thought of what he said to me:.."You're NOTHING...piece of shit..." I've had three days to consider that while in my coma. The scene played over and over, along with every other time I'd talked back and he hit me. Each time, I saw how much I was to blame. Maybe, if I hadn't have talked back so much, been more tolerable, then he wouldn't have done this.

"I had this coming,"I reflected.

"John..."Sammy said.

"I did,"I said,"If I was a better kid, they wouldn't have..."

"He's crazy,"She said,"He escaped from jail."

"He ESCAPED?"

"Yeah,"She said,"The police found him in a bar, the same day he attacked you. He was..shot in a bar fight."

"He's dead?"

She nodded. I was shaking, refusing to cry.

"You almost died,"She said,"I know Claire saw you, but she doesn't care. Well, she does, but she doesn't blame you. I was so worried, John. When I heard he escaped, I thought he'd come after me."

"Did he?"

"No,"She said.

"What about our mother?"

"She's come over before,"She said,"Asking to see the twins. I told her to leave us alone."

"John,"Claire's voice.

She ran over to us, carrying a drowsy John Jr. I couldn't look at her, feeling like I failed her.

"Are you okay,"She asked.

"A little sore,"I said,"But, yeah."

She stared at me.

"I'm sorry,"I said.

"What for?"

"I let him in the house," I said.

"You didn't flinch, "She said, "When he broke your arm."

"You weren't supposed to see that."

"You're brave, John, "She said,"You kept your son from getting hurt."

Claire's POV

John just looked at me. I set John Jr. down, and he climbed on the bed with John. John hugged little John as the little on cuddled up next to him.

"I missed you, Daddy, "John Jr. said.

"You did, huh, "John asked, "Well, I missed you too, little buddy."

Little John was smiling.

"Claire, "John asked.

"Yeah?"

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him your dad hurt you," I said, "And you were tired, and would be asleep for a while."

"Okay, "He said.

I kissed John, then kissed John Jr. on the head.

"Goodnight John," I said, "And Johnny."

"Goodnight Claire."

"Goodnight Mommy."

I sat down by Sammy, who was holding hands with Brian.

"I hope he's okay," I reflected.

"He's scared, "Sammy said," I would be too, if I saw him. John usually believes what our parents tell us."

"That's..."

"Wrong, "She finished," I know. But you saw him while he was defenseless. It's not the first time this has happened."

"The stabbing or shoving his face in the carpet?"

"Both, "She answered, "John was humiliated. That's why he sent you and little John to the room. To protect you, and so you wouldn't see what happened."

Sammy's POV

Brian grabbed my hand. I could see how angry he was. If I'd learned one thing over the years, it was that he had one hell of a temper. Never toward me, or the children, but anger he felt when the people close to him were hurt. He and John were definatly close, Brian loved John just as much as I do. He cried when he heard what happened to John, as did I. When we knew for sure that John would survive, that's when Brian became angry. He's not one to express his anger, or any emotion for that matter. He bottles everything up.

"Brian are you okay," I asked.

"Fine, "He said.

"You're upset," I said.

He sighed.

"Are you sure he'll be okay, "He asked.

"John's hurting," I said, "He won't show it, but I know him. After a while, he should be back to normal. Well, normal for him anyways."

_Tuesday, June 5..._

John's POV

I got to go home, after hours of convincing Claire that I was okay. It wasn't until then that I truly realized, my father is dead. _**He can never hurt me again. But...he's gone.**_ I'd never tell anyone, not even Claire, but I was almost sad to know he was dead.

"John,"Claire said,"Talk to me."

"What's to talk about,"I asked casually,"I'm fine."

"You are not,"She said,"Your father's gone...doesn't that bother you?"

"I never told you,"I said.

"Told me what?"

"Follow me,"I sighed and got up.

I went to our room and opened a drawer, pulling out a notebook filled with writing.

"I was thinking of writing another book,"I said.

I handed it to her, and she opened and started to read it. She looked horrified as she read and flipped through the pages. She gasped and looked up at me.

"This is terrible,"She said.

"Gee, thanks Claire,"I said.

"That's not what I meant,"She said,"It's just...what you went through."

I snatched the notebook from her and put it in the drawer.

"Well, I'm afraid today's session of 'why is John so fucked up' is over,"I said,"Goodbye."

I went into the living room and turned on the TV. Claire followed me. I will never show weakness again, not to her, not even to Sammy.

"What,"I asked her.

"You know what."

"If you expect me to break down and cry like some sort of damn therapy session, it ain't gonna happen."

She sat by me.

Claire's POV

"John..."

"I'm not going to talk about it,"He yelled,"So just forget it okay? Forget it!"

"Okay,"I said.

I kissed him and went off to our room. Only after I left did I see him crying on the couch, the TV turned up so no one could hear. I didn't bother him, didn't want him to feel exposed again.

_Saturday, June 16..._

We got a movie deal for John's Breakfast Club book. Millions of dollars for movie rights.

"Are we sharing the money with Samantha and Brian,"He asked.

"Yeah, if you want,"I said.

"Maybe Andy and Allison,"He said,"Since they were there, too."

"Yeah, okay."

_Saturday, July 7..._

Brian's POV

I got nervous when Sammy drove with the kids alone. Not that I didn't trust her to drive, but after what happened to me, I didn't want to leave my kids without a mother.

John became secluded since what happened with his father. That was understandable. He didn't smile, except when he was around little John, Sammy, or the twins.

Samantha's nightmares had returned, the memories of her old house.

We were at John and Claire's house, which was in downtown Chicago(Sammy and I still lived in Shermer). Claire was throwing a party for John's movie deal. Andy and Allison, who had moved to New York, were there too. The two had good news.

"We're having a baby,"Andy exclaimed.

They were unmarried, because as Andy said: "Marriage is bullshit", to which Allison agreed: "Love doesn't need contracts". Allison still did drawings and paintings, selling her artwork in museums and on displays, really getting a name for herself. And Andy, he had to stop wrestling, or playing football, or any sport in general. He broke his leg in his last year of college while he was playing football. He played that too, and sometimes basketball. He had to stop playing competitively.

John was in his room, and Claire worried for him. Sammy had told me more than once about when he put the gun to his head. It was the day she first kissed me.

"Brian,"Claire said,"Where's Sammy?"

"She's picking up the cake,"I said,"Should be here in a few minutes."

_**I hope. No, don't think like that. She'll be okay. I won't lose them.**_ I went to check on John, who was laying on his bed, holding his arm, which was in a cast. I guess he thought it made him look weak, because he hid it from me as he sat up.

"Hey Brian,"He greeted,"Sammy here?"

"Cake,"I said.

"Hmm."

"Are you okay, John?," I asked.

"Fine. Why do you ask?"

He seemed to find the ceiling quite interesting. I approached him and shut the door.

"What are you doing,"He asked.

"I want to talk,"I said.

"About what?"

"Your father."

He made a whimpering sound in the back of his throat.

"What about him?"

"Everything,"I said,"John, you're shutting everyone out."

He closed his eyes and flinched, like he was recalling a painful memory.

"I was two, maybe three, when they started in on me,"He said,"It was him first. And she just watched. Then she joined..."

I hugged him, half expecting him to shove me away and beat the crap out of me.

"I made the right decision,"He said.

"And what's that?"

"Not killing you when you started dating my sister,"He joked.

Samantha's POV

Brian picked up the children (now 4) and hugged them.

"I missed you,"He said, which really meant,"I'm glad you didn't die."

When I saw John, it was just like old times. We hugged, and talked about things. He told me about the conversation with Brian, and got his mind off of our parents, and he cheered up.

Brian supervised Trevor and Maggie as they played with John Jr.(now 6).

_Wednesday, August 1..._

Brian worries too much. That's why when John, Claire and John Jr. went off to Los Angeles to discuss the movie deal, he said goodbye to the three like he would never see them again. He had nightmares, about their plane crashing, getting mugged, killed. He told me these, but I didn't tell John or Claire, as not to worry them.

He had a nightmare that night. He woke me up around three in the morning.

"Are you real,"He asked.

"Of course I am,"I said,"What happened?"

"You..."He said,"And...Maggie..."

I held him tightly.

"Thought I'd never see you again,"He said.

"I'm here,"I said,"I'm not leaving."

He stayed awake, holding me as I went to sleep.


	43. Alternate Ch 42

**A/N: THIS IS AN ALTERNATE I WROTE TO CHAPTER 42. I WAS GOING TO USE THIS VERSION, THEN DECIDED THAT I DIDN'T HAVE ANYWHERE TO GO WITH IT, SO I SCRAPPED IT IN FOLDER ON SOME PAPER. I DECIDED I'D SHARE IT WITH YOU.**

1990

Thursday May 31…

Sammy's POV

I was visiting John, since it was summer break and the job I had at the high school is out for the summer. I'm sort of a therapist, for abused and troubled kids. I had yet to start working full time, getting my own office. Brian worked down at the community college, as a physics teacher. John started fixing up old cars and selling them, using the money from his book. Claire worked in a salon, doing hair and stuff. I was lying on the couch, Brian was in the kitchen reading, when a car pulled into the driveway.

I never expected to see HIM. Not in a million years. I thought a thirty year jail sentence would keep him away for at least a decade or two. Maybe our mother bailed him out. Why would she? She hated him nearly as much as we did. I didn't really let him in. He just kind of came in when I stupidly opened the door.

"Where's John," He asked gruffly.

"Can't you talk to me?" I said.

He glared at me. I was shaking. That's when John walked in. He was, of course, shocked to see our father. Fear flashed across his face, then a look of false bravery.

"Hey Johnny-boy," Father taunted, "Long time, no see."

"What do you want," John demanded.

"Can't a man just come by to see his son," He said.

"No," John said, "Not YOU."

John was greeted with a punch to the mouth. Stunned, his nose was bleeding, probably broken again. I stood quietly as I watched John get beat up, until Brian pulled me into the kitchen.

"Who is that guy?" He asked.

"My father," I said.

"Oh my god," Brian said, "Should…we call the police?"

I saw the pleading look on John's face as the arm pulled behind his back was twisted, and his face went pale.

"I have to help John," I said.

I ran over to John just as our father was stepping on his head and calling him 'nothing'. I didn't see the bloody knife until I was closer to John.

"No!" I screamed.

I pushed Father away from him. John lay on the floor, a bloody ragdoll.

John's POV

The last thing I remembered was my head being shoved into the ground, and a sharp pain in my side. I was blacking out, but not before I saw my father start wailing on Sammy. I heard Brian shouting and running toward her. He doesn't know what he's getting into.

Brian's POV

"John," I shouted, "Wake up!"

John didn't move. He was pale, and his arm was bent at a bad angle. He'd stopped bleeding from the knife wound.

"Brian…" Sammy said.

She was crying, looking like she would puke.

"I'm sorry," I said.

Sammy sat at John's side, trying to wake him up.

John's POV

I was alive. Something was wrong. I couldn't move.

"He's in a coma," I heard Sammy say, "He should wake up in a few days."

"Is he gonna be okay?" Claire asked.

"He lost a lot of blood," Sammy said, "Even for John."

"It's okay, Sammy," Brian said, though he didn't sound too confident.

"You saved him, Brian," Sammy said, "And me. Don't feel bad."

Great. Rub it in my face. Sammy's knight in shining armor saved her, while I watched and did nothing.

Monday, June 4…

It was dark, so I knew it was night. I drifted in and out as I heard someone approach me. Maybe it's my dad, come to finish the job, kill me in my sleep.

"Hey John," Brian's voice, "I don't think I could tell you this if you were awake. I never meant for it to happen, and I'm sorry. He was hurting Sammy, trying to kill you. I had to stop him. So, I picked up your father's knife, and stabbed him."

Brian's POV

I saw John's shocked milky-brown eyes staring at me.

"You…you killed him?" John asked, his voice cracking.

"Yeah," I said.

"I guess you saved us," He said lightly.

I saw he was crying, but I said nothing.

"John, it wasn't your fault," I said, "I know you would've helped Sammy, but…"

"I was too weak," He finished.

"You were bleeding to death," I said, "You tried to help her, don't you remember?"

"No," HE said.

"You tried to get up, and you reached for Samantha," I said, "But your father stepped on your arm, it was the broken one, and you whimpered. You passed out. That's about the time I…stabbed him. Sammy managed to reset your shoulder, but your arm was snapped back at the elbow. She stopped the bleeding. She's amazing."

"Yeah," He said.

Sammy's POV

I was shaken awake by Brian.

"John's awake," He said

Little John was snuggled up on Claire's lap, while John was awake and miserable.

"John!" I exclaimed, not caring if I woke anyone up.

I ran over and hugged him tightly.

"Hey Sammy," He said.

"Did…did Brian tell you…?"

"Yeah, he did," He said.

John's POV

I remembered the last thing my father said to me: "you're nothing…you'll always be nothing.." I had three days to consider that. The scene played over and over, and each time, I saw how much I was to blame. Maybe, if I hadn't talked back so much, been a terrible kid, he wouldn't have hit me.

"I had this coming," I reflected.

"John…"

"I did," I said, "If I was a better kid, they wouldn't have hit me."

"John, he's crazy," She said, "He tried to kill you. He escaped from jail."

"Escaped?"

"Yeah."

"John," Claire's voice.

I didn't look at her. I couldn't, felt like I failed her. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw she was holding a drowsy John Jr.

"Are you okay?"

"Kinda sore," I said, "But yeah."

I let that bastard in the house.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"What for?" Claire asked.

"He got in the house," I said, "If you or little John were there…"

"John, that was me," Sammy said.

Claire's POV

I set little John down, and he climbed up on the bed with John. John hugged little John as the little one cuddled next to him.

"I missed you, Daddy, "John Jr. said.

"You did, huh, "John asked, "Well, I missed you too, little buddy."

Little John was smiling.

"Claire, "John asked.

"Yeah?"

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him your dad hurt you," I said, "And you were tired, and would be asleep for a while."

"Okay, "He said.

I kissed John, then kissed John Jr. on the head.

"Goodnight John," I said, "And Johnny."

"Goodnight Claire."

"Goodnight Mommy."

I sat down by Sammy, who was next to Brian.

"Is he going to be okay," I wondered aloud.

"He's scared," Sammy said, "He thinks he deserved it."

Sammy's POV

Brian grabbed my hand. I could see how angry he was. If I'd learned one thing after all these years, it was that he had one hell of a temper. I flinched as he touched the black ring around my left eye. He looked guilty, like he'd done this. It wasn't him who wailed on me, it was my father. Brian was pissed when he saw the bruises that were forming on my body. If Brian wasn't there…I didn't want to think about what might have happened. I shuddered.

Brian's POV

It was self-defense. At least, I hoped the court would see it that way. I can't go to jail. I can't leave Sammy alone like this, to raise the children by herself. I knew she would come to accept that her father was gone, or maybe she already did. She would resent me for it, eventually, maybe even want a divorce, never let me around her or the kids again. I got up and walked over toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Sammy asked.

"Home," I said, "To see the kids. And get some sleep. You should too."

Samantha and I lived in a rented house across from John and Claire. She nodded and followed me to the car.

At home, we were informed by a drowsy Andy that the twins were asleep and had been since 9:00. Sammy and I went to our bedroom. I slipped on my pajamas and lied by Sammy in the bed. She looked nervous and scared.

"Are you afraid of me, Samantha?" I asked.

She shook her head.

"No," She said.

She wrapped her arms around me and scooted close.

"Are you sure?"

She let go of me and turned to the drawer, pulling something out of it. I turned on the lamp as she handed me a necklace. The same one I got her nearly half a decade ago.

"You still have this?" I asked.

"It's the best gift you've ever given me," She said, "Besides the children. I still wear it."

She took it back and held it before putting it in the drawer.

"You got it because you loved me," She said, "Not because you expected something in return. You got it out of the goodness of your heart."

She kissed my neck.

"I know you," She said, "You would NEVER harm anyone, not on purpose."

Sammy's POV

"I KILLED someone," He said.

"You were protecting me," I assured him, "And John. I saw you cry when John was in that coma. You love him just as much as I do."

_Tuesday, June 5..._

John's POV

I got to go home, after hours of convincing Claire that I was okay. It wasn't until then that I truly realized, my father is dead. He can never hurt me again. But...he's gone. I'd never tell anyone, not even Claire, but I was almost sad to know he was dead.

"John,"Claire said,"Talk to me."

"What's to talk about,"I asked casualy,"I'm fine."

"You are not,"She said,"Your father's gone...doesn't that bother you?"

"I never told you,"I said.

"Told me what?"

"Follow me,"I sighed and got up.

I went to our room and opened a drawer, pulling out a notebook filled with writing.

"I was thinking of writing another book,"I said.

I handed it to her, and she opened and started to read it. She looked horrified as she read and flipped through the pages. She gasped and looked up at me.

"This is terrible,"She said.

"Gee, thanks Claire,"I said.

"That's not what I meant,"She said,"It's just...what you went through."

I snatched the notebook from her and put it in the drawer.

"Well, I'm afraid today's session of 'why is John so fucked up' is over,"I said,"Goodbye."

I went into the living room and turned on the TV. Claire followed me. I will never show weakness again, not to her, not even to Sammy.

"What,"I asked her.

"You know what."

"If you expect me to break down and cry like some sort of damn therapy session, it ain't gonna happen."

She sat by me.

Claire's POV

"I don't want to talk about it," He said.

"It's fine," She said, "You don't have to."

"Good."

I grabbed his hand, which was the one with the broken arm. He flinched, like I might snap his wrist or something.

Brian's POV

I woke up to Sammy punching and kicking at me. She was asleep.

"No…no.." She mumbled.

I grabbed her arms and shook her gently.

"Wake up, Samantha," I begged.

She squirmed away from me and whimpered.

"B..brian?"

"Yeah," I said, "It's me."

I held her close to me.

"It's okay," I said, "I'm right here. You're safe now."


	44. Trevor

2001

Monday, August 20…

Trevor's POV

First day of freshman year. I was nervous. As nervous as humanly possible. Maggie, on the other hand, was calm and collected as usual. She'd grown over the summer; taller body, darker hair, tanned, larger umm…chest. She was pretty, not in a weird sexual way, but in the way one appreciates the look of another human.

"Trevor, are you ready?" Maggie asked.

"Yeah, just a minute," I said.

I finished getting dressed and ran out to the kitchen, where Maggie was dribbling her basketball. She loves basketball, started playing in fifth grade. I can't play sports. I'm too small and scrawny.

"Nervous?" She asked.

"A little," I said.

"You'll be fine," She assured me, "Don't worry."

"Right," I said with disbelief, "Let's go."

"Dad's waiting in the car."

She set her basketball on the floor and ran out to the car. I followed her. The car was a brown minivan. Maggie got in the passenger seat, I got in the back.

My father, Brian is his name, is a hugely tall, but insanely nice man. My mother married Hercules, and I come out looking like THIS. My hair is light brown and slightly past my ears, my eyes are the same shade of brown. If my hair was any longer, I'd look like Uncle John. I'll get to him later.

"Are you guys ready," My father asked.

"Yeah," Maggie said.

"NO," I said.

He sighed and backed out of the driveway, going to the high school. He never listens. He only cares what Maggie has to say, I'm just a shadow, the unwanted twin. Even Mom ignores me sometimes. I'm not sure if they do it intentionally, maybe it's just too hard for them to care.

"We're here," Dad said.

Maggie got out of the car and grabbed her bookbag. I followed.

"I'll pick you up this afternoon," Dad said, "Love you guys."

I said goodbye, then ran into the building ahead of Maggie. Locker 109, combination: 19,27,3. Easy enough to open. I put my bookbag in and took a notebook and a pencil. I closed the locker. Maybe this won't be so bad.

Maggie's POV

Trevor has always been very self-conscious, and shy. He's also prone to getting picked on. He's a nice guy, good looking enough, I couldn't get why anyone would want to hurt him. I tease him, but only playfully. So when he came home with a black eye, I was worried.

"What happened?" I asked him.

"Not much," He said, "What about you?"

"I meant your eye."

"Oh this?" He pointed, "Just a misunderstanding, that's all."

"Trevor, you're my brother. If someone's picking on you…"

"No," He interrupted, "It's fine."

I stopped. Trevor is stubborn, he'd argue to the ends of the earth rather than admit something was bothering him.

"Okay," I said, "But if you want to talk, I'm here."

"I know."

Saturday, December 1…

Brian's POV

I put my head down on the kitchen table.

"What's wrong?" Sammy asked.

"Nothing," I said.

"I know you, Brian."

She sat by me.

"It's Trevor," I said.

"What about him?"

"He's been kind of quiet lately," I said.

"Trevor's always quiet."

"Well he tends to bottle things up."

"Gee, I wonder where he gets THAT from," She joked.

"Very funny," I said, "But…do you think he's angry at me? For not paying enough attention to him. I mean, between Maggie and her basketball…"

"You think you've been neglecting him," She finished.

"Mom! Dad!" Maggie screamed.

Samantha followed me up to where Maggie was standing.

"It's Trevor," Maggie said.

Maggie was crying. I was the first to reach Trevor, who was convulsing on the floor, a bottle of cleaning stuff on the ground near him. I sat him up and held him, so he wouldn't choke.

"When did this happen?" I asked.

"I don't know," Maggie said, "I hadn't hear from him since this morning. And when I came to check on him…I saw this."

Trevor's POV

The first thing I heard when I woke up was my father's voice.

"You're awake," He said.

"Yeah," I said.

I was in a hospital bed.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Wouldn't you like to know," I said bitterly.

Brian's POV

"Maggie told me someone's messing with you at school," I said.

"What do you care," He snapped.

"I love you, Trevor," I said.

"Bullshit! You're stuck with me!"

It was the same argument, the same one I had with my father. You love her more, you love Maggie better than me. Except I'm on the other side.

"Trevor, I DO love you," I said, "Just as much as Maggie. I'm proud of you."

His face seemed to brighten.

"You are?"

"Of course," I said, "You're very smart, like I was at your age."

"I love you too, Dad," He said.

I got up and hugged him tightly.

"I'm sorry," He said.

"It's okay," I said, "But…tell me who's picking on you."

"His name's Kyle," He said, "It's him and a couple of his friends. They…they beat me up and stuff. It's not too bad."

I raised my eyebrows. He sighed.

"Okay," He admitted, "It's a little scary, he's threatened me a few times. But if I tell on him, he might…"

"Put you in the hospital," I finished, "Yep, that sounds like what happened to me in high school."

And that…is when he burst out in laughter.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"YOU…used to get beat up?" He asked in shock.

"I was small in high school," I said, "Smaller than you."

"So what happened?" He asked.

Trevor's POV

"I married his sister," He said.

It took a second to process that.

"Uncle John?! Uncle John used to bully you?" I asked.

"Yep," He said, "Freshman year."

"And I can still take him…"

Uncle John and Aunt Claire came in the doorway.

"Hey Trevor," John said, "About time you woke up."

"Where's Junior?"

"In the cafeteria," Claire said, "Getting pizza."

I looked at Dad.

"What about Mom and…"

"Same."

John and Claire sat next to my dad.

"You see Trevor," John started, "Back in the day, I could really kick some ass."

"But now, he's too old," Dad joked.

"Then, your father had the balls to date my sister," John said, "And Samantha seems to get angry whenever I hurt him."

Mom came back later, followed by Maggie, who smiled when she saw me. Mom ran and hugged me.

"Hi mom," I said.

Sammy's POV

"Trevor, honey," I said, "I'm…so glad you're okay."

"Are you mad?" He asked.

"Well, a little," I admitted, "But…that's not important right now."

I saw his arms, the marks that were on them, small but noticeable. Similar to the ones on Brian's stomach. I gasped. He pulled back his arms and put them in from of his face. Flinching, as if about to be hit, which neither I nor Brian have ever done. I told Brian silently what I saw, and he came over to Trevor.

"Let me see your arms, son," He said.

Trevor held his arms our, looking scared, terrified as if Brian might rip his arms right off. Brian touched one of his cuts, Trevor winced. Tears formed in his eyes.

"New?" Brian asked.

Trevor nodded.

"Today," Trevor said.

"You need help, Trevor," Brian said calmly.

Trevor nodded again, crying now. He looked over at me and I put my hand on his head.

"I don't like seeing you in pain, Trevor," I said.

Brian's POV

Brian's POV

Later that night, John, Claire and Jr. went home, leaving Sammy, Maggie and I with Trevor. Maggie talked with Trevor for a while before the both of them decided to get some rest.

"Brian," Samantha said.

"Hmm."

"Have you ever….hit Trevor?"

"No," I said honestly, "Of course not."

"He was scared, like someone was going to hit him."

"He's embarrassed," I said, "Just like I was."


End file.
